MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT:

I'm really sorry about not updating anymore, I didn't mean to bail on all of you. But I've had some drama with a certain gang of internet, well what's a nice word to describe them –despots perhaps?- who actually seem consider themselves knowledgeable critics.

I joined this site for fun, I never pretended to be an actual competent writer I write out strange stories because I don't know what to do with all of my imagination. I joined this site because it seemed like a fun way to share the strange inner workings of my mind not for people to abuse me and my poor innocent mailbox!

So I kind of got fed up and signed off for a while: you see, I've graduated high school and hence I consider myself to old to get involved in something as juvenile as online fights (note: nobody wins an online argument, both parties just come off as looking like complete idiots). And I'm sorry for those of you who were actually into this story and were actually keeping tabs on it but I hope you get where I'm coming from: every type of online abuse isn't just stupid but also very unpleasant for the "author" involved.

A couple of months after my hiatus the big purge started which was apparently caused by this little group of people and that just made me question the neutrality and fairness of this site. Some of the stories were indeed against the rules I get that, but a lot of them weren't…so who says that when I get targeted again the site won't just delete my story pointblank?

I'm going to take some time to reevaluate the situation; maybe I'll continue posting on this site maybe I'll start up a tumblr or something to get away from all this drama because the story is actually finished on my laptop.

Anyway yet again I am sorry for ditching this story for so long, but I hope you understand the predicament. I'll keep you posted.


Oh wow, is it 2012 already? My bad *sheepish grin*

Well sorry for the long delay but do understand I've got quite a hectic school life right now.

Not only have classes and papers been keeping me busy but I'm also involved in an international project at my school which means I'm mentoring and guiding a whole gang of American students who are currently attending my school, which has been quite a handful: the whole Europe-America thing apparently is a huge culture-shock.

But that's beside the point, I hope the chapter can make up for my blatant lack of updating and since I've just finished my exams and my Americans have finally seemed to have found their footing for the most part I should be able to update a lot faster.

So now without further redo: the return of the New York version of Blair Waldorf!

…..

..

Chapter nine: The Devil wears Hermes

'Oh sweetie, of course I'm not threatening you. I'm just strongly advising you to do as told-, that's what a lady does…though you obviously wouldn't know anything about that.'- Blair Waldorf

..

…..

Happiness wasn't living in a calm, non-stress atmosphere, it wasn't being able to finally semi-know how to drive nor was it being in a loving stable relationship with someone who positively adored her. No, happiness was shopping, darting in and out of shops, cooing over soft fabric and gorgeous colours and leaving with lots and lots of exciting goodies.

And Blair Waldorf was currently experiencing said happiness as she darted through the streets of Port Angeles, her arm linked with Kim's as they pushed Claire's stroller while Embry and Quil dutifully followed carrying their purchases in silent misery.

Port Angeles wasn't, by any stretch of imagination, 5th Avenue: the clothes were tolerable at best and horribly mainstream kitsch most of the time. The stores didn't offer perfectly presentable, knowledgeable personnel or glorious monogrammed high-end paper shopping bags lined with the softest of tissue paper. But right now all of that didn't matter, because after two weeks of none-shopping she was pretty sure she was only about one inch away of enjoying shopping at Walmart.

'Why did we agree to this?' Quil muttered as he carelessly swung around the bag containing several headbands Blair had bought at some wishy-washy accessory store-, she made a mental note to buy some more presentable ones online, but these would do…for now.

'Because Jacob and Jared had to patrol but didn't want them heading out alone,' Embry retorted dully, 'so Sam told us to accompany them.'

'Why do we always do what Sam tells us to? Even when he's not using his Alpha voice?' Quil grumbled kicking a can off the sidewalk, nearly catapulting it to the other side of the street.

'I don't know-, maybe because he's Sam and he can kick our asses without even trying,' Embry drawled.

'Well it kind of sucks,' Quil stated matter-of-factly and then and there Blair had enough of his complaining and spun around to fully glare at them: flaming eyes, arched eyebrows and all.

'Can you two like stop complaining? We've only been here for half an hour!' she said rolling her eyes in exasperation because honestly what was half an hour when shopping?

'And in that half hour you've raided four stores,' Embry stated with an amused smirk.

'Yeah Blair, are you sure your ancestors weren't Vikings or something?' Quil added.

