A/N: With the publication of the third chapter, I have tidied the first two chapters a bit, corrected some typos and changed some scenes in some minor ways to make them more consistent with the rest of the story. As I am mostly writing without structured planning, the content in the earlier chapters might not be 100% consistent with the content in the later chapters, but as the story goes on I will be editing the earlier chapters and make them more in tune with the later chapters. It will not be an issue everyone notices, but if you do, please show understanding to the circumstances under which this was written.
Thanks everyone for your reviews, keep them coming :)
3. The Meddler
These days, Youko did not even need an alarm to wake up half past six. When rising up, Youko was careful not to disturb Sei's sleep. When she got silently dressed, she let her eyes rest on Sei's peaceful face. Judging from Sei's deep slumber, Youko could tell that she would continue sleeping for a long while.
Leaning over, Youko gave Sei a small kiss on the lips. The latter mumbled something and rolled away from Youko, who could not help smiling. It took her ultimate willpower to leave the bedroom.
An hour later, when Youko was driving her Honda to her office, Tokyo once again showed one of its less attractive faces. The traffic jam never came as a surprise to anyone, yet people always seemed annoyed to no end whenever the endless line of cars came to a halt. Youko could see angry faces inside the cars that overtook her and she heard angry shouting and the screeching sound of car horns. The skyscrapers drew jagged lines on the still dimly lit sky, and once again Youko had the irresistible urge to flee, to turn back and never stop until she could not see a single human dwelling.
Surely this could not be the world where the innocent and pure maidens of Lillian were supposed to live their lives in.
There certainly wasn't a drop of innocence to be found here.
But at least today, Youko could face the hostile world with a formidable weapon, a fresh memory of Satou Sei. For the hundreth time in the past hour, Youko imagined Sei beside her, airing witty remarks and just looking so irresistibly charming. She did not entirely believe that she actually had slept beside Sei, that the woman she had dreamt about so many times was probably still snoring in her very own bed.
It sure was an amazing coincidence, if not destiny.
What had Sei in fact been doing in the airport? Youko wondered abruptly.
She did not know.
When she started to think about it, she had no idea what Sei was doing for work either, nor did she know why Sei could so carelessly sleep in on Friday.
Cursing her own self-centered mind, Youko made a mental note to question Sei when she got back from work.
If Sei would still be there.
Maria-sama, please let Sei still be in my home when I go back, Youko prayed in her mind.
Me, self-centered?
She, who had looked out for others even in her last day in Lillian by delivering the rose to the missing student.
"If a natural meddler like you suddenly went quiet, it must have meant that you had lost all interest in me."
Her thoughts were racing chaotically. The thought of Sei not being there when she got home made her suffocate. She wanted to apologize. She wanted to be young, she wanted to be her former self again.
"Get a grip on yourself", she said aloud.
Even after her feverishly beating heart had calmed down, she could not avoid wondering where Youko the Meddler had disappeared. Had she really changed so much over the years?
The screeching sound from the horn of the car behind her forced Youko to return to the present. The traffic lights had changed to green without her noticing, and she had to accelerate hurriedly.
Yes, it is no use to think about anything right now, she assured herself.
She would talk with Sei once the weekend came. She told herself Sei would not leave without seeing her or at least leaving a message.
Yes, they would have a proper discussion during the weekend.
It was with the thought of seeing Sei inside her heart that Youko was able to make it through another grueling day at work. There had been too many papers to read, too many reports to be filed, too many phone-calls to be made. A few years ago she might have enjoyed the challenge, nowadays she just felt like a blindfolded horse chasing a carrot. There simply was no goal line to be crossed, nothing to be achieved. Stepping inside her car, she felt that once again some of her life force had been drained away.
Driving back home, neon lights flashed and greeted her from both sides of the streets and almost manic advertisements tried to capture her attention. Even with her mind tightly fixed on a certain person, she was distracted on a few occasions. Once, when she stopped in front of a junction, some deviously engineered mouthpiece of capitalism caught her eye.
A travel agency had a special offer to Hawaii.
For some time Youko entertained herself with the thought of her and Sei lying in the golden sand, once in a while lunging into the warm ocean when the sun was starting to feel too hot on their skin. They would just lie there and relax for the whole day, Youko would read a book and Sei would do whatever she wanted, and Youko would never let Sei out of her sight. During the evenings they would hang out at the beach bar, drinking pina coladas and reminiscing. Youko could almost hear the screaming seagulls, she could almost see the setting sun reflected on the sea and she could almost imagine how it would feel to wake up well-rested beside Sei every day.
