Disclaimer: Here I am, still not owning InuYasha! Sigh… if only I did…

Disclaimer (2): I also do not own the one or two lines of lyrics I very subtly implemented in the story from the song after which this chapter was named… Mwuahahahaha!

Author's Note: Thank you all for your reviews! You really have no idea how much it means to me! This time around, I was actually thinking, "Finish the chapter! Those people are waiting for you!" So you see? Reviews do help.

Author's Note (2): Keep in mind that last chapter ended in the year of our Lord One Thousand Nine Hundred and Ninety-Nine… don't ask about the long phrasing– I'm not all too sure myself.

Warning: Lots of angst ahead! Woo-hoo!

Chapter Four: Shadow of the Moon

She was running again, but from what, she wasn't quite certain. The shadows enveloped her mind, bringing her to clamp her eyes shut, determined on seeing nothing around her. Heartbeat pounding in her ears, flashes of memories reeling in her mind, her breathing came in quick, shallow breaths– just enough to keep her moving. Salty tears streamed down her rosy cheeks, her sorrow engulfing her every thought.

She was frantic. Time was running out, and she knew it. The ghosts that haunted her were all too real– predominating every conscious thought she possessed.

"Have to… keep… running…!" Her voice was empty, void of any real feeling save for her rising anxiety– her fear of what was to come. Her breathing was stuttered as she continued panting; gasping for air. The sound of her footfalls steadily weakened as she trudged forward, trying to outrun the demons that plagued the depths of her soul.

Hours seemed to pass as she did everything her body allowed in order to keep running– running from his smile, his voice, his shy, hesitant laughs… and those golden eyes…

She tripped and fell, and without warning, she saw that image of him – the one that was carved into the recesses of her mind – and gasped.

He was laying there, the scarlet blood that so matched his kimono pooling around him, bathing him in it. She watched, horrified beyond belief, as he weakly tilted his head towards her and smiled– a pitiful smile that beckoned her soul to his.

Reaching out, she tried to touch his hair, his face– anything. When she finally came close enough to make some kind of contact with him, his golden eyes dulled and lost the soul that had given life to them, and he slowly dissipated into nothingness, leaving her to wallow in her misery one more time…

Her eyes snapped open, a look of sheer horror writ all over her features. When she finally realized she was awake, Kagome sighed sadly, her hammering heart resounding in her ears. The cool sweat that had perspired on her during her sleep dampened her raven hair and made her look more disheveled than necessary.

Her movements were lethargic, even melancholic. She rose from her bed – the bed that he had slept on so long ago – and gazed longingly out the window towards the well house of her family's shrine– to that place.

The remnants of the dream still lingering in her mind, Kagome closed her eyes, wanting nothing more than to sleep a peaceful sleep with peaceful dreams. 'But I guess that won't happen again, will it? It's never happened, not since then…' She resigned herself, knowing she would never have the beautiful dreams she once had– knowing she would never be able to see him in a better light.

After all, she had been dreaming the same dream for nine years.

Sighing once more, she moved away from the windows, her hand snatching the tear that had been about to fall. It had been the same way for nine years: she would relive her past, mourn her present and regret her future. If that sequence of events didn't take place, it would seem like breaking tradition in her mind.

Suppressing the urge to break down and cry, Kagome quietly dressed herself. 'That's right, Kagome– put on that nice red tank top there with that pressed white skirt. If he saw you, he would probably be pleasantly surprised.'

Shuddering slightly at the thought of those eyes – those golden eyes that so haunted her dreams – Kagome slipped on a pair of neat, black sandals and ambled out of her room.

Souta was in the hall when she got out, wiping the sleep from his eyes as he yawned. He was finally a senior at his school this year – a fact that became increasingly difficult for Kagome to believe every day that passed – though he retained his inveterate tendency of tardiness. It was the only reason Kagome bothered to get up in the morning– to see her brother and talk to him a little every day, since he didn't get home until very late, due to his part-time job and soccer practice. He wouldn't leave until later on anyway, and Kagome was determined to fully cherish the time she had with her loved ones as long as she could. She would never take anyone for granted again…

Shaking herself a bit and putting on a happy face – that façade that had become second nature to Kagome – Kagome smiled at Souta and hugged him. "Good morning, Souta! How are you feeling?"