'And you,' Blair said pointing an accusing finger in Quil's general direction, ignoring their little barb point-blank, 'how can you complain? Claire's obviously pleased,' she said motioning towards the toddler who was happily cooing over the stuffed animal Blair had bought her, 'so as her imprinter you should be pleased by default!'

'I like seeing Claire happy, I don't necessarily like the things that make her happy,' he said matter-of-factly, throwing his tiny imprint an adoring smile which she happily returned.

'In short he's gonna keep complaining,' Embry quipped causing Blair roll her eyes.

'Well turn down the volume and I'll buy you food-, a lot of food.'

They threw her matching grins, obviously pacified by the prospect of food: they honestly were ruled by their stomach.

'Men,' she muttered turning back to Kim, 'they're so useless when shopping; hardly certified to carry the bags.'

Kim threw her an amused little smile: over the last two weeks Blair had grown to like Kim and her timid-nature and they were friendly-ish, or as friendly as Blair could be.

'We can hear you, you know!' Embry called as Blair serenely continued her way down Main Street promising herself to completely ignore any further complaining.

'You were supposed to,' she retorted in a singsong voice as her eyes scanned the shop windows before finally falling onto a gorgeous pair of black booties that would look gorgeous on Kim. She abruptly halted in front of the store, excitably pointing at the black McQueen-like booties. 'I'm buying you those.'

'What?' Kim said her eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights. 'Blair! You can't buy me those, they're three hundred dollars! You can't buy me a three hundred dollar present!'

'I can and I will,' Blair stated her tone strictly no-nonsense. 'Besides I'm sure professional driving lessons would have cost me way more than a pair of boots.'

'They're three hundred dollars!'

'I can afford it,' Blair said with a dismissive wave of the hand. 'They're nice and I like having well-dressed people around me! It's as much of a treat for me as it is for you.'

'Kim please just let her buy you the shoes,' Quil said actually being useful for once, 'you know she's stubborn and I really don't want to spend the rest of the day camping out in front of a shoe store. I'm growing ovaries as we speak!'

'Dude you've been growing ovaries ever since you imprinted,' Embry quipped.

'Have not!'

'You can name and identify all the My Little Pony characters!'

'That show is great for her social development!' Quil argued.

Embry threw him an unimpressed look: 'like I said OVARIES.'

'They're always like that aren't they?' Blair questioned rubbing her temples in frustration.

Kim let out a chuckle: 'you're only figuring that out now?'

'I clung to hope.'

'Well I-,' Kim trailed off, the smile melting off her face as her eyes fixed on something in the distance. 'Can we go now?'

Blair raised an eyebrow, following Kim's gaze to a group of girls who were throwing them obvious looks, giggling in the process-, subtle much?

'Do you know them?' she questioned, coolly taking them in: two of them were tall and statuesque while the other one was small and curvy but all three of them had glowing russet skin-, definitely Natives.

Kim bit her lip, her eyes firmly fixed on the floor. 'The tall one's my cousin Jessica.'

Jessica…that sounded vaguely familiar.

'Kim, don't let her get to you,' Embry said wrapping a comforting arm around her frail little shoulders, shielding her completely from their prying gazes: she forgot how sweet and thoughtful they could be…sometimes.

She shot Quil an inquisitive look which he answered by mouthing "Jared" over Kim's shoulder. Blair's eyebrows shot up in comprehension: so this was Jared's infamous flirty ex who was still trying to get her talons into his impressive form even though he was obviously completely besotted with her cousin? Can you say tacky?

In the distance she could hear the group of girls burst into a fresh fit of horrible, migraine inducing fake giggles: someone had obviously been watching too much Mean Girls.

Kim easily slipped from under Embry's arm, her face pale as she bit her lip in a telling effort to keep it from trembling: 'I forgot to call my mom-,' she mumbled hiding her face behind a curtain of shiny black hair, 'I told her I'd call once we got her, she's probably worried so I'll just-,' she trailed off, storming off leaving behind a fresh batch of horribly pitchy giggles.

Embry nervously raked a hand though his hair, visibly uneasy at the thought of a crying female as he watched her hastily retreating back: 'I guess I should go after her-,'

Blair rolled her eyes: girl runs off crying, people should always chase her-, typical male deduction.

'Don't you dare Call!' she stated grabbing his arm more for emphasis than anything else. 'She ran of because she didn't want you to see her cry, you running after her would definitely defeat the purpose.'

