Kitty, thanks a million for being the best and fastest beta eva!
Thank you all for the wonderful reviews, alerts, and fav's. Sorry if I don't get back to you. I think you rather read the story than hear my rubbage.
I still don't own.
Bella
I woke up to the sound of my cell buzzing. It was muffled by the fabric of my bag, but the sound was too familiar and it jarred me. I let it ring. Jasper's arm was draped over my abdomen, preventing me from moving. Gripping his wrist gently, I lifted his arm and laid it at his side. I turned to look at his face just as he rolled away from me with a light grunt. The sound caused a small smile to break out across my face. I loved watching him sleep. I stretched, yawing, as I looked over at the clock. Nine thirty? It was rare that either of us sleep in so late. My body was sore and I was still in my jeans. My mouth tasted of morning and… Jasper. I licked my lips remembering the night before.
Needing to rid myself of the heavy denim, I threw the covers back and reluctantly climbed out of bed. I scrounged through my bag for my "family friendly" pajama/yoga pants and a t-shirt, changing quickly once I found them before heading down the hall to the restroom. My mind drifted to the Cullen's as I began to get ready for the day. Esme's generosity and friendliness was unexpected, but not surprising. After talking to her for five minutes, I knew it was in her nature. While Jasper was upstairs immersed in a WoW marathon, she kept me busy in the kitchen; all the while, spilling everything she could about her children without making one of them look bad. It was apparent that she loved Rosalie and Jasper like they were her own. I was in awe of her; yet, silently questioned if she could truly be as perfect as she seemed.
I stewed over Kate's confessions. Everything that Edward had done since mine and Jasper's relationship began seemed honorable. Only once did I question his intentions, but standing there in his mother's guest washroom, I started to scrutinize every touch, every conversation that I could remember. The conclusion being that Edward Cullen definitely looked at me as just a friend and tutor. I shook my head at myself for even entertaining the idea that it could have been more. Aside from Jasper and Alice, Edward was the only other person I felt comfortable with and if Kate's accusations were true, things would change. Jasper would never let me see him and Alice would be in an uproar. A sigh escaped my lips as I thought about Alice… my best friend. Why had she not told me about Tyler? The moment the thought crossed my mind, I decided that I needed to speak with her. He would obviously be spending time with us and I didn't want things to be strained between Alice and me when he arrived.
With my teeth brushed and my hair somewhat presentable, I grabbed my stuff and headed back to the bedroom. Jasper was still asleep and I was sulking. I wasn't comfortable enough to explore the house alone, especially with Rosalie home. The previous night at dinner, I was terrified that I would offend her when I spoke out about my mom. It was one of maybe three times in my life I felt like I couldn't keep my mouth shut. The way Carlisle looked at her, with such disappointment, angered me. I wanted her to know that even if her entire family didn't support her decision, someone did. Relief flooded my senses when all she said was thank you.
I grabbed a peculiar book off of Jasper's shelf and sank down in his computer chair to read. After reading the synopsis I looked at Jasper's sleeping form curiously. Teen fiction and faeries? With a shrug I turned back to the book and began to read. Three chapters in, it was a little boring, but I had fallen in love with the lead, Aislinn. I understood her. Her secrets, her fear, the overbearing grandmother – they all made perfect sense to me, even if her fear was only of mythical creatures. Her friend Seth reminded me a lot of my dad's friend's son, Jacob. We were never extremely close and I would never feel about him the way Aislinn felt about Seth, but something about the character felt familiar. I made a mental note to call Jake and wish him a Merry Christmas.
An hour later, I was nose deep in my book, comparing the people in my life to Melissa Marr's characters, when Jasper sat up and said my name. I held up my finger and hurried to read the rest of the paragraph I was on before closing it and sitting it on the desk.
"Good morning," I said, turning my head. He gave me the signature smile he didn't even know he had and scooted to the edge of the bed.
"How long have you been up?"
"Almost two hours. It's almost noon." Jasper's eyes widened as he turned to look at the clock. He jumped up frantically, like he had somewhere to be. I laughed. "Hey, have you read this?" I held the book up in his direction.
"Um, no. I think it belongs to Alice actually. Is it any good?" He pulled up his sweats and walked over to the dresser to find a shirt. I watched him with a smirk. He seemed a little more confident than the day before.
"It's okay. Not really my type of story, but I can't seem to stop reading. Now that I've started I need to know how it ends," I answered with a shrug. He nodded. There was a knock at the door. Jasper looked over at me, his eyes raking down my body. I assumed he was assessing my attire, making sure I was decent.
"Come in," Jasper hollered.
