Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Outsiders.
(Language, intense kissing, talk of rape and alcohol for warning)
Keep Moving
Family Beans With a Side of Tongue
(Lucy POV)
When I woke up the sun was high in the sky, shinning down on my face. Dally's jacket was draped over my small body. My head has against his thigh, my laced converse against the car door. Surprisingly, I didn't feel sick to my stomach, but my head was throbbing slightly. For once my throat called for the need of water. There was a half drunken bottle on the floor. I reached for it and picked it up. Sitting up slightly I took a small swing and capped it before throwing it back on the floor. When I laid back down, my head landed on Dally's lap. He shot his head down at me, with his small Dally smile. His right hand left the steering wheel as he looked back at the road. Dallas's hand brushed the hair from my forehead. Rubbing the top of my head with his thumb as he did so.
"Your sweating." he told me. I hadn't even notice, and didn't really care. Dally rubbed this hand over my forehead and then wiped it on his pants. It made me inwardly chuckle, that was sweet of him. Disgusting, but sweet. He continued to gingerly and gently caress my face and forehead. I closed my eyes at the nice feeling of his rough hands. Eventually, I grabbed the hand and held it in mine on my shoulder. Then I passed out, AGAIN! My body needed that sleep. When I woke up again, I felt a lot better. The throbbing in my head had disappeared but I felt weak still. It wore on my mood a little, but what didn't make a huge dent in my mood now a days.
We just stopped off the road at a gas station/restaurant thingy. We had a little bit of a late lunch. Dallas had a heaping plate of ribs, that he ate all gone. I was amazed, and jealous. I had a few French-fries that he made me order. He also ate his own fries along with a strawberry shake. I had a sip of it, the best fucking sip of strawberry shake I've ever had. But of course, all of that didn't last. Because I was close to throwing it all up right before we left. We sat on the curb before I felt good enough to get back in the car. Dally was really gentle with me, I noticed. He must understand how fragile I've become, it makes me sick.
We were in Missouri when we stopped there, now we are exiting Missouri. As we did, I fell asleep again. Dallas and I hardly talked during the times I was awake. He asked me a few more times to tell him about my five months away from him, but I didn't say much. I told him it was too soon. That I wasn't in the right mind set to say anything. Then I fell asleep again. When I would wake up I would apologize for leaving him to drive by himself in silence. He told me he didn't mind because I was with him non the less. Then he said that was cheesy, making me smirk at him. He would smirk back.
So now I'm waking up, with a weak body again. I turned my head over an looked up at Dally. It was one of the only times I can remember that I admitted that I felt weak. This wasn't just a tired body, but a tired mind. Also being so frail makes my body ache painfully. Dally looked down at me with not much expression, except curiosity maybe. I moaned out to him. He put his hand on my forehead again. "Dal, I feel so heavy." he nodded looking up.
"Dal." he looked back down to me. "I hurt." I groaned.
"Where?" I shivered slightly.
"All over." all of a sudden I felt dizzy again. Reaching out slightly, I almost begged. "Water."
Dal handed me the bottle from his lap, unscrewing the cap before he handed it over. Sitting up slightly, I took a sip. Then another, until I felt the dizziness subside. I handed the bottle back to him, he took a small gulp before placing it back between his legs. Turning on my side, I groaned again.
"I'm sorry I'm so whiny." I muttered quietly.
"I'd rather have you whine then not tell me what's wrong when it's wrong." he mumbled to the road. I nodded to his leg before dozing off a little.
"Go back to sleep, I'll wake you up when we get there. We're almost there." He said rubbing my shoulder. "And don't you worry about that Peter lady, Darry worked everything out."
I smiled inwardly as I drifted off again. That's my Dar Bear, always fixing everything. He's so perfect sometimes! Well, I just wonder what he's done though. What if I have to leave still, if that's the case…I have no idea how I would react. Maybe I would die from the stress alone. I don't even care, I'm just happy to be going home. Happy to see Darry and Ponyboy; but most of all, Sodapop. God, I wonder how I will react. How they will react? I'm so, dead looking. When I saw myself in the mirror at the gas station, I looked better than before but not by much. I was still gray with bags on my bags under my eyes. It might not of been possible but I think I lost more weight, which doesn't help me any.
I had a dream while I was asleep. My parents were staring at me at the dining room table as I ate chocolate cake. Stuffing my face as fast as I could while they watched me. The cake just seemed to be getting bigger and bigger. No matter how many heaping mouthfuls I would chew, I couldn't finish it. I looked at my parents, as they looked at me disappointingly. My voice whined to them, 'I can't finish, I'm sorry.'