'Are you sure?' Quil asked throwing her a doubtful look. 'Isn't it like the purpose of storming off that people, you know, chase you?'

'No plebeian it depends on the situation,' she stated crossing her arms impatiently. 'Now tell me exactly why Kim ran off crying so I can properly asses this situation-, because as much as she loves him this train wreck can't be all Jared related.'

Embry threw her a sheepish look. 'You're not going to like this.'

'Spill.'

'Jared's crowd-, not Jared specifically, was pretty awful to Kim before the whole wolf-thing went down,' Embry explained cautiously. 'Things sort of eased up after Jared turned all protective-wolf-in-love and completely trashed the next guy who gave his Kimmy grief but Jessica and her bitch brigade-,'

'Hey! Toddler in hearing distance!' Quil complained throwing his friend an angry look which he just shrugged off.

'Jessica never really stopped giving her grief, she still wants Jared and she's just a total jealous-,' he threw Claire a glance, 'person.'

'Wasn't so hard now was it?' Quil muttered.

Blair would've rolled her eyes but she was too busy glaring holes into the squeaking group. Dear Lord if she tilted her head and squinted-, ignoring their different colourings the harlot even looked like little J. So dealing with her wouldn't just secure Kim's mental sanity but would also be therapeutic to her and her Upper East Side yoghurt-trauma! It was basically a win-win-situation! Who could argue with that logic?

But she wasn't here to scheme-, and she was trying to be sweet goddamnit! She took deep steady breaths as she internally recited her new mantra religiously: sweet and gracious like Hepburn, sweet and gracious like Hepburn

Oh screw Hepburn, it was Scarlett O'Hara time and the trollop was going down…

'Hold my Birkin,' she muttered tossing the precious bag in Embry's general direction, relying on his wolf-reflexes to catch her valued possession. She flipped back her hair for affect before pointedly strutting over in her four-inch Jimmy Choo heels that gave her an air of supremacy that could not be ignored-, even by the fashionably challenged.

'Blair, what are you doing?' Embry called after the initial surprise had worn of but he might as well have asked a brick wall: she was already halfway over and in full Blair-Bitch-mode.

She darted over to that thing with cool confidence; it was watching her intently along with the rest of the herd. She halted right in front of her mark; effectively blocking her way with her petite frame and sheer female intimidation.

'Get lost,' the girl-, Jessica said with naive disregard as Blair gave her a very apparent, critical once over; her eyebrows raised in contempt as her gaze went from her three inch roots to her tacky Wal-Mart wedges.

'God,' Blair breathed with faux sweetness, though the sharp underline was apparent for everyone to hear, 'they were right; you're pretty from far but really far from pretty.'

'What?' Jessica retorted visibly flummoxed; obviously not the brightest star in the heavens…but she'd already gathered that much just from her outfit.

Blair just smiled sweetly in return: the Jared part might be stretching the truth-, just a little bit but the statement was sincere enough. Jessica wasn't pretty; one just thought she was because she was tall and thin with long glossy hair-, but her skin was caked in an inch-thick layer of ill-chosen foundation in a futile attempt to conceal it's bumpy texture and her features were far too rough for her long thin face…she was a carefully constructed mirage that came apart as soon as you took a closer look: Rachel had been right, Jared had horrible taste in girls-, before Kim of course obviously imprinting installed a certain sense of quality when it came to women, just ask Jacob.

'Who are you?' Jessica's tiny friend asked giving her a distrustful look: at least one of these amateurs recognized a real apex-predator when they saw one…

'Oh silly me,' she said carrying on in her cheerful Miss-America tone, 'I'm Blair, Jacob's girlfriend and consequently Kim's new best friend.'

Okay maybe she was stretching the best friend thing but note how she referred to Kim as an actual friend and not just a minion…Serena would be so proud-, or well of the friend-thing, she'd probably just frown disapprovingly at the ripping-into-idiots part…

'Aw she's got Jacob's making friends for her now too?' Jessica giggled. 'Well at least you're her age-, the Rachel and Emily pity party thing is just plain embarrassing.'

'Well at least her friends can't be removed by a good topical cream,' she retorted in a sing-song voice only to be yet again met by confused looks, she couldn't help but roll her eyes: amateurs.

