Three months. I sincerely apologize. Like I told Kitty, I'd like to call it writers block, but what I had was a life block. Been going through a lot of changes. I can't promise an update tomorrow, but I am back to writing and will get the next chapter to you soon. I also apologize for not getting back to everyone. Sometimes, there are no words.

Thanks to Kitty Cullen-03 for being so stinkin' amazing! She beta's this piece and gives me constant reassurance.

I still don't own.


JPOV

Bella walked down the stairs and into the room; she was a vision of perfection. I loved that she could be dressed so simply, yet, look so elegant. She had yet to look at me and while she and Kate stood in the entrance of the family room, side by side, I made a quick comparison. Kate was tall, legs that stretched for miles, blond, busty - she was everything a wet dream was made of. Bella was average in every sense of the word, but standing there next to the super model, she had never been more appealing. She was real, tangible; she had physical imperfections that reminded me of why I loved her, and even though I couldn't see them all in that moment, I knew each and every one of them. They were like mental photographs, the ones that could never be erased.

It didn't take long for Bella's eyes to meet mine. I smiled genuinely at her before standing up from my seat and walking over. Kate walked off to take her place next to Edward, for which I was grateful; I've never liked awkward greetings, and most of the time that's the way my greetings ended up. I was hesitant to say anything and slightly embarrassed that Alice had gotten her claws into me right before dinner, even though I did like the look. I tentatively stopped in front of her. I tried to smile, but it seemed to come out as a grimace.

"You like my hair? Alice did it," I stated, knowing that she already knew, but it felt like the right thing to say. She leaned forward, placing her hands on my shoulders. I was confused at what she was doing until she whispered into my ear.

"I do, but Jasper? Please… put your glasses back on." The way she purred… so seductive… my arms instinctively wrapped around her waist and I pulled her body close to mine. She looked up at me, her face flushed. It was a look I'd seen a few times and I knew exactly what it meant – Bella was horny.

I forgot that we were in a room full of people when I leaned forward and took her earlobe in between my teeth, nipping it lightly before speaking against it.

"How about we skip dinner?" I ran my tongue gently against the outer rim of her ear. My cock was straining painfully against the inside of my jeans. I was ready. I needed her.

"We can't do that to Esme, but I promise to make the wait worth your while." Esme? It took me a minute to remember where we were. Instantly I was embarrassed. That whole scene had taken place in front of my entire family, including Rose, whom reminded us all she was there by pretending to gag in the background.

I wasn't ready to release Bella yet, not only because I wanted to feel the closeness, but I didn't think it was a great idea to turn around so that my raging hard-on could greet the room. I rolled my eyes to myself because of Rosalie's immaturity which earned a giggle from Bella. I heard Emmett quietly scolding her. Maybe he isn't that bad, I thought. I was ready to move on. Forgive and forget. He and I would need to talk at some point. I hoped sooner rather than later. I wasn't really one for putting things off.

We stood in the doorway for a couple more minutes, listening to the chatter behind us, when Esme called everyone to the dining room. Bella and I were the last to walk out of the room and just before we entered the room I grabbed her elbow to stop her. She turned, looking at me in question.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

"I know you were nervous about coming and I just wanted to make sure. We all want you to be comfortable here," I said, and it was honest for the most part. She smiled, placing her hand on my cheek.

"I'm fine, Jasper. Much better than I was when we arrived." She didn't give me a chance to respond. Her lips touched mine gently before she pulled away.

I took her by the hand and led her to the table, where everyone was seated except for Aunt Esme and Carlisle. On one side sat Edward, Kate, Rosalie and Emmett. On the other was Alice. I thought Bella would feel most comfortable sitting next to her, so I pulled out her chair without even asking. She looked at me in gratitude as she slid into the seat. Before taking my own I caught Rosalie's eye and gave her a pleading look, she nodded curtly, but experience told me that she wasn't to be trusted. The only thing I had on my side when it came to Rose and Bella was hope.

After I was seated, Emmett was the first to speak. No one was surprised.

"Alice, where is Tyler?" The table was silent. We had all been thinking the same thing. Alice's high school sweetheart had taken off for college a year before her, but had spent the previous Christmas break with us. I speculated that they were having some problems, but never asked. If Alice wanted to talk about it, she would have.

"Who's Tyler?" Bella asked, chewing on her lip. Everyone besides Kate looked shocked. How could Alice's best friend not know about her boyfriend of five years?

"He's my boyfriend and he will be here tomorrow," Alice said, sitting a little straighter. Her answer held a tone of finality, but Bella was fidgeting and I knew that meant she wasn't going to let it go.

"Your boyfriend? But what about…" She looked around the table. We were all staring at her wondering what she was going to say, but the vehement way Alice was shaking her head told us all that we would never hear the end of Bella's question.

