Disclaimer:
All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.Coming out of hiding: I know I am the worst person ever but I was having a really hard time with this chapter. I didn't like the way it was flowing and I still really dislike it and I am sorry if you guys hate it but I thought you deserved an update!
HUGE thanks to all who reviewed last chapter, most reviewed chapter so far! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! Thanks to everyone who put this on alert and in their favourite, bet you're glad it is finally coming into use!
Hope you like this chapter, I am really sorry if you don't! You may see a number of familiar quotes...
Enjoy!
Forever Bound
Chapter Thirty Eight - My Immortal
"Edward?" Bella gasped.
The figure holding Anthony quickly placed him back in his crib and moved towards the window; the moonlight reflecting on their face, which was covered in half healed cuts and yellow bruises.
Bella quickly threw the covers away from her body and made her way towards the window, but she did not reach out for the figure.
"Wh--? H-how? What?" Bella stuttered, unable to comprehend what was going on.
The Edward Bella thought she saw in front of her gave a small shrug and a half-hearted smile. "I promised I would be home for New Year."
Bella simply stared at the man in front of her before she began to shake her head. "No, no. This is not real. You are dead."
The Edward from Bella's imagination took a step forward, "No Be-"
"Yes, you are. I received a letter. I spoke at your memorial service today. I have not heard anything from you for almost two months. You are dead!" Bella began to sob, taking a step away from the Edward her mind had conjured up.
Edward moved closer to her, "Bella it IS me. I promise on my life."
Bella took another step away from him, "But you have no life. Please God, stop this! I cannot bear this!" she cried, placing her hands over her eyes to block the imaginary image of her husband.
When she did not hear anything else, Bella slowly removed her hands only to come face to face with Edward. He grabbed her wrists lightly and Bella gasped; he felt so real, so warm.
"It is me Bella," Edward whispered, "It is me." He caressed her cheek and Bella could not help but lean into it. She had missed the heat of his body against her's almost more than anything. Even if this was a dream, Bella decided that she would cherish every moment; for when she woke up she was sure to go mad with grief.
Placing her hand over Edward's, Bella gasped in shock; he even smelt the same.
"How can it be you?" Bella whispered, scared that anything could tear her away from this dream.
"I survived," Edward whispered in return, breathing deeply into Bella's hair. "I was saved by one of the women of the town."
Raising her head, Bella attempted to look her husband in he eyes, but his eyes were closed as he pulled her to his body; she did not resist this time.
"They saved you? How could a woman save you from all the soldiers who attacked your base?" Bella asked, needing to know how he was able to come to her. The explanation her dream was giving her did not make any sense.
"The woman who made the necklace for you, Claudette, was the one to save me. As I told you in my letters, the town was evacuated but apart from myself and the two other doctors working with me, there were no other medics for miles. Claudette began to feel ill and so sent a letter to the base, requesting some help. I volunteered to go as she had become very dear to me while we were in town together and the other doctors decided that they would be able to cope without me for the day. By the time I had reached her temporary home and figured out what was causing her to feel unwell, night was falling and Claudette insisted that I remained at her home for the night; that it was unsafe to ride in the dark. We did not know right then how right she was, but unfortunately not for the simple reason of falling from your horse.
"We could hear the gunfire that was occurring at the base in the middle of the night, even though we were a good ten miles away. I instantly knew that our base had been ambushed and was about to return to help the injured but Claudette prevented me, calling me mad for even thinking about it." Even if this was just a dream, Bella instantly felt indebted to Claudette.
"She demanded that I stayed with her until we heard news that the adversary soldiers had left and it would be safe for someone on our side of the war to leave. The mail was cut off and the German army refused to leave our base, meaning there was no possible chance for me to get in contact with anyone.
"Claudette provided me with her late husband's clothes, meaning that I could blend in with the relocated visitors, I would no longer stand out as a medic. It meant that although I could not talk or contact anyone, I was able to leave the house and provide food for myself and Claudette without being caught."
Bella pulled away from her husband and lightly ran her fingers along Edward's cuts and bruises, quickly pulling her hand away as Edward winced slightly. There were purple bruises right under his eyes and cuts were scattered along his cheeks, with a large gash across his forehead.
