Chapter 48 - Mad North by Northwest

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Selina swayed in the lift and closed her eyes. "Faf..."

"What is it?" Bones moved to put an arm around her, but Jim pulled him back.

"You probably don't want to do that."

McCoy looked at the lift's indicator; they had a few decks to go. "Why not?" he asked gruffly.

"Just trust me on this." Jim said. He turned to Selina, and to prevent himself from forgetting not to touch, clasped his hands behind his back like Spock. "Is he alright? What's he saying?"

Selina straightened and took a slow breath. "There was pain and then darkness. He is alive, but I cannot tell him that we are coming." She shook her head and clamped her mouth in a thin line.

Bones pushed past Jim and put an arm around her anyway.

"Bones..."

"You need not be concerned Jim." she said, noting his stance. "I am not a Vulcan. It does not work the same way with me, although I do appreciate the courtesy."

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Maldi slapped him, jogging Sorenson back to awareness. "Did this Grey steal my money?"

Helvítis. If he hadn't been strapped to the bed, he would have banged his head against the wall. When had he mentioned Grey? Everything had gone black for a little while, so the immediate past was almost as fuzzy as the rest of his memory. At least the answer was easy. "No."

There was a long pause as Maldi waited for him to say more. But that had been a completely truthful answer. The drug rewarded capitulation with a feeling of serenity that could easily become addictive. Avoiding that effect had kept him from completely straight answers as much as the pleasure of nettling his tormentor. Now he let himself bask in it and closed his eyes, trying to convey 'nothing to see here, just move along'.

But Maldi wasn't buying it. "Did he help you dispose of the money?"

Relief flooded him. If Maldi was calling Grey a 'he', then he hadn't given up much on her. "No. I don't remember anyone helping me." Ahhh...happy feeling. No, no, can't let yourself have too much of that. He opened his eyes. Why was Maldi smirking?

"Then you did take it." Maldi said.

Sorenson's brow furrowed. He'd slipped up on that last question. Well, circumlocution couldn't save him now. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure I did." There was a sensation like floating. This part of 'stoned' really wasn't half bad. "In fact, I think I remember feeling pretty happy about that."

"What did you do with the money?"

"I just..." He had the distant look of someone trying to remember something that just wouldn't quite come to him. "...don't recall. Weird, huh? It was a lot of money, wasn't it? You'd think I'd remember a thing like that." He attempted to grin and hoped it looked smug.

Maldi glared in disbelief. "How could you possibly have forgotten!?"

Sorenson gritted his teeth. Some unpleasantly honest part of himself seemed to insist on testing 'I couldn't say' as an answer, and right now that was right on the thin line between truth and lie. There had to be a way through. Every command sequence could be broken if you just looked at the right way. But the pressure was becoming overwhelming. No, he was not going to let Maldi know about Grey. He strained against his bonds...

The part of him that was Fafhrd stepped forward and laughed. Surely a kenning should count as truth for a Northern skald? The part that was Allen crossed his arms and stared back. Seriously? And it took you this long to think of that? Somewhere in the background a fiery-bearded Viking laughed and they both glared at him. Shut up! you're not supposed to be part of us anymore.

He shook his head violently. Gah! he was talking to himself - his brain was totally fried. But he had a way forward. He bared his teeth in a wolfish grin. "My seiðkona's distaff is powerful."

"What?" The confusion on Maldi's face was priceless.

"Sorry, can't tell you." he whispered conspiratorially, widening his eyes. "She laid a geis."

"Geis?"

"Taboo, prohibition, spell - mine seems to be pretty strong." He laughed, gazing up at the ceiling with a glassy stare. "My witch beats your witch doctor." If his hands had been free, he would have pumped a fist. "Are you listening out there? I always said you were the best."

The doctor was backing away. Maldi pinned him with a glare.

"A large enough overdose of verasitol has been known to induce not only seizure, but sometimes a sort of psychosis." the doctor explained, very carefully avoiding any hint of I-told-you-so in his voice. "He will still answer truthfully, but only to within his own ability to distinguish truth."

"Inform me when he comes out of it." Maldi snarled. "I have another prisoner to attend to."

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Selina closed her eyes, head tilted slightly. "Maldi has left him to speak to me. We must hurry before he discovers that I have escaped."

"Well, the sickbay should be just down that way." Jim commented. "Hey, listen."

A voice that might have made a pleasant deep baritone, had it not been trying for tenor, was coming from somewhere down the corridor. The tune roughly conformed to 'I am the Very Model of a Modern Major General'.

...And even in Ten-Forward, I can pour you Earth and Rigel beers
though you may not be drinking them if you have got the pointed ears.
You might think Starfleet Admirals should not learn ways of bartender.
But you would not be interested if I were just a carpenter!...

Jim grinned at the look on Selina's face. "I take it that's him?"

"Yes." She grimaced slightly. "I suggest we hurry before he switches to something even more out of his range."

By the time they followed the sound to the right door, the singer had switched to something slightly closer to his vocal range (if not his current ability to carry a tune).

...I'm not crazy, I'm just a little well,
I know right now you can't tell,
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me...

The singer stopped when Selina came in. "Hey, Doc! Whatever was in that last hypo, load another. This is a great hallucination."