"What do you guys think of Jasper's new look?" Avoidance. There was something we didn't know and Alice decided the best way to make us all forget was to change the subject. Bella was going to help her.

"I love it. I do wish you had left his glasses," she paused, looking over to me and blushing slightly. "But I really like the hair."

Rosalie and Kate were both quick to agree while Emmett, Edward, and I sat still confused and mulling over the previous conversation. It was like the girls had banded together to keep Alice's secret, even though two of them didn't know what it was. I was annoyed and slightly awed.

"Yeah, Jas, it looks great. You should add some highlights. They'd really bring out your eyes," Edward said, mockingly. His hands were flailing around in a dramatic gesture. Emmett laughed, I snickered, and the girls didn't find him humorous.

Shortly after Carlisle entered the room carrying a large ham; I guess I had failed to mention that Bella only eats chicken and fish. I looked at her and smiled apologetically. She patted my leg knowingly as she leaned over and told me Esme already knew. I let out a sigh of relief when my Aunt came in with a small hen. As the parental figures took their seats at the head of the table, we all sat quietly. Just like he did every night we had dinner together, Carlisle held out his hands for the two sitting next to him to take. This time, it happened to be Edward and myself. It was a chain reaction. Hands clasped around the room before he said a prayer.

Our family wasn't overly religious, but Carlisle and Esme believed in routine, structure, and giving thanks. It was something that we all appreciated as we got older. Bella and Kate didn't seem to mind either. Once he was finished, Carlisle stood up and began to distribute the meat. He discretely passed over Bella, giving her a side smile as he moved with grace around the table. It wasn't a surprise that Esme had out done herself. Everything was beautiful, garnished to perfection, but it was nothing compared to what she would have in store for Christmas.

I looked over to Bella as everyone got settled and started passing dishes around the table; her eyes were lit up brighter than the tree. She had told me that her family didn't have many holiday traditions, and that it was always just her and her parents. I felt terrible for keeping her away from them, but at the same time, I couldn't imagine spending our first Christmas away from her. To say that I was relieved when she agreed to come with me would be an understatement. Her nerves and worry were similar to my own. I didn't want to deal with Rosalie and the drama I was sure she would create while we were home, so when I assured Bella that everything would be fine, I wasn't a hundred percent sure that I was being honest, but with Carlisle, Esme, Alice, and Edward on my side I tried to believe that things would be fine. Over the course of dinner, my theory was proven to be true.

Dinner was pleasant. Carlisle told us about his latest project, as did Esme. She took us all by surprise when she said she would be opening a new flower shop. I had never taken her for a florist, but the more I thought about it, the more sense it made. She always loved working in her garden and always put together her own arrangements. A slight tinge of guilt ran through me as I thought about how unobservant I had been to not realize it was actually something she genuinely loved. The feeling was quickly replaced with something warmer when Bella placed her tiny hand on my knee and gave it a small squeeze. When I turned my head to look at her she was looking up at me, a thoughtful expression written across her face. She told me once I wore my emotions on my sleeve. I think she just knew me better than anyone else, or perhaps, she was just observant.

As dinner came to a close, Esme left the table to prepare dessert. While she was away conversation drifted to school and our plans for the next semester. I noticed Rosalie had grown unusually quiet. She shifted uncomfortably with her head down. I wasn't sure if it was the talk about school or if she was just restless, but I hadn't been the only one to notice, and unlike me, Emmett wouldn't hold his tongue.

"You alright, Rosie?" he asked. He looked truly concerned. There was no denying he loved her. I hated it. I wanted to believe he was at fault. That he was the cause of all bad things that happened to Rosalie. But, in truth, Bella was right – Rosalie is a grown woman, who made her own choices, and it takes two to tango. The table got quiet as everyone turned their attention to Rosalie. It took her a minute to look up. She glanced around the table before clearing her throat and licking her lips. I noticed she didn't address Emmett, but let her gaze rest on Uncle Carlisle.

"I've decided not to go back," she said quietly, hanging her head once again. My blood was boiling. What the fuck did she mean she wasn't going back? She had to go back. Even Emmett looked stunned.

"Wha… what?" Emmett asked, stumbling over his words. He was shaking his head from side to side. It looked as if he were trying to wake himself. Rosalie sat wordless.

"Rose, would you please explain? " Carlisle asked as calm as ever, but one look at his face and it was apparent – Carlisle was nervous. Rose didn't take long to answer, sitting up straight in her chair and looking him in the eye.

"I've decided not to go back to school next year; at least not to Dartmouth. I can do all the course work online and still get my degree. It will not only be embarrassing for me, but for Jasper as well. Besides, I will have more time to spend with the baby this way."

"All of your hard work, your accomplishments, -" Carlisle began. Rosalie cut him off quickly.