She wanted nothing more than to kiss them, to heal them, but Bella knew the moment she attempted to do such a thing was the moments she was fly head first into insanity. She could not do that yet; she needed a little more time with her husband.
"If you were never caught, how on earth did you get all these bruises? You are dead; this is what you looked like when you died!" Bella suddenly realised, pulling away from Edward even more, but he tightened his grip around her; making it impossible to escape.
"Working as a doctor had a number of benefits. I heard rumours from the soldiers that one tactic the Germans had taken up was that of punching anyone they came across as hard as they could in the gut. Unable to fight the impulse, the man beaten will cry out in his native tounge and reveal his side of the war." Edward explained, his eyes closed once more, "Knowing this, I asked Claudette to only speak to me in French, and as I had been speaking French daily for over six months, I managed to control my urge to speak English. However, one evening when I was checking the traps for rabbits, a group of German soldiers approached me. I did not look suspicious in my French clothes but I guess they were simply looking for a bit of fun.
"They hit me in my gut as per usual and I yelled out with the typical Belgian response, merde, but that did not stop them. They began to kick and punch me, spitting on me. When they finally left me alone I had all these cuts, two fractured ribs and a sprained ankle. I managed to hobble back to Claudette's home before I passed out from the pain. A few hours later when I had woken up, Claudette had placed a split on my ankle and wrapped my chest in bandages. She is old and does not know much about medicine but we did the best we could. That is why it has taken me so long to come home, but Bella I want you to know that I would have tried everything to come here sooner if I could have." Edward looked into Bella's eyes, pleading with her to understand him.
Bella stared right back at him and saw the pure love and honesty in his eyes. She slowly nodded her head in agreement, "I know you would have Edward and I love you for it." She took a deep breath, "Now that I have the truth, I am ready to let you go. I am ready to wake up."
Edward blinked in confusion, "Wake up?"
"Yes." Bella nodded, bracing herself for the pain she was sure to feel.
"Bella, you are not asleep," Edward told her slowly, confused as to why she would think such a thing.
"Yes I am. You are dead, I know you are. This is just my subconscious taking me into the pits of misery, but if it means I get to spend more time with you, I will happily take the madness," Bella quickly told Edward, waiting for the jolt of sleep ending.
"I thought I just explained to you that I survived? How can you still believe you are imagining this? That you are still asleep?" Edward took her face in his hands once more, trying to make her understand this was real.
"Edward, if you have to leave I wish that you would just leave. Your presence and memories are still here and it will not leave me alone. I do not think I can take dreaming of you anymore. I am beyond relieved that you came to me one last time but these wounds will not heal, this pain is never going to leave me. You telling me that you are actually here is too much. Please leave!" Bella squeezed her eyes shut, unable to watch Edward fade away in front of her.
His hands did not disappear from her face and she could still feel his body against hers. Bella slowly opened her eyes and found Edward staring down at her, his eyes full of sadness.
"Please Edward! I assure you it is going to be extremely hard to cope with this, please do not make it any harder for me! Please let me wake up!" Bella cried, tears running down her face.
"You are not asleep Bella, and I am not dead. I am here, and I love you. I have always loved you, and I will always love you. I was thinking of you, seeing your face along with Alicia's and our son's in my mind, every second that I was away."
His mouth was on hers then, and Bella could not fight him. Not because he was so much stronger than her, but because her will crumbled into dust the second their lips met.
When they finally parted, Bella looked at the Edward before her. Could it really be her husband? Could he actually be alive? Could the letter have been wrong?
"Edward?" Bella questioned again, finally starting to believe that maybe it was all real; not just a hideous dream.
"When you cried as Alicia's life hung in the balance, I wiped away all of your tears. When you screamed as James attacked you, I fought him and all of your fears away. I held your hand through Alicia's birth and you still have all of me." Edward rushed out, "What else do you need me to say that will prove it is me here with you, that this is real?"
