And so it Begins

Location-Forks, WA (Hope)

Disclaimer: S. Myer owns all, but what I wouldn't give for a Jasper of my very own-sigh.

A/N- I feel I must explain something-these first few chapters were previously one very long (over 21k) chapter, however not wanting to overwhelm anyone, I divided it into smaller chapters. So, bear with me while we get through the backstory, I just feel it is important to establish it and well...honestly, Jasper wouldn't shut the fuck up. Blame him.

My world is a brighter place because of C Me Smile- thank you, for everything-you truly are my muse, full of inspiration, laughter and Jasper love.

Angstgoddess003-this would not be here without you. I know it's not your thing, but this is for you, bb.

"**~~**"

"All you did was get me through, I owe every breathe to you
Heart and soul unparalyzed, all you did was save my life
"- Our Lady Peace

"**~~**"

I don't remember the date. Although, sometimes I feel like I should. Sometimes I feel guilty that I don't remember the exact date of the day my world changed.

Did I know how drastically my world was going to change at the time?

Fuck no.

Nothing could have prepared me for that.

The weather was still warm with humidity thick in the air. School had only started a few days earlier, and I was heading to the cafeteria to meet Edward for lunch. He was coming from biology in the science wing across the quad, so I expected to be there earlier than him. As sophomores, we had the last lunch of the day and the choices offered for our so-called-lunch were minimum at best. I grabbed an apple and water and headed to the same table we had been sitting for the past few days. Yanking out a chair, I sat and dropped my backpack onto the floor next to me. As I waited for Edward to arrive, I pulled out my copy of "Grapes of Wrath" for my American Lit class and began reading that day's assignment. I was hunched over the table, my knee bouncing up and down out of habit, arms curved a bit protectively around the book sitting on the table in front of me, as I buried my face it. Just as Tom Ford was about to return home, I heard it clear across the cafeteria. There was no mistaking the low rumble, from deep within its owner, full of amusement and satisfaction.

Edward's laughter.

I glanced up and spotted Edward immediately. Even if he didn't stand just that much taller than his classmates, or have that off-shade of red hair that was unique only to him, I would have recognized him.

We had been friends, best friends, since I had moved to Forks, Washington from Abilene Texas just under a year ago. I had left the warm sun of Texas for the cool rain of Forks in October of my freshmen year, nervous as fuck about being the new kid in school.

I had never lived anywhere but Dyess Air Force base, until my father was discharged from the Air Force, he received a job offer in Washington. Eager to serve his country, my father had been waiting outside the recruiter's office before they opened on his eighteenth birthday, ready to join the Air Force and follow in his father's footsteps-which he did faithfully until the day he was done. I was born and raised on the base, never knowing another way of life other than the small intimate atmosphere of base life. I attended base schools, played basketball at their community center, and rode my bike down the wide roads before the rows of identical single level houses. It was a happy life, a safe and comfortable life.

Until my parents informed me we were moving to Forks, Washington.

We packed up and left my childhood home, my memories and my best friend Peter. All were left behind. I remember looking out the back window as our car pulled away, the U-haul truck in front of us, waving to Peter as he sat on his bike in front of my now-empty house. There was Peter-one hand waving while the other reached up and swept his blond hair off his face to disguise the tears he was wiping away. I was fourteen; I was too fucking old to cry, but as Peter got smaller and smaller, I realized his image began to blur…and it wasn't from the distance between us. I turned around in my seat.

I wiped the tears with the palm of my hand, refusing to let my weakness show.

We drove straight through to Forks, only stopping for food and to sleep every other night in a motel. Our arrival in Forks was uneventful; we pulled up in front of the two-story white house and my mother turned in her seat, cheerfully announcing to me that we had 'arrived'.

I was not excited.

Opening the door, I got out and stretched, shivering. It was fucking cold…and damp. Sighing, I followed my mother as she and my father walked toward the porch.

"Hurry up, Jasper, come see the new house. It's going to be great," my mother called to me over her shoulder.

I doubted her prediction.

"**~~**"

I missed Peter desperately and began a war of resentment against my parents for forcing me to move to this Hellhole, where rain and clouds had replaced fire and brimstone. I moped around the new house for a week before starting school, spending all my time my room playing my guitar and sleeping. The new house wasn't altogether bad but it was not altogether good either. It was larger than my base home; my new bedroom was almost twice as big as my old one. All I could think about was how much fun Peter and I could have in it, wrestling, playing our guitars, and video games.

