A/N: I am trying to update as soon as I can, but I can't do it every day. I try to often, though, so please forgive me. I know I am pretty awful… I hope no one has deleted me yet… Thank you for the reviews.

Disclaimer: Twilight is amazing.

I love Emmett, Alice, & Carlisle, but I do not own them or the story from which they come.

**sie**

-I love all the characters, but those are my favorites-

(I wonder which ones SM likes more…?)

This is dedicated to my Twin- because I feel like it, and she doesn't have internet at the moment... Ha, ha. 8-)



Impossible, was all I could think.

Impossible.

"So, what… you are saying is that… Rose… is… is going to… be…" I trailed off. I couldn't even think the words, let alone speak them. I was shocked. These thoughts were shocking. It couldn't happen…

It was impossible.

Alice knew this, but still she spoke the words that I couldn't…

"Rosalie is going to be turned into a human again."


A/N: (I listened to The Gift by Seether while I wrote this chapter… It may help with the effect on some parts to listen to it…)

7. Willing To Give

I was shocked- so shocked; there would need to be another word added to the dictionary- along with the word to describe my confusion for all of this new information- to describe my shock.

Clearly, I had to have mistaken what Alice had just said- though I knew, deep down, that I hadn't misunderstood her. Alice had spoken too clearly for me to doubt a single syllable that left her mouth. Yet all I could force myself to think of in this newfound confusion and shock was:

Impossible.

It seemed that I had been thinking that a lot today- how impossible everything was- and yet, the impossible seemed to keep occurring:

Vampires can't shed tears, it's impossible. Yet Alice- a vampire- had shed a tear not that long ago.

Vampires can't become human again, it's impossible. But Alice had had a vision about Rosalie doing just that, not too long ago. Then, I remembered an earlier thought that I had had:

Vampires can't blow up, it's impossible. Well, at least that one hadn't occurred yet…

At the time.

Alice, sensing my inability to speak, continued on…

"I have no doubt what must be going through your mind, Bella. You must be thinking that it is all impossible; that it can't happen. You might also be thinking that I have gone completely mental and my brain is completely gone…" She was completely, and absolutely, accurate in both of her assumptions. Alice had to have lost it; after all- it was all impossible. Maybe we were re-defining the term… Who knew?

"At first," She continued. "At first- after the vision- I was thinking the same things that you are now; I was so sure that I had gone completely nuts… like that squirrel from earlier that you totally put into some sort-of slow-mo mess; it was totally amazing- I mean-"I cut Alice off right there, to remind her that she needed to finish her previous thought before "Alice-Jumping" to another one.

"Right," She said. "Well, I was thinking that there was no way that any of that vision could really happen, but I saw Rose and she had her original eye color and- you won't believe this- she was pregnant! I couldn't believe it-" Alice continued with her excitement about her vision. I stopped listening- wrapped up in my own excitement.

Rose- a human again? It had just occurred to me- finally set in- Rosalie was going to be a human again. I smiled at the thought. That was all she ever wanted, to be human; to live. I was happy for her. Happy seemed like too small a word. I couldn't put into words how wonderful it would be to see Rosalie that way- so fulfilled with the one thing she ever wanted. I wondered what I would be able to do to make that a reality for her; it would be the ultimate gift to give…

Alice seemed to know what I was thinking… again. And, suddenly, she took on the look of pain and sadness that I had seen so much today.

I wish I knew the whole reason she kept looking that way; I know it is my death, but what in the world could that have to do with Rosalie.

I seemed to finally find my voice, and said to Alice:

"Ali, you were so, so happy just a second ago… What is it now? This is good news, Alice- Rosalie will be human again," I said with a smile "Why are you looking like you are on your way to a funeral?" I noticed how… ironic that question really was, and I didn't stop to think that it might make Alice worse.

It did.

Of course.

I just couldn't say any of the right things today. I seemed to keep making things worse. I need to work on my consoling skills, I thought icily to myself.

Alice was turning away from me now. I went to catch her arm, but she snarled at me.

Alice never snarls at me. Ever.

I looked at her with a very shocked expression. She seemed to realize what she had done because she instantly looked to my eyes for forgiveness.

"I'm sorry, Bella, I just…"

"I wish that I could finish what you were going to say, Alice, but I don't know." I didn't know. I didn't know anything at this moment.

"I suppose I should tell you… now…" She stopped and looked at me again- measuring my reaction. I nodded for her to continue; I didn't want to say anything that would set her on edge again.

If Alice has ever snarled at you, then you know that she is not the cute and innocent pixie she appears to be all the time.

If Alice has never snarled at you, then I would give anything to be you at the present time.

Evil pixie is not pleasant right now.

"Do you mind if I give it to you flat out- no short-cuts or sugar-coating it?" Alice asked. She sounded… exasperated… angry… a bit of regret on the edges.

Why?

"Go ahead, Ali, whatever is best for you."

