Disclaimer!

okay, so in honor of the AHH-MAZING eclipse trailer that was released today (honestly, if you haven't watched it, go now! and I mean NOW!), I thought i'd update

and since it such an important chapter *cough* EDWARD'S BACK *cough, cough*

so, I won't keep you any longer, other than to say Thank's soooo much for the amount of reviews from the last chapter! you guys are all awesome! keep it up now that Eddie-poo's back and is here to stay! (for a while)

so, without further adieu, here's EDWARD....okay, Alice first! :)


I So Do Not Need More Pressure!

"OMIGOD ALICE! I MISSED YOU SO MUCH! AHH!" We both made a running leap for a hug, and, of course, she got to me even over all the bags first. "Alice! What are you doing here? Is Edward okay? How's Jasper? Wait, does this mean we have to go to Italy? NO! We can't go to Italy! I haven't jumped off of any cliffs!"

"Well, I see that you haven't gotten over your rambling instinct. Or panic, for that matter." We were still hopping up and down in a hug. I missed her amazingly true comments so much!

But I still had business to attend to. I stopped and gave her my most serious look. "Is Edward okay?"

She just rolled her eyes at me. "Duh, he's fine. Scheduled back to beg for you to take him back at any moment. Well, right after he stops robbing all the book stores around Rio. It's pathetic the way he's stacked up all the books and other stuff he's got in that tiny apartment. Idiot."

Wow, I remember Edward said he would take all the Twilight paraphernalia in the world if it helped me get over him, but I didn't realize he was actually being serious. That's actually kind of sweet in a demented sort of way. I realized Alice said something to me, but I was too zoned out on Edward to notice. "What?"

"Ugh, do you ever listen? I said you are not leaving one of our, meaning Ava, Angel, or myself sight for the next couple of days just in case you get any bright ideas about cliff jumping. Got it?"

"But! But I promised Jacob I would—"

"And who is the person that Bella in the book is waiting for when she jumps?" Dang it, she has a point.

"Jacob."

"And who pulls her out of the water mere seconds after chasing the certain vampire that is out to kill her towards that very beach?"

"Jacob." She went on, but I decided to tone her out again and look around at all the bags she'd piled up through the living room. Chanel. Banana Republic. Lots of Gucci. And a couple Betsy Johnsons. There were a couple other stores that I had no idea who the heck they were, plus there was a huge dress bag that bulged like a wedding dress was stuffed in it. Oh, Alice, I'm going to kill you. Again! "Alice, is that what I think it is?" I pointed at the dress bag.

Alice rolled her eyes again. "No, it's not your wedding dress. It's Ava's. I happened to pick it up on my way home, plus our bridesmaid dresses. I would have gotten yours but I have the feeling you're not going to say 'yes' when my brother proposes." She shrugged.

Well, I'm not sure what I'm going to say actually. I'm pretty sure I'm going to be so mad at him, I won't even be on speaking terms with him. Or I might be so relieved that we're both alive and together that I might just say yes right in my bedroom.

"Good grief Bella! What is the matter with you? I'm pretty sure I left you in better condition than this, plus Jacob and Ava were here to keep you in shape. What happened?" Alice sounded surprisingly like my mother. Scarily like my mother, in fact.

I didn't really have an excuse except my almost meltdown this morning. "I saw Sam and Emily today. Plus, I just keep thinking that Edward's going to be back here soon, and I'm not sure if I can handle that. I mean, of course I still love him, but I'm so mad at him I just don't know what to do!"

"Do you still not understand what that means?" Ava came bursting through the front door just then. Just so you know, I think I need to go to the bathroom really bad right now. I seriously thought that Victoria was bursting through the door. "You love him, you dope! You can be mad at him at the same time! It makes great…sex…just so you know." She whispered the word so no one else in the house could hear it.

"Ava! So that's why I couldn't find you! You blocked me out because you were with Angel!" Alice narrowed her eyes at her, but then quickly turned the frown into a smile and gave Ava the same kind of squeal-y hug that I'd gotten. Only they were moving faster and talking quicker. "You rotten girl! I missed you! Oh, I picked up your dress, you're going to love it! Oh, and Bella? I got a little something for you to wear when you see Edward. It'll make him weep actual tears from leaving you when you look that fabulous." Of course she did. Then she pulled it out.

