Okay, I am cruel and evil, I know. Please don't shoot me. Also please don't shoot me because I'm leaving for Chicago on Thursday and won't be free again until next Sunday night, so I probably won't be updating again (this or Through the Cracks) for another week. I am so, so sorry, but this one is REALLY LONG and REALLY HAPPY so hopefully that makes up for it...? (fingers crossed)

Note: Evilly is a word, in case you were wondering. I didn't think so, either, but apparently it is.

Chapter Nineteen

Fiore Towers Apartment Building

#39 West 45th Street

At first, Rose panicked. She had no idea what day it was or what time or even where she was, and she had absolutely no recollection of falling asleep on a couch, with Jack in her arms no less. The sun was already peeking in brightly through the windows, which somehow reminded her that it was a weekday and that she should probably be well on her way to school right now. Shit, she was in trouble. Jack was still fast asleep, and as Rose tried to manoeuvre around him, her hands somehow managed to land on her stomach. Then she remembered.

She had a doctor's appointment this morning- her very first doctor's appointment, too. All of a sudden, the gaps in Rose's memory were filled, but she was too excited to give them a second thought. She tried to wake up Jack as gently as possible, but her shaking hands didn't do a very good job. Jack jolted from his sleep and rubbed his eyes, looking as puzzled as Rose had felt moments ago.

"Whs goinon?" he muttered, sitting up and raising a tired eyebrow at Rose, who in his opinion was far too happy for such an ungodly hour. "What time is it?" he asked, speaking coherently now but still sounding groggy.

"Umm… it's ten after eight," Rose replied, having already almost danced her way into the kitchen to look at the clock. Much to his confusion, he heard banging coming from her general direction, as though she was ripping apart the entire kitchen, and with a vengeance. There was an immeasurable amount of questions running through Jack's mind, most of which involved why in the world Rose was attacking the kitchen. Then, as though she could read his mind, she shouted to be heard over the noise, "I have a doctor's appointment today, remember?" There was a loud, distinctive crash and then, "Jack, where the hell is the toaster?"

With a tired sigh, Jack pulled himself of the coach and, still rubbing his eyes and walking a bit like Frankenstein, he made his way into the kitchen that Rose had thoroughly destroyed during her search for the toaster. He bent down beside her stuck his hand way into the back of the cupboard, but just when he had found it buried under a bunch of pots and a box of stale cereal, Rose jumped up from the ground and bolted off towards the hallway. It only took Jack about a couple of seconds to realize why, and when he did he followed her into the bathroom.

This was only Rose's third day living with Jack (although it felt like it had been much longer), and because he'd been at work it was his first time experiencing morning sickness with her. He didn't really know what he was supposed to do or say as he sat there watching her throw up what little remained in her stomach from last night, because he was really scared to make her angry or something like that. When he called Mr. Cartmell last night to ask for the night off, the first thing his boss had told him after congratulating the couple was that he would have to be very wary about what he did and said around Rose for the next nine months, because pregnancy had been known to make 'psycho bitches out of even the best of women.' Those were Mr. Cartmell's words, not Jack's. He did the best he could, holding her hair and rubbing her back in circles, which was what he vaguely remembered his mother doing for him when he was little and had the flu.

Jack had always prided himself on having a stomach of steel, ever since the time when he was thirteen and he and his friend David had eaten the two-week old pizza that had been under David's bed without his knowing it. David ended up getting sick, but Jack did not. Still, one thing he could never handle very well was other people throwing up, although he didn't know why. Every time Rose's shoulders heaved in his arms, Jack felt his stomach turn over slightly. Finally, after what felt like years, Rose wiped her mouth with a clammy, shaking hand and looked up at Jack.

"Sorry about that," she said quietly, laughing in spite of herself.

"No need to apologize," he assured her, helping her up and allowing her to steady herself. Then, against his better judgement, he asked, "How long is this supposed to last for?... Because you know I hate seeing you suffer like that." Yeah, that last bit was sort of a desperate attempt not to get her too angry.

As Rose tied her hair back with an elastic that was around her wrist, she replied, "Three months. Which means only about two months and three weeks left."

