I lied! This isn't the last chapter! –ducks as a myriad of plushies, flaming cookies, and random sharp objects are chucked at her- Gah! It was originally supposed to be the last chapter, but when I wrote it all out, it was ridiculously long. So I broke it into two chapters. Please don't kill me.
The good news is, you'll have the last chapter much sooner than usual, because it's already written. Again, please don't kill me. If you do, you'll never know how it ends! Bwa ha ha!
Writing works in such funny ways for me. I update a fic, think to myself that I don't have to worry about a new chapter for a good little bit, several months pass, and then I just suddenly get the urge to update. 24 hours later, a new chapter is ready. Imagine if I had the urge to write all the time. I'd update every other day. But then, I'd have to never work or go to school in order to accomplish that, so don't hold your breath, my darlings.
I dedicate this fic, in its entirety, to my lovely and vivacious roommate, Sora-chan, and her fiancée, Tsumi-chan. May their footsteps forever dance together, though they may never form circles large enough to encompass such perfect love and companionship. Merry wishes to their future wedding! November 23rd is the date.
Habitual Infatuation .:. Chapter Ten
Kakashi could not stop himself from giggling. The chuckle started low in his throat, soft and breathy. It ignited a little spark of excitement within him, a bud that only blossomed when he was up to his most complex and intriguing schemes. The excitement bubbled quickly up into his throat, turning the low chuckle into a steady guffaw, adding pitch that rose and rose until he found himself… giggling.
Shamelessly.
Like a little, rosy-cheeked girl.
Kakashi hadn't had an intrigue this good in years. Nothing like forbidden love to really brighten your decade.
He'd returned to the little love-nest his male students had made several hours earlier, dragging a frazzled, huffing Sakura along with him. Much as the pink-haired kunoichi wanted to see her "darling love Sasuke-kun" again, she was going to miss the peace and quiet that came from being far away from "that obnoxious, hyper-active blond." Kakashi had sent up a little prayer before returning that the boys would have enough common sense not to expose Sakura to anything indecent upon their return. There was no knowing exactly how Sakura would react to learning her precious Sasuke-kun had deigned to bed with Naruto.
Fortunately, there was no cause for alarm. Kakashi and Sakura returned to a campsite so immaculate, there was no telling anything had gone on in it other than a few hours of sleep. Sasuke and Naruto did not even share a look between them as they trained on the far side of the clearing, each on an opposite side with their eyes focused on a different set of trees: launching weapons into particular branches with pinpoint precision in order to improve their aim. Neither ninja seemed to even notice the return of their teacher and teammate until Sakura catapulted herself full-force into Sasuke's back, trapping the black-haired boy in a hug so tight it must have knocked the wind from his lungs.
Only then did Kakashi spot the faintest trace of the passion he'd seen earlier from the boys. Naruto heard the commotion, glanced over, and in a fraction of a second allowed his face to darken in a telltale look of jealousy and possession. Only Kakashi was quick enough to catch the change in expression before Naruto went back to his practice, stiff-backed and putting considerably more force into his throws. A second later, Kakashi watched as Sasuke darted a nervous look over at Naruto whilst simultaneously attempting to throw Sakura from his back.
That was all the proof Kakashi needed to convince himself that he hadn't imagined the encounter he'd walked in on before. His students were most certainly lovers, and they most certainly had no idea what to do with themselves.
The uncertainty between them was clear. If Naruto really felt he had a claim on Sasuke, or that their relationship was acceptable, he would have marched right over to Sakura and found new holsters for the kunai clenched tightly in his fists. But the tanned boy did nothing, pretending to ignore the muffled shouts that Kakashi knew he could easily hear.
As for Sasuke, Kakashi knew that after having professed his love for Naruto—publicly, honestly, and unrequitedly—the proud Uchiha would not say another word about the subject unless Naruto brought it up himself. And even then it would be difficult to get the prideful ninja to make another such blatant show of emotion. Sasuke would consider it shameful to chase after the blond like a love-sick puppy, regardless of how either of them felt.
Kakashi felt the giggle rising up in him again. This was beyond perfect. Evil as it was, the sensei could think of nothing he'd rather do with his time than mercilessly manipulate the hormone-driven feelings of his unwitting students. What a beautiful mess this was going to be before the end.
Kakashi put two fingers to his lips and gave a shrill whistle. Instantly, he had the undivided attention of his three students. In a flash of chakra and ninja agility, all three appeared a few feet before him, their faces alert and tilted up towards him. The façade of innocence he saw in one pair of blue eyes and one pair of black nearly made him start chuckling again. His precious students thought they were so secretive, so clever. He could sense the tensing of their muscles as they waited to hear what he had to say. Kakashi remembered fondly the threatening note upon which he'd left the two males earlier that day. He had hinted toward severe consequences for their actions, and he knew that both Naruto and Sasuke remembered his words well. They were anticipating punishment, and they were certainly going to get it.
