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Okay, this is this chapter! I don't own anything except Saori and granny and my own little plot bunnies that i feed into the big plot wolfy :)

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"Huh?"

Kyouya looked mildly shocked at this (more than slightly demented) girl.

I swear though, if I was drinking something I'd have spat it out laughing, but I bit my tongue when I saw Kyouya glare at me. As much as I wanted to take a picture... it just wasn't worth my life.

Since no-one was doing anything, I cleared my throat, and motioned to the sofas.

"Why don't we all sit down and have a cup of tea... you can explain this to us then miss...?"

"Renge~"

"Miss Renge. We'll close early so it's private enough for you too explain all of this."

Myself and Haruhi walked around telling the guests that we had to leave early, sorry for the trouble, etc. After getting changed into our uniforms because they were more comfortable, we made tea for everyone (except myself, I hate the stuff. Prefer Nescafe.)

The twins were now the first to break the awkward silence that everybody but Renge noticed.

"So... this is you're fiancée Kyouya sempai?"

"Of course, my name is Renge Houshakuji, and I'm transferring into Ouran Academy's first year class A tomorrow."

We nodded and then turned to look over at Tamaki who had huddled up in a corner to sulk for a while.

"Why is he sulking?"asked Hikaru.

Kaoru snickered, "Because mommy was keeping a secret from daddy."

I had to hold back laughter as Kyouya gave the twin evils. He sighed and just mumbled "Whatever..."

A little known fact (to people not it Ouran) is that Tamaki refers to himself as the father of all the hosts... except the ones older than him. He declared that Kyouya was 'mom', most likely because Kyouya is vice-president of the host club.

I always thought he had a boy crush on Kyouya, but it's quite obvious he dotes on Haruhi.

"Why does everyone insist on referring to us like we're husband and wife?"

I grinned, "Yeah, and in that case, why do you have the female role? Tamaki is definitely more in touch with his feminine side."

I got a pair of evils from Tamaki before he whined and turned back to his corner, and the twins laughed along with me as he sulked some more. Then Renge popped up behind us, looking exceptionally scary as she went into the details of how she fell for Kyouya.

Well, she didn't look scary, but the thought of all the bullshit she came out with was.

Apparently he likes nature, because he was admiring flowers in the garden. A fact that probably only me and Tamaki know (I did some snooping around) is that Kyouya has hay fever.

She went on to say how he saved a small kitten from a tree, and laughed as it licked his face. I think all the host club know how Kyouya despises cats, he told us that when one was out in the courtyard. Apparently one bit his knuckle when he was small and he still has a scar.

"Is she serious?" the twins must have spoke what everyone was thinking.

Haruhi started smiling "Could you have the wrong person." But Renge soon jumped down her throat.

"No way! I could recognize my love anywhere!"

She carried on about how he was a gentleman who was kind to everyone and doesn't ask for anything in return, he likes solitude but sometimes he gets lonely, he has a diary in which he writes all his deep feelings and sometimes he cries at night because he is misunderstood.

Everyone else was starting to get restless, and I was wondering what the fire trucking hell she was on about.

"He looks like the star of the popular dating sim, Uki-Doki-Memorial!"

"Uki-Doki-Memorial? Isn't that the crap dating sim for people who can't get a life or a boyfriend?"

I felt about five people clap their hands over my mouth, and I mumbled an 'ow' from under them.

"Sheesh Saori, don't piss her off!" muttered Hikaru in one ear.

"Yeah, she's a nut, you don't want her to go all crazy on you, do you?" mumbled Kaoru in my other ear.

I shoved Hikaru, Kaoru, Haruhi, Mori and Honey away.

"Come on, she's obviously obsessed with this game, so much so that she thinks Kyouya is one of the characters. Get real sweety, he's not some simulated dude off a game that will be old in about six months."

I finished, and had all the shocked eyes of the host club on me, and a hurt pair of eyes staring at me.

"K-Kyouya, tell her she's wrong! She's lying!"

No-one spoke, so I just tutted and mumbled 'Otaku'. This set the twins and Tamaki off screaming. Mori looked indifferent and Kyouya looked like everything had just dawned upon him.

"I get it now, you're in love with that character. You're projecting that love onto me and you somehow deluded yourself into thinking we're engaged. I assume this Miyabe character wears glasses as well."

We all turned to look at him.