Jack laughed, but inside he thought that he might not be able to last that long. On top of that, he didn't want Rose to be doing this on her own every morning for the next three months. Next Saturday when he dropped Rose off at the Cartmells', he thought that he might see if he couldn't switch shifts with one of the day guys.

"Do you still want to eat, Rose?" he asked. He didn't realize what a dumb question that was until it was already out. Rose's answer echoed his thoughts.

"I have to," she explained. "I'm actually supposed to be eating for two, you know. So I can't exactly starve myself. But I think I'm going to call the school first."

Jack and Rose walked back into the kitchen, were Rose sat down and began dialling her school's familiar number. She'd been nervous about this for the last three days, knowing that if she couldn't manage to pull of her mother's voice well enough to make up for the fact that the number she was calling from wasn't the one in the school directory, she'd be in deep trouble. Aside from whatever the consequences might be, she would also have to explain why she'd taken the morning off, which for obvious reasons she wasn't exactly looking forward to. Plus, they would call her mother. Then imagine what would happen! She could not let it get that far.

When the monotone, automatic message voice instructed her to press 2 for the attendance office, Rose's hands shook with fear. She felt like she might throw up again as the same voice said, "You have reached the York Preparatory School attendance office. Please leave a message after the tone."

It would be five seconds before she heard the beep that signalled her to deliver her message- it always had been. In those five seconds, she managed to look up at Jack hopefully, who flashed her an encouraging smile and a thumbs-up. It was as though he was saying, 'You can do it, Rose! You can mimic your mom's snobby, posh, bitchy voice just fine. I know you can.' She almost laughed at that, but the humour was cut short by the message tone. The moment of truth.

For a moment, Rose completely forgot how to speak. Somehow, she managed to choke out, "Hello, this is Ruth DeWitt Bukater calling to inform you that my daughter, Rose DeWitt Bukater will be absent this morning because she has a doctor's appointment. She should return to school after lunch."

Was that okay? Should she have said more? Less? It didn't really matter, because the machine cut out a few seconds later. There was nothing left to do but go on with her day and hope for the best.

"How was I?" she asked Jack hesitantly. The slightly comical look on his face made her fear the worst.

Very smugly, as though Jack was proud that he had such a scheming girlfriend, Jack replied, "You were absolutely wonderful. You sounded just like her!"

"That's a scary thought!" Rose joked, although inside she was thrilled that she'd pulled it off. Now that that ordeal was over with, she could comfortable go on with her day. Opening the fridge and popping some bread into the toaster that Jack had managed to drag out while she was on the phone, Rose wondered what was going to happen at the hospital today. It occurred to her that she had absolutely no idea what happened during these doctor's appointments, only that she had to go every month and that there would probably be a blood test involved.

Rose cringed at the thought of having a needle stuck into her arm. When she was thirteen, her father had noticed that she was chronically tired and suggested that they make a doctor's appointment. That was the first time she'd ever had blood drawn, and unfortunately it would not be the last. The results showed that her haemoglobin was at a staggeringly low level of 4.3, which meant that she spent the next three years getting blood taken first every six months, then once a year. Last year when the tests came back, her iron count had finally stayed in the normal range for more than a year, which had filled Rose's head with thoughts of being done with needles for a long, long time. Evidently, that wasn't how it was going to work out.

Jack poured himself a bowl of the stale cereal he'd found blocking the toaster and sat down across from Rose. He was equally excited about this appointment, and maybe a little bit more so because he wasn't the one that had to be prodded with needles. Jack didn't know all too much about what went on medically while a woman was pregnant either, but he could imagine some of the tests that would be done and he couldn't help but cringe when he imagined Rose going through them. He knew that, with an ultrasound for one, they made you drink a whole bunch of water then didn't let you go to the bathroom, which in his opinion was cruel and unusual punishment. And that was just the tip of the iceberg. Picturing Rose being poked and prodded with a whole host of medical tools made his stomach turn over and was almost enough to suck all the joy out what should be a magical moment for first time parents.

Pushing those thoughts to the back of his mind, Jack looked up at Rose and asked, "What time is our appointment at?"

"Ten o'clock," she replied after swallowing a tiny bite of toast.