The daydream was so vivid Youko could hardly let it go even when she had finally driven her car in her own parking slot.
Finally, she forced her body to function as she dragged herself out of the car and towards the block of flats. Up the stairwell she went, step by step, her heart almost choking in anticipation.
When she inserted the key to the keyhole with shaking hands, she prayed once more that Sei would be waiting inside.
"I am home!"
Her voice was cheerful, too cheerful to cover her nervousness.
Sei's impish face appeared from the bedroom.
"Oh, I already thought about leaving, because I was starting to believe that you would not come home at all", she said.
Youko smiled so broadly that she wondered whether her face would break apart.
"How could I not come home if you were waiting for me?"
"That was my reasoning, too, when I decided to stay", Sei replied.
Youko nodded and lunged to hug Sei.
"That's more like it, my little meddler."
Having eaten with Sei, Youko felt as if she had enjoyed her meal for the first time in ages. She had cooked the salmon fillet had been to perfection and the cucumber salad had been like a jewel on the top of the crown.
The very reason her life was blossoming again was sitting in front of her, sipping coffee. Sei was wearing Youko's bathrobes, her hair still moist from the shower. Youko felt odd to smell her own shampoo on Sei. The blonde woman did not seem to be bothered by it, however. On the contrary, Sei was repeatedly snatching strands of her own hair between her fingers and smelling them with a curious expression on her face.
"A nice shampoo you have", she remarked.
Youko smiled.
She could have been there forever, just feasting on Sei with her eyes, watching as Sei played carelessly with her hair. She could only guess what Sei was thinking about it all, them being together once again, and Youko was just too curious and too restless to let the time pass without questions being posed and answers given.
"So, what are you up to?" Youko asked.
Sei seemed positively surprised.
"Me? I wonder about it myself, really."
Sei shrugged and took that easy-going impression on her face Youko had seen so many times.
"I can't say I understand why you can just be here and do nothing for the whole day", Youko continued. "Are you working somewhere?"
"Well, I'm certainly not employed the way you are."
"So how do you manage then?"
Sei gave a dry laughter.
"I get some odd jobs here and there, so I am not starving and I can get my rents paid, if that is what you are getting at", she said.
"So you are not married?"
Youko's hearbeat quickened just a little.
This time, Sei laughed loudly and sincerely.
"Do I seem like the typical housewife material to you?"
Youko let out an almost imperceptible sigh of relief and shook her head.
"I don't mean to be intrusive, but I would still like to know what you were doing at the airport. You did not have any luggage with you, so you probably wasn't coming back from anywhere."
"I was there seeing off Shizuka."
Shizuka... It took Youko a while to remember the girl with amazingly black hair. Kanina Shizuka, who had been more or less enamoured with Sei, and Youko could not blame her. Very few back then in Lillian could ignore the White Rose, and Youko herself was certainly not among those few.
"So you two are still in touch with each other?"
Sei nodded.
"She came to visit her parents and I was happy to see her", Sei explained. "She has worked hard in Italy, but she has yet to hit it big."
"Does she still love you?"
Youko bit her lip as soon as the words had escaped her mouth.
Sei raised her eyebrows ever so slightly and her grin looked very natural, but Youko could see she had not been anticipating the question. Youko could sense herself blushing.
"If I may ask, how does it concern you?"
"Forgive me, I should have considered my words more carefully", Youko said apologetically and lowered her head, embarrassment taking over her.
"Jealous?"
Even as Youko was so deeply ashamed, Sei's playful voice made shrills go through her spine.
"You wish."
Her voice was so unconvincing that it would not have deceived even a child, let alone Sei.
"You have changed, Youko", Sei said, her voice suddenly serious. "I can't believe how much."
Youko had been anticipating Sei to continue teasing her, and the direction their conversation had suddenly taken dazed her and she was at a complete loss of words. She stared at her fingernails, trying very hard to figure out something intelligent to say, but failing miserably. She was quite taken aback by her wordlessness, especially because she had been thinking exactly about the thing Sei had just brought up.
Yes, she had changed, yes, she was not the same person as she had been ten years ago. In normal circumstances, she would have explained it to herself as only natural, but at that very moment when she was facing Sei, she was not so certain.
Suddenly, Youko was very afraid.
