******************************************************************************Hey Everyone, if you still remember me then read on…..I had a death in the family and wasn't able to write for a few days, I hope you all understand. I also wanted to be sure that you all know how appreciative I am for your support on my last chapter. Thanks for the reviews and followings. I love you all so much!
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"Peeta! Oh my god! Why did you cut your arm?" Peeta is shaking, I rub his back, and try to pull the scissors from his clenched fist. "Peeta…I can't help unless you let go of the scissors and talk to me." He looks as if he hasn't slept in days. The scissors drop to the floor at once, but the shaking only worsens. He has a tight grip on my hand and when I try to pull it away, his entire body freezes. I rummage through the cabinet and find a first aid kit, I pull out all the gauze and wrap it around his arm, the cuts aren't too deep and I don't want to get a nurse and risk him having to stay in this hospital any longer then he already has been here… After seeing his leg in the hunger games, no injury of his makes me feel queasy anymore, so I can bandage it quickly and easily.
I cup my hands around his jaw, "Peeta. Why did you cut yourself?" I can barely talk for the tears streaming down my face. "I-I-I was having one of those things again." "What do you mean? An attack?" He nods without another word. "What triggered it?" "When you set Dillan down, and surrounded him with pillows…it made me think of a coffin. I had weird flashes of Snow saying that you killed our child." "She's fine Peeta. I think she's a little scared from the screams, but still. She's perfect." I kiss Peeta for a long time, it seems like it helps him to talk. "Katniss…Is Dillan okay? I didn't hurt him or you. Did I?" "No, you didn't." When I mention that, a smile sprouts across his face, it's still red from crying but he seems to be feeling better. "Are you ready to get up?" "Katniss...I love you." "I love you too Peeta, and I can tell our daughter already does as well." Peeta rests his hand on my stomach and smiles, I can feel her kick again and I smile. I hold Peeta's hand until I make him sit on the couch and then I run off to see how Dillan is doing. I pick him up and cradle him in my arms, I'm relieved to see it's not time for another diaper change, so I am able to go back and join Peeta. I walk over to the couch and flop down with two of the best children in the world.
Peeta wraps his arm around me, I look up at him and try, turn the conversation from baby coo's; to something that I need to know. "Peeta, please tell me why you cut your arm…" "I told you…an attack." He tries to brush it off as if it was nothing, really? Almost kill yourself and you act like it's a bug bite? "Peeta…an attack has never caused you to contemplate suicide before. Why did you do that this time?" His eyes look a little watery. We've been through attacks before, why is this one making you cry? I hold his hand and stare at him and hope that what he sees in my grey eyes shines through. "Because…I- I wanted to kill you. More than anything... The thought of you killing our child pushed me over the edge. I could feel it coming on so I had to snap myself out of it somehow." He hangs his head in shame and avoids contact with my eyes.
***********************************Peeta's POV****************************
I can't believe I actually told Katniss that. You just convinced her that you would never try to kill her again…of course you didn't harm her…just yourself.
"I'm not mad at you having an attack Peeta. I'm mad that you felt it necessary to cut yourself." I shake my head, "The important thing is that I didn't hurt you or our daughter." "Peeta. When you hurt yourself you hurt me. Like I said the other day…if it weren't for you, I would have already committed suicide." This is serious. She's serious? "You would have had Gale." Katniss' eyes immediately begin watering and she's dropped the grip on my hand that I love so much. I pull her close to me… "I'm sorry Kat." She wipes her nose, "No…I'm sorry I shouldn't be crying over somebody that I haven't seen in years." "No, it's okay to. What he did to you is despicable." "I hate him. I wish he had just died in the war." I nod slowly. You will kill Gale for Katniss, Real. I play with Dillan's fingers, when I hear the door open abruptly.
"I'm back!" We don't have to even turn around to know who it is. "Hey Annie." "So…How was it having a baby for a couple hours?" Katniss stares at me, and shakes her head subtly, "It was great Annie. But he did make sure to give us a gift of appreciation…" Annie cocks her head while she picks Dillan up and rests her on her hip. "He ruined his whole diaper…" Annie practically falls on the floor laughing, eyes are watering and face is more red then her hair. When she rises to her feet and catches her breath for a minute; "I thought he felt lighter!" Annie bounces him as if she's weighing in comparison, "Peeta!" She almost drops Dillan in her quick reaction, he's almost thrown right at Katniss, and Annie grabs my arm. It sends pain through my entire body. The cuts are still achy, and that's one thing I can't hide.
"Peeta! What happened?" Before she can lift the bandages I pull her hand away. "I was having an attack. I had to cut myself so I wouldn't hurt Katniss or Dillan." "Peeta…you were supposed to be cleared to go home today. You'll have to stay here for at least another week. Cutting yourself…really?" She throws my arm down and grabs Dillan and walks out of the room. Katniss stands on her toes and whispers into my ear, "Why would you tell Annie?" "She needs to know Kat. She has to know I'll do anything to save you or Dillan." Katniss shakes her head and stares at me intensely, as if she's waiting for me to say I won't cut myself again.