"Right. Then I think that once you're done eating, you should shower right away because I know you'll take a lot longer than I will. We're going to want to be out of here by about twenty after nine, because the hospital is about a twenty-minute cab ride from here. Okay?"

As Jack spoke, the words started to fall from his lips faster and faster until Rose could barely understand them. She had to try as hard she could not to laugh at him, because he was so evidently nervous. But then that was a good thing, wasn't it? Natural, even? Hopefully his nerves would be calmed down by the time their appointment was over, and if not Rose had read somewhere years ago that a woman becomes a mother the moment she finds out she's pregnant, whereas a man becomes a father the first time he hears the baby's heartbeat. In her opinion, Jack was already an amazing dad, but maybe he hadn't fully realized yet that the thing inside of Rose was a child, not a time bomb. He would get over his nerves soon enough.

"Okay," she replied simply, knowing it would annoy him to no end.

"Okay then," Jack said, fidgeting a bit in his seat. "Cause you know, we don't want to-"

"Jack!" Rose exclaimed, cutting him off halfway through his sentence. She was biting hard on the inside of her cheek just to keep herself from falling out of her chair with laughter. It was kind of funny because Jack hadn't seemed nervous about the baby at all until today. Maybe he was one those people that just didn't like doctors in general. "Calm down! Why are you so nervous? Everything's gonna be okay?" she said, taking his hand in hers.

Jack shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly, shaking his hair out of his eyes. Rose vaguely wondered how long it had been since he'd had a haircut and though that he might need to get one soon… not that his hair wasn't cute long, but it was starting to get in his way.

"I'm excited, Rose, don't think I'm not," he explained. "I was just thinking about all that stuff you said last night you had a real good point… I mean, I dunno how well we can do this, Rose. We don't have the money to get a bigger place, and you're right; we can't raise a kid here. What the hell are we gonna do, Rose?"

The honest truth was that she didn't know. She didn't know at all, and it was all she'd been thinking about for the last week. The thing was though that she wanted, just for this one day, to put all of the scary stuff out of her mind and let her pregnancy be the rewarding, special and intimate experience that it was supposed to be. Rose understood totally what Jack was saying, because it was exactly what she'd said yesterday afternoon, but she wanted more than anything to ignore it just for a few hours. Listening to Jack express her own fears, however, made her realize that she couldn't hide her emotions behind the façade of a family life that was not their own. Rose suddenly appeared very tired as she ran her hands through her hair and sighed.

"I don't know Jack," she whispered. "You're absolutely right, we've got no idea, but let's just… let's save this for some other time, okay? I'm going to have a shower and then I want to get out of here as soon as possible."

Out of the apartment, out of the whole situation… it was the same thing, wasn't it? As long as though could go hang out with an OB/GYN and pretend to be the happy couple who was more than ready for their wonderful little blessing, everything would be alright. Wouldn't it?

Rose kissed Jack on the cheek and showered as quickly as she possibly could. When she got out, Jack took the bathroom while she dressed. Everything was sort of mindless… get dressed, brush your hair, brush your teeth… things that people do without even thinking about it. Until now, Rose had though she fully understood how she felt about the whole thing. She was nervous and worried, of course, because she knew that in their current state she and Jack couldn't support a baby, but at the same time she was thrilled and excited to raise the baby. Before this morning, those two very different feelings had been able to coexist peacefully with each other, but all of a sudden she couldn't make heads or tails of it. Maybe until this morning she had though that Jack could be her rock and help her through it, but it was as though his nervousness had completely destroyed her. When they were finally ready to get going, Rose felt so worried and uncomfortable that she couldn't even stand still. She felt like throwing up, but it had nothing to do with her pregnancy.

Rose and Jack got on a subway bound for the Manhattan Metropolitan Hospital, clasping each other's hands for dear life. Both of them racked their brains for a way to ignore the frightened tension between them.

"What's our doctor's name again, Rose?" Jack asked, trying to make his eyes look really inquisitive and interested.