"Will follow me. Listen, I know you think I'm making the wrong choice, but it is my choice to make. While I wouldn't change anything, the situation has been humiliating." Her body began to tremble as her eyes welled up with tears. She croaked out a sob before continuing. "I just want to do what's right for my family."

Emmett wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her into his chest. She cried quietly as the rest of us sat in silence. Esme walked back into the room; confusion laced her features. She gave Carlisle a questioning glance, to which he just shook his head. She slid into her seat quietly, placing the dessert tray in front of her. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Bella shift uncomfortable. I hoped she didn't think this was how all family meals in the Cullen household ended. It was the third time she sat down with my family and all three times things ended badly.

"I don't mean to pry, but I think you are making a very honest decision, Rosalie," Bella spoke up. I tensed beside her. I wasn't sure if I should laugh or cry. Sit stoic or run. What was she doing?

"What?" Rose asked quietly, turning her head out of Emmett's chest and peeking at Bella.

"My mom decided not to go to school at all. She had me very young and I've always got the impression that she regretted it. At least you are going to finish. You've decided not only what's right for you, but what's best for your family. You've given up a lot, but still you know what you want – sacrifice and compromise. I find that extremely admirable. I wish my mother had done the same, and then maybe she wouldn't still be in search of her own personal happiness."

It was the most I heard Bella say about her family without being goaded. I knew very little about Charlie and Renee, but it was obvious that she loved them unconditionally, and they felt the same about her. Her confession about her mother took me by surprise. I looked at her, blinking rapidly, a small grin spread across my lips. She ducked her head and took a deep breath; she was out of her comfort zone, but said what she did for Rose. It made my heart swell.

"Thank you," Rosalie whispered, with a slight nod. She sat up in her seat and wiped her tears away with her napkin. Our eyes met briefly, hers told me all I needed to know. She was grateful. The mood at the table lightened immediately. Carlisle and Esme both had appreciative smiles on their faces. Esme's never left as she addressed Bella.

"What does your mother do, Bella?"

"An easier question would be, what hasn't she done," she answered with a giggle. Chuckles broke out around the table. "Currently, she is trying her hand at interior design. She doesn't get much work though. Her taste is… unusual."

"Well, I'm sure she is as lovely as her daughter." Esme tone was matter of fact. She was fond of Bella, as was most of the family.

A few moments later Esme began handing out desserts. We all knew that Carlisle wasn't finished with Rosalie, but for the evening we had moved on to more pleasant conversation. Soon, dinner was over and Carlisle was thanking us all for joining. Bella offered to help clear the table, and was happily taken up on her offer. Edward and Kate were the first to rise. He was taking her back to campus. She had an early flight to Kentucky in the morning and wanted to get some rest. Her and Bella hugged goodbye and as they did I thought I heard Bella whisper something that sounded like 'don't worry,' but I can't be sure. The hug alone seemed awkward. The two hardly knew each other. Rosalie and Emmett soon followed, closing themselves in her bedroom for the evening. Alice, like Bella, had offered to help Esme. The three ladies left the table, arms full of dishes, and headed into the kitchen. Carlisle stood and clasped my shoulder.

"I'll be in my study."

"Alright, have a good night." I looked up at him and nodded. It was what he did every night after dinner, but he was always courteous enough to announce it.

"Oh, Jasper? She really is something." He filtered out the door, into the hall, without another glance. I was glad to have his approval. His opinion has always meant a lot to me. He was a good man, loving, loyal, and hard working. Everything I hoped to be.

I stood from the table and made my way up to my room. My feet dragged; the day had been relaxing and not what I expected, but for some reason I was exhausted. Perhaps, it was all the worrying. I took my shoes off and threw them back into the closet. I stopped momentarily to look myself over one last time before taking off the ensemble Alice put together. I found that I really did like the look.

I stripped out of my clothes, placing back on hangers and putting them away. I found a pair of old gray sweats in one of my draws and slipped them on, along with my glasses, before going to lie down. I thought about everything that was said at dinner; Alice's secret, Carlisle's new branch, Esme's new shop, and Rose… Oh, Rose. My mind and heart were conflicted. I always had the highest hopes for Rosalie. She was an excellent student, an overachiever actually, and I just couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that she was willing to through it all away. Was Bella right? Was it a sacrifice and a compromise? Would taking online courses be fulfilling? I didn't know. I had no answers and for Rose, that scared me. We had our lives mapped out. There was a plan and suddenly, everything seemed off.

Bella came in an hour or so later. She let out a heavy sigh as she walked in the door. My eyes were trained on her as she kicked the door closed. She looked at me, smiling wryly as she lifted her sweater over her head and tossed it on top her bag. I shifted my gaze to the ceiling, not wanting her to feel uncomfortable as she changed. The bed shifted slightly. I pick my head up and notice she hadn't changed at all. She crawled up to me slowly, her sides of her jeans moving up and down her hips with every move she made. She paused, looking down at me.

