She wasn't quite sure what woke her up the next night, but when she opened her eyes, Maura was standing by the couch looking down at her. "Hey… what's up?" Jane asked and rubbed her eyes.
"Can I stay here…?" Maura whispered.
Jane couldn't see much in the darkness and was about to say something when a flash of lightning struck followed by a deafening rumble of thunder. Maura jumped and drew in a shaky breath.
"Please?"
Jane instantly understood it was fear and nodded. "Of course. Come here."
Maura quickly slipped in under the sheet and curled up against her, face tucked against Jane's neck. Jane wrapped her arms around Maura and held on tight. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to say so she just held Maura. The storm was raging outside with rain pouring down on the roof. Jane knew she wasn't exactly a light sleeper, but how could she have slept through all that noise?
Another crack of thunder made Maura shiver. Jane stroke her hair and planted a kiss on the top of her head. "What's worse, the lightning or the thunder?"
"Everything" was the short reply.
Jane smiled for herself. "Well, if you close your eyes, you won't see the lightning." She had no idea what she was saying or doing, and felt more stupid than comforting. "And the thunder is just sounds. It can't hurt you." A sudden urge to protect Maura rushed through Jane, and then she realized how right it felt to have her fake girlfriend in her arms. She tightened her embrace just to see if it was possible to have Maura any closer. "I won't let anything hurt you."
If Jane had had any hopes of getting through the week without falling too hard for Maura, it was all gone now. She already knew what it was like to kiss her, laugh with her and do nothing with her. Having her in her arms like this was the final piece. She could smell the sweet perfume, feel her breathing and it all felt exactly like everything else with this woman; easy, comfortable and right.
They didn't say much as they waited for the storm to pass. Jane whispered a few words of comfort (she hoped) whenever she felt Maura shudder, but as the storm slowly moved further away from them, Maura relaxed. None of them moved until the storm was too far away to be heard. Jane slowly lifted her head only to find Maura still with her eyes closed. It seemed like she had fallen asleep, and Jane carefully lowered her head and closed her eyes as well.
Jane was the first one who woke up the next morning. She felt the warm body against hers and immediately remembered why Maura was snuggled up against her. It made her smile and she slowly breathed out and closed her eyes again. She could might as well take advantage of the situation, even though there was no way she'd fall asleep again.
"I know you're awake" Maura suddenly said without moving anything but her lips.
"How did you know?" Jane asked and smiled.
"Your breathing changed."
Jane's shoulders shook in amusement. "Nothing gets past you…" Neither of them made any effort to move, and Jane realized that Maura must've been awake before her in order to notice the change in Jane's breathing. And she still hadn't moved. Jane took that as a good sign.
"I'm sorry I woke you and ambushed you in the middle of the night… I just really hate storms like that."
"Don't be. I just hope you felt better. Or safer…"
Maura nodded, and Jane could feel the smile against her neck. "I did. Thank you."
Jane's throat was dry and she struggled to get out any words at all. "Anytime." Her thumb carefully stroke across Maura's shoulder, but she stopped herself when she realized what she was doing.
"Can I be honest with you?" Maura whispered, still not moving a muscle.
"Of course…" Jane whispered back, scared it would be something that would completely ruin the tranquility she felt.
"I haven't been in a relationship in three years. I forgot how nice it can be to… cuddle. And I can't find the will to move away right now and get up."
Okay, relax, breathe normally, she noticed you were awake just by your breathing, you don't want her to notice your heart beating like crazy. Oh wait… her head is resting right above your heart…
"We're on vacation, Maura. We can do whatever we want…" Jane tried to laugh it off, anything to hide the relief she was feeling. "And yeah, I forgot all about that too… It's coming back to me now though."
"So you don't have a girlfriend back home in Boston?"
Jane had to laugh. "No, I don't. If I did, you really think she would let me go to paradise to pretend to be your girlfriend for a week?"
"No… maybe not" Maura smiled.
The day went on and neither of them mentioned the cuddling. It was like it had never happened, except Maura found herself constantly drawn to Jane, always seeking something, even if it was just a hand on her shoulder. After so much time without any intimacy, every touch left her craving for more. She wanted to feel a pair of arms embracing her again, wanted to hear the slow breathing of another person. She simply wanted to be close.
