Chapter 19: Animal Instincts
Aside from that morning's incident the rest of the day passed uneventfully. They walked mainly in silence, talking quietly in groups of two and three from time to time, but for the most part simply keeping alert and enjoying each other's company. Even Usagi, riding perched on Akamaru's head, had to admit that they were hardly ever all together like this, the entire family in one big group. There was something oddly fulfilling about it.
Sasuke was still getting used to walking at the head of the group. There was an inherent impracticality in the leader going first, he thought as he fought the urge to glance back over his shoulder. As the Golden General he was responsible for the lives of everyone in the Golden Army, but just how was he meant to keep an eye on them if they were all walking behind him? Again he fought the urge to simply turn around and do a head check, but he knew it was a bad idea, and would simply cause suspicion and alarm. It was terribly frustrating, and twice he almost caught himself mentally asking Naruto what to do. Naruto had never seemed to have this problem, but surely Naruto didn't care about the lives of his friends less than Sasuke. He tried to think back, remembering his days at the end of the procession, trying to picture Naruto in the lead. He never just walked, no, he always had to yammer on as he did so. Sasuke remembered him as being fond of long winded speeches and loud, endless introductions, but he'd never seen Naruto go on so long as when he was leading the group, every once in a while glancing over his shoulder, or turning around and walking backwards for a way as he made an important statement or . . . Of course, Sasuke thought bitterly to himself. His endless monologues had always been punctuated by a long look over his shoulder, eyes sweeping over everyone behind him. What he'd always taken for posturing in front of a captive audience had in fact been an excuse to check on them all, making sure they were all still safe in his wake.
Sasuke snorted at the irony. It seemed you really didn't know anyone until they were dead.
"Everyone's fine," said a voice a little ways behind him to his left, making him jump. He turned around to snap at Shikamaru, but instead found Neji coming up beside him.
"We're all fine back here," Neji repeated, not looking at Sasuke but staring straight ahead.
"What makes you . . ." Sasuke began.
"You were straining to look over your shoulder," Neji informed him quietly, cutting him off mid-sentence "you were starting to twitch."
Sasuke looked away, and for a moment nobody said anything. Then Sasuke broke the silence. "How did he do it?" he asked, not exactly to Neji but more to the universe at large.
"How did who do what?" Neji asked calmly, still not looking at him.
"How did Naruto do this?" Sasuke asked, "How did he take care of all these people? They're all perfectly independent and self-sufficient, and yet each in their own way, they depended on him. They all needed him for something, and had something to thank him for. He took care of each one in a different way. How did he do it?"
Neji didn't answer for a moment, instead letting his gaze slide slightly out of focus, his eyes wandering to the sky. "There are things about Naruto I realized I would never understand a long time ago."
For a moment he just stared, mulling it over. In the end, he found he could do nothing but nod his agreement. Kakashi hadn't called Naruto "#1 in surprising people" for nothing.
"I need to speak with you about little rabbit." Neji said after another long pause.
"You know she hates it when you call her that," was Sasuke's instinctual response.
Another long pause and a heavy hearted sigh. "You can't just ignore what happened the other day, Sasuke-san."
"I'm not ignoring it," Sasuke replied coolly, "she's here isn't she?"
Neji almost growled in frustration. "You know perfectly well what I mean!" he snapped, "She has the nine-tailed demon fox sealed inside her! She needs training!"
"What training?" Sasuke asked, raising an eyebrow, "From who? As I remember it, most of Naruto's use of the nine-tails in battle was instinctual, like what Usagi did the other day. He learned a few basics from Jiraiya, but most of what he knew about fighting with it he figured out on his own."
Neji stared at him a moment, something between pain and confusion undulating across his face, making Sasuke wonder what he was about to suggest. Then he looked at the ground. "I'd like to take her home, then," he said quietly.
That Sasuke had not been expecting. "Why?" he demanded, "we've never faced the Nightmare without the nine-tails' power. We might need her."
"But she has no experience!" Neji protested, almost angrily, "She told Shikamaru nothing like that had ever happened before! If there's no kind of training then I think we have to consider the fact that we're sending a six-year-old into a life-or-death battle! We can't just toy with Usagi's life this way!"
"You wouldn't have hesitated to send Naruto," Sasuke pointed out. "Even when Naruto was only twelve, you wouldn't have objected to him leading us into this fight."
"That's twice Usagi's age!" Neji snapped, really angry this time, "and anyway that's not the point! She's never done this before! She has no idea what she's doing!"
"Naruto never had any idea what he was doing!" Sasuke shot back, "do you think that, however many times he unleashed the nine-tails, he ever developed a method for it? Some kind of secret technique? No! He never did any of that truly on purpose, it was always half an accident! He worked on instinct! Usagi's already proven she can do that!"
"But . . . but . . ." Neji seemed at a loss, quite out of reasons but still sure, "she's only a child, Sasuke-san."