"Alice! There's no way I can wear that! Unless I have some pants to go with it! It's a shirt!" The 'dress' was pretty, but really short. And when I mean short, I'll be surprised if it actually covers my bottom. It was one of those empire waist dresses, with black material covering to top, a big belt, and then not nearly enough blue silk bottom part. It was really quite cute, but there was no way it would fit me.

"It is not! It will fit you perfectly too. You'll just have to find out when you wear it to see Edward." There was no use arguing, I could tell with her voice. Besides, they could just force it on me if they really wanted to.

"Fine. Whatever." I finally got to roll my eyes at her. But I was still happy that she was back. "So, what's on the agenda for tonight? Because, honestly, I need some fun besides just running around pissing off werewolves."

Alice sent a shocked-slash-surprised look towards Ava, who just shrugged like it was no big deal. "Pissing off werewolves?"

"Well, mainly Paul. He's just a pain in the butt. I got to use the line from the movie and everything!"

"Jeez, this is what happens when I leave. Well let me tell you, I am not going to let you mess up this story anymore! Well, except for the jumping off of a cliff, that's just not going to happen. But, anyway, let's go to the house. I just have to get my closet up to date and we have to have a girl's night, which means no Angel. If Bella and I are without our men that means yours has to vamoose too." Alice and I both looked towards Ava wondering what her reaction would be. Thankfully, she didn't throw anything around, which was always a good thing. She just got a pouty look, which was easily ignored.

"Fine." Well, that was easy enough. She wasn't happy about it, though.

Which was the way she looked for the next couple of days. Alice pretty much made us spend quality time together for the next two days without fail. She came back to school and everything. She had Ava persuade the secretary that she'd truly been here for the past couple of months. The only bad thing about her coming back the day before spring break was that we all knew Mike was going to ask if Jacob was dating me.

But he didn't get a chance. We literally ran every time he got remotely close to us.

Speaking of Jacob, I even had to call him and tell him that I couldn't come to La Push because, and I quote, Alice forbids it. Until she had to go hunting at least, which was when I had to have Jacob come pick me up in that ugly car of his.

"I thought that psychic vampire was going to keep you hostage until the red-head was caught." Jake laughed at me.

I rolled my eyes at him. "She's just worried. And freaked out that if anything happens to me, then something might happen to Edward, and then everyone would be upset. It's just about keeping everything under control. Plus, I'm due for a mental breakdown any day which has everyone on edge. Alice even mentioned something about going to the airport …" I shrugged. I still had no idea what that one meant. She'd randomly gone into vision mode yesterday and, with a grin in my direction, said that she had to go to the airport soon. But I wasn't allowed to go with her. Maybe Jasper's coming to town. Like I said, I have no idea…

"Mental breakdown?" Jacob asked with some concern. Man, he looked beat. He's probably had four hours of sleep in the past two days. Poor thing!

"Yeah, I schedule one every month or so. You might have to start if you don't get some sleep soon." I nudged him and, seriously, he almost fell over.

"I'll get around to it."

"Sure you will." He tried to take my hand, but, unlike Bella, I was sticking to the plan of not leading him on, so I moved away before he could try. I thought he might get mad, but, like I said with the plan, he pretty much expected it. "I can't believe you guys are so hot." Despite his tiredness, he still was a guy. He raised his eyebrows too suggestively. I would have slugged him, but I felt no inclination to head to the emergency room today. "I meant temperature, you moron!"

"Right…yeah, we run a little warmer than the normal people. About one-oh-eight, one-oh-nine. I never get cold anymore. I could stand like this"—holy mother of God, those abs—"in a snowstorm and it wouldn't bother me. The flakes would turn to rain where I stood."

"Rub it in, why don't you? Plus your little healing act is another one of those wolf things…you know, real wolves don't do anything like that."

"You wanna see the 'little healing act'?" He rooted through the glove department, but before he could he even pull that knife out, I grabbed him arm and shoved him back as hard as I could.