They returned back from an early dinner, and Jane went to check her phone. She loved going out without any connection to the real world, even if it was just for a few hours. After all, it was her vacation. That night she had a missed call from her mother and she decided to call back. She excused herself to Maura and went down towards the water while she waited for her mother to pick up.
"Hi honey! How is paradise?" Angela answered after a few rings.
"Well… it's paradise, I can't complain" Jane smiled.
"Good! Is everything going okay with you and Maura too?"
"Yeah, it's going great. No problems at all." She hadn't been able to keep the whole trip a secret from her mother, and when she first found out, Jane had told her everything. "Ma… I kinda need to talk to you about something."
"Sure, what is it?"
Jane couldn't believe what she was about to do. She never talked with her mother about stuff like this, but if she couldn't tell someone soon, she would go crazy. She sighed and shoved her hand in her pocket. "I think I'm falling for her…" It was silent on the other end. "And it freaks me out a bit. I'm in such a mess right now."
"Does she know?"
"No! Of course not. And I'm not gonna tell her either! She'll probably freak out too and we still have a few more days here. I don't want it to be all awkward between us…" She waited for a response, but the waves crashing against the shore was the only thing she could hear. "Ma… please say something…"
"I'm not sure what I should say, Jane. You seem to know what to do… and I agree. You shouldn't say anything. She is just pretending to be gay. Unless she has done something to indicate she might have feelings for you too. Has she?"
"I… I don't think so. I don't know, it's probably just wishful thinking."
"What is? You can tell me."
Jane hesitated for a few moments before she sighed and caved, telling her mother everything that had happened the night before.
Maura stood by the open doors in the bedroom and watched Jane pacing down by the water. Something was clearly bothering her, but eventually she hung up the phone and sat down on one of the sun beds. Maura waited a few minutes before she walked down to Jane. "Would you like some company or do you want to be alone?" she asked softly as she approached Jane.
"No, please stay. I like your company."
She sat down on the bed next to Jane and looked at her. "Everything okay with your mother?"
Jane nodded and smiled. "Yeah, everything's fine."
Maura didn't want to be too nosy so she turned her eyes towards the sun and the ocean. She wanted to be brave and tell Jane exactly how good it felt to fall asleep in her arms the night before, but the words didn't seem to work with her. All the small touches from that same day played on repeat in her head, and she decided to take another approach. "You probably noticed I was a bit clingy today… I'm sorry if it was uncomfortable for you."
Jane quickly looked at Maura and smiled. "It wasn't uncomfortable, Maura. Don't worry."
So she had noticed. "Good. It was just nice to finally be… close to someone again. It's been a while."
Jane nodded slowly. "I know what you mean."
They both kept their eyes on each other a few seconds, and Maura needed to know if Jane had the same thoughts as she did. It was just too awkward to actually say the words. She needed a way to say what she wanted, without saying it. She was good with words, it shouldn't be a problem for her. Except it was. She stared down at her hands, trying to think of something to say.
"Actually…" Jane interrupted Maura's thoughts. "Sometimes I wish I had someone I could just… cuddle with. I mean, we all need it from time to time. Someone I'm comfortable with, and things aren't awkward or tense or anything. Just easy… watch a movie maybe."
Maura couldn't help but smile, the words were like music, sweet and uplifting. "Or just watch the sunset…" she replied with ease. She looked back at Jane who was smiling.
"Come on" Jane almost whispered and reached out her hand. "Let's pretend your parents can see us…"
It took a lot of effort, but Maura managed to casually move herself over to Jane without looking too eager. She sat down between Jane's legs and slowly released a deep sigh when Jane's arms wrapped around her waist. "Now all we need is the champagne and chocolate covered strawberries."
Jane laughed behind her, but didn't say anything. And Maura didn't mind. She could happily sit there and watch the sun go down for the night. Strong arms around her, warm breath against her cheek and peace all around.
"This week hasn't been too bad, has it?" Jane asked as the sun was almost gone.