Jessica huffed-, though obviously unsure of what exactly had been said, she apparently realised it wasn't very flattering. 'Look I don't know-,'

Blair just waved a hand in front of her face affectively shushing her: 'stop your lips from moving; I'm not done talking to you. Now I've gathered you can be a bit of a bitch, especially when your cousin and her relationship to Jared are concerned. And since I've taken a friendly interest in said cousin it would be in your best interest to back off-,' she offered the faux-redhead a smile, 'or face the consequences-, which may be unpleasant-, especially for you.'

'Are you threatening me?' Jessica said disbelievingly, distinctively resembling a cow watching a train go by.

'Oh sweetie, of course I'm not threatening you,' Blair shot back positively saccharine. 'I'm just strongly advising you to do as told-, that's what a lady does…though you obviously wouldn't know anything about that.'

'I'm not afraid of you,' Jessica said crossing her arms defiantly-, though her tone said otherwise.

Blair took a deep breath: god this girl was either dense or clueless, or possibly even a combination of both.

'Listen Jessica, I'm Blair, Waldorf, I own New York and now I'm effectively taking control of this area so I STRONGLY advise you to GET WITH THE PROGRAM!' Blair said letting her irritation finally take over as she gave them her best crazy-Joan-Crawford-eyes. 'So keep your cheap red manicure and overstuffed bra away from Kim's Jared and back-off you Native American Snookie or I will DESTROY you!'

'Jess,' the tiny, semi-smarter one said being the first to recover from well Blair. 'Maybe you should just back off Jared, he's obviously not interested and-,' she threw Blair an antsy look, 'I honestly don't think he's worth the trouble.'

Hallelujah someone had seen the light of Waldorf!

Jessica just nodded, fearfully staring at Blair. Blair on the other hand couldn't suppress a smirk: finally things were taking a familiar direction.

'So we agree?' she said unable to suppress a smirk: finally the natural order of things was restored, she was feared and obeyed by the lower human life forms, it reminded her of New York!

'Yes,' Jessica answered dutifully.

'Okay, I'm done here!' she said cheerfully offering them a dazzling smile as if she hadn't just pulled absolute authority on them. 'Ta-ta ladies and Jessica try not to forget our little chat, okay?'

She turned her back to them; with a hand on her hip and a dramatic swoosh of her hair before casually walking back to Quil and Embry who were staring at her-, like fish.

'What?' she asked, arching a perfectly shaped eyebrow.

'What was that?' Quil questioned looking somewhat befuddled.

She threw them her most sugary smile: 'I have no idea what you're talking about.'

'Blair you just went Total Recall on them and you're honestly going to act like nothing happened,' Embry added.

'Not that it wasn't epic,' Quil added, 'because I might not know what exactly happened…but you totally won.'

Blair sighed: there obviously was no way in hell that these two were going to keep their mouth or their mental mouths for that matter shut and Jacob was so going to find out about her less appealing qualities-, this was going to be such a problem.

'It was nothing-, all right?' she said, glaring them down.

'You're actually tying to deny you did something nice?' Quil said somewhat unimpressed by her glare, apparently spending so much time with Leah desensitised them from angry glares-, it was so irksome and it left her no choice but to deny this ever happened.

'I didn't do anything, now hand me back my Birkin,' she said snatching her precious plum matte faux-crocodile Birkin from his oblivious, unworthy hands.

'You name all your handbags?' Embry questioned.

'No, just the 100,000 dollar ones,' she muttered rolling her eyes. 'It's the model's name plebe, are you honestly telling me you've never heard of thé Birkin bag?'

'You paid 100,000 dollars for a bag AND you let me hold it? Are you CRAZY? And no I haven't heard of it, I'm from LA PUSH not Vogue-town.'

'More like crazy rich,' Quil muttered giving the Birkin an impressed look.

'It's a Birkin,' Blair stated simply. 'It's not just a bag, it's an investment. Now are you just going to stand here like hobos or are you going to look for Kim and help me fix this mess?'

'Kimmy!' Claire cheered clapping her hands together, pleasantly oblivious to everything that had just happened.

'Yes sweetie, we're going to go get Kimmy and how about we get a yummy milkshake after that?' she cooed indulgently.

'Milkshakes?' Quil said, his head popping up eagerly.

'I was asking Claire, you big oaf,' Blair stated, 'now push the damn stroller and sniff search for Kim.'

'We're shapeshifters-, not dogs,' Embry muttered matter-of-factly.

'I said sniff,' she retorted with a dismissive wave of the hand: why they insisted on nitpicking about details she had no idea.