"Not a chance in hell do I want to see you cut yourself! That's disgusting!" I screeched despite the fact that we were in such a small space. "And I'm pretty sure that's unhealthy. Mentally, anyways…"

Jacob didn't even look fazed by my little outburst. "Fine. It's a good thing we heal, though. You can't go see just any doctor when you're running a temperature that should mean you're dead."

"Yeah, I guess so…is that why everyone's so worried about Quil? I mean, that and the fact that he was just as big as you and Embry are."

"That, plus Quil's grandfather says the kid could fry an egg on his forehead. It won't be long now. There's no exact age…it just builds and builds and then suddenly—"Wow, maybe I should bring this up with Paul. It'll be interesting to see his reaction to all of this. "Sometimes, if you get really upset or something, that can trigger it early. But I wasn't upset about anything—I was happy."

"Jake, you really don't need to tell me all of this. I already understand most of this stuff about werewolves, but I don't want to hear about how I made you turn early. And don't say that it wasn't my fault. If I hadn't have been around, then maybe this wouldn't have happened so early. I'm sorry, so so sorry. I'm so sorry that I've made you this miserable. I'm a horrible horrible person and, really, I should be able to stop all of it."

I was already crying then, of course, and didn't swat Jacob away when he put his arm around me. "Bella, calm down. I'm not miserable. Not anymore. Not now that you know. That was hard, before. Please stop crying…I see what you meant about that monthly breakdown." Thanks for trying, Jake. I just got a thought, what if my monthly breakdowns have to do with that other thing that comes once a month? That would just about explain everything, except why I always feel like there are splinters poling me in the chest every time I hear about Edward.

Ow, like that!

"Ha, ha," I sniffled and wiped away the tears before Jacob could, "Fine, I'll stop if you tell me why Embry was so in awe over you apparently phasing in the air."

Jacob didn't look at all happy to be talking about it, but I'm pretty sure he didn't want me to start bawling again. "It's just that it comes so much easier to me then the rest of them. It sort of makes me feel even less human that Embry or Sam. Sometimes I'm afraid of losing myself."

Despite the fact that I remembered that happening in the movie, I couldn't stop my outrage. "Jacob! That's one of those things that just does not apply to you. You could never lose yourself. But there must be something that's good about it. I mean, at least you're not just an average mortal who trips over their own feet all the time."

Jacob, who seemed to be very happy with my assurances, rolled his eyes at me. "Bella, you're the only average mortal who trips more than you stand up straight. But, the absolute best part is the speed."

"Better than the motorcycles?"

"There's no comparison." Ha, I bet if and when I turn into a vampire, I will run all the way to Canada. I thought the motorcycles were amazing, but if I could run that fast myself…oh, boy, I cannot wait! "So, tell me something I don't know. Something about vampires. How did you stand it, being around them? Didn't it creep you out?"

"Not nearly as much as being around werewolves did." Ah, sarcasm, how I love you! Jacob, on the other hand, didn't love it. "Fine, no it didn't creep me out at all. I love them, they're like an extension to my human family."

"Why did your bloodsucker kill that James, anyway?" He asked suddenly. I'm pretty sure that was in my explanation yesterday.

Whatever. "He was out for me. Apparently, as I've tried to explain, I smell delicious to vampires. Remember I told you Ava and I weren't really in an accident?"

"You mean, he got that close? To you?"

I looked down at the scar that still almost sparkled when it was in the sun. The cold around it reminded me too much of Edward, so I usually tried not to touch it. "Yeah. He bit me, I told you."

His eyes almost bulged out of his head. I stifled a laugh, since it really wasn't a laughing matter. "But if he bit you…? Shouldn't you be…?"

"Edward saved me. He—he had to suck the venom out, you know, like you would do for a snake bite? Well, the Cullens didn't quite make it in time for Ava, though. She got bit a little bit before I did, and the venom spread too far." Whoops, I sort of forgot to take in account that Jacob would find all of this bad. "Careful, Jake. Easy. Calm down."