Hugging her back sleepily, he nearly collapsed on her despite the fact he was almost twice her size. "I'm fi–ine," he responded, his reply stretched as he yawned again. "How–" a yawn interrupted him, "Mm. How are you?"

Every morning it happened, and every morning, she learned to get over it. That one, simple question always seemed so hard for her to answer, because it was the one time every day she bothered to lie– and, well, she really hated lying. "I'm… I'm fine! So when do you think you'll be home tonight?" she skirted any need to elaborate on her answer quite nicely, she reasoned.

"Eh, probably around the same time as usual– nine or so…"

"Ah…" she replied, expected disappointment befalling her once more. "Well, if you come home earlier, let me know beforehand! I'll make you a special dinner, okay?"

He smiled at her, giving her one last squeeze before leaving to the bathroom. "Thanks, sis. I'll try to make it home just a little earlier, all right? Just for you."

She smiled at his retreating form, allowing herself the small peace she greedily took every day. If nothing else, she still had her mother and brother. Her grandfather had passed some years before, towards the end of 2004, when she was just finishing her studies in college. She had been devastated at the event and had refused to come out of her room for days. His death was to be expected, she had known, but still– when it actually happened, she had felt herself deteriorate all over again…

Going down the steps with a lethargic gait, Kagome saw her mother in the kitchen making some kind of delicious breakfast, as was her custom every morning. Greeting her mother when she arrived at the bottom of the steps, she embraced her, relishing in the feeling of security and protection she provided by simply returning the gesture.

"Good morning, dear. How do you feel?" her mother asked seemingly nonchalantly.

She was the only one that had some semblance of what turmoil was raging in her daughter's heart. She had known since the beginning– ever since she had found Kagome screaming and crying at the bottom of the well house, repeating InuYasha's name and how he broke his word– how he didn't love her anymore, because he couldn't remember…

She had been calmly washing the dishes after the rain had stopped, when she seemed to have heard screaming coming from outside. Alarmed, she ran out the door, trying to trace the source of the sound. Deciding it was coming from the well house and that it sounded uncannily like Kagome, she rushed over…

"Kagome?" she cried, frantic, hearing her daughter wailing and screaming, though she couldn't see her. "Kagome, where are you?"

"He doesn't love me! Why do I love him? Why do I–"

Hearing the echoes from the well, Mrs. Higurashi looked over the rim of the well and saw her daughter – her precious, dearest Kagome – sprawled on the ground in a pathetic heap, dirty and blood-stained, her ankle twisting in a direction that was doubtlessly painful with a shin the size of a balloon. Without a second thought, she jumped over carefully, figuring it was crucial not to twist or break anything herself, and hurried over to her daughter.

"Kagome… Kagome! What's wrong? What happened? Please, Kagome, tell me what's wrong!" she pleaded, tears of her own starting to form as her daughter continued to scream and cry, as though she hadn't even noticed her own mother's presence.

"I-InuYasha… Inu… InuYasha! Why did you forget? You told me to promise you, InuYasha! You told me to promise! How could you…?" she continued to bluster in a blur of sound and tears.

Unsure of what to do, not really certain if anything was even going to work, Mrs. Higurashi wrapped her arms around her daughter's shoulders while kneeling on the ground, so that Kagome's body was leaning against hers, her daughter's matted, raven locks under her chin. "Shh… darling, please, stop crying… I'm…"

What was she, exactly? Sorry about whatever had happened to her daughter? Surely, that must have been an understatement. Judging from her daughter's behavior and appearance, something big happened– something absolutely devastating. That in mind, she realized, a grim expression marring her countenance, she would just soothe her child as long as she needed to, figuring there was nothing more she could really do.

