(Author's note: We've signed up to write the Kurt-OT3 Big Bang! And you get one guess as to which characters we might find in our threesome. Look for it this summer. But don't panic; the endgame is still Puckofsky. -amy and penthea)
"I think she's pissed about something," Puck murmured to Dave on the way up the sidewalk to Shelby's house.
Dave looked dubious. "How can you tell? She always seems pissed to me."
"Yeah, it's a specific quality to her pissed-ness. I guess I got to know it after a while." He knocked on the front door, leaning against the railing. Sure enough, Shelby's glare seemed particularly focused today.
"I told her not to leave her bike outside overnight," she said, beckoning them into the house. "It wasn't like it was the first time she'd ever done it. I'm just about ready to tell her it's a lesson in natural consequences, but she really would go nuts without a bike."
"What happened to it?" Dave asked.
"Borrowed," Puck replied, with air quotes. "It's not the best neighborhood, yeah, but - you'd think people would leave kids' bikes alone, right? Especially purple ones with flowers on them?"
"Not my first choice," Shelby muttered. She handed them each a glass of water. "Anyway, I saw a circular in the paper about a sale on kids' bikes at Target."
Dave swallowed his water. He didn't know if he dared to say anything, but he couldn't let Beth end up with a Target bike. He looked at Puck. "You can't let her ride one of those," he said. "They probably have princesses on them, or something, but they weigh 30 pounds, and all the parts will be some kind of completely non-standard dimension, so when it breaks, which it will, it's impossible to replace."
Puck met Shelby's skeptical frown. "He knows what he's talking about," he said.
"I'm sorry," Dave said, "It's up to you. But if you wanted, I could help you find a real bike for her that's not too expensive. Second hand, maybe? I know some places to look, even if it's not really the season for it."
"Trust me, man, the cost isn't going to be a problem." Puck rolled his eyes as he set his empty glass in the sink. "She has ridiculously generous uncles, aunts, grandparents... and a hell of a lot of them."
"All right." Dave smiled. "In that case, I saw some little mountain bikes at the bike shop that I think would be perfect. I don't think they were purple, but they had real disc brakes."
Shelby shook her head. "She doesn't need purple. Do you think she'll be safe on a fancy bike like that, though?"
"Safer than on a bad one, I think. She might get a bit more speed, but it would be easier to control. And if it's one that's fun to ride off the road, you wouldn't have to worry about traffic as much."
Puck and Shelby did that talking-with-their-eyes thing in which parents seemed to be expert. Dave could even understand most of it. Shelby said I don't know, it sounds kind of like a big investment for an eight-year-old with lots of wrinkles in her forehead, and Puck replied with an eyebrow, come on, live a little - she's only going to be eight once, and besides, she's generally a responsible kid.
"I can teach her how to ride safely," Dave heard himself saying, and then paused, wondering if he'd gone too far. But to his surprise, Shelby was the one who nodded.
"I think I'd feel okay about it if I knew you were looking out for her, Dave," she said.
"Really? Thank you." Dave still felt out of place and uncomfortable in her house, like he should apologize for something, except he didn't quite know what, and now that he wasn't talking about bikes anymore he was suddenly very aware of it again. But Puck's delighted grin kind of made it all worth it.
They wound up browsing online and making a few phone calls before, with Dave's input, they decided on a "boy's" model that looked like a smaller, simplified version of a real adult sized mountain bike, and a helmet and a bike lock to go with it.
"You should be there when we give it to her," Puck said as they drove to Dick's to pick it up.
"Really? You think..." Dave shook his head. "Okay."
"Sure. She trusts you, and I think you're the clear favorite for actually riding with her. Do you think you could show her how to use the lock?"
"Yeah. I mean, I know how to use a bike lock...but maybe you and Shelby want to be the ones to do the serious lecture part? Isn't that a parent job?"
Puck grinned. "Hey, what's one more parent?"