No Hallucination Edward popped up when he was shaking. Huh, that's strange. Now that I think about it, he hasn't been around hardly at all! What's up with that? "Yeah," Jacob panted, "Calm."

"You okay, wolf boy? Do I need to go?"

"No, no, no! I'm fine. I promise. Just tell me something else. Give me something else to think about."

Crap it, I've already told him a lot. Maybe I should tell him about the books. Ha, that would be a disaster. Or would it? Maybe he would pull something like Edward and tell me I wasn't the real Bella. Or he might just stick with me. But, even if I did tell him about them, I couldn't tell him about Renesmee under any circumstances. That would end in complete chaos! Shoot, he's still shaking, alright, think of something! "Umm…I need to give you something to read. The thing that I found out about werewolves from. But, not now. You still need to take me cliff diving!" I sort of mumbled the first part, and practically shrieked the second bit.

Oh, God, cliff diving. I've almost felt a pull to go there. Just to look over the side. And now that I realized Hallucination Edward hasn't been around for a while, it just makes me want to go more. But, I promised everyone, including myself, not to do something that stupid. Because, despite wanting to go there on a leisurely vacation, I have no interest in heading to Volterra. "Bella, are you okay?"

That sure snapped me out of it. "What? Why?"

"You just got really pale and you sort of looked like you were about to cry again."

"Oh, just got lost on my train of thought. Sorry...I can't really explain." We sort of had those conversations that ended in me not being able to explain why I kept freaking out more and more when I didn't see Hallucination Edward come around for a couple of days. It was rolling closer and closer to Cliff Day, and Alice and Ava were growing more worried about me too.

Heck, I was worried about myself. Seriously, I've been sitting in Edward's old room for a vast portion of each day, thinking that he'll just come rolling in. I've let this go on for way too long. If he doesn't come back on Cliff Day, I've decided I'm going after him. Jacob already thinks that we're going to go jumping that day, but they're going to come across Victoria, so I'll have no problem getting out of that. Plus Ava can tell all the teachers that I've been there the whole time if I come back late. And, like the non-procrastinator I'm working to be, I've already turned in all of my college applications. I even threw one in to Dartmouth just to see if I could get in on my own.

So, when I woke up on C-Day as I've come to call it, I was ready and rearing to go. First off, I had the house to myself since today was also the big day for the memorial thing in La Push, as fate would have it. Alice was sitting in the rocking chair, thumbing through yet another bridal magazine. "Whose wedding are you looking into now, Alice?"

She didn't even look up when she answered. "Yours this time. How do you feel about silver bridesmaid dresses?"

"Nonchalant, especially since I'm not getting married anytime soon. I plan on telling him no!" She lazily tossed the magazine to the ground, and gave me one of those looks that she definitely knows something I don't. While I may have missed them, I'm sick of them again already. "Alice…what do you know that I don't?"

She threw me an evil smile before getting up and heading towards the door. "I'm going to the airport now just like I told you. I'll be back soon enough, but, in the meantime, go down to Ava's and just hang out there, kay?"

"You know, you never told us why you're going there." I pushed past her to get to the bathroom and start brushing my teeth. Ugh, morning breath!

"I know! See you later, Bella!" She winked and waved before she was gone. I hate psychic vampires, they're so unfair!

But still so demanding. I grabbed my dress that Alice had picked out for me to wear to the thing today, but didn't put it on since I figured that I'd wait until absolutely necessary. This one, she said, would drive Jacob to an early grave. Or he might just have to get neutered. Either way, I'm not looking forward to the reaction.

I called Billy before I left to make sure that Jacob and the pack were already on their way after Victoria, which, they were. Billy told me not to worry yet again, and that he would see me later for the memorial. So, I made my way down to the old Cullen house desperately trying not to go inside and sit in Edward's room again. I think I'm having hallucination withdrawal symptoms!

Anyway, I figured I would be okay around Ava because she would definitely keep me from doing something stupid. At least, I hope she will. I kept on thinking that all the way down towards their cottage until I came into sight of it.

Now let me assure you again, I have no feelings for Angel other than maybe brother-sister stuff. I should not feel jealous of him and Ava in any way whatsoever. But what stopped me, not just moving, but breathing too, was the sight of them together on their porch just kissing like any other couple would do.