As I lay on my bed, dreading my first day of school the next day, I missed Peter even more. I had spoken to him on the phone daily since we left, but then my mother decided to limit me to only one call a week. She said I needed to start breaking away and was going to have to make new friends.

Fuck new friends. I wanted my old friend. My only friend.

The next day, I woke early, showered and gathered the school supplies my mother had bought for me in Texas. I glanced at the little pewter Lone Star keychain on my backpack, fingering the smooth edges of the silver surface; missing Peter just that much more.

"Wish me luck, Petey," I said out loud as I swung the backpack over my shoulder and left the bedroom.

I had been giving my parents the cold shoulder routine for the entire week, only talking when spoken to, refusing to engage them in any voluntary conversations. I didn't even say good-bye to my mother as I walked out of the house, slamming the door with force behind me.

Forks High School was small, and I quickly learned my way around. I arrived in geometry class, before most of the other students and found a desk near the back. My day had been filled with introductions from the teachers, followed by a round of 'hellos' from the class. I could feel the heat flush to my cheeks every time it was repeated.

It was like washing your hair. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. Introduction. Hellos. Blush.

As I hung my head, allowing my blonde waves to cover my eyes, I waited for the embarrassment to happen once again. The chair next to me slid out, and a tall lanky body slid onto it. Looking up through my hair, I could make out the oddest shade of brownish-red-copper hair I had ever seen on anyone. The teacher broke my concentration and as I expected, introduced me.

"Class, we have a new student, Jasper Whitlock. Mr. Whitlock, will you please stand and say a few words about yourself,"

I looked up in fear. He motioned for me to stand. I slid my chair out, my legs already trembling as I stood slowly.

"I…I…I'm Jasper Whitlock and I'm from Abilene, Texas. Pleased to met y'all." I drawled. I heard the immediate giggles from the girls, and the snickers from the boys.

All except one.

"Thank you, Mr. Whitlock. Your project partner for the year will be Mr. Cullen. Mr. Cullen, please show Jasper where we are in this project."

I scanned the room for Mr. Cullen, wondering which one of these snickering assholes was now going to be my fucking project partner. A paper was slid across my desk to me by a pale hand.

"We are on lab number one, part three," the bronze-haired boy said as he pointed to the questions on the sheet. "Do you want to write while I do the measurements?" I nodded. "I'm Edward," he introduced himself quickly as he stood to retrieve the project materials. We continued to work throughout the class. Edward was quiet, only speaking to provide me with the information I needed to write down on the lab. There was a calm demeanor about him. I found myself staring at him as he scrunched his face up in concentration measuring the angles of the objects assigned. Every now and then, he would reach up and run a hand through that messy odd-colored hair, making it stand up on end.

After class, a few of the snickering assholes decided to taunt me on the way to lunch, walking behind me, mimicking my accent.

"So y'all met Jasper here. Jasper is from Texas."

"You know, I thought everything's bigger in Texas."

"Yee haw."

"What kind of name is Jasper anyway? Sounds gay."

As I continued to walk, my head down, eyes locked on the tiled floor, I felt them get closer and closer. I waited for that first physical contact, when I would get pushed, tripped, or worse.

It happened.

Only not to me.

I heard the distinct noise of a body being slammed into a locker.

"Shut the fuck up, Newton." I spun around to see that Edward had pushed the Newton kid against the lockers, both hands tightly fisting the neckline of Newton's tee-shirt. Edward's face was red, his eyes squinting and a few veins on his forehead bulged out. I watched in shock as he practically spat his words at Newton. "You leave him the fuck alone. Got me?"

Newton nodded, and Edward released him, stepping back. They eyed each other, both expecting the other to make a move. When it was clear the confrontation was over, Edward picked up his backpack, and walked up to me nodding toward the cafeteria before setting off in the direction of it. I stood, shocked for a minute, before deciding to follow him, but once I entered the busy cafeteria I lost track of him.

I sat at a table, alone, writing random words and music lyrics in a notebook. A book slammed down on the table, and I jumped.

"What the hel-"

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare ya." Edward stood before me, smiling and completely relaxed again, just like in science class. He clearly had issues, like Jekyll and Hyde, bi-polar or some shit. He pulled out a chair and slouched into it, leaning back while shuffling through his backpack. After pulling out a paper bag, he reached in and grabbed something. He held out half a sandwich to me, nodding in encouragement. I took it, taking a small bite.

I smiled in thanks.

"So... tell me about Texas, Jasper," Edward mumbled around his sandwich.

And with that, I began to tell him all about Texas and Petey.