They actually hadn't had any kind of conversation about whether or not Dave wanted kids, but he figured it was a moot point. Puck did have a kid. She was pretty great, too. And he did think he wanted some, at some point, far into the future. There were all sorts of complications, of course. Kids had been part of his fantasy from way back when he thought he was going to try to be normal, and then later he hadn't been able to even consider trusting himself with a whole person, or thought he'd have the conscience to let a kid go through school, or life, with two dads, especially if one of them was him. But he had to admit that seeing Puck with Beth had changed some things. He pulled himself together. Some day, a very long time from now. And right now, there was a real kid right here that was going to get a shiny new bike.
Dick's had everything they needed, including a helmet in an impressive shade of fuchsia. Dave folded the seat down in the back of the rental car and carefully fit the bike inside. Once they got back to Shelby's, they managed to dredge Beth up from the passing gaggle of neighborhood kids. She was willing to stop once she saw Puck.
"Hey, we've got something for you," he said, pulling her over to sit on his leg. "But I want to talk to you about it first. I heard your bike got stolen."
She gave an adorable eight-year-old grimace. "I totally know who it was," she swore, "but he won't 'fess up, and I don't know where he put it."
"Well, if it turns up, we can deal with it then. But you were ready for a new bike, anyway. The point is, you can't leave it lying around like that. Not this one, especially. Dave picked it out just for you."
Beth's version of the Puckerman delighted grin was so much like her dad's that Dave had to smile back. He tried to school his face into something appropriately stern, and pulled out the lock he had also picked out for her.
"So we got you this, so you can leave your bike safely if you're going in somewhere. You should still take it inside at night, but if you lock it to something, like a tree, you should be okay. So the bad guys can't just pick it up and walk away with it."
"Hey, cool!" She played with the lock, spinning the combination with her fingers.
"I set the combination to my birthday," Puck smirked. "Now you won't forget it. I totally could never remember my Ma's."
Dave showed her how to make sure the lock went through both the frame and the back wheel, not that anyone would probably steal a wheel from a kid's bike, but better to learn good habits. Puck gave her a meaningful stare. "So what do you think's gonna happen if you forget, and leave this bike outside, not locked up?"
"Uh... I don't think I'll be getting another one," she said sheepishly.
Puck glanced at Dave for support. Dave stared back. Really? But he composed himself and tried to look serious. "I think that's a good guess," he told her.
"Okay," she muttered. "Jeez. So where's the bike?"
She hopped excitedly around the trunk of the car and let out a crazed monkey yell when Puck unloaded it. "Blue's my favorite color," she told Dave, hanging on his arm. "Can we ride? Right now? Come on!"
Dave grinned at Puck over her head. "Please?"
Puck's face went red, but he rolled his eyes and handed the helmet to Beth. "Here. Dave can show you how to put that on the right way. I'll go let your mom know."
"Okay, so we need to fix this so it will stay on your head." Beth put the helmet on, and Dave fiddled with the buckle in the back until it was snug. "Don't play with this, okay? If it's too loose, it's not going to do any good. If you need room for a hat or ponytails or something, you can get your mom to help you."
Beth fastened the chin strap, looking solemn. Then she hugged him. She hadn't treated him any differently from other adults in her life. He figured she was a little young for homophobia to be causing problems socially. Still, he'd been reluctant to get too snuggly with her. Not my kid, he told himself, but he hugged her back.
Dave had no idea where he'd heard it, probably some bike magazine, but he suddenly remembered how Beth was always climbing all over everything. "And if you get off your bike to play, or climb trees, you take it off, okay?" He didn't think he should go into detail about what might happen, at least without checking with Puck first. "Always. I'm serious."
"Okay, Dave," she nodded. She gripped the handlebars and swung a leg over, perching on the seat. "This is so cool."
"Wow, you look like a real cyclist. I'll just get my own bike, and then we can go, if your dad's ready." He went to get his and Puck's bikes - actually, both his, but he'd brought the extra thinking Puck might want to borrow it - while keeping one eye on Beth to make sure she didn't get impatient and ride off without them.