Sasuke sighed. "So was Naruto. But when the time came we all learned to step aside and trust him, and just back him up when he needed us. Usagi has the nine-tails now, she has all that instinct. I think we need to learn to trust her."
-That Night-
The campfire was more of a bonfire, big enough for all fifteen of them, sixteen counting Akamaru, to sit around it. Not that they all did, at least not at once. They all came and went at random, so at any given time there was a totally different assortment of people reclining by the fire. They went off for wood, to find places to sleep, and some even slipped off to find a place not to far away where there was a bit of privacy to be had amongst the trees.
Sakura sat by the fire, arms around her legs and chin resting on her knees. She gazed resignedly into the fire's depths, trying to make sense of her jumbled thoughts. The Golden Army was together again. Their way of life had encompassed them once more, taking them back in time to when they'd been a younger, more innocent group of people. This felt familiar, almost happy. Still, she couldn't help holding her breath a little. She knew perfectly well, she was waiting for the other shoe to drop.
"Sakura-chan."
Thump.
She turned, to see Sasuke standing a few feet behind her, leaning against a tree, his body seeming to stand in some kind of doorway between the ring of light cast by the fire, and the darkness of the forest. She quickly glanced around, to find that not only was Lee gone but the only ones around were Shino, Hinata, Usagi and Kiba. He must have waited a while for this opportunity.
"Sakura-chan, I need to talk to you, its important." Sasuke said, loud enough for everyone to hear.
Sakura looked at Hinata for help. Hinata, unfortunately, misread her expression, and simply smiled reassuringly. "Its alright, Sakura-chan."
Sighing, Sakura got to her feet, brushed some dirt off her clothes, and followed Sasuke into the trees. He tried to lead her deep into the woods, but the moment she lost sight of the firelight she backtracked a step and dug her heels in, refusing to go any further.
Realizing that this was a much privacy as he was going to get, he stood facing her, in front of her but not too close, drawing as near to her as possible without alarming her.
"What do you want?" she asked coldly.
Sasuke fought the urge to wince. There was ice in her tone, and it bit. Hoping to melt her cool demeanor, he took a step closer, reaching out a hand to cup her cheek, stroking it lightly. "Nothing to be so cold about, Sakura-chan."
She slapped his hand away, and again the desire to flinch was almost overwhelming. It seemed she had her guard up, she was in a no-nonsense mood, and she wasn't playing games. That was fine with him. He could be serious.
"Actually I was wondering when you were going to tell me about this," he reached for her again, this time trailing a single finger down her stomach over her abdomen.
Sakura froze. "You . . . you know?" she stammered.
Sasuke smiled serenely at her. "Yes, Sakura-chan. I've known since that day in the hospital. Of course," his hand went to here hips and he drew her closer, "I would have preferred if you had come to me, and told me on your own."
As though no registering the hands on her hips, or their proximity, she didn't move. She simply stared up at him, a strange, lost look in her eyes. "Why . . why should I . . . should I have told you?" she asked shakily, "Its none of your business!"
Sasuke's smile just intensified a little. "Sakura-chan," he whispered, drawing her a little closer now. She didn't seem to notice. "I'm the Golden General now, remember? I need to know if someone in the Golden Army is . . . in your condition. It changes things, doesn't it?"
Sakura didn't feel the hands on her hips pulling her closer until her body was pressed to his, nor did she feel them glide up her arms toward her shoulders. Her ears rang, her skin crawled, her blood boiled then turned to ice. Panic shot through her system, shutting her inside her own head long enough for him to get a good grip on her.
"It changes the circumstances," Sasuke whispered huskily, his arms stroking slowly over her shoulders.
"It affects the way people see and react to you," he continued, inching his face closer as his fingers wound into her hair.
"It alters your hormones," he rasped against her mouth, before covering it with his.
He kissed her, deep and passionate. Her mind was too numb to tell her to even close her mouth as he slipped his tongue past her lips to explore. He drank in her sweet taste, relishing the sound of her harsh breathing through her nose. His tongue slid across hers and he felt a jolt of pleasure shoot down to his groin.
She thought she was suffocating. His mouth was hot, firm and insistent, and her own soft mouth yielded to him instantly. It was as though the will to fight had drained out of her. His body against hers went unnoticed, her entire being gone numb. He didn't arouse her, he couldn't. She was far too afraid.
It was like he was floating up to heaven, and she were being dragged down to hell.
When at last they broke apart he released her and stepped back, only to grasp her hips again as she swayed dangerously. Once she had her footing, he left her there, with a chaste peck on the lips and another light caress of her abdomen. He left her to wonder in fear and confusion what had happened, what he had meant, and what an earth to do. He didn't want to, but he deemed it necessary. He hated to see her cry, to see her in pain, but he knew it had to be done. He knew she wouldn't yield to him without a fight. A weakening of her defenses was necessary. He might never get another opportunity like this.