"So she made it up? You're not really her fiancée right?" asked a very confused Tamaki.

"Well no. I don't remember ever asking for her hand in marriage. Besides, this is the first time I've ever met the woman."

"Well you know Kyouya, you could have said so sooner." I snapped.

"The thought really didn't occur to me."

I rolled my eyes... riiight...

* * *

It took about half an hour for her to find out that Kyouya was the director of the club, managing the finances for the club and being the boss on the sly.

Then she sent us spiraling when she declared that she wanted to be the lady manager of the host club.

Tamaki looked as if he was about to ask Kyouya if he could change Renge's mind, but Kyouya cut him short.

"Miss Houshakuji is the only daughter of a very important Ootori family client. So please be polite and try not to offend her in any way. That goes for all of you." he looked at me directly, and I caught the warning glare in his eyes

"Fine..." I mumbled. I didn't want to get in a fight with Kyouya.

Range giggled "Well boys, and girl, I can't wait to work with you~"

* * *

It was time for a meeting. Tamaki was going through everything he wanted to do next week, then he randomly brought up the 'Lady Manager' topic.

"I was thinking about it a lot last night, and maybe having a lady manager wouldn't be so bad."

"Uhh what?"

"Why do you say that?" asked the twins

"Well it's fairly obvious isn't it? Renge just transferred into the same class as Haruhi, so if Haruhi has a girlfriend, it could bring out the feminine side in her. Renge's girlish air of tenderness might be able to stimulate Haruhi's own sense of femininity."

"Good grief" groaned Haruhi.

"Tamaki, don't you think I'm a good enough female role model for Haruhi?" I asked, kind of hurt that he'd just overlook me like that.

"Well, at first I did consider asking you to be more feminine with Haruhi. But since I found out you wear boxers, I couldn't possibly let you two spend more than club time together."

I started laughing, come on! We spent a lot of time together considering the fact that we walk to school together, we walk home together and we have actually had a sleepover (shock horror, I know).

"Now Renge is here we can finally help Haruhi get in touch with her feminine side! This is a very important project men! She doesn't have any friends in class except these two shady twins! That's no good for her."

The twins cocked their heads and gave Tamaki a look.

"Like you have room to talk."

Tamaki completely ignored the twins' comment, and turned to face me. One word crossed my mind.

Help.

"And Saori, since you lack in feminine qualities, you can spend time with Renge and Haruhi! You could all have quality bonding time all together!"

I was about to reject the whole idea, but Haruhi gave me a pleading look. I figured, if she has to go through this, then she should have some company. Who wants to be tortured by a chestnut haired devil on their own?

Just then Renge walked into the room.

Speak of the devil and she shall appear, huh?

"Hi everyone! You'll be happy to know that your new manager Renge has baked you all some cookies!"

Tamaki started gushing over how ladylike Range was, baking cookies for us all, until she put him down and called him phony again.

We all went to try the cookies as Renge went into her 'Virtual Kyouya World'. I didn't find them too bad, a little burnt, but the texture was okay, so was the taste. Haruhi agreed with me, but when Honey (the sweety king, as I named him once) tried one, he started to say that they were really burnt and didn't taste good. Mori, like the over protective cousin he is, jumped in.

"Mitsukuni, don't eat that, it's bad for you."

Range heard this, and pretty much freaked out.

"Run Mori, run!" I shouted with the twins, and we laughed as Mori scooped up Honey and ran across the room.

After laughing for a bit we tired of hearing Honey yell that Renge was scaring him.

I picked up another cookie and started munching on it. Haruhi picked another one up too. When she bit into it, she got crumbs on her cheek, I started chuckling at her.

"You've got more of the cookie on your face than in your mouth."

Hikaru and Kaoru picked up on this, so Hikaru bit half the cookie of when it was still in her mouth, and Kaoru licked the crumbs off her face.

Tamaki (obviously) saw this, and went mad.

"Did you see what they just did? He took a bite of the cookie while it was in her mouth..."

He went on rambling, I ignored him and walked away to trip Range up while she was on her fifth lap of the room chasing the third years.

I let Mori and Honey pass, then I stuck out my leg just as Renge took a step forward. However, she saw it, and hopped over my leg, but she slipped and crashed into a couch just ahead of her.

I clapped a hand to my mouth, and stepped forward to see if she was still alive.

I muttered to myself.

"Crap."