When Puck came back, Dave realized that he only had one helmet. Normally he wouldn't make a big deal out of that, at least not if they were only riding at eight year old speeds in the park, but if Puck was going to be on his bike...he wasn't sure if he liked that idea. "Shelby didn't have an extra helmet for you?", he asked, like he expected Puck to have thought about that.
Puck looked startled, and maybe a little guilty. "Uh. You really think I need one?"
"Maybe not, but..." He glanced at Beth. "It's just that if we're going to be strict about her wearing it, you should set a good example, right? You know how much she wants to be just like her dad."
He pushed his road bike towards Puck. He raised his eyebrows at him. "You're going to let me borrow your baby?"
Dave didn't say anything about how Puck seemed to be just fine with Dave borrowing his actual daughter. "Yeah. You'll have to be careful if you take her off the road, but it should be fine. And seriously, you think I'd let you ride the fixie? No brakes, remember?"
"Oh - yeah. I'd totally crash." Puck grinned, like this wouldn't be much of a tragedy. "Okay. I'll be careful."
"I know." He smiled back and nodded towards Beth, who was still sitting on her bike, very ready to go. "We should get going, or I think she might give up and leave without us."
Dave was leaving in four days. It wasn't like he didn't know that, he'd been working on his presentation all week. And planning to do laundry so he'd have his good shirts clean, and making sure he had a suitcase to use. It was impossible to deny that he was preparing to go to a conference.
What he hadn't done was tell Puck about it, and it was getting harder and harder to convince himself that it was not a big deal. He was just going away for a few days for a conference, he told himself. He was not disappearing with no warning again. Except if he didn't say something very soon, he kind of was.
At this point, he would have to apologize for not saying something, and soon they'd start making plans for the week when he'd be gone, so Dave was getting uncomfortable talking to Puck at all. And what if Puck was picking up on that? Then when Dave told him he was leaving, he'd definitely worry about it.
Dave also hadn't talked to Kurt, not since everything suddenly got incredibly complicated, so even if they had made plans to meet while he was there, Dave had no idea if that was still happening. And calling to ask if they were talking, or if that was too awkward, wasn't exactly less awkward.
He just couldn't think about it. Then Puck called on Friday afternoon and left two voice mail messages that Dave didn't answer, telling himself he had to finish his homework first. Then Puck called again. The ringtone was long and loud. Dave sighed and picked up the phone.
"What's the matter?" Puck said, sounding annoyed.
"Nothing," Dave replied.
"Dude, you didn't pick up earlier. I was trying to figure out this weekend. Beth's with Shelby, so we could go camping. Or there was that 5k in Lima. What do you want to do?"
There was no way Dave could answer that and be honest without explaining everything. "I'm not going to be around this weekend."
"Oh."
"Yeah. Actually, I'm leaving Wednesday."
There was a lengthy pause. "You, uh. You have somebody to cover your class?"
That that was Puck's first question kind of hurt Dave's heart a little, but he told him, "It's all set. One of the postdocs is going to teach Thursday and Friday. I'll be back Monday. It's... an academic conference, in Los Angeles."
"Oh," he said again. "That one that was posted on the bulletin board?"
"Yeah. I'm giving a talk on group theory. Lie algebras."
Puck cleared his throat. "You were going to tell me, right?"
"Yeah," Dave said, sounding as miserable as he felt. "I... well, it's not a big deal, right? Five days. We can handle five days."
"Maybe you can," Puck snapped. "Fuck that. Yeah, I bet you were looking forward to a week away. Take a little break, have a couple days without dealing with -"
"Puck. No, what...no." God, this was already exactly the mess he'd been afraid it would be.
Puck took a deep breath. "Whatever. You go ahead, have your conference. I'll be fine."
Dave sat down, or he stopped standing and the couch just happened to be there to catch him. How did Puck get to say things like that when he wasn't there? "Yeah, you will. Because it's really not like that, okay? You remember where I'm going? And you know who else happens to live in Los Angeles? I'm going to have to talk in front of all this people, and deal with Kurt, and you think that's a break?" By the end of that he was almost angry enough that he could handle not having Puck there, not being able to hold him and make sure he was listening. He hoped it maybe was enough.