Just not in the way they thought.
"Now that you've all had a touching reunion," Kakashi began, indicating with a nod of his head the sore ribs Sasuke was rubbing profusely and the lump on the head that Sakura had been kind enough to give Naruto, "there are some things we need to discuss."
The tension in Naruto and Sasuke's stances doubled at those words. Their jaws clenched, their eyes darkened, yet all the while they managed to maintain expressions of perfect tranquility. Perhaps they'll make good shinobi someday after all. Kakashi thought with a private laugh. He spread his arms outward as if he meant to sweep the entire forest into them. "As beautiful as it is here and as much as I think this training trip has changed you all," he paused to see the two boys exchange guilty looks, "it's about time we headed back to civilization. I'm giving us one more night here to relax; at dawn, we depart."
Without another word, Kakashi about-faced and headed into the trees, calling over his shoulder, "Boys, I'm assigning you the task of finding us some meat for dinner. Sakura, get a proper fire going. I'll fetch the water. We meet back here in one hour for dinner."
Kakashi giggled again, carefully keeping his voice out of the realm of human hearing. He could just imagine the aghast looks on the faces of his male students as they realized Kakashi was not going to immediately punish them. With perfect timing, he heard Sakura's now faint voice asking, "What's the matter with you two? Why do you look like you just got a kunai in the stomach?"
Because they're still waiting for the kunai to come. Kakashi laughed openly and disappeared into the shadows.
…
Naruto cursed violently under his breath, calling forth the most vulgar oaths he knew in the hopes that they would calm his frustration. There was no food. None. Zilch. Nada. Nowhere, as far as he could sense in any given direction. What had happened to all the twittering birds, leaping deer, and curious rabbits? It was as if they'd been warned ahead of time that predators were on the way. Naruto's vengeful stomach did not miss a single opportunity to remind him of how long it had been since he'd last filled it.
Adding to his already considerable annoyance was the silence of his partner in crime: Uchiha Sasuke. The black-haired boy had set off into the woods after receiving Kakashi's orders without so much as a look over his shoulder to see if Naruto was following him. The blonde was forced to run after him in order to match the brisk pace the other shinobi had set; after a day of physical exertion, unnecessary running was far from welcome. They finally had a moment to themselves, and all Sasuke wanted to do was ignore him.
One second he's pouring his heart out, the next he's back to being a distant bastard. Naruto thought with an angry huff. Was what he said before a joke? Some dumb trick meant to fuck with my "inferior" mind? I swear I'll kill that bastard if he was just fucking around.
Not that Naruto knew what he would do if Sasuke wasn't playing a cruel trick. The older boy's confession had left Naruto more confused than he'd ever felt before. Just days ago, he had told his teammate exactly what he thought about love. The next thing he knew, they were rutting right there on the forest floor like common beasts. And now all Naruto could think about was how perfectly soft his lover's hair was. How beautiful his name sounded when it dripped from those pale lips. How much… he missed Sasuke even when they were mere feet away from each other.
Is this… what love is? Naruto thought tentatively, frightened by the thought. He'd never felt anything like this in his life, not even for Sakura whom he claimed to pine for. With no emotion to compare with, Naruto could not begin to dismember his feelings enough to give them a name. All his theories on love were useless to him now. He'd based them on a life without love. Now that he'd experienced it for himself… he realized how ignorant he'd been. It was like trying to describe a rainbow without knowing the name of a single color.
Naruto shuddered at the thought of a rainbow. Of all things, he had to become involved with another boy. He could already hear the other villagers whispering behind his back. A relationship of this sort wasn't completely unheard of, and it wasn't completely unacceptable, but it certainly wasn't preferable to "normal" relationships that could produce children.
The blonde shook his head slowly. What had he gotten himself into to?
Before he could ponder that thought, Naruto face-planted painfully into something remarkably hard and warm. A loud curse cracked through the air, and Naruto recognized the speaker as Sasuke. Taking a dazed step backwards, Naruto paused as he waited for the stars exploding in front of his eyes to fade away. He couldn't imagine that he'd managed to walk right into a tree, or that a tree could be so warm, but what other explanation was there?
"You moron, there goes our dinner," Sasuke seethed, his voice dripping with venom. It made Naruto shiver to hear the change from when that same voice had whispered breathily in his ear. The blonde shook his head to make his vision clear faster and glanced up. Sasuke was glaring at him from mere inches away, holding a kunai in his clenched fist. Naruto glared back automatically, a reflex he hadn't managed to shake from the days when Sasuke and he were mortal enemies. At first, he thought Sasuke meant to attack him right there, but then he saw the disappearing form of a deer dashing into a grove of trees several hundred feet away.
