Hatter: *laughs*

Eileen: He's insane. RabidOrochimaruOtaku only owns me in this fanfic. Sorry, kids, but that's the truth.

Hatter: Oh, but what about that one person…

Eileen: Oh yeah, and the person who rescued me. She owns her, too. Aside from that, look to the real authors, not her.

Hatter: Down With The Bloody Big Head!

Eileen: We're working that way, Hatter. Thus, with that said, on with our story. Where were we? Ah, yes! Off to the White Queen's Palace!


"Why is it that you're always too small or too tall?" Hatter asked as he finished his tale, and Eileen shrugged. "I'm investigating things that begin with the letter L."

"Laryngitis, Loony, Luna, London, Lord, Lakes, Little, Ladies, Love," Eileen rattled, and stopped at the last one and pondered that thought.

"Now you've regained some of your muchness," he smiled. "Now, let's investigate love. How is love like a hatter?"

"Can't live with them and can't live without them?" Eileen guessed, and he beamed.

"Exactly!" he yelled happily as he clapped his hands in glee. "Now, How is a snake like a princess?"

"A princess can be a Parselmouth," Eileen pondered, and the hatter tilted his head. "You don't know what a Parselmouth is?"

"No. Tell me. I want to know all about the world above that you come from," he smiled, and she launched into a tale of what Hogwarts was like, about the war above and how her father was fighting against her best friend and the two were trying to kill each other as the leaders of the armies, and left almost nothing out that happened to her after age eleven.

"So, in short," she breathed as they reached the white castle. "My world's a mess up there, and will be in even more so once the war is over because the government will start accusing people left right and center of crimes they didn't commit. And they'll put my Uncle in prison for being a Death Eater when he was only doing it as a spy to protect the Champion of my world!"

"My, my," a woman sighed, "That's a horrible fate for your world. Welcome to Mamareal. I am Mirana, the White Queen."

"It's an honor to meet you, ma'am," Eileen bowed lowly as the hatter kneeled.

"It's alright dears," she laughed. "You don't need to bow to me, Eileen Snape-Riddle. Yes, I know of your connection to he-who-must-not-be-named, as well as the taboo upon your father's name."

"I hate him," Eileen snapped. "I hope Harry kills that bastard!"

"Oh me, oh my," the queen murmured. "Quite the feisty new champion."

"You mean compared to Alice," Eileen said putting her arms across her chest, and the queen nodded. "I think we need a game plan. What do we need to do now?"

"You need to be de-aged," she said, "So that my sister won't recognize you. You'll need to infiltrate her castle without… losing your head…"

"I've already lost it," Eileen shrugged, and the hatter giggled maniacally. "He has, too. By the way, your majesty and hatter… I wish you both a Happy Un-birthday."

"Why thank you," they smiled. "And a happy un-birthday to you as well, my dear."

"So, when do I leave?" Eileen asked, and the queen's eyes widened.

"Oh, not for a few days yet, dear," she said quickly. "I believe there is someone here to see you, my dearest ones. Come."

She led them to a fountain and looked at it in confusion. The hatter gasped before realizing who was in the water. His dead father.

"Papa," he croaked. Eileen looked closer to find another couple waiting for her: two angels, both wearing roman togas.

"Hello, baby," the female said, and Eileen realized that she was looking both at her mother, and the woman that Uncle Severus had called his sister.

"Mama," she breathed, and put her fingertips to the water.

"Yes," she breathed. "Yes, yes, it's me baby. Oh, Eileen I'm so proud of you!"

"But, mama, I haven't done anything worthy of pride," she frowned. "I can't even figure out grandmother's riddle."

"Gaunt, or Prince?" the male asked, and Eileen looked at him confused.

"Ah, Eileen, this is your step-father," she introduced. "You'll get to know each other a little more and better once it comes time to fulfill the prophecy."

"But I don't understand! Grandmother said that I was supposed to bring two things back with me to prove to the Wizengamot that I wasn't lying!" she said confused. "I don't understand!"

"You must bring back a human and magical animal from whatever world you go to," he explained carefully, "Your mother's going to be bringing me with her. We… haven't exactly decided on the animal, yet, since we're in… Greece, so to speak."

"Mount Olympus," Eileen realized. "Hercules?"

"Thank Palutena that answer is a no!" Sarah laughed. "No, child, no. You'll get to know each other better soon, I promise. Once the time comes for the prophecy to be nearing completion, we must gather in the Defense Hall of Prince Manor with the Sages."

"Prince Manor with the sages," Eileen repeated. "Wait, who and what am I supposed to bring from here? I can't exactly take the White Queen! I don't want to put her in danger!"

"I'll be going with you regardless of whether I'm chosen or not, dear," Mirana soothed, "It's a part of being me, I'm afraid. There's a fighter in another world who is in the same situation – your mother's twin's acquaintance, if I'm correct."

"Okay," Eileen contemplated. "Cheshire?"

"No," Sarah laughed. "Think again. He can't come with you, I'm afraid. Although I won't deny, it would be funny to see their reactions to him."

"I shall ask him to accompany me," Mirana said sitting on the edge of the fountain. "Perhaps… a snorklak?"

"I'm starting to wonder if this has something to do with the Lovegood family," Eileen muttered, and Sarah burst into a fit of laughter. "Just saying. So, who should I take? I can't take the twins, and everyone else is…"

"I'll go," hatter volunteered. "I'd love to see the above. I've never seen it before, I want to know what it looks like and if it's as wonderful as you say."

"But, hatter-!" Eileen protested, and Sarah cleared her throat. "Yes, mother?"

"Let him," she said, her tone and eyes giving no room for argument. "He is a Hightopp – they are respected above, if only by those who know Madam Malkin's trade."

"Well, we have our champion and her assistant," the white queen beamed. "Now all we need is her steed."

Eileen and the hatter exchanged concerned looks as they deadpanned and the fountain communication was broken.


Okay, the reason I can't give her step-dad's name is cause he's in a different crossover. Her step-father is Pit, off of Kid Icarus, her mom's new husband. She'll have some step-siblings of sorts eventually.