"I think it's pretty clear what's going on." Puck's voice was stony. "I'll see you when you get back. Or maybe not, you'll have to let me know. Maybe I'll call Kurt and get the scoop myself. He can tell me if I've still got a boyfriend by the end of the weekend. Have a fucking good presentation."
He didn't stick around to hear Dave's response. Dave swore and threw his phone at the couch - gently, so it wouldn't get damaged, of course, but...shit, why did he do that? He picked up the phone, making sure it really was okay. Then he punched the couch instead, feeling like an idiot before his fist even hit it. It was too soft to be satisfying, but hard enough to hurt. He swore again.
He'd have to call him back. Probably right away, because he was not letting Puck sit around thinking that for a moment longer than he had to.
Puck didn't pick up, but Dave expected that. He left a brief message: "I'm just going to keep calling back until you pick up, so you might as well. Because... dammit, you didn't hear what I was saying, and I love you, and this isn't okay."
The second time he called, he hung up without leaving a message. The third time, he said more or less the same as the first, except he added "...and if you don't pick up, I'm going to get on my bike, and I'm going to ride all the way to Lima and show up at your door, about...five hours from now. And if you don't let me in, I'll wake up your sister. I bet she'd love that at 3am."
The fourth time he called, Puck answered. He didn't say anything for a minute.
"You should have told me," he said finally.
"Yeah. I know. I'm sorry."
His voice dropped to a near-whisper. "I love you, too."
Dave swallowed on the ridiculous lump in his throat. "Five days," he pleaded. "Really. It's going to be okay."
"Uh-huh. Well... you need me to take care of Pascal?"
"I'll call you, every day. And you don't have to do that."
"Yeah, like you didn't have to get on your fucking bike and drive to Lima. But you would have, wouldn't you?"
Dave laughed. "I probably would, yeah. I'd get to Dublin or something, before it got really dark and I realized how dumb that was, but then it would be too late to admit it. And..." He stopped, wondering if he was really going to say this. "I mean, if you...it wouldn't be that stupid."
"I think you actually believe that, dumbass." Puck sighed. "Yeah. And... I know you aren't going out there to see Kurt. I'm just going to miss you a hell of a lot. So let me feed your cat, okay?"
"Okay." Dave leaned his head on the wall and smiled. "I'll make you a key."
Dave hadn't expected to be asked to speak at this particular conference. He guessed it was an honor, but really, it just felt like a pain in the ass. His work wasn't going to revolutionize group theory, it was more like a small obscure hole that was boring and unimportant enough to leave until there was a grad student to keep busy, but maybe some physicist might find a use for it, or something. Right now, though, Dave didn't have a lot of motivation to stay focused on his topic.
Puck didn't see Dave off at the airport. He gave the excuse of needing to make up a brown belt test with one of his students, but Dave guessed there were other reasons. It was probably better this way, anyway. It was five days. People left their boyfriends for a week all the time. A big dramatic goodbye scene would be ridiculous.
He'd felt courageous after things with Puck went so well all weekend, so calling Kurt and confirming their plans wasn't so awkward. It didn't go as badly as he'd expected. Kurt had been mild and vague on the phone, as though he had other things on his mind. They hadn't spoken since Kurt's confession, and Dave didn't push him.
"Call me when you're done on Thursday," Kurt suggested. "I've got the evening off, and I'll take you to Rambutan for the best Thai you've ever had. Nothing in Ohio compares, trust me."
"That sounds great," Dave answered, hoping but not really believing that dinner would be as easy as this.
The flight was uneventful. Even the weather wasn't worth commenting on, although Dave had heard it was usually pretty mild most days in Los Angeles. He watched the odd vegetation and vaguely southwestern architecture out the taxi window with a sense of detachment. All he could think about was five days. I can do five days.
The Westin was teeming with academics from all parts of the country: thousands of mathematicians, stuffed into a single building for five days, there to discuss the minutiae of their research. The fact that this actually sounded pretty great to Dave felt like just another sign that he was doomed to eternal geekdom.