"Not at all. It has been fun. And I obviously picked the right woman for the job of fooling my parents. Even though I still can't believe I actually went through with this."
"No kidding" Jane laughed. "I can't believe it either after I've gotten to know you a bit better."
Maura smiled and was baffled over how easy it was with Jane. She was in Jane's arms, watching the sunset on the beach, probably looking like a couple, and still it wasn't embarrassing or awkward to talk about how they had pretended to be a couple for a week.
"How about we go for a few drinks to celebrate your successful plan?" Jane suggested. "It's Friday after all… and we should take advantage of the amazing drinks they have here with the colorful umbrellas."
"I'd like that" Maura chuckled. "I believe it will be a long time until I can go to a bar on the beach again."
"Exactly!"
"But only if you let me pay for everything." Maura knew Jane would object.
"No, I can't let you do that, Maura. I want to pay for myself."
Maura smiled for herself and shook her head. "Not acceptable. You sacrificed over a week of your time to do this, it's only fair."
"Yeah" Jane scoffed. "I sacrificed a week where I had nothing planned, just to go to paradise and pretend to be your girlfriend. What a sacrifice…" She laughed softly when she heard the words out loud.
"Jane… I insist. We're not going drinking unless I pay for it. Deal?" She waited a couple of seconds, and when she didn't hear anything, she knew exactly what Jane was doing. "And don't roll your eyes at me!"
Jane burst out laughing. "Holy shit, do you have eyes in the back of your head, or what? How did you know that?"
"Like you said, nothing gets past me" Maura smiled and knew she had won.
Maura stared down at the tiny glass filled with clear liquid and she scrunched her nose. "I don't see why anyone would do this. It tastes horrible!" She wiped her hand on her jeans before she turned to Jane.
"Well, you're not supposed to taste it!" Jane laughed. "You're supposed to just throw it down. This is the first time I've ever seen someone take a sip of tequila!" She couldn't stop laughing even though she tried. "I'm sorry, Maura, I don't mean to laugh at you…"
"But I like to try things first" Maura smiled. She knew Jane didn't mean to make fun of her in any way.
"Oh, I know! You did ask me to kiss you, remember? I still wonder what would've happened if you did freak out… But okay, so now you've tried tequila. Ready to do it properly?" Jane slowly pushed the salt closer to Maura and smiled.
Maura wasn't really sure, but she decided to try. She nodded and took a deep breath. "So, first salt, then the tequila and the lime, right?" She looked at Jane who was grinning.
"Yup! You're a fast learner, Isles." Jane grabbed the salt and turned to Maura. "Okay, so first, lick the skin between your thumb and forefinger." She demonstrated on her own hand, Maura followed her instructions. "And now the salt…" Jane sprinkled salt on their hands. "Then you hold the lime in the same hand."
Maura carefully picked up the lime and held it. "And now the tequila I assume." She got an affirmative nod and lifted the glass with her right hand.
"Alright, when you're ready, breathe out, lick the salt, down the tequila and bite the lime." Jane felt pretty smug for having talked the fancy Maura Isles into doing tequila shots with her, and even paying for it! Well, maybe not the last part, but at least it was Jane's idea to go drinking. "Ready?" she asked and smiled at the look on Maura's face.
"I suppose so…" she sighed and breathed out.
Jane watched as Maura did the shot, and when Maura bit down on the lime, her eyes closed and she shuddered and coughed next to Jane.
"Oh my god!" The sour taste of the lime combined with the tequila made her do all sorts of faces, and Jane laughed. "Why did you make me do this?" Maura laughed and finally opened her eyes only to find Jane still with her glass full. "And why haven't you done yours yet?"
Jane grinned. "I wanted to watch you do it first. And that was priceless! Cheers!" She lifted the glass before she did the same as Maura, but without all the faces at the end. Maura was already sipping on her exotic drink that looked more like orange juice than a drink, obviously trying to get rid of the taste.
"You made it look so easy!" Maura complained as Jane put down her glass.
"I've done it before, baby" Jane smirked but instantly looked away when she heard what she said. She cleared her throat and laughed shyly. "One more? Or have you had enough already?" she asked in an attempt to drown out the new nickname.