'Your just giving up, just like that?' Mother said looking at Dad. Then, I turned to the side and threw up the cake in a giant chunk. When I came back up from the side of the table, my parents looked deadly and sickly. 'Leave.' Dad said, blood exited his mouth as he did so.
Then I got up and left the house crying my eyes out. In the middle of the road, in front of the house I stood. Crying on my knees, yelling for my brothers. When I looked up, a bus was parked with the engine on. Smoothie and Joan were standing in the front window, Chris as the driver. He honked at me with an evil expression. I screamed at them. 'I dare you!'
He revved up the engine. 'Do me in!' The three looked at one another. 'DO IT!' The bus came charging toward my small body in the street. Just as it was inches from my body, I woke up. My hand was clenched to the hem of Dally's shirt. He was leaning over me, cradling my head in his lap. His eyes were gentle and worried. I was in a puddle of sweat and shaking slightly.
"You okay?" he asked with the face that said, 'Don't lie!'. So I didn't.
"I don't think so." I groaned letting go of his shirt.
"You didn't look so hot, so I thought I would wake you up. Besides we are just down the street." he told me looking back at the road, starting to drive again.
"Okay, sorry."
"Ya want to talk about it?" he asked.
"Not really, it was just another bad dream." I said turning on my back. My body still ached, but my head was buzzing with the excitement to see my brothers. Dally went quite, and for once I spoke up.
"Dal, thank you for putting up with me the last few days. I'm sure I haven't been the best company. I just…thank you so much for bringing me home."
"Lucy, life wasn't much without you. Just ask the gang, everyone was down the entire time. I could barely go in your house without wanting to pound someone in. So Two-bit and I would go drink, then get in a fight. The two of us made a pretty good pair when it came to getting our minds off you. That's what we would do if either of us would be down about you, we would get in fights and drink." he told me smirking slightly.
"Sounds like a typical Saturday night to me." he chucked lightly.
"Just think to the extreme." I felt my eyes starting to throb, another headache coming on. Closing my lids, I rested my body. Dally was quiet again, thinking to himself as I thought to myself. Nothing really special popped in there, nothing worth repeating anyway. Suddenly I felt the car stop.
Looking up at Dal, he smile at me. "We are here."
"How ya feeling?" he asked as I tried to get up.
"Truthfully?" he nodded rolling his eyes. "Scared. Excited. Shitty. In pain. But most of all scared."
He didn't really have words to say what he was thinking, his face said it all. "You ready?"
"No." I frowned as he helped me to sit up. "And yes."
"Well, they are standing at the door." he pointed. I turned my head slowly towards the house. Soda was standing in front of Pony and Darry. His face was relieved and worried. Ponyboy looked like he was overjoyed, but I'm sure that will change as soon as he sees me up close. Darry looked plain concerned, but happy with a small smile. All of a sudden, Dally was opening the door so I could get out. He grabbed my hand firmly, pulling me out of the car. I breathed in as their faces dropped a little at the sight of me. Leaning on Dally, I felt a tear fall down my cheek.
Sodapop started to walk towards me, my other brothers right behind him. I walked through the fence, forgetting how weak I was as I stumbled. Finally I jogged clumsily over to him. Jumping into him when I reached him. My legs wrapped around his middle as he held me up easily. Both my arms clung around his neck as I chocked out loudly into his shoulder. My head leaned into his, I kissed him on the cheek. He was crying too, but not sobbing like I was. Both my hands clenched onto his shirt around his back. Soon I felt two other pairs of strong arms wrap around me. I leaned into who's ever head was to my left.
"Lucy girl." Soda chocked out. It made my heart leap to hear his voice. Made me feel weaker then ever, knowing I was away from him for so long. TOO long. I felt my exhaustion and dehydration ach on my body. But I didn't care at the moment, until I that ach become stronger in my body. It tore me and I chocked out the pain in my sobs of relief and sadness.
"Oh God!" I muttered in my tears. Then four arms left from around Soda and I. It made me fell naked almost, but felt better as Soda carried me inside.