Reaching into her purse for the piece of paper Leslie had given them three days ago, Rose replied, "Her name is Jennifer DiLaudo. It says here she's been an OB/GYN for more than ten years, and she has a lot of experience with teen pregnancies." When she finished reading, Rose flashed a massively fake smile at Jack, and it struck her that she had once smiled the exact same smile at Cal. That worried her. It had nothing to do with her love for Jack, because that was unquestionable. It meant that she was pretending to be okay when she wasn't, and Rose hated that. She wanted to be okay… she wanted everything to be okay.

Jack must have sensed that Rose was really uncomfortable, because he didn't talk the rest of the way. When the bus stopped two blocks from the hospital, they got off quickly and quietly and battled the cold wind in silence, both of them knowing that once inside the hospital they could play pretend and let everything be fine and dandy again. Finally, when they walked inside of the massive building and felt the warm air coming from the vents caressing them, it was as though everything was normal.

"It says here that the maternity ward is on the sixth floor," Rose explained, heading towards the elevators. Her fingers were still laced through Jack's, but now she loosened her grip on them and allowed herself to smile now. It was okay now. Anyone who saw them without getting a real good look at their faces would think that they were any other happy couple who'd found themselves expecting a little miracle. The other women- the ones farther along- would smile at her and tell her how much fun she was going to have. It was okay.

The elevator grinded to a halt and Rose felt her stomach turn over. When she was little she used to love elevators- she had loved to jump as they stopped so that she would hover in mid-air for a minute. That changed when she was fifteen and got stuck in one for forty minutes. Now she got claustrophobic just stepping inside the tiny little room, and it especially bothered her when the elevator stopped because she was afraid the doors wouldn't open. Of course they did, and she and Jack stepped out into the hallway of the maternity floor.

Being there was completely surreal. Every single woman in the waiting room looked to Rose like they were nine months pregnant, but some were bigger than others. It was really weird to imagine herself ever looking like that- what would people think as she walked through the hallways? How embarrassing would it be for people to have to part for her like the Red Sea? She shuddered at the thought of it and immediately pushed it into the back of her mind.

As weird as it was, Rose liked everything about the maternity ward. Somehow, as though some divine power knew that she needed some good vibes about this whole pregnancy situation, every single woman that was there had a man with her; a man who was probably going to be an excellent father to his son or daughter someday very soon. Well, maybe, but not as good as Jack, she thought to herself. That was one thing this kid had going for them: no matter what else happened, he or she was going to have the best daddy on the planet. Rose only hoped she could be as good of a parent as she knew Jack would be.

Jack and Rose still had fifteen minutes until their appointment, so they sat down in the waiting area, where Rose immediately picked up a magazine and started leafing through it. It was really quite boring, but at least it was better than sitting there doing nothing. A few minutes that felt like an eternity passed by, and after a wall Rose felt Jack's hand grab onto hers protectively. More than protectively even- it actually kind of hurt. Her gaze shot up to Jack's eyes, but he wasn't looking at her. Instead, his eyes rested on a woman across the aisle from them. She had dark hair and looked to be about thirty, and was eyeing Rose with evident displease. Judging her… Scrutinizing her… like an insect.

Rose was indescribably hurt, especially because it wasn't like she had done anything that woman herself probably hadn't. There were girls her age and younger jumping in bed with every guy they dated- they just all had the fortune not to have gotten pregnant. Maybe Rose had made a mistake, sleeping with Jack so early and so young, but she knew she loved him and she wouldn't undo it for the world. Why is it that everyone knows full well their teenage daughters are sleeping around and couldn't care less, but as soon as one of them gets pregnant, it's like the end of the world.

Not knowing quite what to do, Rose did exactly what Jack was- staring straight at the woman until she stopped. She tried her best to kind of glare at her evilly, like she would at somebody who was torturing their pet dog. Sure enough, it took only a second for the bitch to look back down at the magazine in her hands and pretend like nothing had ever happened. Wonderful.

None too soon, the receptionist called out Rose's name and she and Jack approached her desk.

"Dr. DiLaudo will be seeing you in room 608," she explained with a smile. "That's just down the hall. You can wait there once we're finished here. Can I see your health card?"

Rose took the card out of her wallet and handed it to the receptionist, who typed something into a computer then handed Rose some forms to fill out… name, birth date, insurance, all that good stuff. It struck Rose then that right now she had no means of medical coverage. Damn, this was going to be an expensive baby. Don't think like that, she reminded herself. Everything will be okay.