"Maybe later. I need to recover from this one" Maura smiled and shoved the glass further away from her. "But now I'm curious. What if I had freaked out when you kissed me? What would you have done? Would you still have gone through with this… charade?" She turned slightly on the chair so she was facing Jane.
Jane nodded and reached for her own drink. "Yeah. We didn't have a choice, did we? It would just have been a bit awkward instead. And I probably wouldn't have kissed you later that night."
"You didn't think it was awkward to kiss a complete stranger?"
"You didn't feel like a stranger…" Jane smiled and carefully turned her head to Maura. It wasn't even close to a lie. Almost a week later and Jane could still feel the touch of Maura's lips against hers, and it still surprised her how easy it had felt. An instant connection, like they had been kissing for years.
Now Maura was the one looking away, seemingly shy. She smiled softly and stirred in her drink with the straw. She really had no response.
Going out for drinks turned out to be a good idea, especially for Jane. Her conversation with her mother was tucked away (but not forgotten) and she managed to relax as she sipped on her drink. The bar was perfect in any way, no roof and therefore no crowded space, no floor (except for the dancefloor in front of the DJ) and if you couldn't relax dragging your toes through the sand while you were enjoying a drink, then you probably weren't able to relax at all.
She had lost count of the drinks, Jane only knew she had entered that feel-good state of mind, where she felt confident, things were light and funny and it felt good to be dizzy. Music boomed from the speakers and the dancefloor was crowded. And Maura was on the edge of the floor, swaying to the music. Which was why Jane had turned around on her chair and was watching the crowd. She didn't like to dance, and Maura knew that. So when Maura absolutely wanted to dance, she did it alone.
In her sweet daze, Jane never thought about looking away. She studied every move Maura made on the floor, didn't even care if Maura caught her looking. The music changed and a slow, but steady and almost seductive beat flowed from the speakers. A rough guitar riff followed and Maura changed her style; slower movements, eyes closed and hands in her hair. It was painful to watch for Jane and she emptied her drink in one big chug. But she couldn't look away either. Barely seconds later, she saw a guy inching closer to Maura, obviously hoping to dance with her. And Jane scoffed. Why were men always so presumptuous when it came to bars?
As soon as the guy put his hands on Maura's hips from behind, Jane jumped off her chair and swaggered towards them. She stopped right in front of Maura and looked at the guy square in the eyes. "She's mine." Maura gave no indications she had heard Jane claiming her, and Jane didn't care either. She only focused on the guy who was pretty much ignoring her. She obviously needed to change her tactics. Not caring about anything but getting rid of the guy, Jane took a step closer and put a hand around Maura's neck. They barely made eye contact before Jane pulled her close and claimed the familiar lips again.
There was a pounding in her ears when Maura kissed her back, and Jane wasn't sure if it was the beat of her heart or the beat from the music. It was all she could hear for a moment as Maura's hands came to rest on her hips. Neither of them noticed the guy shaking his head and disappearing into the crowd. Jane knew she was in trouble, but she couldn't stop her lips from moving. Maura's lips tasted sweet, exotic, like the drinks she had been having all night.
Someone bumped into them, causing Jane to lose her balance. Maura's lips slipped away from hers and they stood there looking at each other. Jane didn't know what to say and prayed that Maura wouldn't say anything either. They stood still in the middle of the moving crowd while the music still floated around them.
…maybe I'm too busy being yours to fall for somebody new, now I've thought it through…
Maura was the first to react. She smiled before she started moving to the music again and hooked one arm around Jane's neck. Jane's body seemed to have a life on its own and followed Maura's movements.
"I thought you didn't like to dance" Maura said with a pleased smile.
Jane swallowed and tried to smile. "Yeah, well… sometimes I just have to…"
"Good. Your timing was perfect. I was tired of dancing alone."
She wanted to make some sort of comment about the guy, but Jane's head was empty. So she tried to forget everything and just dance. It was easier said than done. As soon as they silenced, the music invaded her mind and the lyrics got to her.