Just the sort of guy who attracts a gorgeous karate instructor, right? Puck hadn't even asked what he was presenting on; after hearing about the basics of the conference, he'd left the topic behind. Dave hadn't expected him to make a big fuss about it, but still.
He got checked in at the front desk, picked up his ID badge and conference packet, and was considering finding a restaurant for lunch when he saw a familiar face sporting a blonde beard and talking animatedly to a small crowd of spectators. He was balancing a large, colorful structure that looked a little like a first grade art project, except much more complicated, trying to protect it from the curious onlookers and the more general threat of collapse, while also gesticulating eagerly and pointing out the details of his - whatever that thing was.
His eyes lit up when he saw Dave. "Hey, if it isn't Dave Karofsky!"
"I thought that was you, Vincent," Dave said, reaching out a hand to help steady the structure. "Need a hand?"
Vincent looked worried for a moment, then grateful. He grinned. "Thank you. This thing hasn't really found the stable equilibrium I hoped for. But doesn't it look awesome?"
"Entirely," Dave agreed, because that was exactly Vincent. They wrangled the contraption to an empty table along the wide hallway. "So you stuck with math after all? I thought you might end up in astrophysics for graduate school. Where are you now?"
"Oh, I'm here, at UCLA. Math, obviously, graph theory. As you can see." He gestured at the thing on the table.
Dave looked at it. Then he looked again, from a different angle. It still looked like a lot of wire with bits of paper attached to it. Brightly colored bits of paper that might be post-it notes. "What is that thing, anyway?"
"It's a hypohamiltonian graph. The post-its are the vertices, see? You can pick off any one of them, and voila - hamiltonian. Like those puzzles where you have to draw through all the dots with one line, you know? Want to try?"
"Actually, I was about to head out to get some lunch," he said hastily, before Vincent could rope him into helping with his project. "You want to join me?"
"Absolutely," Vincent enthused. Dave didn't think he'd ever see him less than engaged in everything around him, and he couldn't help but smile.
"I just have a quick phone call to make, and then I'm free."
Vincent arranged babysitting duties for the rainbow structure while Dave called Puck. "I'm at the hotel," he said. "My flight was fine. I'm just hanging out with a friend from undergrad." He felt a little disingenuous, talking about Vincent like they were best pals or something, when they hadn't actually spoken in over two years.
"Cool," Puck said. "Everything's quiet here. Me and Pascal, we're playing some cards and smoking cigars. No cause for alarm."
That was enough to melt Dave into a useless puddle, and he didn't have any control over the stupid grin plastered across his face when Vincent approached him curiously.
"I should go, though," Puck was saying. "The band is rehearsing this evening, and Finn's car isn't working again, so I said I'd give him a ride. Have fun tonight?"
"Should be quiet. I'll call you before bed."
"Bed's gonna be way the fuck too big without you," Puck said, with a sigh. "Love you."
"Uh." Dave gave Vincent a quick look before turning to the side and whispering, "Love you, too." It wasn't subtle enough to pass Vincent's notice, however, and his smile widened.
"Girlfriend, huh?"
Reflecting on it later, Dave thought maybe it was Vincent's unfailing friendliness that decided him, but in the moment, he didn't hesitate. "Boyfriend, actually."
Vincent's eyes widened a fraction, and his lips made a series of shapes that could have been words, if sounds had come out of them. "Huh," he said. "Was - that something I knew, once? Or is that new information? Sometimes I forget who knows what."
"No, I wasn't talking about it much, back then," Dave said. Then he paused. "Wait..."
"Ah. Yes." He smiled. "I was still pretty unaware, myself."
"You?" Dave was speechless.
"What, you've cornered the market on closeted mathematicians?" Vincent made a dismissive motion. "I guess I wasn't thinking much about sex at all until about my junior year of college, anyway. Late bloomer, you know." He gestured at his slim build. "Not that girls were knocking down my door, but - once a couple of them tried hitting on me, I realized I was a lot more interested in the guys on my soccer team."