"You put your glasses back on," she breathed, throwing her leg over my waist. I nodded, not knowing how I was supposed to respond. She was breathing heavier than normal. Her chest heaved, making it hard for me to keep my eyes off of her breasts. She leaned forward, licking her lips before brushing them against mine briefly. "I always keep my promises," she purred against my lips. My breath hitched, and my cock sprang to life as my mind drifted back to us standing in the living room.

"Bella…" I wanted to tell her that we didn't have to tonight. She had a long day and I didn't want her to feel obligated. Her lips, her body, were distracting. I couldn't find my words.

"Shhh…" Was the only noise she made as her lips connected with my jaw. She sucked and licked her way down to my neck, stopping to nip at my clavicle. Her hands roamed my body freely, touching every spot besides where I needed her touch the most. I placed my hands on her waist, trying to guide her body down on mine, desperate to feel some kind of friction. She wasn't having it though. She never relented. Her body stayed planted. Her core sat just below my belly button, bra clad breasts brushed my chest lightly as she played… teased.

My hands began to move on their own accord, up the soft flesh of her back. She sat up quickly, taking both of my hands in hers. She moved them up, over my head, and slowly trailed the tips of her fingers down my arms, onto my chest. "No touching," she said with a smirk.

I started to protest, but couldn't find the words once I felt her grasp my erection through my pants. She squeezed firmly, causing me to close my eyes and groan. I felt her lips return to my body. Like she were a playing an instrument, she picked right back up where she left off. It was the first time I'd ever seen her so attentive. There wasn't a spot on my torso that she missed. Her hand continued to tease my cock through the material of my sweats until her teeth grazed my pelvic bone, making my body jerk away from her. She smiled against my skin. I watched her, mesmerized by not only her beauty, but her confidence as she scooted her body down my legs. In the bedroom, she was a different person. I always knew Bella was a sexual being, but the way she handled me, it was like she anticipated my every need.

She slid her hands into the sides of my sweats, hooking her fingers into the elastic waist band and tugging gently. Instinctively my hips came off the bed, allowing her to pull them and my boxers down my legs. I pushed them off with my feet, never taking my eyes off Bella. My stomach bubbled with nerves. I felt nauseous, but I was ready. I wanted her… needed her. Never had I imagined that my first time would be in Carlisle and Esme's home, in my old bedroom, but in that moment it didn't matter.

Bella took my cock into her tiny hand and stroked it gently, her eyes on mine. There was nonverbal conversation, she was asking permission and I was granting it. Suddenly, quicker than expected, her head dipped down and her tongue darted out of her mouth. She was licking the pre-cum off the tip. Something I had only seen in my dreams. I propped myself up on my elbows and looked down at her. Big mistake. I almost came at the sight alone. My head fell back and I shut my eyes, just feeling her lick, kiss, and fondle. It was too much, but not enough. I hissed loudly. The muscles in my stomach were clinched tight, my balls ached, and the anticipation was more than I expected.

Finally, I felt her take me between her lips, inching down slowly. I had to look. I lifted my head. My breath caught in my throat as my eyes were met by hers. The entire scene felt like something out of a movie. Something that shouldn't happen to me, but it was. Whatever I had done to deserve her, I was thanking my lucking stars.

"Oh my… Mm… Bella," I grunted out, feeling her wet, hot mouth wrapped around me. I thought it was good in my dreams… there was no comparison. She hummed around my cock. I could only assume that was a good sign. I lifted my arm, and gently placed my hand on the back of her head. The action was encouraging and she picked up her pace. My hips bucked, again an involuntary action. Shock ran through me when she didn't gag. She hadn't… not once. She took me down her throat with ease. I moaned and grunted as she continued to suck, her tongue stroking around the head. I didn't realize so much could be done with the mouth alone.

"I'm… fuck… cum…" I was trying to warn her, but it didn't work out. I came sporadically and hard into her mouth and she swallowed every single drop. The single sexiest thing she had done, even though I would never have told her that.

Bella sat up after licking my cock clean and kissing the tip one last time. She licked her lips and looked down at me with a satisfied smile. The cheesy grin I wore refused to be wiped away. She lay down on her side next to me. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to hers. She kissed me back hungrily. My hand that was resting on her leg started working its way up. She grabbed my wrist and broke our kiss, shaking her head.

"Not tonight. Tonight was about you. It's something I've wanted to do for a while."

"But,-" I started. She placed her fingers over my lips to stop me.

"No argument. We have all the time in the world. Now, we sleep." She leaned forward and placed a single chaste kiss on my lips. I decided then that I had to be the luckiest man in New Hampshire – in the world - to have such an amazing woman by my side. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her close. I knew there was no way I would be able to fall asleep anytime soon, but when I did, I was sure that my dreams would be sweet.


Please read and review. Did Bella do Jasper's first ever BJ justice?