…do I wanna know? If this feeling flows both ways…
It was like everything was teasing her, pointing out how silly she was for crushing on a straight girl. Even Maura. She was dancing slowly, both her arms were now around Jane's neck and Jane couldn't find anywhere else to place her hands than on Maura's back. And then Maura made it even worse by singing along.
"Crawling back to you… ever thought of calling when you've had a few…? Cause I always do…"
Jane instantly pulled away and took a step back. "You want another drink?" she blurted out to Maura who seemed confused. She didn't wait for an answer and went back to the bar. She ordered two drinks, and as the bartender made the first drink, Maura came up to the bar and sat down next to Jane.
"And two tequila shots" Maura added to the order. Jane looked over at her with surprise written all over her face. "What?" Maura smiled. "Maybe I will like the third one better than the first two."
Jane rolled her eyes but laughed as the first drink showed up. When all four glasses were lined up on the counter, along with the necessary lime slices and salt, Maura reached for the tequila shots and pushed one towards Jane.
"And now we're doing it together! No watching me first" she ordered.
"Let's see if you can keep up" Jane teased and was already adding salt to her hand. All she wanted was to get past the dizzy state of mind, she needed to be drunk enough to not think clearly. Or else she would never survive the night.
"Do I wanna kno-o-o-w?" Maura sang loudly as they stumbled down the beach.
"Shhh! You're gonna wake the whole neighborhood, Maura!"
She looked down at her watch and laughed. "It's only 2.30, Jane! On a Friday! They should be out partying, like us!"
"Well, not everyone can be as young and hip as us!" Jane laughed before she suddenly stopped and grabbed Maura's arm. "Is this us?" she whispered and looked towards one of the bungalows.
"Is it?" Maura studied the building before she sighed. "They all look the same!"
Jane slowly walked towards the porch with a firm grip on Maura's arm. "I think it is. Try the key."
"Why me?! Why don't you do it? What if this isn't our bungalow? They might think someone is breaking in!"
Jane looked back at Maura and laughed silently. "Damn, you're so cute when you're worried! But come on, I'm sure this is us. And if it isn't, they would never think you were dangerous at all, so it's safe."
"I can be dangerous!" Maura complained but only made Jane laugh again. "Fine, I'll prove it!" She found the key in her purse, stalked over to the door and inserted the key in the lock. Without hesitating she turned the key and lowered her shoulders when the door responded with a soft click. "This is us" she smiled over her shoulder.
Jane took a few steps closer and hovered over Maura's shoulder while she smiled. "You were so scared…" Then she opened the door and walked inside.
"I was not!" Maura laughed and followed. She made sure to lock the door behind her. "Why would I be scared when I have you to protect me?" She put down her purse on the couch and watched as Jane marched towards the bathroom.
But Jane simply scoffed. Maura kicked off her shoes and padded into the bedroom where her bed seemed really comfy. She sat down first, but within seconds she was curled up in a fetal position, closing her eyes.
"By the way" Jane mumbled as she poked her head out of the bathroom with her toothbrush sticking out of her mouth. "I thought- oh no no no. Maura…" She walked over to the bed and pulled Maura up in a sitting position. "No sleeping before toothbrush! Come on. Get up."
Maura groaned but followed Jane into the bathroom where she managed to brush her teeth without falling asleep. Jane stood next to her and laughed, mostly because a drunk and sleepy Maura trying to brush her teeth was too cute to handle. But they made it through, and when Maura walked back to the bed, stepping out of her jeans at the same time, Jane wasn't laughing anymore. She stopped by the door and watched as Maura climbed into bed and closed her eyes. Jane slowly shook her head and breathed out before she walked through the room. "Good night, Maura" she almost whispered.
"Jane… wait" Maura mumbled and rolled over on her back. "Can you stay? In case someone breaks in… or there's a storm tonight…"
She didn't really know what took her so long, but after a few deep breaths (and a soft giggle), Jane lay down next to Maura who immediately moved herself closer. Jane watched as Maura positioned them both and it didn't take long before Maura was safely settled in Jane's arms again.
"Good night" Maura sighed and relaxed.
Jane felt her body relax as well when she snuggled closer and inhaled the sweet scent of Maura's shampoo. Maybe it wasn't the best idea, but what was she supposed to do?
