CHAPTER 6
SOLUTIONS
LILY POV
The closet was dead silent. This was one of those moments when I truly wished I hadn't kissed Sirius, and then at least it wouldn't be so awkwardly silent in here. We would be laughing, and maybe James would smile. I couldn't help but realize it was my fault he hadn't smiled of late.
"I'msorry!" I blurted suddenly, unable to take the tension any longer. James didn't even move and that made me angry. I had after all apologized to him. "James, I'm sorry."
James sighed and it sounded weary.
"I don't understand what I did this time Lily." He admitted, turning his face away from me. I felt the blood rush to my face.
"Uhm…well. You see…you kissed Samantha." I admitted. James's head whipped up in shock.
"What? But why would you care? You hate me for Merlins sake!" He exclaimed.
"No…I actually quite…well nevermind. Forget it."
"What? Lily, no! I deserve to know why you went and snogged my best mate because I kissed another girl! I deserve to know how you feel after all of this." He stated, turned fully in my direction now.
"I don't owe you anything!" I was angry now.
"You owe me an explanation. You at least owe me an explanation. I'm in love with you. Do you not get that? Do you not get how much you mean to me, how much you've always meant to me?" He clutched my hand, his eyes wide in a desperate manner that made my stomach drop and my heart pound.
"James, do you even know what being in love is?" I asked, my voice trembling.
"I have a pretty good idea." He responded darkly "Do you know what it's like Lily? Love, I mean."
"Yes."
"How?" It was a plead, not a question or demand. I bit my lip. I knew I was in love with him, it was the only explanation. But that didn't mean he needed to know.
"I can't tell you that." I told him.
"Dammnit Lily!" He shouted, angry. He half lurched forward so that is fingers were wrapped around my upper arms. His eyes were intense in the amount of passion he held at that moment as he stared at me. I turned my face away slightly, about to cry.
"Why can't you just tell me?" He whispered, "If it's that it isn't me, well then so what? I…I can't pretend it wouldn't be hell for a while but, but that's NOT- I just, it's happened before. And hey, whatever doesn't kill me makes me stronger, right?" His voice sounded pleading and desperate. It tore at my heart and I knew I needed to tell him right then. So I did the only thing I could come up with; I grabbed his face between my hands and brought my mouth to his. His lips were sweet and warm with the harsh undertaste of something else, and his tongue was like heaven mixed with my own. I had never been kissed like this; I had never been kissed by James. When we pulled apart, his hair was more unruly than usual, his eyes heavily lidded, his lips swollen and breathing shallow. It made me want to kiss him again.
"Go out with me?" He asked for the last time.
I could only nod before he kissed me again.
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