Three hours latter the Jessica-incident was just a distant memory as Kim and Blair lounged on the couch at Emily's house, cup of tea in hand and surrounded by their spoils of war: surprisingly enough it turned out Port Angeles actually had some decent little boutiques that offered acceptable brands and of course she'd bought Kim those delectable little booties.

Needless to say she was currently silently enjoying her after-shopping-spree-buzz.

'Hello beautiful,' a deep baritone said snapping her out of her train of thought before being enveloped by a familiar warmth as Jacob pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

'Hey,' she said turning around, a soft smile spreading across her features when she took him in looking like a Greek God dressed solely in his cut-off jeans-, not even in her wildest dreams had she guessed she would ever find cut-offs attractive. 'Had a nice patrol?'

He shrugged: 'pretty boring.'

'Boring is good, means no scary vampires are chasing you,' Blair stated causing Jacob to let out a soft chuckle before leaning in and pressed a chaste little kiss to the corner of her mouth.

'I'd ask how you're shopping trip was but judging from all the bags you enjoyed yourself.'

'It was okay.'

'She insisted on buying me three hundred dollar boots,' Kim piped up shaking her head, snapping out of her exhausted coma; apparently she wasn't used to shopping expeditions, go figure.

Jacob stared at her unblinkingly: 'three hundred dollars?' he repeated slowly.

'Aww sweetie did you hit your head?' Blair drawled sweetly as she patted his arm.

'Ask her to introduce you to Birkin! Her 100,000 dollar bag!' Quil hollered from the kitchen, briefly interrupting his pigfest just to rat her out: oh she was honoured, insert eye roll here please.

'100,000 dollars,' Jacob mouthed wide-eyed. 'Please tell me he's kidding.'

'Sadly no,' Embry said waltzing into the room and flopping down next to Kim, 'her bag really does cost more than my house.'

Blair sighed; she was such a martyr for her handbags: 'a Birkin is not just a bag, it's an experience.'

'Not just a bag huh? Does it fly you to the moon? Because for 100,000 dollars it should.'

'I had to specifically request a faux-crocodile skin and the clasp contains diamonds Jake! So it's a pretty reasonable price for an absolute icon of craftsmanship!'

'Diamond clasp?' Jake repeated visibly unimpressed by her little speech. 'Do you really need a diamond clasp?'

'I don't need one per se-,'

'Better start saving up those pay checks bro!' Embry interrupted amused. 'You imprinted on the Poor Little Rich Girl.'

'Ignore him, though I admit wealth is an attractive quality in a man, it doesn't guarantee a happy relationship, billionaires are fickle,' Blair mused before taking a sip from her cup of tea. 'Trust me, I should know,' her mind drifting back to the Basstared, the hurt was still there but the once sharp pain had been dulled to a soft ache: she supposed she had Jacob to thank for that.

'So I don't need expensive presents to keep you happy huh?' Jacob questioned bowing down to playfully nuzzle her neck, before pressing a kiss the tender skin.

'Expensive no, presents yes,' she said playfully pushing him away as she fought to keep herself from giggling. 'I'll settle for being an economic girlfriend but not for being a cheap one.'

'I can definitely live with that, as long as your mine,' Jacob stated with that adorable half-grin of his before pressing a chaste little kiss to her lips.

'Awww,' Kim cooed as Embry made a face.

'Just take her home already and leave the mushy stuff for when you're alone in the car-, I just ate you know,' Embry said with mock disgust.

Jacob rolled his eyes and threw a very rude hand gesture in Embry's general direction.

'Scrooge is right though,' Blair stated, 'Daddy's expecting me to come home for dinner today, apparently you're hogging me.'

'I take pride in hogging you,' Jacob said taking her hand and gently pulling her to her feet and flush against his warm body.

'You're awfully touchy feely today Mr. Black,' Blair said in mock annoyance.

'It's not my fault you're so gorgeous I can't keep my hands off of you.'

'And here I thought he'd reached his maximal sob-potential during his Bella-phase, obviously I was wrong,' Embry drawled earning himself a playful whack in the shoulder, courtesy of Kim.

'It's sweet.'

'Of course you think it's sweet, you're dating mister-romcom.'

'Embry you know how he hates it when you call him that!' Kim chided sisterly. 'Don't you remember what happened last time?'

'Of course I do, he sucker-bit me in the hind leg.'