Maybe Forks wouldn't be so bad after all.

Edward and I had been inseparable since that day eleven months earlier. It seems corny to say it now, but I feel like, in a way, Edward saved my life that day. He gave me something of himself-physically putting himself on the line for me. That was something that no one had ever done before for me. I am sure Petey would have if he had needed to do so, but Edward stood up for someone he barely knew.

We never talked about that day after that and Newton never bothered me again.

One day, I knew I would get to repay the favor to Edward. Perhaps not by threatening to beat the shit out of someone, but I knew something would happen someday and I would be able to show Edward the generosity he showed me that first day.

I owed him.

My parents were thrilled with my friendship with Edward, as he gradually returned their son to them. I still called Peter weekly, but our conversations were now focused on happier news.

Edward's parents were equally as thrilled with me as my parents with him. It seemed Edward had always been very much of loner, and had never had a close friend. Weekends were spent at each others' houses and nightly dinners always included one extra person. By the end of November, Mrs. C knew how to cook my favorite meals as well as my own mother did. Dr. Cullen, Doc as I called him, was tall and thin with bright blond hair; not sun-kissed like mine. His eyes were the most intense blue I had ever seen. Edward definitely got his unique green eye color from his mom, who had long brown hair and was almost as tall as Dr Cullen. Their house was about twice the size of mine, and while my parents were not hurting for money, we didn't live nearly as comfortable as the Cullens. Edward had the finest of everything; he would barely mention a need for something and it would appear on his bed the next day while he was at school. Edward never took advantage of his parent's generosity though, he simply gratefully accepted what he was given and provided what he could in return: respect, excellent grades and atypically pleasant teenage behavior.

Even Alice, his younger sister, seemed to enjoy my friendship with Edward. Only thirteen months younger than him, she was much shorter, her short spiky hair jet black versus his awkward red, and her green eyes were duplicates of Edward's green ones. The smile she seemed to wear constantly was infectious and hard to resist when she was near. People gravitated toward her, feeding off her energy and impossibly happy mood. She drew them in without even realizing it. I was not immune to her charms either. I enjoyed the attention she gave me: the shy smiles, the quick glances across the dinner table, the blush when I would say something directly to her; they were all welcome. Even if I didn't quite know how to handle the affections, I reveled in them.

Truthfully though, girls were not something I felt entirely comfortable around.

Entirely fucking awkward was more like it.

But the more exposure I had to Alice, the more comfortable I felt around other girls. Alice taught me how to flirt, use my southern charm and even coaxed the occasional 'darlin' out of me. She taught me to enjoy the attention my looks garnered me. Perhaps this would be the year I would get a girlfriend.

"**~~**"

So there I sat, in the cafeteria my freshman year listening to Edward's laughter as he walked toward me.

He was not alone. She was with him.

Her hair was your average brown, long and a bit wavy. Her eyes were your average brown, though wide and pure. Her body was that of an average girl, developing curves in all the right places. Her face was your average face, freckles scattered across her tanned nose and cheeks.

She was anything but average, however.

My heart skipped a beat as she approached my table with Edward close at her side, his laughter bathing her in velvet rumbles.

"Jasper, this is Bella, Chief Swan's daughter. She just moved up from Phoenix," he quickly blurted out to me. As if he would forget it or something.

"Hi, Jasper, nice to meet you." Placing her books on the table, she sat down across from me.

In Edward's seat.

I glanced up at him, expecting him to ask her to move. He didn't. Instead, he just sat his ass down next to her, grinning at me the entire time. Shaking my head in disbelief, I looked across at Bella.

"Hi, Bella. Welcome to Forks," I kept my voice even and bland, trying to conceal my drawl and the heart that raced in my chest.

"Thanks," she answered. "Everyone has been really friendly so far." She glanced around the cafeteria then, smiling at a few faces.

"Really? That's a surprise," I whispered softly. Brown eyes stared at me, trying to decipher the meaning behind my words.

"You're not from around here, Jasper. Your accent is adorable," she chirped as she leaned across the table toward me. I reflexively sat back away from her.

I guess I hadn't hid my accent after all.

"Texas…Abilene." I offered nothing more.

"Really?" her voice rose three pitches. "This is quite the change of scenery for you then," she surmised.

"I invited Bella to go with us to the meadow this weekend," Edward announced, his glance traveling from Bella to me. I shrugged with a fake indifference.

I didn't want or need another friend.

I had Edward. I didn't need Bella.

I had no idea how wrong I was.