With a start, Naruto realized that while he'd been daydreaming, Sasuke was actually looking for food. The black-haired boy had found it, and had been poised and ready to take the deer down when Naruto—oblivious to the fact that Sasuke had stopped walking—had plowed right into him and scared the deer off, probably ruining their one chance at eating that night. Naruto slapped a hand to his forehead, amazed at his innate ability to screw up.
"I'm sorry, Sasuke," he said piteously, more speaking to his growling stomach than to his lover.
"Apologies are meaningless." Sasuke's voice flashed with silver fangs. "In an emergency, a mistake like that could mean the death of yourself and everyone depending on you to find food. How is it that you manage to ruin even the smallest of assignments?"
Naruto's mood went from apologetic to furious in what must have been record time.
"You bastard! It was a simple mistake! Where do you get off lecturing me over something so trivial, Mr. Holier-Than-Thou?"
Sasuke turned away and folded his arms across his chest, clearly saying that Naruto was not worth a reply. Naruto's mouth dropped open in disbelief. Was he in some kind of time warp? This felt unmistakably like the old days of fighting senselessly with Sasuke over every little thing. After everything they'd been through together, was it that easy to go back to the way they were?
This is exactly why I don't believe in love. The thought shocked Naruto as it ran unbidden through his mind. His heart grew cold in his chest as he repeated the words silently to himself. This is EXACTLY why I don't believe in love. It slips away so easily, just when I thought I was beginning to understand it.
"Did you mean what you said before?" The words were out of Naruto's lips before he had a chance to think them. With blank blue eyes, he saw Sasuke's body go stiff.
"About you being an idiot? Of course I meant it."
Naruto was not fooled by Sasuke's feigned misunderstanding. The black-haired ninja knew exactly what Naruto was referring to, but he was not about to answer without being a hundred percent sure.
Naruto toyed with his options for a moment; he could always pretend he'd meant something else, but somehow he knew that now was not the moment for cowardice.
"You already know what I'm talking about, Sasuke." Naruto's voice had dropped to a soft murmur, but he knew the other boy could hear him perfectly. "Did you mean what you said before, or were you just fucking with me? Did you mean it when you said… you loved me?"
Naruto's voice cracked as he spoke those last three words. He suddenly found himself lacking oxygen and gulped to fill his empty lungs. There was no going back now. The next words from Sasuke's throat would decide everything. They already knew that Kakashi had the worst in store for them. The real question was would it be worth it in the end?
Sasuke looked like a piece of colored marble, he was standing so rigidly. His heart beat so furiously in his chest he could feel the vibrations in his churning stomach. Why did Naruto have to ask that question, of all the questions in the world? It was the one he knew he would have the hardest time giving an honest answer to. Every instinct he had told him to deny it. Protect yourself. Manipulate. Escape while you can. He'd been a small child the last time he'd trusted someone with the truth, and he remembered quite well what that trust had gotten him.
Lie. He chanted it to himself. Lie. Lie Lie. It'll all go away if you just lie.
Slowly, Sasuke turned to face Naruto, already practicing the lie in his head. His lips parted to speak it, this vile mistruth that would save him from the more frightening reality. Lying was so much easier than people thought.
Blue eyes struck him like piercing arrows. Sasuke nearly shuddered from the friction in the air as his eyes aligned with his lover's, their bodies feet apart that might as well have been inches. Naruto looked like he was standing on the brink of total annihilation. It would be so easy for Sasuke to shatter the ocean-tinted glass that composed those beautiful eyes. He could crush Naruto with a single word.
…and in a rush of nauseating feeling, Sasuke realized that he couldn't do it.
This was one lie that would never leave his lips.
So instead… he fled.
Faster than he'd ever moved in his life, Sasuke was gone. It took Naruto several long seconds to realize that the space in front of him was no longer occupied by another person. He stood there, stunned. His lips parted as if to form words, but he could find none. He felt… nothing. A void had opened within him that he could not begin to describe. Sasuke had left him there, abandoned him like every person he'd ever grown close to. Like his parents. Like his friends. Like everyone. And the thing that bothered him the most was that he didn't understand what this meant. Sasuke would not have left in order to spare him the pain of rejection. The cold bastard didn't care enough about anyone to do that; however, Naruto could not understand why it would be more difficult for Sasuke to tell him he loved him the second time around than it was the first time.
So… why did Sasuke leave?
Naruto would not have long to ponder this question. A prickle of chakra brushed his skin, and in a flash, the blond realized he was no longer alone.
To Be Continued…
Tune in for next time, my loves. This time, it really is the last chapter, I swear!
