Chapter 16
The next three days were full of fun and sunny Los Angeles. Well, they were full of Los Angeles. It was definitely not sunny (rained for three days straight) and it was not anywhere near fun. The flock and I spent most of our days under the bright lights of Starlight Productions, mingling with the big-wigs and the wannabes. Reading lines (never thought I'd have that as a tidbit for a future memoir) while Jeb worked on procuring a new safe house. The three days did provide mucho time for reflection though as I currently had a lot to think about.
1) Who or what blew up our safe house
2) Dirk Walborn and his merry band of dark suits
3) Total's imminent wedding (that was a glimmer – didn't care to reflect too much on that one)
4) Nudge's new fascination with acting
5) and the big chested RHW who fixed a lusty stare on Fang whenever they occupied similar space
That last one permeated my cerebrum until I thought my brain would explode.
Today I enjoyed the extreme pleasure of reading lines with Fang as Dmitri corralled a gaggle of GQ's auditioning for Fang's role in this nonsense. Imagine my surprise when we walked into the screening room and Dmitri shoved scripts in our faces.
"What is this?!" I spit out after reading the proposed fiasco for today's agenda.
"Vat ees vat?"
"Dis… I mean… this!" I waved the script in Dmitri's face. My mom extracted the pages from my clammy hands.
"Vell, thees ees a scene from da movie. Vee need to see if chemistry ees right vith Chelsea."
"Vell, ju can just forget it!" I snapped and stormed out of the room.
The scene that Dmitri wanted Fang and I to model was none other than – ugh – I can barely say it, let alone think it.
Picture this – submarine. Angel swimming just shy of said sub in radioactive waters at unfathomable ocean depths with monster fish with whom she could carry on conversations but who still looked like they wanted to eat her. Enter Max pulling plan crazy and stupid out of her back pocket. Gill-girl Max shall brave the ocean depths to rescue or assist or whatever she needed to do to support her beloved Angel. Everyone tries to stop her. She's crazy. She'll never survive!
The only one in this scene that doesn't try to stop her is Fang, her right-hand man. He has her back.
Max sees him for who he is – the one she trusts her life with. The one she is completely in love with. Her soul mate.
And so what does Max do? Slaps a long drawn out kiss on him that would prove a little risqué for the PG-13 crowd.
Okay – so I know this really all happened. You've read the books. You know it to be true. I was fully aware that I locked lips in front of the entire flock and various others (including Brigid – one of the few bright spots). But did we have to share the mucho embarrassing episode with the whole world? I tolerated Iggy's merciless teasing for five weeks about that impulsive encounter. Finally, finally stuffed it far back in my brain so that I could forget about it and wham! Here it was again – revisited in the written form.
If you haven't guessed this already, I was not much for PDA's. Rarely cried. Hardly told people I loved them (I was working on that). About the only emotion I wore on my sleeve was anger. And now they wanted me to be all – you know – with Fang. Did they really think I was going to kiss him in front of fifty some people when I barely felt comfortable kissing him in private?
And how was that moment relevant to the movie anyway? This little CSM project was supposed to be a sixty minute documentary about the bird kids that saved the world. Now it was more like a suck-u-mentary. A two hour action-packed adventure that just had to include a little romance. Ugh. I hated Hollywood.
Five minutes into my inner harangue, Fang made his way out of the screen test room and found me pacing and sulking in the hallway.
"What?!" I barked at him, my eyes seething.
His mouth crooked a half-smile before he approached me and said the only four words that could have possibly soothed me at that moment.
"Let's get outta here."
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A/N: Sorry for the delay - I planned to submit this Saturday, but for some reason could not upload this. Weird. Anyway - other apologies... I've only read MAX once and granted I have a fairly photogenic memory when it comes to stuff I read, but I am certain some fallacies exist in what I just wrote - just pretend I know what I'm talking about.
PS - the suck-u-mentary line I stole from Tibby (Traveling Pants) - couldn't resist - just needed to issue the disclaimer. :)
I will try to update by Thursday - if I can... :/