"Kat, I'm going to do whatever it takes to make sure I won't attack you, Dillan, our baby…or anybody really. Even if it means I cut my entire body to shreds." Katniss buries her head into my chest and I wrap my arm around her. "Annie. You don't need to tell the doctors. If anything I've found a way to keep my head cleared during an attack." Annie looks concerned, and takes a couple slow steps towards me and won't keep her eyes off my arm. "Well you can't just… cut yourself. It's not healthy. One of these times you may cut deep enough to kill yourself." "I don't have attacks that often. I'll be fine. I'm going to go get the release forums…" Annie rests her hand on my shoulder. "Peeta, I'm just trying to look out for you." She follows me out the door; right as the door clicks shut she corners me against a wall and has a serious look I've never seen Annie's face carry.
"You listen to me Peeta Mellark! You are going to be a father soon. You just regained your memory, and you're an uncle to a little boy that adores you! You can't be cutting yourself. You won't just be hurting yourself…you make one fatal cut through the gloomy hijacked eyes and you'll end up killing Katniss from the depression she'd develop, which in terms will kill your child. And you'd be leaving behind some sad friends and a depressed "nephew". Do you understand what I'm saying?" I shake my head as fast as I can manage; my throat is dry at the thought of hurting so many other people. "I-I understand…" "Now come here you idiot." Annie wraps he arms around me, "Just think about Katniss. She's your wife. She wants you alive." Annie gives me her normal happy smile and walks beside me to get the release forms. Dillan clings to my arm, until I carry him. I promise Dillan. Your uncle Peeta is done harming himself. I kiss his soft head and hold onto the clipboard with my ticket to freedom.
*********************************Katniss' POV*********************************
When I hear the door open I spring to my feet eager to know why I heard Annie yelling at. "Hey guys. Did you get the papers?" "Yep, got them right here." Peeta holds the clipboard up proudly. "No problems?" "None at all." Then why were you yelling? "Are you sure there weren't any issues. I heard Annie raise her voice…" The glare at each other for a minute… Fine! Leave me out of this, after my husband almost killed himself… I cross my arms and wait impatiently for them to stop staring at each other. "I saw a bug…I screamed when I saw it…" "Yeah! And I-I had to kill it for her! She accidently hit my arm so I winced a little bit and it soundly like her squeaky screams." "Whose scream are you calling squeaky?" Peeta elbows her... "I guess I do squeak a little…sometimes." I shake it off and walk over into Peeta's arms, This isn't over Peeta…you're gonna tell me what made Annie yell at you… he wraps it around my shoulders as he finishes the paperwork. "I can't believe we finally get to go home!" Peeta pecks me on the lips and happily hands the papers for Annie to sign and turn in.
I run over to the dresser and pull out our clothes and push them into a bag. Dillan laughs at my excitement, and helps by pulling a t-shirt on the ground in a bag. I pick him up and twirl him around in my absolute happiness, I kiss his cheek and set him back down on the bed. When I stand back up I look to the doorway and see Peeta, smiling his signature Peeta smile. He's leaning again the doorframe and laughing under his breath. "What? Baby love is funny to you?" I rest my hands under my expanded abdomen and give it a gentle shake. "No, it's not funny…But I'm in disbelief of your joy over having a baby in your arms." "Who can't love this face?" I pick Dillan up and smoosh his cheek against mine and stick my lips like Dillan is doing.
This only sends Peeta in a fit of laughter; he walks over and picks the bag up off the floor and smiles at me and walks out of the room. I carry Dillan out of the room; me and Peeta walk out of the hospital room with our finger intertwined. "Ready to go home Peeta?" "Yeah, are you?" "I know I am." Our daughter starts kicking, and Dillan pats my stomach which seems to calm her down a little, so I encourage Dillan…just this one time…to flirt with my daughter.
When I open the door I am facing some guy's chest, I look up and see the grey eyes that are unmistakable for me…after years it's almost as if time has stood still…I'm starring at the guy who used to be my friend. Who used to be the person I cared about most. The person that killed my sister… "Hey Catnip…"
******************************************************************************Hi guys! What did you think about this long awaited chapter? Hate it? Love it? Let me know in the reviews below!
And I'd like to send a quick shout-out to Taggerung: I had that planned on writing this chapter like what your guess on why Peeta cut himself was! I hope it wasn't too predictable for you… I laughed so hard when I saw your review the other day…I was like "DO I HAVE A MINDREADING REVIEWER? Hahaha Anyway…Thanks for the review, its reviewers like you that make me smile every day!
I'd still love some more name suggestions, so keep em' coming I have liked them all so far! How do you all feel about having Gale added into this fan fiction? Hate it? Love it? Anybody out there want to see Peeta beat the crud outta Gale? Let me know what you think in the reviews! I can't thank you all for the support on my story! I love you all so much! Talk to you at my next update!
~Freezethemoment