"I am not a hallucination. I came get you." She crossed to him and leaned over, cupping his jaw in her hand. "If I release your hands, will you promise not to switch to air guitar?"

He smiled up at her dreamily. "What did I do to get you for a Valkyrie?"

"What is going on here? Where is Mr. Maldi?" A somewhat distracted-looking doctor entered from the next room.

Kirk pointed his phaser at him. "Probably wondering where his other prisoner is. Now move away from that one, nice and slow, with your hands where I can see them. Bones, get him tied down to that other bed."

"Captain Jim? Doctor? Where's Spock?" Sorenson looked around dizzily.

"Just us." Kirk said. "We could only slip two in through the chink in their shields."

He shook his head sadly. "I really thought I'd have come up with something better for an end-of-life fantasy."

"You are very much alive." Selina tweaked his beard to prove it as she reached across to free his other arm. One eyebrow ascended as she noted the direction of his gaze. "But if you do not put eyes forward, Mister Sorenson, you really do have a death wish."

"Ma'am, I was just - argh!" He grimaced in pain. "...damn truth serum... Sorry. You're my best friend, but you're also very female, really close, and I'm running a couple of liters low on inhibitions right now." He covered his eyes with his free hand.

Jim coughed to avoid laughing at the blush taking over the red-head's face. "Hey, cut the guy a break. It's all I can do keep my eyes from wandering and I'm totally sober."

Sorenson kept his eyes covered, but smiled. "Thank you, Captain Jim. I knew there was a reason Spock liked you."

Spock liked him? Jim found himself smiling despite the sharp look from Selina as he began unfastening the straps on Sorenson's legs.

Selina peeled Faf's hand away from his face and waited until he peeked up at her with one eye. "It is not as though you do not look when you are sober. You just try to be considerably more subtle." She lifted a knowing eyebrow and pressed a finger to his lips before he could protest. "Truth serum, remember?"

He clamped his mouth shut and she slid an arm under his shoulders to help him up. "Do you think you can walk?"

"A little unsteadily maybe, but yes." He paused, looking toward Jim. "Wait, if you're here, who's firing on the ship?"

Selina and Jim exchanged a look. Bones came over, scowled at the biosensor display and rounded on the other doctor. "What sort of witch's brew did you give him?"

The doctor quailed. "It wasn't my fault. He was resisting and Mr. Maldi gave him the second dose of verasitol before I could explain."

"Explain!" McCoy growled. "That stuff isn't exactly standard pharmacology to begin with and you let someone give a patient a double dose! I hope Hippocrates himself hits you with every curse in the oath."

"It wasn't double! He got the other dose I had prepared for her." The other doctor flinched under the glare that comment earned. "I gave him inaprovaline when it caused a seizure but after he came around he started talking about some ...goddess who put a spell on him."

Sorenson burst out laughing and nearly fell off the bed into Selina. "Seiðkona - witch. I swear, I've never called you - unnh." He clutched his head. "Okay, there was that time on Io station, but you knew I was joking...errrg...and maybe a couple other times, but I was 19 and drunk, so those do not count." He hung his head muttering. "If I ever find out who invented verasitol no computer will ever work right for him again."

Selina appeared to be using every ounce of Vulcan training to keep a straight face. She ruffled his hair. "I think we are even. I have referred to you as Loki a few times."

He smiled at her gratefully. "I don't think I've ever said it, but comparisons to The Morrigan have occasionally come to mind." He slid off the bed, shook his head and blinked several times. "Whoa, when did you become a trinity?"

"Lie down before you fall down." McCoy ordered. "Inaprovaline on top of snake oil. I'm surprised you're only seeing triple."

"I also gave him peridaxon." the other doctor offered timidly. "Because he was delusional."

"Delusional?" McCoy asked.

"Only when the wind blows north by northwest." Sorenson grinned. "I figured doc here might eventually come up with a combination to take me out before Maldi got back."

"Where did you get your medical degree? Some print-your-own diploma mill?" McCoy glowered at the other doctor. "Irregular heartbeat, blood pressure fluctuating, neurochemistry readings all haywire. With all this stuff in his system, I don't -"

Alarms went off and and a voice came over the intercom. "Security alert! Prisoner has escaped. All hands, security alert."

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AN: Allen has finally gotten some real benefit from reading his dad's books: A kenning is a sort of metaphor frequently employed in skaldic literature. The metaphor is obvious to those familiar with the culture and mythos, but can be a mystery to those outside. In Örvar-Odd's Saga, the seiðkona carries a distaff which allegedly has the power of causing forgetfulness in one who is tapped three times on the cheek by it. The Morrigan is a Celtic goddess of war (and may have been part of a triple goddess). She is seriously scary - usually depicted with a broadsword in each hand or disguised as a carrion crow whose call sows confusion the minds of the enemy. (yes, Selina would consider that reference a compliment.)

Sorenson's first song is taken from a real parody called I am the Very Model of a Modern Starfleet Admiral. The second is from How I Used to Be, a. complete anachronism, but the words kinda fit.

Both peridaxon and inaprovaline are drugs from the canon and can be found in memory-alpha. Using them together is probably not recommended.