Really short chapter, but planning to do a really long one for next, had a relaxing week after exams, now im going to try and write as much as i can.
Thanks to everyone who's reviewed, your support really does help. Hope you enjoy this chapter, but sad to say it isn't one of my best.
Chapter 14:- Backwards or forwards?
Ronnie was sat on her sofa with Danielle's warm body nestled against her stomach, Ronnie's eyes were filled with warmth, attentively hovering over her daughter. Danielle felt no need to move away from her mother, she was there to stay. The street lights had come on outside as it the sky began to darken, it had just passed eight'o'clock, it had been a long day, yet it had gone so quick, it seemed to Ronnie as if she had only spent minutes with her daughter but it had in fact been hours.
Danielle lifted her head slightly off Ronnie's chest, looking up into her mother's eyes she spoke nervously, unsure of a reaction to what she was about to say"did you ever think about me?", Ronnie looked down straight into her daughters eyes, she didn't need long to reply to this question, she had rehearsed it over and over in her head for years. If her daughter ever came looking for her, at one point she had all the answers mapped out in her head, but since her father had told her of her daughters "death", she felt no need to build up speeches in her mind as she'd have no one to share them with, not that she needed to rehearse what she wanted to say, everything she could say had to come from the heart. But now her daughter was here, anything Danielle wanted to know she was sure she had the answers for, and if she didn't Ronnie just had to find the right words to answer truthfully from the heart.
"I don't think there has been a day go by in the last nineteen years where I haven't thought about you, I always used to think about what you might be doing at that moment, or whether your adoptive parents really loved you and gave you everything you deserved, and if you were happy, or whether you were ever lonely" Ronnie answered clutching her locket with her free hand. "Did you ever think about me?" Ronnie asked patiently waiting for an answer, she wasn't sure when Danielle had been told of her adoption, or whether Danielle ever wondered about her birth mother.
Danielle breathed deeply searching for the right words in her head to explain what it had been like for her, "I was told when I was five that I was adopted, so I knew from pretty early on, but for as long as I can remember I always knew I was different, from the rest of my family, there were only small things but they were always there, we had different looks, different tastes, different likes and dislikes. On my eighth birthday I was given my locket" Danielle began to answer Ronnie, placing her hand around her neck to hold her locket as she mentioned it, only to realise that it was no longer there.
Danielle shot up off the sofa quickly, ripping herself away from Ronnie with a horrified look on her face, she felt around her neck over and over searching her pockets with her other spare hand, as Ronnie looked on confused. Danielle stopped, she stood up straight with her right hand still placed around her neck as if holding her locket, even though it was no longer there, her left hand hung loosely by her side. Danielle looked up at Ronnie, Ronnie looked upset, but she had a certain sparkle to eye, one that Danielle had never seen before, a happy shine in her eye, her lips turned up at each end, forming a small smile which faded suddenly as Danielle leapt out of her arms. It was as if she was ready, waiting to pull her shutters up again bringing up her shield at the first sign of rejection, she was sat in what looked like an uncomfortable position, after being separated from her daughter once again.
"Do you have my locket?, can I have my locket?, Ronnie...please...I need my locket" Danielle asked, it was less of a question more of a demand, her eyes were watering and her face had turned red. Danielle didn't understand how she was so willingly just going to leave her locket with Ronnie and walk away earlier and now she couldn't be without it. "Hey, hey dan, calm down I've got it baby, it's here" Ronnie spoke calmly, almost a whisper but loud enough for Danielle to hear, she put her hand in her trouser pocket and pulled out Danielle's silver locket. Danielle let out a sigh of relief, she removed it gently from Ronnie's hand, undoing the clasp and fastening it round her neck. She looked down at it and smiled, it lay against her chest, close to her heart, where it had always been, and where it always will be.
Danielle sat back down at the other end of the sofa, further away from Ronnie, she looked down at her hands and spoke gently "I don't always wear it, but I'm never without it". Ronnie smiled at this, she herself had always been attached to her own locket wherever she went, it went or rather Amy went, but she couldn't help feel sadness that was all Danielle ever had to remind her of her mother, did Danielle hate her for not being there during her childhood, sure enough Ronnie hated herself for not being there, but she couldn't change the past, she could only look to the future, to their future, this was a happy thought but sadness still lingered, Danielle had now moved further away from her, where they moving backwards or forwards? Neither knew.
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