Completely normal, right?

I don't know what it was. The fact that the thing that I miss most about Edward is the way I feel when he's kissing me, or the fact of what day it was. But, whichever it was, I snapped.

Like really, I think my splintered heart finally shattered completely right there. For a second, I thought I would just bleed out in the forest, but I found myself able to get up.

Then run straight into the Cullen's house and to Edward's room, where I proceeded to cry and curl into a bawl for God knows how long. I remember thinking that if I just stayed here long enough Hallucination Edward would come and tell me to go home, like he had once before. When that didn't work, and my face probably looked like a ripe tomato, I headed for the piano downstairs.

Edward never taught me how to play my lullaby, but that didn't mean I didn't try to learn. I probably banged on that piano for a while too, hoping again that Hallucination Edward would at least make an appearance. But nothing happened. "Come on! When I don't want you around, you're always there, but now? Where are you?!?" I screamed at the piano, before slamming down the cover and running back to the truck.

I didn't have any idea what to do. I couldn't go back down to Ava's and see them again. I didn't want to jump off of a cliff either, but maybe if I just…

That's it.

Alice's voicemail picked up. "Alice, I'm going to the cliff. I'm not jumping or anything, but I'm going there. I have to see him. I'm sorry." I called Billy too, to tell him that whenever Jacob came around, I'd be around the beach.

I knew exactly how to get there. It was hardly even a hike. Soon enough, I was right at the edge of the cliff, looking down at the swells that were already looking pretty scary. Well, hopefully just standing close will do the trick otherwise, I don't know what's going to happen.

I took off my shoes and jacket and all of my jewelry, and started to walk closer to the edge just waiting. I knew it would come. It had to. "Bella." He was right beside me. Finally! I had to control the urge to throw my arms around him, but I kept chanting to myself that I would probably just go right through him and fall off the cliff.

So, I just kept to the dialogue. Yes?

"Don't do this," he pleaded.

You wanted me to be human, even though he never actually said that. Well, watch me.

"Bella!" I heard his voice further away, like it was an echo this time.

That's weird.

But then it was right next to me again. "Please. For me."

But you won't stay with me any other way. Even if I wasn't going to really jump. This goading on Hallucination Edward thing was a lot more comforting then I realized it would be! Plus, it was calling me Bella all of a sudden.

Something else amazing was the fact that I hadn't actually just tripped and fallen off the cliff yet.

"Please." The voice was getting farther and farther away. "Bella! No!" I heard it scream again in the same echo like voice, but it was closer this time.

But still too far. I figured with my good luck at the moment I could stand on my tiptoes right on the edge. "NO!" Suddenly, pretty much feeling like a truck slammed into my back, two arms slid around my waist with enough force to knock the breath right out of me. "Bella…"

Good thing I hadn't eaten breakfast, because I'm pretty sure the force would have made me barf. "Jeez, this hallucination's getting stronger than I thought." I choked out. Surprisingly, though, the hallucination was giving me all the tingles that the real Edward had whenever he touched me. Man, did I miss those!

Why hadn't I thought of touching the hallucination before this? I'm such an idiot…

"What? Bella, no, this isn't a hallucination." Wait a minute, what? I'm pretty sure my eyes bulged out of my skull, but I didn't turn around. I reached up behind me, and lightly touched whoever it was holding onto me. The hair was as silky as I remembered and still amazing to run your hands through even if there was no kissing involved. The face was ice cold so it was definitely a vampire. But, could it really be…? "Bella…" The way he sighed my name, it has to be.

I flipped around and was faced head-on with those molten ambers that I've had dreams about forever. "Edward, is it…? No, no, no…" I couldn't stop myself, okay?…I just sort of threw my arms around him and starting bawling like I've never bawled before. And it didn't stop there. I felt him kissing me everywhere on my face, in my hair, like he had actually missed me! So, in response, I just buried my head further into his shoulder.

Oh, good God, did he smell good!

I hardly realized what I was actually doing and who I was doing it to until we both heard a noise that pretty much spelled disaster.