"He– He doesn't love me! He doesn't care about me! He doesn't remember me! How…? Why…? What did I do? Why do I still love you, InuYasha? Why do I still love you?" Kagome raged, grasping her mother's clothes in fistfuls, her tears streaming onto her mother's neck and collarbone, her nose running all over her mother's blouse.

"Shh," her mother began once more, rubbing her daughter's back gently, her own tears coursing down her pale cheeks, "my darling Kagome, please stop crying. Your mama's here now, and I love you so much…"

"I'm… fine," Kagome answered edgily, not making eye contact with her mother, knowing any attempt to lie was futile anyway.

Shaken out of her reverie, Mrs. Higurashi smiled sadly at her daughter. "That's… good to hear, Kagome. I'm… glad."

The charade seemed endless, but Kagome refused to let it stop. 'I just… need more time,' was the automated defense and, not for the first time, she doubted herself. 'Yeah, right…'

Glancing up at her mother, who calmly continued making breakfast and fulfilling all the small chores that needed to be done in the kitchen, Kagome coughed delicately, earning the attention she desired. "May I be excused from breakfast? I would like to… pray right now."

Mrs. Higurashi pasted on a tolerant smile on her face– a smile that, predictably enough, did not reach her eyes. "Of course you may, Kagome, but make sure to eat something later, okay?"

Nodding her consent, Kagome made her way out of the house and into the bright morning sunshine.

It was the excuse she gave every day, really. Her mother knew, of course, that Kagome didn't go to the shrine for the purpose of praying, although she did pray most times. In part, she went there to take care of the well house and the shrine, not wanting it to deteriorate. That incentive came in after the death of her grandfather, however, feeling that it was one of the last connections that kept him so close to her heart. In truth, most of her went to the shrine in the hopes of seeing him again.

She went there every day, never missing for any reason. Never caring if it stormed, hailed or snowed, Kagome went to the well house, dropping to the bottom of the well every day to check and see if maybe, just maybe, that would be the day…

Arriving at her destination, Kagome kneeled before the actual shrine, deciding today would be another one of the days she prayed. Bowing her head in respect, she silently uttered the words that always seemed to come to her, but ones she had not thought of herself… 'May you find the love that so captivated you once more, and may you one day remember all that you have lost, InuYasha…'

Finishing the prayer with another bow and clasp of her hands, Kagome quickly rose and made for the shed a little way away from the shrine. Her heart throbbed as unwanted memories pillaged the defenses her mind had carefully constructed, breaking the feeble hold she had on her rampant emotions as images of him hit her all too quickly– as the faint sounds of laughter and better days echoed all around her.

Tears trickled softly down her cheeks as a sad smile made its way to her lips, an air of defeat surrounding her gently, embracing every fiber of her being. She grabbed the broom leaning against the wooden wall of the shed and walked back outside into the morning sun, ready to sweep around the shrine.

She started humming softly, an eerie melody filling the air around her. "Feel no sorrow, feel no pain; feel no hurt, there's nothing gained…" was her idle chant, the tears never ceasing, "Only love will then remain…"

After sweeping and pushing aside whatever leaves had fallen from the trees the night before, Kagome placed the broom back in the shed, finally making her way over to the well house.

Sliding the wooden doors open and closing them shut upon entering the place, Kagome sank to her knees as she did almost every day, already physically and mentally drained. Her eyes drifted closed as she thought of the past nine years– how her once blooming, more or less purposeful life had been reduced to nothing.

She really had tried to get over it. Though she probably hadn't been in the ideal state of mind – having fallen into lapses where she recounted times with InuYasha without ever having noticed – she continued her studies, finished high school, attempted to live that normal life she had so coveted when the adventure had first begun…

It hadn't taken her much time to realize her endeavors were absolutely fruitless– completely inane.

She went to all her high school classes, never missing a day; never falling ill. In her restless, broken mind, a distraction was as dear to her as the air she breathed. Throughout her remaining schooling, she overloaded herself with as much as had been possible: taking the hardest classes, joining an unadvisable number of clubs, participating in every school event, trying out for every sport she could…

To any onlooker, Kagome appeared to be the hardest worker and most dedicated student. To herself, she was nothing more than a desperate girl looking for a reason not to think about InuYasha and all that had happened.