'Let's go,' Jacob whispered in her ear as his two friends continued their friendly little banter, 'before Jared gets here and gnaws on Embry's arm or something.'

'You really think he would do that?' Blair questioned as Jacob led her out of the room and into the kitchen, an arm wrapped casually around her waist.

'Who says he hasn't done it before,' Jacob deadpanned as he sneaked her out of the house and for all his wolfy stealth Emily still caught them and they had to spend at least fifteen minutes explaining to her that there was no way they could stay over for dinner no matter how much food they made because Blair was sure there was never something as too much food when the shapeshifters of La Push were involved…

'Emily loves you, you know, they all do,' Jacob stated as he helped her into the passenger seat of her truck; he preferred to drive and she would always be a typical New Yorker who preferred to be driven around-, it was a win-win situation.

'Of course they love me, I'm extremely loveable,' she quipped: he didn't have to know most of New York would vehemently disagree with that statement, she preferred to keep him in his adoring little bubble of besottedness.

'I heard what you did for Kim,' Jacob said easily hopping into the driver's seat.

Blair pursed her lips as the engine roared to life: 'who told?'

Jacob threw her a sheepish grin: 'Quil.'

She rolled her eyes in annoyance: sometimes she swore these boys were worse gossips than Gossip Girl herself!

'You know he can't not tell me something the mental connection is a total pain when you're trying to keep a secret,' Jacob chuckled noticing her disgruntled expression. 'He was really impressed you know.'

Blair just raised an eyebrow prompting him to continue.

Jacob kept his eyes on the road but she could see how the corner of his mouth tweaked upwards in a sort of smile: 'he said you took care of her like a real Alpha…and that you practically bit Jessica's head off,' he let out a loud chuckle, 'I honestly didn't know you had it in you.'

Blair fought the urge to let out a very unladylike snort but realised there was no way Jacob could know about her aggressive Queen Bee status back in New York and she personally would like to keep it that way…just because he'd sworn to love her for all eternity no matter what-, didn't mean he should know about the less appealing aspects of her personality.

His hand on her thigh snapped her out of her fretting little monologue: he was watching her intently, his dark eyes burning into her anxiously but as much as his constant attentiveness flattered her sensitive ego, she really would've preferred him watching the horrifying forest road with such attention.

'You're not mad are you?' he questioned with a worried frown that could only be described as adorable. 'He meant it as a compliment.'

'Of course not,' Blair stated placing a dainty little hand over his large, broad one. 'I just don't want Kim to find out; she doesn't want me fighting her battles.'

What? That was part of the truth…

Jacob nodded, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel uncomfortably: 'Kim has like no confidence,' –like she hadn't figured that one out herself- 'she always had it kind of rough at school…Jared still beats himself up about it but she just pretends nothings wrong which just makes him feel like an even bigger dick.'

'Well don't expect any pity from me,' Blair mumbled: Blair Waldorf rarely dabbled in the act of pointless pestering…especially after being on the receiving end of a yoghurt cup.

'After what you yelled at Jessica, I'm pretty sure nobody expects any pity from you.'

'Ladies don't yell Jacob,' she chided, 'they simply clearly express their opinions.'

'Whatever helps you sleep at night babe,' he retorted with a grin, gently squeezing her thigh.

'Speaking of sleeping have you been camping outside of my house again?' she said throwing him an accusing look.

Jacob let out a hearty laugh: 'I told Seth you were going to notice! He was patrolling your side of the woods so I told them to check up on you and the idiot apparently stepped on a rose bush-, he had so many thorns sticking out of his paw, he looked like a freaking cactus! It took Emily fifteen minutes to pull them all out.'

Blair's mouth twisted into a smile but she couldn't help but raise her eyebrows: 'so you're sending people over to check on me now huh?'

She just knew something was up when the smile melted off of his face and was repeated by a deep frown that made him seem much older than he was making her want to reach over and smooth out the harsh lines.

'Collin smelled a vampire yesterday,' he muttered apprehensively, 'it was outside our borders but still-, it just kind of stresses me out you know…especially now that I have you.'

Blair threw a reassuring smile at him; luckily she was an expert at fake smiles because honestly she didn't feel reassured, at all. Blair Waldorf could handle lots of things; she was practically born to take things in stride with grace, determination and brilliance because duh she was Blair Waldorf! But part of her knew that when it came to vampires…she was way out of her dept.