"Perfect!" the woman said, taking the papers from Rose and putting them inside a folder. "Room 608 is the fifth door on the left. Dr. DiLaudo should be with you in a few minutes."

Rose thanked the receptionist and followed Jack into the office. They sat down in those stupid, uncomfortable, plastic school chairs that Rose personally thought were medieval torture devices How the hell did they expect pregnant women to sit in those stupid things? It couldn't possibly be good for an unborn baby.

"Are you nervous?" Jack asked, stroking Rose's hand gently. She giggled in spite of herself at the first time Jack had ever said that to her, and what it had been about. That surprised her, because she'd never really thought those kinds of things before. She had to remind herself that there was a difference in having a dirty mind and thinking about the person you loved that way… cause there was, right?

Smiling flirtatiously and hoping he, too, would remember, she shook her head and replied, "Not at all. Just excited… excited to have this baby with you."

Jack laughed and gave her a peck on the cheek. "Just don't be in too much of a hurry to get that kid out of you. She does have like eight more months to go."

Rose said nothing, but Jack's reference to their baby as a girl again didn't slip her mind. Secretly Rose hoped for a girl, but she would love her child no matter what its gender was. Just then, the door knob turned and a blonde woman walked into the room.

"Good morning," she said, in an almost sing-song voice. Dr. DiLaudo appeared to be in her mid-thirties, but with the spirit and enthusiasm of a woman much, much younger. She hadn't really thought about it before, but now Rose realized how thankful she was to have a female obstetrician. "I'm Jennifer DiLaudo. You two must be Rose and Jack!"

Jack nodded and extended his hand to the doctor. Rose did the same. "That'd be us," he replied. "It's nice to meet you."

Dr. DiLaudo sat down in her own stupid, plastic school chair and took Rose's chart out of the folder she held in her hands. Although she didn't know why, Rose felt instantly as though she could trust Dr. DiLaudo. There was something about the way she smiled at them as though they were old friends, and in the gentle way that she flipped through the pages in her folder that screamed trustworthy. Thank goodness.

"Alright," she began, resting her hands on her lap and looking back up at Jack and Rose. "First things first, Rose. Your chart here says you figure you're about five weeks pregnant. Is that right?"

Rose knew that wasn't what she'd written on the form. Confused, she replied, "Umm… I think I wrote three weeks if I'm not mistaken." Actually, she knew she'd written down three weeks, and she wasn't mistaken.

Dr. DiLaudo nodded and chuckled slightly. "You're right, Rose. That's what you wrote, but the questionnaire asked you how long it's been since the instance of sexual intercourse. So technically you're three weeks pregnant, but in the medical world we measure pregnancy from the date of your last menstrual period, so about five weeks."

"Oh, well that makes sense. That'd be about right." Rose said. Well, it made sense to her, anyways. It didn't go unnoticed though that Jack had began to shuffle nervously in his seat. Rose could easily understand that this probably wasn't his favourite topic under the sun. If the doctor's questions stayed along these lines, it was going to be all she could do not to burst out laughing. Boys really never grow up, do they?

Dr. DiLaudo nodded and scribbled something down in her folder. "I'm just writing down everything you say," she explained, "so that the hospital can keep track of your pregnancy in case anything goes wrong. Now, I've got a couple of questions for you two- well, mostly for you, Rose- and then we're going to do a blood test to check for anaemia, hepatitis, HIV, syphilis and rubella, and to confirm how far along you are. So, it says here you're seventeen?"

Rose tried to focus on the questions, but all of those diseases the doctor had just named sent shivers down her spine. She couldn't have any of them, could she? "That's right," she replied, trying to hide the quiver in her voice.

"Okay," Dr. DiLaudo said, smiling in a weird sort of way that Rose didn't quite know how to take. She squeezed Jack's hand for what had to be the millionth time that day. "Now, it's really not my place, but I would feel bad not asking… do you two have a plan for raising this child?"

Rose closed her eyes for a moment, trying to gather her composure. This time around, the person asking the questions really did have her best interests at heart. Still, it was difficult to shake that paranoid feeling, as though everyone was looking at her the same way as the woman out in the waiting room. "We're working on that," she said. "No need to worry though. We'll be okay."