"Morning," Alice's sweet voice bounced off the walls. I didn't look at her. My face would have betrayed me and showed my disappointment. "Bella, can I talk to you for a minute?"
"I'm going to see if Esme made breakfast. I'm famished," Jasper said seriously. He kissed my forehead and gave me an apologetic smile before walking out of the room. I still hadn't looked at Alice.
She took a seat on the edge of the bed and didn't say anything for several minutes. I ran my hands through my hair as I turned my body in the chair to face her. She looked like she was lost for words – so was I. She took a deep breath before lifting her head to look at me. Immediately I saw the regret swimming in her usually bright gray eyes and wanted to hug her, but there were things we needed to talk about.
"Are you mad at me?" she asked reluctantly.
"I'm not mad, Alice. I'm confused. Why didn't you tell me about Tyler?" It was the truth. I wasn't mad at her. I just couldn't bring myself to understand why she would keep such a thing a secret.
"I don't know, Bella. I wanted to, but I didn't want you to judge me. We started dating my freshman year of high school and for four years I was always 'Tyler's girlfriend' and all I ever heard or talked about was him. I wanted something to myself for once. I needed a break. Him being away at school, and me starting a new one provided that. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you. I should have."
I knew how she felt. When I left Forks, I left all of my baggage behind. I wanted to reinvent myself. No one in New Hampshire knew me as the freak or the crazy girl. No one watched me, wondering when I was going to panic or regress. It was nice to get away. The only thing I loved more about New Hampshire than the fact that that's where Jasper was; was the fact that I knew no one.
"I can understand that, but what about Tia? Do you love Tyler, Alice? Because if you do, this thing with-" She didn't allow me to finish before her voice broke out in nothing above whisper.
"I don't know. Tia is great. She's outgoing and fun, smart and beautiful. We have so many common interests, but she is the first woman I've ever been with. I didn't expect to be with her. I didn't seek her out or anything, it just happened. I care about her very much. I'm terrified to tell my family though." She looked away, but I could still see the sadness and conflict in her eyes. She turned back to me and gave me a small smile to reassure me she was fine before continuing, "Things with Tyler are… complicated. He's popular and handsome, but honestly, he has no clue what he wants to do. I asked him once what he wanted out of life and he started rambling off things about sports, cars, and fun. We're young – I get that – but to have no goals in life? I wasn't raised that way. I do think I love him, but we're not the same people anymore. I'm sure he's not been all that forthcoming with me either. I've heard rumors – lots of them," her voice was small as she ended. Things with Tyler bothered her more than she let on, or perhaps it was just the loss of her first love.
"What are you going to do, Ali?" The concern in my voice couldn't be masked. I hated that my friend was hurting. But more than that, I hated that she felt like we couldn't talk about it before. I moved my chair closer, wanting to be able to comfort her if she needed it.
"Nothing. I don't know. I mean, Tia knows about him. I've made her promises I don't know that I can keep. If I break up with him I feel like I'm letting people down." She looked down at her hands. My heart broke for Alice. She always wanted to please everyone around her and put herself last. Even her makeovers were her way of showing love; her way of taking care of us.
"I think you should do what makes you happy. At some point, Alice, you have to put your own feelings before others. I'm not saying for you to run down stairs and declare your love for Tia. I'm just suggesting that maybe ending things with Tyler, soon rather than later, would be easier on everyone, especially you." I placed my hand on her should and gave it a firm squeeze. She nodded. Tears began to stream down her cheeks and she let out a few sniffles.
"You're right. I just… I want to wait until after Christmas."
"That's fair. I think Tyler and both of your families would appreciate that." I would appreciate that, I thought, but left that part out. Being at the Cullen's was hard enough. There was no way I could handle much more drama than what was already on my plate.
"I'm really sorry, Bella. Your friendship means the world to me. By the time I was ready to tell you, everything with Tia was already happening and things just started spiraling out of control," she shook her head as she finished.
"It's okay. We all have things we don't want to talk about, including me. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions or assumed things about our friendship." There was no way I could stay mad at Alice, especially when I did the same thing. I had yet to tell any of them about my past and wasn't planning on it either.
"Well, enough of this. I'm starving and I'm sure Jasper would like to have his girlfriend back. Have you eaten?" she asked, jumping off the bed.
"No. I, um, didn't want to intrude. I've been waiting for Jasper."
"Don't be silly. When you are in this home, it is just as much yours as it is ours. Come on," she ordered, tugging on my hand.
Obediently I got up and followed her downstairs. We found Jasper in the kitchen, eating Esme's morning leftovers. He smiled at me as I walked in. I joined him at the table, humming lightly as the smell of his food hit my sense.