Bella looked at her husband and, at long last, saw the truth staring her in the face. It was Edward. He had come back to her. "Edward!" Bella cried out as she threw herself into his arms, knocking them both backwards.
She covered his face with kisses, rubbing her hands up and down his body, enjoying the warmth it provided. She had been cold for so long but it was finally beginning to change. "It is you, it is you," she repeated, in awe of the fact he was here with him.
Edward pushed the stray hairs away from her face lovingly and gazed into her eyes, "It is me."
Their crash to the floor and subsequent conversation had led to Anthony waking up once more, as he began to sob due to the noise. Bella and Edward tore their attention away from each other and focused on their crying son.
As Edward stood staring in wonder at the crib, Bella gathered Anthony into her arms and began to soothe him. "Shh little one. We are sorry; we did not mean to wake you. Everything is okay, go back to sleep my love." Edward could do nothing but stare at the life Bella held in her arms. It was their son.
Yes, Edward had held him, but only very briefly and he knew nothing about the whimpering boy. He did not even know his son's name.
It was almost as if Bella could hear Edward's internal struggle, as she made her way towards him with their silent but curious son. She began to and him to Edward, and he quickly made a cradle with his arms; instantly loving the weight of his small son in his arms.
"Edward, meet your son Anthony, Anthony, meet your Papa." Bella whispered, smoothing the few strands of hair on his small head.
"Anthony?" Edward questioned, unable to tear his eyes away from the child in his arms. As Edward stared at him, Anthony stared right back, as though he was memorising his father's face.
"Yes, Anthony. After his father," Bella clarified softly. "He is never this good, he must already know you are his father," she smiled up at her husband as he questioned her.
"Is he a difficult baby?" Edward asked, unable to believe such a thing as he held onto a silent Anthony.
"No, not at all. He loves spending time with our family and does not seem to be bothered by large crowds. The only thing that upsets him is when someone other than myself or Alicia is holding him. He will cry until his poor body can take it no more and he passes out. He must know you are his father because I have never seen him so peaceful in another man's arm," Bella quickly explained.
Just then, Anthony began to whimper, causing Edward's heart to deflate. He had hoped what Bella had said was true, that Anthony had recognised his father but the soft cries instantly contradicted such ideas. What could he expect? Anthony was upset if he was held in a stranger's arms, and that was exactly what Edward was; a stranger.
"Do not look so panicked Edward," Bella laughed, reaching for their son once more, "He does know you are his father, he is simply hungry. He has not had anything to eat in about five hours!" Bella settled herself on their bed once more and Edward quickly joined her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and gazing down at Anthony while he ate; just like he used to do with Alicia when she was as small.
They sat in silence for what felt like hours; enjoying the feeling of being together once more. As Anthony finished feeding, Edward stretched his hands out, "May I?"
"Of course!" Bella grinned, passing her dozing son to his father to be burped. Watching Edward be a father once more caused her heart to swell. "It is lovely watching the pair of you together," she commented, "You are so good with them."
Edward smiled at her slightly as he cradled a sleeping Anthony in his arms. Bella placed her head on his shoulder and watched as Edward traced the outline of Anthony's face with his finger. Their family was almost complete once more and Bella could not believe it. She desperately wanted to wake up little Alicia, but she knew that would not be fair to the small one year old. She could see Edward in the morning.
"How could you believe I was dead Bella?" Edward asked suddenly, his voiced full of pain.
Bella removed her head from his body and looked down, suddenly finding the quilt fascinating. "I did not at first. I remembered you telling me that I would have felt it if you died so I ignored the letter. Esme did not think it was fair on either me or Alicia if I continued in this way, talking to Alicia as if you were coming home as Esme truly believed you would never return. She sat me down and told me that the army do not make mistakes with letters such as these, and that for the sake of Anthony's health, I should accept the fact that you were no longer alive." She explained, feeling guilty at ever doubting his words.
"After all the thousand times I have told you I love you, how could you let one word from my mother break your faith in me?" Edward asked. "I told you that I would return to you, that I would survive the war. I told you that you would feel it when I died. Did you feel anything?"
"No," Bella replied quietly. She felt like a small child being scolded.
