Running away, Part 2


Harry, after somehow managing to make it out of privet drive unscathed, summoned the knight bus and made his way to Diagon Alley. Most of his totally awesome plan depended on the goblins. They were going to prove to him how evil and manipulative Dumbdore was! Seriously, Harry is the last of a noble pure-blood family, he must be rich!

Dumbledore must be trying to steal his inheritance!

The vault in Gringotts must be just a trust vault, Draco was rich, so harry must be rich! Its not like it was possible that the Potters were a minor pure-blood family.

There were no poor pure-bloods!

Except the Weasleys... They don't count…

Anyways... He must be rich!

And he must be powerful politically!

He was a Potter! He probably had a seat on the wizengamot that Dumbledore was keeping from him!

It was all coming together...


He made his way up to the Goblin, and quickly demanded service.

"As head of the noble house of Potter, I demand to see the head of the bank!" he shouted.

His outburst was greeted with the sound of laughter. Not just from the Goblin he was addressing, but from every person and goblin within earshot.

Calming his features, and wiping a tear from his eye, the Goblin asked, "I'm sorry, could you repeat that...?"

"I said I demand to speak with the head of the bank!"

The Goblin let out an amused chuckle. "And why, prey tell, would the head of the bank want to talk to you?" he asked, barely holding back his laughter.

"I am the head of a Honorable and Noble house! Surely the head of the bank can spare a few minutes to speak with one of his most important clients!"

"True on both counts, but you are most assuredly not an 'important client' as it were."

"What!?"

"Well, if Lucius Malfoy or his heir had made the same demands I would usher him into Ragnok's office post-haste, but you are not him, and I am not inclined to cater to the every whim of a spoiled half-blood heir to a minor pure-blood family."

"The Potters are not a 'minor pure-blood family'!"

"Yes they are. You are the heir to a very minor family, and a modest sized vault."

"Modest vault? You mean to say that my family vault is no bigger than my trust vault?!"

"Trust vault! Who told you that you had a trust vault?"

"Um, no one, but I just assumed..."

"Well, just to set the matter straight, your 'trust vault', as it were, is in fact your family vault."

"But... I thought the Potters were a wealthy family?"

"Maybe they were during your grandparent's time, but your father was spoiled rotten as a child, furthermore as an adult he was reluctant to find a job, but was still happy to spend the family fortune."

"So um... I'll need to find a job after Hogwarts?"

"I see your father's more slothful qualities have passed on, yes you will need a job after Hogwarts."

"Are you sure that Dumbledore isn't stealing all my money?"

"Positive."

"Well... okay... anyways, there are still some things I need you to take care of."

"Such as?"

"Well, I'll need to take over my wizengamot seat."

"What seat?"

"The Potter seat."

"There is no Potter seat."

"What?!"

"What, do you think every pure-blood deserves a seat? What else?"

"Well… I've never received my monthly statements in the post."

"Gringotts doesn't offer any such feature."

"What?"

"You don't expect us to sort through the piles of gold in every vault every month do you? Gringotts prides itself on its privacy and most of our clients would be very reluctant to have goblins going through their vaults."

"Well then how do you assess interest?"

"We don't. That would hurt the bottom line. No, think of Gringotts as a storage facility. We store your gold, and you pay rent to store said gold."

"Well... okay... Do you have something that will allow me to access my vault without having to go down there every time?"

"No, what do you mean?"

"Like a bag that links dirctly to my vault? Or perhaps like a muggle credit card?"

"No, Gringotts does no offer a service like that."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Okay, um, can you provide me with a goblin portkey?"

"Goblin portkey? Where do you get these ideas…? Going through the ministry is the only legal means to acquire a portkey."

"Well, can you remove the ministry trackers on my wand?"

"Firstly, the trace is not on your wand, but on you. Secondly, did you just seriously ask a goblin to break the law to help a wizard?"

"Forget I asked."

"I might, for a fee."

"Is fifty galleons a good number?"

"Make it a hundred."

"Done." he said, as he slid a small bag of gold towards the goblin.

"Anything else we can do for you?"

"Can you get me a muggle passport? Or a drivers license?"

"Are you really asking for us to break the law again?"

"No, never mind."

"Are we done?"

"Um, one last thing, is there a way for me to take a blood ritual to see if I'm the heir to some unknown fortune like the Hogwarts founders, or Merlin?"

The goblin blinked for a few moments before saying, "That, we can do. Would you like this to be done now?"

"Yes, right away."

"There is normally a wait, but if you are willing to pay a 'line hopping' premium, then you can have it done right away."

"How much?"

"An extra fifty percent markup."

"Okay, do it."

"Excellent. Right this way Mr. Potter." the goblin said, as he led Harry to a back room.


"The ritual is complete, Mr. Potter, would you like your results in written from?"

"No, just tell me! Is it Merlin? Gryffindor?"

"Mr. Potter, you are the heir to... The Potter family..."

"…What?"

"That will be one thousand five hundred galleons please."

…But then again, wizards are stupid.


AN: Gringotts is a bank. Not a concierge service. They don't do every possible service under the sun. Having them do so is the mark of a lazy writer.

Or a stupid wizard.

BTW, I am still in need of a beta, anyone interested? Pretty pretty please?