Dave privately thought that he might have done some door-knocking himself, if he'd been a little more aware of what was going on with Vincent in college, but he sure as hell wasn't going to say anything about it now.
"You still play soccer?" Vincent had been as enthusiastic about that sport as he was about everything. Dave thought he remembered being recruited to to play in some kind of tournament once, Vincent insisting that it absolutely didn't matter that he didn't know the rules.
"Oh, yes. Just for fun, but...that reminds me." He pulled his phone out of his pocket. "I know this is rude, but I have to check how the match is going."
"The match?"
"It's El Clásico, man. Barcelona vs Real Madrid?" Dave didn't bother answering, he didn't know much about soccer and Vincent was too absorbed in his phone to notice him anyway. "YES!" He looked back up, apparently not embarrassed by the loud yell he'd just let out in a fairly quiet room, and grinned at Dave. "Barça, Barça, Baaarça!" He pumped his fist, looking around him like he expected the rest of the crowd to join in the chant, but unsurprisingly at least to Dave, they didn't seem to care.
They agreed on lunch at Mendocino Farms, a few blocks away on 3rd and Grand. "I hear the kurobuta pork is to die for," Vincent expostulated, and Dave couldn't even roll his eyes, he was that earnest. "If you eat meat, that is."
"Yes. I eat meat." Dave felt comfortable enough to relate the story of Roger the cyclist, who expected him to be vegan, and they were laughing by the time Vincent asked, "So, this guy...?"
"Puck." Dave smiled. "We've only been together for...god, less than two months, it feels like more. But we've known each other since we were kids, so...I know he's a good guy."
"Yeah, and I definitely heard you say something that started with the letter L, there, over the phone." He nudged Dave in the ribs. "That sounds pretty serious to me."
"I... yeah, maybe?" Dave thought of Puck at home, in his house, taking care of his cat. He hadn't thought twice about giving him a key. "It's kind of hard, being away. I mean... it's been, what, six hours now? I'm not freaking out yet."
"I miss being in love like that." Vincent smiled a little less enthusiastically than usual. "It's great, isn't it? It's been a while since I met someone who was worth that kind of grin."
"What do they say... like, it happens, when it's time? I don't know. I was never much into all this romantic bullshit. Except apparently, I am." Dave shook his head as Vincent laughed. His head felt crowded, suddenly, with all the things about Puck that were part of his life: the math class, Lima and Columbus, the dojo, Indian food, Beth... "He's even got a kid. She's almost eight."
Vincent's eyes widened. "A kid? How old did you say this guy was? And you're not freaking out about that?"
"Well, he had her when we were in high school. I guess they always just came as a set." It was a good question, actually. Shouldn't he be freaking out about dating a guy with a daughter? He wasn't ready to be a father, not even a pretend one.
"Dave... hey, Dave. Calm down." He felt Vincent's hand on his shoulder, and he sat back in his chair, trying to breathe normally. "Jesus, did I break you there or something?"
"No, I'm fine." He shook his head. He thought about Puck and Beth and riding bikes in the park. That had been good. That was real, not whatever he imagined in his head miles and miles away. "She's a great kid. It works." He took a drink from his glass of water, and put it down again. Vincent was still looking concerned. Dave smiled. "Really, it's okay. I guess...a lot of strange things happened, and we just got used to it."
"That's life, huh?" Vincent nodded.
And maybe it was? Maybe his life was just another story, like so many others, and whatever he chose to do would just be...another strange thing on the list for people to get used to. Maybe it didn't have to be such a big deal. Two months ago, that idea would have seemed irresponsible, careless, even impossible. But here he was, doing everything that wasn't expected. He was in love with a guy who'd turned his life upside down, he was telling someone he really barely knew all about it, coming out to him without a second thought, and the world hadn't ended. People were chatting and eating their sandwiches and absolutely nothing terrible had happened. Maybe nothing was going to happen. Life - that's life - might just go on. Dave laughed.
"Yeah," he said. "I guess it is."