"I could see it in your eyes when you first saw me, you honestly believed that I was dead; that I would never return to you. The most absurd, ridiculous concept- as if I could ever die without you in my arms."
Bella felt the need to defend herself, "If I let myself hope, and it came to nothing that would have killed me. If you had been part of my imagination, so vivid and life like, the wounds in my heart would never have healed, the pain would be too real for me to ever forget it and move past the mourning. Believing that you were dead seemed like the easier option in the end. Even though I wished with my entire body and soul that you were alive, you had not contacted us in almost two months, we had been told that there were no survivors. It was easier to believe you had died fighting for the good that discover one day that you had survived and moved on with your life, with your love; forgetting about me."
Edward stared her right in the eyes, and when he spoke, his words went to her very soul, "Bella, I will love you forever. There will never be a time when I want anyone but you, and if we are apart, I will die trying to return to you. There is not one single person in this world that I want in my life more than I want you, Alicia and Anthony." He took a deep breath, "Before you, Bella, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars—points of light and reason. And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I could not see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything apart from returning home to you and our family."
Bella had tears pouring from her eyes as her body wracked with sobs. She did not know whether they were sad tears or happy tears; her body was overrun with too many emotions.
Noticing the state he had put his wife in, Edward quickly shifted Anthony into one arm and pulled Bella closer with the other until her head was resting on his chest; her tears soaking through his shirt. "Shh, shh my love. I am so sorry for upsetting you. We should not focus on what has past because we need to focus on the future; on the future of our family. We have each other again and our beautiful children and that is all that matters. Please do not cry my angel."
Bella fisted her hand into Edward shirt as she tried to pull herself together. Edward was right; they needed to focus on the positive aspects of life. She had gone through enough heartbreak in the past month to cause even the most heartless person to weep. But all that was over now, for Edward had returned to them once more.
"Tell me about Anthony. Tell me every little detail about him," Edward pleaded, wanting to change the direction of their conversation.
"He was born on December the twenty eighth after seven hours of labour. I wa—" Bella was interrupted by her chamber door slamming open and bouncing off the wall, as a small, nightdress clad girl stood in the doorway, tears staining her cheeks.
She made her way over to Bella's side of the bed without noticing Edward and stuck her arms up in a request to be lifted onto the bed. She cuddled into her mother's side as Bella wiped away the crusted tears that adorned her cheeks.
"Bad dream Mama," she whimpered, sticking her thumb in her mouth and beginning to suck.
"Oh baby, I am sorry to hear that!" Bella sympathises, "Do you know what will make you feel better?" Alicia shook her head, "Look who is back." Bella raised her hand and pointed at her Papa, who was staring at Alicia in awe.
Alicia followed her mother's gaze and was met with the sight of her father for the first time in months. She blinked as Edward stayed stock still. Bella noticed that his eyes were slightly bloodshot.
"Papa?" Alicia questioned. The tears began to fall from Edward's eyes as all he could do was nod. His little girl remembered him!
Bella quickly removed Anthony from his father's arms as Alicia launched herself at her Papa's chest, crying out in glee. Edward quickly engulfed her small body in a large hug, kissing everywhere his lips could reach.
"My darling daughter. Papa has missed you so much," he was able to sob out.
Alicia raised her head from her father's chest and patted his cheek clumsily, "Cry no Papa."
"You have grown so much little girl. Do not tell me you did everything while Papa was away?" Edward joked with his daughter, pretending to take her nose and making her giggle, "Did you look after your Mama and brother like I asked?"
Alicia nodded enthusiastically and began to explain to Edward in detail, as much detail as such a small child could, everything that had been happening since he was away.
As Bella listened to Alicia explain her life story to Edward, who made noises and gasps at the right time, she gazed down at her son. Bella had her family back. For the first time, Bella and Edward were complete with their two children.
Life was perfect once more.
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Sorry if you hate it. I'm sorry if the layout is weird, FF is playing up and won't let me fix it!
So, good news: Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart have apparently confirmed they are a couple. I don't believe they said it but a big Robsten supporter :) What do you guys think?
Until next time :)
