Disclaimer: I am not J.K. Rowling.
Much, much thanks to Escoger; he basically co-wrote this chapter and encouraged me to keep going even when my energy has been nil.
The Dool Tree
Chapter 12
She didn't blame Snape for what happened in the library, which she found odd considering the circumstances of her exile. Her vindictive focus was instead on Lily.
There was some shame in hating the future holder of Harry's womb, but Hermione couldn't help but despise the woman. Why had James Potter married such a contrary, supercilious witch as Lily Evans?
Then Hermione remembered, with jarring accuracy, the dissonance between the fond memoirs of James left by the Marauders and the reality of his bullying of Snape.
I suppose they deserve each other, then, she pondered, but then she began to wonder how her world could have possibly ended up the way it had. Because she couldn't conceive, based on what she'd seen in this new era, how James Potter and Lily Evans might be so well remembered in her lifetime while Severus Snape was still reviled.
Then again, she recalled with annoyance, did I ever get an opinion from an objective bystander of the time? A Ravenclaw of their year, or a Hufflepuff? Have I even talked to a single Slytherin who went to school with the Marauders around?
There came to mind only Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy, whom she'd met only once or twice, and she'd never had a proper conversation with them whatsoever. Their son--Draco--does respect Snape, so it seems. Is it just because of the Slytherin bond, or is it something more?
Thinking about it made her brain hurt in a way that didn't come from trying to remember the names and properties of all the pain-reducing herbs, or from trying to name all the monarchs of England. It hurt in the kind of way that she got when trying to figure out the potential reactions of adding the wrong ingredient into a potion. Her brain got numb, her ears started buzzing a little, and the focus of her vision became her nose.
Giving it up for a bad job, Hermione begrudgingly made her way to her bed and settled down on it to work. She hated to work horizontally, but if she sat straight she'd get arm pains from holding up her books, if she hunched over she'd get back pains, and laying on her stomach to work made her terribly sleepy, and gosh darn it why didn't Hogwarts include desks in their rooms! She couldn't understand it, except maybe it was to prevent bookworms (like herself) from spending all day cooped up in the dormitories without socializing. Which, she admitted, was a fairly benign and practical plot, as much of a nuisance it was for her.
Granted, though she didn't allow herself the confession, the whole issue wasn't really the pains in the arms or back, nor the falling-asleep or a wish to fulfill the most psychologically healthy thing to do. It was the fact that she had been replaced. Sure, Snape might fancy Lily Evans, but did he really have to be second part of the old one-two punch and force her to leave like he had?
It was painful enough being abandoned, but it certainly smarted to know that she could be replaced, and so quickly too. Still...I suppose that what he did might be 'excusable', as he does fancy the girl, and I wasn't doing a very good job at keeping calm. Besides, Hermione admitted to herself with a scowl, it's not like I have anyone else I could call my friend at this point.
Suddenly, the door to the room opened with a high-pitched creaking noise and Dorcas Meadowes walked in, scowling at the offending entryway with a glare in her eyes and a mutter of 'Blasted door'. This comment was odd, juxtaposed as it was with the humming of a popular Weird Sisters refrain. Dorcas proceeded in an aimless fashion to her trunk, opened it, and started to change into a set of hideous yellow pajamas.
Hermione, feeling it best not to let her roommate know that she was out of sorts at the moment, decided to also begin her nightly ablutions and strode over to her own trunk. However, as she was about to slip out of her robes, she was interrupted by a soft meow. Apparently, Palsy felt that after nearly two days of neglect and inattention, it was time that she did something about it.
Turning to look into its small, scrunched-up little face, Hermione couldn't help herself from letting lose a sigh of exasperation, shaking her head ruefully. "Alright, Palsy, you can sit on my lap as we read together. Is that alright? I'm really sorry that I haven't been spending time with you, but I've just been so busy..."
The kitten let out a small meow of apparent agreement and allowed Hermione to pick it up as the girl went over and sat on the edge of the bed. Pulling out the Arithmancy book that she had planned to read at the library, she buried herself in the book, scratching the top of Palsy's head absentmindedly.
Dorcas' eyes followed them both curiously, droplets of water dripping down her cheeks as she toweled off her face after spraying it with a bit of water from a quick charm. Finally, she commented in a quiet voice, "Your kitten is adorable. What's her name?"
"His name," said Hermione, emphasizing the grey-haired kitten's proper gender. Still, she smiled kindly as she spoke, although she wasn't much interested in talking at this point at all or with Dorcas in particular. "is Palsy. He's a Russian Blue, and he really is adorable, isn't he? I got him because well...he reminded me of a dear...friend of mine because he's always so...enthusiastic." Hermione felt her cheeks warm as she said this, and she hoped that she wasn't being too obvious as to her feelings for Ron.
However, Dorcas apparently didn't miss the rapid pinkening of her cheeks, and she smirked mischievously. "Ah, that's some friend now, isn't it?"
Hermione felt that the best course of denial would be to say nothing, but she still allowed an embarrassed grin to slip onto her face as she returned her attention to the kitten. As she scratched him behind the ears, Palsy started to purr contentedly and nuzzled her finger, causing Dorcas to let out an 'Aw...' at the sight.
The two girls then spent several minutes watching how the small kitten reacted when one or the other scratched it behind its ears, on the neck, on the back, or on its belly. Palsy loved the attention, purring up a storm and looking up at each of the two girls adoringly whenever they touched him. As she did so, she felt a bit of the tension in regards to the confrontation with Snape and Li...Evans fade away, as really it was just a minor incident in the great scheme of things.
Still, Hermione remained silent in regards to the Ron situation, not really wanting to discuss him; in addition to the fact that it was so embarrassing to talk about, there was the added danger of revealing something that would let the other girl know she was from the future, something that Headmaster Dumbledore had expressly forbade.
Finally, Dorcas spoke up, idly curling some of her stringy brown hair around her finger as she giggled. "Well, you don't need to worry; your secret's safe with me. I know what it's like to like someone who doesn't really notice you." She leaned back on Hermione's bed, talking up towards the ceiling, her face red. "The guy I like probably doesn't even have the slightest idea how I feel about him; I mean, I make a point to hang around with him all the time, doing stuff with him when he's not busy with his other friends...but I don't know if he notices any of it. He's not the most brave or confident of fellows, probably why he spends all his time with Potter's gang, but he can be really sweet and kind when he's not around them."
Dorcas looked up at Hermione and smiled, an embarrassed smile lighting up her face. "Every Tuesday and Thursday though, before classes, we make a point to do the Daily Prophet's cross-words together. And sometimes he even reads me poetry, although it's probably just because James needs all the help he can get when it comes to Lily, you know? So you see, your secret's safe with me."
As the other girl returned to her bed, drawing the curtains around her, Hermione smiled. If anything, she was jealous of Dorcas, as the girl got the opportunity to spend a great deal of time with the boy she was clearly utterly smitten with. Doing cross-words together...not really my thing, but I'm sure that it would be fun for a lot of people, especially with those they love. thought Hermione to herself fondly. I'd sure like to do something like that with Ron, not cross-words of course, those are silly, but something like...something like...well, we could snog I suppose, but what else?
She frowned, brow furrowing, troubled that she wasn't quite able to picture doing anything with Ron, just alongside him. Well, I guess that we'd just do something that the two of us both like to do, something we both have in common. I mean, how hard could that be? We have all sorts of stuff in common, like...
Something like... Hermione's frown deepened. Something like... What do we have in common?
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