Dr. DiLaudo smiled and nodded, looking as though she really did believe what Rose had said. "I'm sure you will be. Alright, so I've got a few questions here. I'm giving you fair warning now, Jack… you might not like a some of these questions, so you're welcome to leave the room if you want. You feeling up to it?"

Jack nodded, not at all to Rose's surprise. She knew well enough by now that Jack was the type of person who wanted to be beside her through this entire process, even if it meant reliving eighth grade sex education. "I'm sure I'll survive."

"Okay then," the doctor said, not missing a beat. "What was the first day of your last menstrual period?"

Rose racked her brain for what she would thought not a month ago to have been such trivial information. Sometime around the end of August… it was written on her calendar and everything…

"August 31st," she said, after finally remembering which date had a big red circle around it. She hadn't seen that calendar in four days now, and she wasn't going to see it again. It was the little things like that that made her realize just how far she was from everything she'd ever known.

Dr. DiLaudo scribbled that information down on Rose's chart and Jack looked down and fiddled with his thumbs. As hard as she tried not to, Rose cracked a huge smile and had to suppress the urge to laugh. She hadn't thought about how awkward this must be for the dad.

"And how long does your complete cycle usually last?" she asked.

"Twenty-seven days," Rose replied quickly. That much she knew off the top of her head, and she kind of wanted to get this over with as fast as possible for Jack's sake, who by the way was now flushing a deep red colour and chewing on his lip, still staring at the ground. In a way she felt really bad for him, but at the same time she didn't understand why guys were so immature about this stuff. She wouldn't be acting like that if they were discussing the male reproductive system.

Dr. DiLaudo smiled and said directly to Jack, "You can relax now. We're done talking about periods," which was an obvious joke intended to make him even more squeamish.

"Lovely," Jack said, rolling his eyes. Rose repeated the gesture, but directed it at him instead.

"Okay, I'm going to wager a guess that you haven't been pregnant before, am I right?" Dr. DiLaudo asked. "I only say that because after the first, the dad usually gets used to that line of questioning."

Rose laughed out loud, so glad that her doctor had a sense of humour. "You're absolutely right, Doctor. This is our first."

She smiled and wrote it down on the chart. By this point Rose really didn't know what she'd been so nervous about- everything was going just beautifully, and she had to admit, it was fun to watch Jack squirm like a little boy.

Brushing her hair behind her ear, Dr. DiLaudo asked, "Do you have any medical conditions we should be aware of?"

"I was anaemic up until last year…" Rose explained, shuttering at the thought because it reminded her of needles. "I mean, anaemia doesn't go away, but you know what I mean. My counts are all good last time I checked."

"Okay," Dr. DiLaudo said with a slight nod, "but pregnancy can make your haemoglobin counts plummet, because you're sharing nutrients with the baby. How often are you taking an iron supplement?"

"I've been taking on every night with a multivitamin," Rose explained.

"Well, after we see the results of the blood test, I might recommend that you take one in the morning as well. If your haemoglobin is above eleven we'll leave it as it is for now, but you're still going to have to be very careful and very watchful." She turned to Jack and said, "If you notice Rose getting tired or sluggish, or if her complexion becomes pale and lacklustre, I want you to make sure you schedule another appointment with me straight away, okay Jack?"

Jack nodded, with something resembling fierce determination in his eyes. It warmed Rose heart to know he cared that much about her. She'd been living with anaemia for what felt like all her life and she knew that, under normal circumstances anyway, it was no big deal. Still, if Jack wanted to fight it like it was the monster under the bed of a six year old, then she wasn't going to stop him. She felt the oddest longing to kiss him full on the mouth right then and there, but of course she didn't.

Dr. DiLaudo asked the couple a few more questions, mostly about diseases and blood and the like. They all made Rose really nervous, although not nearly as nervous as she was when they followed the doctor's lead into the laboratory. Jack must have heard her taking deep, long breaths to steady herself because he put a gentle hand on her shoulder and said, "It's okay, sweetheart. You can do it. It's just like a bee sting."