Maybe if she didn't dream that dream every night, she could have gotten over him. Maybe if she didn't have to see those eyes that haunted her so cruelly every waking moment, her heart might have healed– might have overcome the adversities that had been so mercilessly tossed at her. Maybe if she hadn't fallen so deeply in love with him back then, she could have loved another. As it was, however, she had been trapped in a never-ending sorrow, the love she had thought to be so sincere and beautiful now nothing more than the chain that bound her to her misery.

After high school, she had gone off to college, making it into Tokyo University, what with her outstanding achievements and everything, and completed two majors. She had decided to study history, specifically that of the Warring States Era in Japan, along with cultural studies, figuring it would be the next best thing.

She smiled faintly– a smile that held no humor at all; a smile that was devoid of even the smallest wisp of happiness, all the while she remembered…

She would go every day, never caring about her mother's warnings that it wasn't good for her; that she shouldn't…

Every day she went and closed the doors behind her, always making sure that no one would come and disturb her– wanting to make sure that no one would take her away.

And really, she only feared that because they had tried to take her away.

After her grandfather had found out, he had taken it upon himself to try to close the well. His main reason for doing this was because he had been seeing Kagome with dirty, and sometimes even scraped knees for a good few months, but he had never known why. His daughter had finally told him – albeit, vaguely – about what had happened to Kagome, his beloved granddaughter.

It had been nearly impossible to stop him, but he had finally relented in his plan to close the well. What had convinced him were his granddaughter's tears– her look of sheer horror when he had explained what he was about to do in the well house.

That day, long after her grandfather had left and she had pushed back her fearful tears, Kagome had carried on with her daily tradition, hope filling her heart as it always had when she plunged down…

and disappearing as it always did when she hit the cold, solid earth.

She had sighed and let a few tears slip, her heart breaking more with every drop. She had sat down calmly and made herself comfortable against the wall of the well, stretching her legs, wrapping her arms around her middle and letting her head fall back against the hard wood.

And then she began to recite the events of her day, as she had accustomed herself to doing, ever in the hopes that her voice would reach him.

It had been strange, that day. Although she did what she always had – at least, what she had been doing since the day everything went wrong – something was different. After having taken a pause in telling the dealings of her day, Kagome had thought she heard the faintest rustling of clothes… a sigh…

She had bolted to the ground, pressing her ear as close as she could against the earth, her heart lodged in her throat. Another sigh…

Her heart was racing, her mind screaming at her, telling her she wasn't hearing anything– that she shouldn't raise her hopes so high. Pressing her head even closer to the ground, she heard nothing.

Tears moistened the soil beneath her, her head never moving. She waited for what was probably a couple of hours, desperately, despairingly. Much to her dismay, only her sobs echoed in her ears…

Shaking her head slightly at the saddening memory, Kagome rose from her place on the ground, wringing her hands as she neared the lip of the well.

Although she had jumped down the well every day since she lost him, today seemed different. There was a certain anxiety in her heart – a certain dread – that she just couldn't shake off. Unsure as to why she felt so antsy, Kagome walked more slowly than ever towards the well.

Was she afraid of disappointment? Did she think she couldn't handle the pain one more time?

She fell to her knees in front of the well, her hands clasping onto the brim, just like she had that fateful day. 'No,' she told herself wearily, trying once more to convince herself of the lie, 'I can handle it– I'm okay. This isn't different from any other day. Even if I don't make it through, I'll be okay…'

A pang shot through her heart the likes of which she hadn't quite felt in years. It was painful, to have to remember– to remember his name, his voice, his golden eyes… Everything about him sent daggers to her heart – her poor, bleeding heart – and then she realized: if she failed just once more, she really, truly would break. She'd never be the same again…

Gathering her courage, she stood up. She knew this was the final time. After this, she would never – no, she could never – try again. 'Still… what if today's the day I get back to him? What if today's the day I'll be… saved?'