They sat in comfortable silence for the rest of the ride home, occasionally making small talk about some non-explosive, non-vampire related topics until they stopped in front of her house and removed today's purchases from the car before actually lifting her out of the car causing her to let out a loud laugh.

'Jacob put me down,' she commanded half-heartedly.

He just grinned before and lowered her slightly, so her tiptoes brushed the ground: 'Neah, I like having you just hanging around like this.'

Blair playfully rolled her eyes: 'Très drôle, Jacob.'

'Let me guess that translates to: "you're so lame right"?'

'Possibly.'

He did that adorable little half smile of his before leaning his forehead against hers: 'you're not worried, right?'

'Should I be?'

He shook his head: 'I would never let anything happen to you-, the world needs a Blair Waldorf.'

She smirked: finally someone acknowledge her obvious world altering potential.

He softly kissed her on the lips: 'I need a Blair Waldorf.'

Her smirk unconsciously twisted into a genuine smile as she cupped his cheek: 'thank you,' she mumbled sincerely, her thumb drawing the Chanel pattern on his skin.

'For what?' Jacob questioned leaning into her hand, kissing the palm.

Blair shrugged daintily, biting her lip: why did she thank him? Hell since when did she thank people, full stop? She'd never blurted out a thank you before; her thank-you-s were the result of elegant manners or calculated decisions…not just an automatic response to every sweet little nothing someone whispered to her...God was she turning nice? For real? Okay, it's official, Jacob was way too much of a good influence on her.

'Blair?' Jacob's deep baritone snapped her out of her somewhat disturbing inner-monologue.

'Yes?' she replied somewhat clumsily: focus Waldorf!

'Fantasizing about other guys?' he quipped, boyish grin firmly in place.

'Why? One girlfriend fantasizing about vampires not enough for you?' she questioned, eyebrows raised, her infallible Waldorf-wit regained.

Jacob gave her a blank look; he'd obviously not seen that one coming. 'Low blow.'

'I hate competition,' she retorted nonchalantly: despite the claims that Jacob was indeed her soulmate and couldn't possibly ever love another woman-, and the fact said woman was a walking dead person, a species he usually shredded, she was still quite suspicious of this Bella-person and the leash she had on her boyfriend.

'There's no competition,' he assured her before pressing a warm, chaste kiss to her lips.

'Jacob, how come I always seem to walk in on you molesting my daughter?' her father's voice drawled seemingly out of nowhere.

Jacob jolted away from her almost dropping her in the process: for all his claims at wolfy-stealth people always managed to sneak up on him when she was around-, she took great pride in that.

'Sorry sir,' he muttered, holding up his hands as if to demonstrate their innocence.

'Daddy, don't tease him you know how flustered he gets,' Blair stated, smoothing out her dress as she threw her father an eye roll: daddy had decided to continue his tradition of teasing her beaux, it was such a hassle. 'Besides we were only saying goodnight.'

'That's how you kids say goodnight now a days?' he retorted, a smile twitching at his lips as he raised his eyebrows at her. '

'I don't know, maybe you should ask Roman? I'm sure he knows,' Blair challenged sweetly causing her father to let out a loud chuckle.

'Beware the ruthless Waldorf streak, Jacob,' her father stated before redirecting his attention back to her. 'Roman found a very quaint little restaurant in Port Angeles and you're coming with us since we haven't seen you in what-, four days?'

'Three,' Blair corrected with a straight, business-like face.

'Three days than,' he retorted indulgently. 'Jacob, she has ten minutes to be ready, if she isn't preened and powdered by then you'll see it's not just Blair who has the ruthless Waldorf streak.'

Blair threw a sideways glance to Jacob who nodded stiffly: how he could be so intimidated by a man who he could easily lift with one hand was beyond her-, especially since her father hadn't even managed to intimidate Nate.

'Ten minutes sweetheart,' her father repeated in a singsong voice before grabbing her bags and retreating back into the house, leaving the door open for her.

'Yes daddy!' she called after him, rolling her eyes before being enveloped in yet another one of Jacob's hugs; his arms easily winding around her waist, pulling her to his chest and peppering her face with soft, butterfly kisses.

'Do you have to go?' he muttered, his thumbs rubbing circles on the small of her back.

'You heard him,' Blair said with a small smile as she reluctantly untangled herself from his wanting arms though.

'Stay a little longer,' Jacob said, grabbing his hand and trying his luck at the pout his little imprint seemed to use as a sure-fire way to always get her way.