"Hungry?" he asked, looking at me with a raised brow.
"Famished," I giggled, remembering Jasper using the word earlier.
"There are leftover omelets, pancakes, and bacon. Want me to heat you some up?"He started to stand, but I placed my hand on his forearm to stop him.
"Actually, I think I'm going to fix myself a sandwich. Breakfast should be eaten in the mornings," I stated seriously as I got up from the table.
"WHAT? Breakfast can be anytime," he argued, disbelief evident in his tone.
I shook my head in disagreement. Charlie and Renee had breakfast for dinner quiet often. I cooked for myself those nights or Dad would run out and grab me something. He never complained. For the most part, Charlie was a quiet guy. He and Renee were polar opposites in that respect. She never held her tongue, bought into the small town gossip, and on occasion gave them all something to talk about. Charlie could care less about any of it. With him I always felt like what he had was enough, and the rest – whatever was on the outside – didn't matter.
Alice took note that I was lost in though and nudged me with her elbow. I hadn't realized I'd been standing, staring off in space, with the refrigerator door open. Thinking about my parents spurred a wave of sadness I wasn't anticipating. The same guilt I felt the previous week over not going home washed over me, causing tears to gather in the corner of my eyes. I quickly busied myself to clear my head, making an easy chicken salad.
Jasper was finished eating long before I sat down, but waited for me patiently. He scowled as I place my plate on the table. I giggled, knowing he wished he had waited to eat. Alice sat with us, gushing over her meal. Mentally, I did a little happy dance at her praise. Once we were finished she insisted on cleaning up, saying it was only right since I cooked. I didn't argue. Being away from school and home felt like a vacation, and for the first time ever – I felt like I deserved a break. I thanked her and started to stand when Jasper placed his hand on top of mine.
"Hang on a second. I wanted to ask you something. Later today I was thinking about going over to Grandma Platt's for a visit. It's been a while since I've seen her and she lives just around the corner. Would you like to join me?"
"Grandma Platt's?" I tilted my head to the side and asked curiously. That name didn't sound familiar at all.
"My mom's mom. Esme's mom."
"Oh. Yes, of course. I would love to, Jasper." Even if I hadn't wanted to go, there was no way I could vocalize it after hearing who she was.
"You're taking her to Mama's?" Alice asked, shaking her head. There was laughter dancing in her eyes, but she didn't make a peep. "I hope you're prepared, Bella."
"What's she talking about?" I directed my question to Jasper instead of Alice because I wanted a straight forward answer. Alice could be so cryptic sometimes.
"Grandma Platt is a little different. Quite eccentric actually, but I think you'll like her. She drinks some and has varied… taste, but for the most part she's a good woman. Esme doesn't talk to her much. She can't handle the drinkin'," he said with a shrug.
I wasn't sure what to say. What did he mean by varied taste and eccentric? How eccentric? My head was telling me that I might not be ready to meet anymore of his family, but I kept my mouth shut and nodded. Something about the way Jasper described Grandma Platt intrigued me.
An hour later we were standing in her driveway. Jasper wasn't lying when he said she lived just around the corner. We walked what felt like ten steps and we were there. He took my hand and gave it a small squeeze. I looked over at him, reassuring him with my eyes that I was okay. As Jasper knocked on the door, I took a minute to survey the yard. Much like Esme's, there wasn't a thing out of place. Poinsettia's lined each side of the driveway. The grass looked freshly cut and too green for the winter. Grandma Platt's home, was smaller than the Cullen's, but not by much and the Christmas décor that adorned the outside made it feel welcoming. I didn't hear the door open, but I sure heard her. Her boisterous voice caused me to jump.
"Jasper! Oh, honey, it is good to see you," her voice was laced with sugar. I turned around to look at her, but either she was ignoring me or just hadn't noticed.
"Hi, Mama. It's good to see you, too," he said. His grip on my hand loosened and he motioned over to me before he continued, "Mama, this is my girlfriend Bella. Bella, this is my grandmother, Anne Platt."
"Girlfriend? Well she sure is pretty, Jasper," she teased, winking in my direction. "Come inside. I can't wait to get to know you, Bella. Jasper's never brought a girl home for me to harass," she laughed, I blanched. Inquisitions weren't my thing.