In a moment, she jumped over.

Eyes closed, heart throbbing, body shaking– Kagome was nothing short of frantic. This time, if she didn't make it over, it absolutely would be the end of her.

She landed.

Not wanting to open her eyes, not wanting to see where she was, Kagome kept her eyes closed. She listened quietly to her heart breaking for the final time; listened attentively as she heard her soul tearing; paid the closest attention as she took in the sound of…

Song?

Her eyes snapped open.

A sob– no, not a sob: a cry– no, not quite that either– spilled off Kagome's lips as she saw vines in front of her, a single, tiny butterfly her company. Her body was shaking beyond her control, hands quaking as she reached for the closest vine, heart ready to burst as her mind raced for answers.

Gripping the vine with all her might, she pulled herself up one step at a time, sunlight hitting her as she reached the top of the well.

Hauling herself up, Kagome sat on the brim of the well, savoring the feel of the place, tears flowing freely down her cheeks as she truly smile for the first time in nine years. She looked about her, taking in the verdant fields and blooming flowers, delighting in the feel of the warm sun, taking pleasure in the beautiful sound of song.

After what might have been hours – or perhaps they were only minutes? – Kagome rose from her place, standing tall and feeling like nothing could be better. She walked forward, heading to the one place she knew she had to see– Goshinboku.

Upon arriving, she climbed the tree's roots, placing her hands on that spot– the spot to which InuYasha had been pinned over sixty years before.

She heard a rustling to her left, and she turned to meet the intruder that would dare interrupt her rediscovery. No one came out, and a small shiver raced up and down her spine. Who was there?

Stepping off the roots of Goshinboku, Kagome ambled to the place in which she presumed the intruder to be. As she neared the area, a man jumped out at her, and she screamed.

He was an ordinary villager, she figured, but why was he attacking her?

"What are you–!"

She felt herself being tied, despite her valiant struggle against her captor. Before she could finish her question, a hand clamped over her mouth. Alarmed, she tried to wriggle herself out of the man's clutches, but to no avail. After so many years of inactivity, Kagome had lost most of the strength she once possessed. She was still in shape, but nowhere near as strong as she used to be– nothing like she was back in those days.

Before she knew what was really happening, Kagome felt something hit her head hard, and she blacked out.

ººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººººº

Her eyes fluttered open softly, and before her eyes brought her surroundings into focus, she took note of her head-splitting headache. When she tried to reach up to touch the back of her head where she figured she had been hit, she realized her hands were tied. More alarming still was the knowledge that her feet, too, were bound.

Sitting up as best as she could, Kagome looked all around her, her head pounding more with every passing minute. Her eyes fell on a group of rough looking men who all seemed to be talking to someone behind them.

'Am I dreaming…? Am I even really here? Maybe I just hit the bottom of the well really hard, blacked out, and this is all some dream…' As much as she tried to convince herself of that, however, she knew it was a lie. It couldn't be a dream, simply because her curse wouldn't desert her, and no matter the day, she would always dream the same dream…

And then, everything happened all at once.

There was a loud yell – 'It couldn't be…' – and a figure leaped over the crowd of villagers, landing right in front of her.

"But… my lord! Just look at her! She must be a spy! Do you not see her strange attire? We must kill h–"

"Will you just shut the fuck up? Damn!"

She could have sworn her heart stopped beating.

She looked up.

He was looking right at her, golden eyes and all.

"I… Inu… Yasha?"

Author's Note (3): Okay, so this took longer than I thought. I think I actually worked on this chapter a total of four days, but the problem was that I couldn't find time to actually work on it. Those four days were very far and between, let me tell you! In any case though, thank you to all those of you who reviewed! It's because of you all that I actually finished this chapter. With every review comes more incentive to write, trust me! When you help me, you help yourselves. It's a wonderful cycle, if we just all put our part. In any case though, let me know what y'all think, and stay tuned for more! (And for those of you who didn't, read the second author's note! It's important!)

Peace and love!

.:.ZG91.:.