"Jeez Luc, your so warm and your shaking." he said more to himself then to me. Soda sat down on the couch with me on his lap. I turned and laid across his lap. My head resting against his arm and chest. Pony and Darry walked through the door after a few minutes. By then I was breathing heavily, but not crying anymore. Puckering up my lips slightly, I breathed out a heavy stressful sigh. Closing my eyes as I did so. I slid off of Soda's lap and leaned on my knees with my feet planted on the floor. My hands wrapped around my stomach as I tried to make myself smaller. Soda put his hand on my back, rubbing it in circles.
"I'm sorry." I muttered shakily. "I love you! I love my boys!"
"We love our Lucy girl." Ponyboy said with his new man voice. I couldn't help but chuckle slightly. With great effort, I stood up with the help of Sodapop. Running into the coffee table, I walked over to Pony. Putting my hands on his shoulders I looked at his face.
"My baby brother is not a baby anymore." I said to him with a weak voice. Soda was right about my shaking, I could feel it now.
"Luc." Pony said looking slightly perplexed with sadness. I couldn't look at his eyes anymore, they made me weaker just as Soda's voice does. I hugged my baby brother. "Missed ya Luc."
Ponyboy was crying now. "It wasn't the same without you." I nodded back the tears forming in my eyes.
Then I chuckled a little bitterly, nothing was the same without them. Look what five months away from them did to me. "Pony, I love you."
"I love you too." he cried into my shoulder. I held him tighter, ignoring my weak stance. Pony was my little brother no matter how frail I am. If he is crying, that's my first concern right now. He needs me now that I'm back, I don't plan on leaving again.
We hugged for a good five minutes before we pulled apart. He wiped off his watery eyes, like a guy would. I patted him on the shoulder before stumbling over to Brother. He wrapped me in his arms tightly. His warmth that he inherited from Dad took me over. Again I was a blubbering mess into his chest. I looked up at him.
"Brother." he nodded with tears in his eyes."Don't you ever do that to me again, you hear?" I nodded wiping some of his tears away.
"Don't worry about Mrs. Peter either, I've talked to the judge about everything. I showed him your notebooks, then explained everything. He agreed to let me be your guardian if he meets with you in person. Then within months he will monitor ours and yours progress. Mrs. Peter isn't our social worker anymore, his assistant is." I nodded uncertainly. I'm not to happy about him showing the judge my notebooks but oh well.
"He wants to see you as soon as you've rested up a little bit. I'll take you there tomorrow."
"Okay, as long as I'm with you guys." my eyes drooped down to my shoes. Still shaking slightly.
"Why tomorrow? Why can't we wait until I'm not looking like shit?"
"He said he wants to see how different you've become without my guardianship. Beside it will give him a better view of you when you do improve." Darry told me with a lot more composure in his voice. I nodded starting to walk into the kitchen for a glass of what. On my way I stumbled into the table, leaning on it. Darry came over to my side.
"You should go to bed, you look…tired."
"I am, but I don't want to." I slept most of the car ride, and I just got here. My hand leaned on Darry for support.
"Luc, you can barely stand. Go to bed." Dar told me gently but firmly.
"Okay, but wake me up if you need me." why the hell did I just say that? They wouldn't dare wake me up, they wouldn't forgive themselves.
"Sleep good." I smiled at Darry and Pony while Soda ushered me to my room. In my room it looked the same, minus any furniture besides the bed. Sodapop took care of me. He was helping me into bed and taking my shoes off like an older brother would. Kissing me of the forehead before leaving.
"I love you, Luc. SO happy your home." I uttered a 'Love you.' waiting for sleep to over come me, which it didn't.
(Dally POV)
I told Darry I would be back to talk to them about some stuff after I returned Buck's car. So here I am, walking through their front door. As I shut it behind me, I looked around the room. It felt a lot lighter since the last time I was here. Except for the nervous feeling that lingered in the room. Darry was pacing slightly, his hands on his head. Pony was staring off sitting in the arm chair. Sodapop was exiting Lucy's room with a sad face. Dar noticed me and walked over with a hushed but almost panicked voice. His hand grabbed the arms of my leather jacket.
"Dallas. What the hell happened to my baby sister?" I shrugged him off and ushered them to sit. Soda sat on the arm of the armchair next to Pony while Darry and I took the couch.
"I wish I could tell you, but I didn't get much out of her." we went quiet for a moment, I was waiting for some questions.
"Dal, I can see what you meant about her being emotional." Dar said.
"Yeah, she had a tantrum the other night. Screaming at me about nothing, but it felt like she was more yelling at herself." they nodded.
"So where did you find her?" Soda spoke up.