But she simple shook her head, pulling her little hand out of his grasp: 'You heard what daddy said, I only have ten minutes to get read,' she stated before marching up the stairs and into the house.

'I'll miss you.'

'I'm sure you will, but you know what they say Jacob: absence makes the heart grow fonder,' she said throwing him a little smirk before swinging the door shut with the panache of a young Scarlett O'Hara taking a page out of The Gone With the Wind book of seduction: always leave them feeling unsatisfied.

She darted up to her bedroom, already mentally planning her outfit: her navy captain dress by Eric Javits, her Stuart Weitzman red platform pumps and oh the cute little polka dot foulard she bought in Port Angeles today…

She barged into her dressing room, kicking of her shoes and stripping off her dress before slipping into the navy dress, she was already tiptoeing into her shoes when her cell starting ringing quite insistently; the telltale ringtone of Girls just wanna have fun alerting her to the fact Serena had apparently decided it was time for her daily dose of bff-talk.

Blair snatched the cell from her desk: 'Hey S,' she said cheerfully as she whirled through the room in search of her favourite red Valentino handbag, which she knew would look perfect with her dress.

'Waldorf,' an icy male voice drawled tediously causing the phone to slip through her fingers as if it had burned her, falling to the floor with a dull thud: her heart hammered frantically in her chest as an icy chill went through her spine.

She definitely had not been expecting that-, him calling her and she definitely wasn't ready for it.

'Damn that motherchucker,' she breathed staring at the phone as if it were a ticking time bomb: with or without Gossip Girl, cell phones always seemed to be a catalyst for trouble…

She bit her lip before taking a deep calming, breath: Chuck Bass could intimidate and bully a lot of people but she was definitely not one of them, never was and never would be. She picked up the phone and gave him her best cool, disinterested voice.

'Chuck, to what do I owe the displeasure?'she quipped, calm and composed, even though her heart was hammering at a staggering 100 miles an hour.

'Look Waldorf, I don't care what ingenious little scheme your twisted little mind came up with this time but I'm not planning on playing "where's Waldorf?" all summer just to sooth your bruised ego.'

'Excuse you!' she exclaimed in outrage.

'Waldorf-,' he took a deep impatient breath, 'we both know how this is going to end; you're going to half-heartedly scheme against me, ignore me perhaps before you finally begrudgingly forgive me because at the end of the day I'm Chuck Bass.'

Blair scowled at her telephone.

'Waldorf don't just stand there glaring and say something.'

Stupid bass-tard know-it-all…

'My life doesn't revolve around you Bass,' she sneered coolly, 'I have better things to do than waste my genius on you.'

He let out a sardonic laugh: 'You never could lie to me.'

She rolled her eyes barely able to repress her flaring temper: had she forgotten how infuriating he was? Or had she simple suppressed it?

'Waldorf come back to New York.'

'No! And remind me again what business of yours is it?'

'I'm Chuck Bass, everything is my business.'

'And I'm Blair Waldorf and my business is my own!'

'Waldorf,' Chuck sneered –good to know she wasn't the only one losing her cool- 'I have a private eye on speed dial, either we do this the easy way and you come back on your own terms or I have him drag you back here kicking and screaming!'

'Oh is the big bad Bass threatening me?' Blair snapped. 'Where was this brilliant PI of yours when you had to steal Serena's phone to get my new number?'

'Stealing Serena's phone is like taking candy from a baby Waldorf: why make a fuss when I simply have everything I need at my fingertips?'

Touché.

'You listen to me motherchucker, and you listen carefully: I don't want to come back to New York and I'm not going to come back to New York and absolutely nothing you say or do can convince me otherwise!'

'Yes you do,' Chuck retorted calmly sounding vaguely- amused?

Blair frowned: 'What?'

'Part of you wants to come back; face it, you need New York like you need oxygen and if you hadn't wanted me to find you, you wouldn't have entrusted your number to Serena van der Woodsen of all people.'

Blair head was spinning with unbridled fury: the sheer nerve of that man was sending her into a barely manageable frenzy and her hand was shaking with rage…

Since when did she let Chuck Bass get to her like this?

'Goodbye Chuck,' she stated simply ending the conversation before her emotions go the best of her: refusing to give him the satisfaction of knowing he could get to her-, she refused to give Chuck Bass even more power over her.

T.B.C.

One sentence: "I'm Chuck Bass and I'm here to stay." ;)