"Right," Rose replied, although that meant nothing to her because she'd never been stung by a bee before. People had been telling her that forever, but it wasn't like they had to get blood taken every six months.

Dr. DiLaudo held the door open for Rose and Jack, who again took a seat in stupid, plastic school chairs. Dr. DiLaudo began to explain something to Rose, but she cut her off.

"Sorry for being disrespectful," she explained, "but I really don't even want to know what you're doing. Just stick the thing in me and get it over with, please."

Rose closed her eyes and felt the familiar rubber band being tied around the thickest part of her arm. She felt the familiar sensation of thin fingers rubbing the inside of her elbow in search of the vein, and smelled the familiar scent of rubbing alcohol being dabbed on the spot. Finally, she felt the familiar grip of Jack's warm hand in her free one, and she squeezed it tightly as the needle pierced through her skin. The further in it went, the tighter she squeeze her eyes shut and the tighter she held onto Jack's hand. She hated the way she was able to feel it every time a new vial was put in. It seemed like it took a thousand years to fill five, but when Rose finally felt all of the tension release as the needle was pulled out of the crook of her arm, it was as though she could breathe again.

"Thank God that's over!" she exclaimed, wrapping her arms around Jack. "God, that hurt."

Dr. DiLaudo laughed and said, "I've gotta say, Rose, you actually handled that pretty well considering how small your veins are. It was really difficult to prick the right place, and most people only need four vials taken. Since your veins are so small, though, I had no choice but to use more of the smaller vials. You did a great job, Rose."

Rose breathed a huge sigh of relief that the hardest part was now over. All they had left to do was wait for the results, which Dr. DiLaudo promised wouldn't take more than a half hour. Alone inside the office, Jack and Rose talked about everything and nothing at the same time. All of a sudden, a though struck Rose and she couldn't keep it contained.

"I know it's early," she said, "but I was wondering… have you thought about names at all?"

Jack shrugged. "Not really, to be honest. I've always thought Victoria was a pretty name for a girl, and I think that, if he's a boy, we could name him after your dad and my dad… if that's okay with you." Then, as an afterthought, "My dad's name was Callaghan."

Rose thought that was a wonderful idea. Her dad's name was Connor, and she didn't really want their son to have two C names, but he could be Callaghan Thomas, which was her father's middle name. And it was an amazing coincidence that Jack liked the name Victoria, because that was the name she had picked out for a girl back when she was eleven.

"I really like that," she said, just as Dr. DiLaudo rejoined them in her office. She didn't look upset or frightened, which Rose took as a good sign.

"Alright," she said, sitting down in front of Jack and Rose. "I have good news and I have okay news. The good news is that you're definitely pregnant. Your bhCG levels, which stands for beta human chorionic gonadotropin and is basically the hormone that detects pregnancy, is at 528, which is exactly where it should be and suggests that you're about five weeks along, which means that your due date is approximately June 8th."

Dr. DiLaudo paused in her speech, as though she'd practiced this a million times, which gave Jack and Rose a moment to embrace each other. For some reason, Rose felt tears brimming behind her eyes and struggled to keep them back. June 8th, 2011… that was the day she was going to hold her baby in her arms. That was the day she was going to kiss its head and wrap it in blankets and nurse it and coddle it and absolutely love it to bits. Well, she already loved the baby to bits, but once he or she was born it was going to be so much more real.

"More good news," Dr. DiLaudo continued, "is that all of your tests came back 100% fine except for the haemoglobin. It's at six, which is really low. I'm going to have you take two pills a day instead of one and see how that works out. I'm also going to schedule another appointment for one month from today, and at that point we'll do your first ultrasound."

Rose and Jack thanked Dr. DiLaudo then made their way outside. So her iron was low. Big deal. It was always low. That wasn't what mattered. What mattered was that in nine months, she and Jack were going to finally be holding their little Victoria or Callaghan in their arms and kissing their head and touching their delicate little face. Plus, in a month from now they were going to see their baby for the first time and hear its heart beat. Now more than ever before, she truly felt like a mother.

"You know what, Rose?" Jack said as they stepped outside, wrapping his arm around her waist. "I love you so much."

This time, as he kissed her, she couldn't stop the tears from rolling down her cheeks.