She was just what I needed.

"**~~**"

The school year continued and the three of us had become inseparable. Bella had two classes with Edward, one class with me, and we all shared the same lunch. In various combinations, there were at least two of us together constantly. While Edward and I had made room in our lives for Bella, the Cullens and the Whitlocks had made room in their houses for Bella. The resentment I had for her that first day faded away with every smile she graced me. There was something in her eyes that made my heart ache for her. It was a look I recognized and had seen in my own reflection for those few first months after moving to Forks. That longing for a life past, for something that has slipped from your physical grasp while you desperately cling to the memories. While the sadness in her eyes faded more each day she was with us, it never faded completely. Her deep brown always held a hint of discontentment that I never asked about. We didn't know much about her past, and we didn't pry. She would tell us in time on her own terms.

Edward's entire family was comfortable with showing physical affection, something my family never did. My parents were wonderful, but my father was a military man through and though and you never showed your weakness. You never showed emotion, period.

It was not unusual for there to be physical contact between Edward, Bella and I. Edward was big on hugs, and handed them out to Bella and me in celebration of good test grades, comfort from a nightmare, or consoling over missing the warm sun of your childhood home. Course, he saved the hand-shake-chest-bump-man-hugs for me.

Bella never hesitated to run her hands through my hair; she was constantly pushing my curls off my face and tucking them behind my ears, saying some shit about wanting to see my 'pretty' eyes. I would always push her hand away right before the heat raced to my cheeks. She would often sit between us on the couch, sometimes laying her head in my lap, while her feet were on Edward's. There was nothing sexual about it; it was just three friends fulfilling a desire for a connection.

We weren't your typical uncontrollable horny teenagers. Yet.

We were just Bella, Edward and Jasper.

The unique bond between the three of us did not go unnoticed by our parents, especially Edward's. This unique bond led to one of the most embarrassing days of my entire life. Edward and I had returned to Edward's from the movies only to find that Dr. C had arrived home early from work. As soon as we were in the house, he called for us from his office, his gentle voice unusually demanding. Glancing at each other quickly, Edward and I walked down the hall and into the office.

Dr. C sat behind his desk, hands clasped in front of him. His look was stern, something we rarely saw on the Doc.

"Boys, have a seat, please." He motioned to the dual leather chairs in front of his desk. Edward and I sat down. Immediately, my knee began bouncing nervously. I had a bad feeling about this. I peeked at Edward, who was relaxing back in his seat, his legs stretched out in front of him.

Biting my lip, I looked back at Dr. C and…that is when I saw them.

The magazines that had been hidden under Edward's bed were now sitting on the Doc's desk.

Shit.

I nervously glanced over at Edward, who just sat there fucking smirking. Then it began, a discussion where we got instructions on what touching was and was not appropriate, the sensationalism of women in pornography, the natural need to masturbate, or as Dr. C called it, 'rubbing one out', menstruation-which personally made me sick to my stomach- and finally, the act of intercourse itself. He talked about the birds, the bees and Bella. He spoke of how happy he was we were so close, but voiced his concern over that very same closeness.

Well, make up your fucking mind, Dr. Cullen.

"Keep your hands off Bella's part….I mean her… body parts."

Oh.

I had kept my head down the entire time, finding the threads on the hem of my tee shirt highly interesting. My knee never stopped moving, my fingers twisted around the loose thread, winding, unwinding, and winding again. Edward never once moved from his casual, laid-back position. How he always managed to stay so cool, under even the most embarrassing situations was just one more thing I admired about him.

Once Dr. C said we were free to go, my legs couldn't get me out of that room quick enough. Edward and I walked down the hall to his room and when we were a safe distance from the office, I leaned and whispered to Edward with great concern.

"He's got all our porn."

Edward turned to me and winked.

"Mom may have cleaned under my bed, but I guarantee she didn't clean under my dresser."

Huh.

Edward was resourceful. My admiration for Edward increased ten times that day.

We didn't stop looking at the magazines, we just hid them better. We would open them up on Edward's bed, the door locked, the centerfold spread before us; our mutual admiration for the model's assets obvious in our mutual hard-ons. I admit, I felt a little guilty about looking at these women after the Doc's talk about the 'objectification of women'.

I may have felt guiltier about it. But I sure as fuck didn't stop doing it.

"**~~**"

Before we knew it, the winter rain gave way to spring rain and the school year began to wind down. We made plans for the summer, trips to the meadow, a day in Seattle with the Doc and Mrs. C, and a weekend of camping with my parents.