There were two things that caught my eye as we were led into the family room. One was the large family portrait that hung above the fire place. It looked as if it had been taken recently, but as I scanned it, I knew that wasn't a possibility. There were two girls, one maybe ten, the other no older than sixteen. The woman, the mother, was the spitting image of Esme. It had to be Grandma Platt. The man was attractive - no… beautiful. His hair was platinum blonde, his eyes bright blue, the smile he wore was bright and I could tell it was genuine. The eldest daughter held his features. Sadness washed over me when I realized Rosalie did, too. It was the first picture I had ever seen of Jasper's mother. She looked nothing like I envisioned, being Esme's sister, but she was stunning, even at such a young age.
The second thing I noticed was a young, ruggedly handsome, man sitting leisurely on the L-shaped sectional, sipping his drink (that appeared to be whiskey). My brow shot up as I turned to look at Jasper, begging for answers. He rolled his eyes and chuckled. Is he the help? I never had a housekeeper, always mowed my own lawn, and the thought of having a driver in the small town of Forks was laughable, but if indeed he was the help, the way he was lounging around, so comfortable, hardly seemed appropriate. My unanswered question was answered as I regained composure and turned around to take a seat. Grandma Platt was wrapped around him like a snake on a pole. I stared, wide eyed, causing her to laugh.
"Bella, this is my boyfriend, Eleazar. Eli, this is Jasper's… girlfriend," she paused, smirking. It seemed as though she was enjoying some sort of inside joke. "Her name is, Bella." My face had yet to return to something resembling normalcy. My jaw was nearly touching my chest and I must have forgotten to blink because my eyes began to burn.
"It is a pleasure to meet you, Bella," Eleazar said, his thick accent shining through. His face was kind and gentle. The shock of Old Lady Platt and the Hispanic McDreamy had yet to wear off, but his greeting calmed me enough to remember where I was and what the fuck I was doing there. I was ready to kill Jasper, or at least yell at him a little. He could have told me. He should have told me. I wasn't prepared.
My body language gave me away, like always, and Jasper luckily came to my rescue, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me down to sit on the couch. I wasn't quite sure what to do or say and was more than a little uncomfortable after whispering a shy "hello" to Eleazar.
After we were all situated in our seats Anne, or Mama, as she insisted I called her, proceeded to tell me the story of how she and 'Eli' met. Apparently, Grandpa Platt owned a mountain resort in greater Colorado and once he passed, she refused to sell. She did everything behind the scenes, never visited, and had never skied a day in her life. Eight years later, at the age of seventy-two, she got curious and hopped a plane to Crested Butte. Eli was her ski instructor. They laughed, remembering their time together there. Eleazar said it only took her two days to convince him to join her in New Hampshire. I wondered briefly if she still paid him a salary.
We talked some about school, and they questioned me about my family. Grandma Platt didn't even hesitate when she told me, although it wasn't any of her business, she really felt I should be with my family on Christmas. Jasper tried jumping to my defense, but I shushed him quickly. She was entitled to her opinion and I appreciated the way she spoke her mind. We heard about the upcoming trips she and Eli had planned. I guess after the great skiing adventure of '08, she found there were other extreme sports she wanted to try. She had conquered bungee jumping and soon would be parasailing. All of those things sounded fun, but definitely not safe for a woman her age.
Two hours, and three drink and/or valium offers - and declines - later, Jasper and I were walking back to the house. His arm was wrapped tight around my waist and my head rested on his chest. Neither of us had said a word since we left. The entire visit was surreal. As we neared the house, I could see people sitting outside. My entire body stiffened when I realized it was Alice and Tyler. They were sitting on the porch, her legs thrown over his, with her tiny head against his massive shoulder. Both were smiling, but something seemed… off. Seeing them side by side for the first time, I questioned if maybe Tyler was ready to end the relationship as well. I lifted my head to look at Jasper. I never wanted us to end up that way – not like Alice and Tyler, and definitely not like Grandma Platt, whose life only looked like a dream from the outside. He gave my waist a squeeze and leaned down to kiss my forehead.
"You alright?" he asked.
I nodded into his chest. "Good, just thinking."
"About?"
"Everything… us… your grandmother, Alice, I don't know. Everything." We had stopped in the street and he turned me to face him. His face warned me of his concern, but I knew he wouldn't push; he never did. There were things that Jasper and I had yet to say, even though we already knew them. I felt like it was time to vocalize, not only my love, but my worry. If I was ever going to get past my insecurities, it was necessary. My past had a lot to do the way I felt. The constant need for reassurance wasn't something that would just go away. I would need to tell Jasper a little about myself for him to understand. I only hoped I wouldn't have to reveal too much.
"Bella!" I heard Alice call me. I took a deep breath to prevent my eyes from rolling and turned around with a smile. Jasper and I needed to talk, but it would have to wait.
Unfortunately, the wait ended up being much longer than I expected.