"Brooklyn." I told them the whole story about meeting her roommate and my entire journey. Even told them about that one chick that we met at the pit stop. I explained why her hands were all fucked up. And how she slept most of the time.
"Glory." Pony said shaking his head. "So other than that you don't know anything?"
"Not really, but I think it was bad. I mean that Chris guy said she was almost raped. And a guy she knew killed the guy who tried to rape her. Then that guy killed himself."
"I imagined she felt really guilty for that." Soda nodded.
"Anything else?" Dar asked.
"Try not to feed her too much, she throws it up if it's to much. I think her body is just so malnourished that it rejects all she puts in. Watch out for the emotional thing too, she really is unstable. Oh and she has nightmares, I've noticed."
"Has she talked to you about them at all?" Pony asked. That kid never talks, he must be really concerned.
"No, but the seemed to be about you guys and your parents."
"Thanks for everything Dal."
"She's my best friend, what can I say." I told them.
"So are you two….an item?" Soda said uneasily.
"I don't know, I might back off for a while until she's figured her shit out. I'll have to talk to her about it."
"Good choice." Darry said strangely. "She doesn't need distractions, she needs to get better. It wouldn't be the best time for you two to become serious."
"So you're okay with it?" I asked.
"Not really, but she's my sister. You're my friend and I have to accepted your feelings for each other sooner or later." Darry said with a sour face. I looked over at the kids who nodded agreeing with Dar.
"Alright then." I smirked standing up. "I'm gonna go say night to the girl, I wont be back for a few days."
"Make I quick." Dar told me. I walked to the back of the house to my girl's room. She was visibly shaking still. Laying on her back in an unkempt way. Her eyes were fluttering open and closed. When she heard me enter, she smiled looking at me.
"Hey babe." I told her closing the door behind myself.
"Lay with me." She told me, so I did. We looked into each other's eyes, until she crashed her lips into mine. She sucked onto my bottom lip violently at first, but then calmed down remembering she was so tired. I smirked into the kiss, pressing my left hand onto her side. My thumb rubbed up and down on her skin under she shirt, not to far up though. In her hair my right hand explored. Then she entered my mouth with her tongue. We fought for dominance at first but she let me have it after a moment. Her small hands were on my chest, gripping my shirt pulling me closer to her. Lucy's little feet were searching for mine, and found my boots. I kept my intentions and mind to myself. Never trying to move forward into something deeper. Even though I was throbbing with temptation, I kept my cool. And believe me when I say it was really tough to keep that cool right now. My girl was making me hotter in between my legs, but I didn't dare move to the next step. We kissed as I tried to ignore my manly hormones.
It was an amazing kiss, one of the best I've had in a while. Not to mention it was the first kiss she had giving me that she used her tongue. It made me think of what she had going on in her mind. She was still shaking, and I felt that need to stop so she wouldn't ware herself out. But I didn't want to stop, is that selfish? Then her body shook against mine and she pulled her face away. Her face looked pained as she groaned out with a shiver. Lucy's had her eyes squeezed shut, still griping my shirt. The two of us were panting heavily. She looked like she was in pain, I looked at her with concern.
"Luc, what's the matter? You okay?" she slowly opened her eyes and took a while to loosen her grip on my shirt.
"Yeah, it just hurts sometimes." I looked down at her hands."Your hands?"
"Well yea but I wasn't talking about that."
"Then what?"
"My body, it's so weak it aches." she told me with a frown.
"I'm sorry I stopped." she frowned deeper.
"It's fine, are you sure your okay?" my girl nodded, grinding her torso up against mine. I hissed at her, she giggled slightly.
"It's not funny." I told her as she giggled once more. It was nice to hear her giggle, it made me feel almost better. But I had to leave because I was really hurting below the belt."I should go." she frowned again.
"When will you come back?"
"When I can, I suppose. I've got to get some things settled the next few days. But if you need me at all, call Buck or tell someone to find me. Don't go out looking for me by yourself, you dig?" she nodded and grabbed the collar of my jacket, pulling me into her face again. Another tender kiss we shared, it didn't help my situation but I kissed back. We pulled apart.
"Get some rest baby." she nodded again. I examined myself, thank god you couldn't notice from the outside that I was truly hating leaving her. Then I left the room with a quick wink to my girl. Passing the Curtis brothers on my way out, I said a quick goodbye. When I got to Buck's, I was completely regretting leaving my girl but it had to be done. My girl is going to get better now, and I can't get in the way.