My father loved camping and we roughed it a few times each summer. Tents and sleeping bags were the only conveniences he allowed us-he even required us to start our own fires for cooking. I was looking forward to including Bella on this year's trip; she missed the sun of Phoenix as much as I missed the dry heat of Texas. This was something Bella and I shared and understood about each other, having both moved from our sun-drenched childhood homes. There was always a small part of you missing that no one around you could replace. I couldn't replace that missing piece for Bella, but I sensed when her piece had increased in size and would give her an extra long hug on those days, running my hands up and down her back, my chin resting on her head. I would hold her and tell her it would be okay as she sniffled into my shirt, her small hands grasping at my clothing. She would eventually pull away, wiping her nose with the back of her hand, and looking up at me through wet lashes, whispering 'thank you' to me. Edward knew I could provide her with an understanding at these times that he could not, but I never felt any resentment from him. In fact, he would often just smile his gratitude for my providing Bella with the comfort she desired.

The three of us celebrated the end of sophomore year by hiking up the meadow and skinny dipping in the small waterfall and pond there. While I pretended to think nothing of seeing Bella naked, my heart raced at the thought of her completely exposed; her small bud-sized breasts with small nipples, her paled skin, curved ass and barely-there curls. Seeing a naked girl for the first time was still enough to drive excitement through my fifteen-year-old body, straight to my cock. I remember hiding behind a boulder while Bella tried to coax me out.

Edward just laughed, the bastard.

As I stood, naked and cupping myself on the edge of the water, I stared at Bella. Her long hair slicked back, her eyelashes sparkling with droplets of water, her wet shoulders shining in the sun, her breasts hovering just below the surface of the crystal clear water as she floated a few feet from Edward. Once again, his cool manner impressed me as he sprayed Bella with water, laughed; then swam quickly away. They frolicked for a few minutes before Bella stopped, standing a bit and holding out her hand toward me.

"Come on in, Hale," she encouraged, grinning wildly. I couldn't help but smile at her use of the nickname she had given me. We had been filling out emergency contact cards for the school and Bella grabbed mine from me before I was done, giggling over my full name, Jasper Hale Whitlock. Since then, she called me Hale whenever she was trying to get under my skin-which seemed pretty damn often.

I made my way slowly into the cold water, letting go of myself and diving under the water, swimming over to where I belonged, with Bella and Edward.

"**~~**"

That summer, Edward, Bella and I spent almost every waking moment together. I had noticed Alice hanging around us a bit more that summer, which was nice for Bella. It gave her the female companionship that neither Edward nor I could provide. They could talk about…well, girl stuff like bras, periods and shit like that. We even included Alice on some of our outings. She went to our meadow a few times, although Edward would not allow skinny dipping when Alice was present. It didn't escape my attention that she always ended up next to me wherever we went. I didn't mind too much, in fact, I kind of liked the attention, but she was still Edward's little sister.

Even the Chief of a small town put in a lot of hours, and Charlie was not home much for Bella. Dr and Mrs. C, and my parents insisted that Bella join us for everything from nightly dinners and shopping trips, to week-long vacations. Bella began to feel comfortable enough in the Cullen's kitchen that Mrs. C would ask Bella to cook dinner for us occasionally.

She would work for hours, her little hips swaying to the music playing throughout the kitchen while she cut, chopped and burned. Edward and I would sit at the island, watching her. Sometimes, she would get completely lost in her thoughts, forgetting Edward and I were there, singing the lyrics to some girl power shit. I would look over at Edward, rolling my eyes at the song, only be reminded of actual girl power when the smack would hit my shoulder. Rubbing the bruise, I would scowl at Bella and look at Edward for brotherly support, but I got nothing but a one-shouldered shrug.

We would help her serve dinner, carrying plates and platters to the small dining table. Their table, which previously had four permanent chairs, now had six, as Bella and I were almost constant dinner companions to the Cullens.

There was no place Bella or I would rather be.

Their nightly dinner routine had become ours- discussing our days, our up and downs, and laughing at the exaggerated stories with witch Alice always entertained us. Her over- dramatic gestures never failed to have Bella and I holding our aching sides. Edward would simply shake his head at his little sister's antics. I didn't miss the concern that flashed across his face when Alice's attention would suddenly focus on me, and her excited demeanor would calm as she held my gaze. It was always me that looked away first, usually with a slight heat on my face. I felt bad enjoying her attention as much as I did.

I also felt guilty as hell, but I had no idea why.

"**~**"

Thank you for reading…