"AHOOOO!" The wolf's howl snapped me right back into reality. Holy Crap, Edward's arms are around me. Those amazing arms that give me tingles all the way down in my toes…no, focus! Edward, who left you, broke your heart, is kissing you and you're just going to let him?

Thankfully, I didn't have to take any rash measures because Edward let go of me pretty fast to look around for the wolves. He was going to have some explaining to do!

Without his eyes bearing down into mine, I could finally think straight again. "Oh, my God. Oh, my God! OH, MY GOD!" Okay, well, I was sort of thinking straight. Mostly, I was freaking out. But, hey, he wasn't supposed to be here! The wolves were going to tear him apart now since he's not supposed to be here! Crap it, no!

And, during my freaking, I took a tiny—miniscule, really—step back from Edward.

Bad idea.

Because then I fell. Like the way that Wile E. Coyote does in all the Looney Tunes. One second I was standing on the cliff, and the next I was just sort of standing in the air for a second before time really started moving in uber-slow motion.

I saw Edward whip his head around to see me slowly descending and reach out to grab me. I felt his fingers touch mine, but then—something that scared me even more than gravity—a werewolf reached Edward and threw him back away from the cliff and me.

"Edward!" I screamed all the way down. What a day! First, not only does my heart completely splinter to pieces, my ex-boyfriend shows up and showers me with all the love that I had sorely missed in the past few months, but then I fall off of a cliff that I meant not to, and my ex boyfriend that I'm still madly in love with just might be killed by a werewolf!

Like I said, what a day!

And, you want to know a secret? Cold water hurts when you hit it. Especially when you're coming towards it at a rotating angle. I'm almost positive I broke something! And you know who's fault all of this is? Edward!

If he hadn't shown up I wouldn't have freaked out and backed off of a cliff! If he hadn't have left in the first place I wouldn't have any reason to be in La Push on the edge of a cliff!

But then again…it was my fault. I should have just told him about all of the books which might have stopped him from leaving in the first place.

But, you know, I didn't really have that much time to think about it once the current pulled me right under. I started frantically trying to make my way back to the surface despite not really knowing where it was. Crap it! Crap it! Crap it! CRAP IT! Where is the help, people? Shouldn't Edward be jumping in right after me? Or Jacob for that matter? And which one of those stupid mutts knocked my boyfriend to the ground so that he couldn't save me right now?!?

Wait! Was that him? I saw something in the water coming towards me, and, since my oxygen was beginning to run out, I was praying that it was Edward. "Keep swimming!" I heard his voice as clear as day in my head. It wasn't the real one, but it still gave me a little hope.

So, I tried swimming some more. But I couldn't find the surface anywhere I went. HELP ME! I screamed back at the hallucination. I don't see the surface. Well, at least I got to see you again. I eventually thought as I stopped clawing my way through the water.

"Stop that! Don't you dare give up!"

I'm sorry. Don't forget that I still love you. That I'll never stop, okay?

"Fight! Damn it, Sarah, keep fighting." Hallucination Edward still called me Sarah, but it still made all of those butterflies fly up in my stomach.

Goodbye. And with that, I finally let the darkness of the water pull me completely under not even realizing that the red flame in the water was headed straight towards me.


Ahhh! EDWARD! Edward's back! That was totally the real one, trust me, he bolted out of my basement the second I took the shakles off of him.

JK, so, anyway, go review! and then go watch the eclipse trailer again!

speaking of which, did anyone else think that the new Victoria looks like a 12-year old? Or was it just me?

W/E, go review!

Preview for the next chapter:

"OH!" Jacob's voice finally broke the entire ride's silence. He didn't sound so happy either. Okay, this is a good sign. "Holy crap!"

A very good sign. "What? What is it?" I asked almost jubilantly. Please be here! Please be here!

"Vampire."He spat out. Yes! I jumped out of the truck before he could start moving again. COME ON, BE IN THERE! "Bella, what are you doing?!?" He jumped out right behind me and tried to grab my arm, but my determination was too fast even for a werewolf.

"Edward?" I screamed as I burst through the front door. You have to be here!