She seemed to take that in- making sure I could handle what she was about to disclose to me, and then she said the last thing that I had been expecting to hear:

"Bella, you are going to…" Alice seemed to be thinking over the entire dictionary in her mind, trying to find a suitable word, "… blow up… I guess you could say… and that explosion is what causes… Rosalie… to become human again." She was thinking again. Probably wondering if she said everything correctly.

Alice was right.

There was absolutely no sugar-coating.

I looked at Alice in shock. She looked at me, expressionless. She seemed to realize that I was in a bit of a mental lock-down, and she tried to ease me into acceptance.

"I am still not really sure how you die… I don't know if it is the blowing up… or something after that… It seems like you lived, but… but I could be… wrong… I'm never wrong… I have no idea… I don't know… I can't see…" She was losing her brave face with every word she spoke. Alice was slowly sinking into her tearless sobs of hysteria again.

I couldn't let that happen.

Not again.

"Alice, hey… We are going to figure this out, together…"

And then something happened that Alice couldn't have seen, and I couldn't have predicted…

How we didn't hear her before, I will never know…

Rosalie stepped out from behind the tree that I had obliterated not thirty minutes before.

She wore an unreadable expression. She probably meant it to look tough, like she was holding her head up high so that she would look brave. Rose had- no doubt- heard this most recent part of my and Alice's conversation.

Rose's topaz eyes skimmed over the scene before her, though she had probably been watching from her place behind the tree…

She saw Alice, head in her hands- she hadn't seen Rose yet, again, a mystery- and Rose's gaze fell on me. I knew that she was trying to look brave and strong- unreadable- but I saw the brief glimmer of triumph in her eyes- no doubt from the fact that I would make her human again. There was also a little…

Remorse?

Could Rosalie be feeling remorse? I thought. I wasn't feeling it. I would do anything for any of my family members, and if dying to make Rose happy was the way to do that, then bring on the coffin- no pun intended… well, maybe a little…

It surprised me that I didn't mind that I would die- that I could joke about it. After all, my death would end with Rosalie's complete contentment as a human- and for someone to be happy because of me makes me feel all the better; even if it is Rosalie- the one in the family that had resented me most of the time… Maybe… maybe that was why I was so willing? I wanted to finally gain her full acceptance of me… But the only time Rose had felt only resentment towards me, was before I had Renesmee…

Renesmee… What would she do when she found that I was going to die? Maybe she wouldn't know until after the fact… Alice couldn't have told her- she wouldn't be able to keep it from me if she did…

"Renesmee…" I was only thinking it, but I realized that I had done the smallest mumble possible when Alice's head snapped up, and Rosalie's small look of regret took over.

Rose was feeling regret…?

Wow.

Not something that happens often. Or ever.

Alice noticed Rosalie and started to bombard her with questions… I wasn't paying attention to either of them anymore, so I'd no idea what they were arguing or talking about.

I was thinking about the family.

I was thinking about everyone that I had come to be so close to in the past few years- even before Edward and I had gotten married…

I was pulled out of my reverie by Alice and Rosalie both saying loudly:

"Bella…"

I looked up to their faces- which were both, once again, unreadable. They have really perfected that, I thought.

"What is it?" I asked. I could feel myself giving in to this day. I needed to leave. I needed to get to my house and think for a while.

Oh, how I wish I could sleep.

Although, the dreams might be something I could live without after everything that had happened within this short time…

Time doesn't matter to immortals…

Or it shouldn't…

But right now, it was all I could think of.

Neither Alice nor Rosalie responded, so I continued, "I need to… go to my house for a while… I will see you two later…"

I looked to Rose for her reaction- momentarily forgetting Alice. Her face was blank, but I could tell she was thinking about something…

They both nodded to me- understanding that I needed to be alone; Alice would probably fill Rose in on some things… Though, I had a feeling that Alice still thought that secrecy was needed for the most part.

I began to put little things together in my own head during the run to my house…

It was ironic to me that my ability, my extra… thing- my gift would be giving Rosalie what she has wanted for a forever now- literally. And I didn't even care what it would cost me… It would be like giving a friend the very expensive bracelet that she has wanted for a long time- only I had a feeling this was a lot bigger than that…

But I found comfort in the fact that my gift would mean something…

My gift would be a... giving gift.

RosaliePOV (In her mind only)

Hold me now I need to feel relief
Like I never wanted anything
I suppose I'll let this go and find a reason I'll hold on to
I'm so ashamed of defeat
And I'm out of reason to believe in me
I'm out of trying to get by

I'm so afraid of the gift you give me
I don't belong here and I'm not well
I'm so ashamed of the lie I'm living
I'm right on the wrong side of it all

I can't face myself when I wake up
And look inside a mirror
I'm so ashamed of that thing
I suppose I'll let it go
'till I have something more to say for me
I'm so afraid of defeat
And I'm out of reason to believe in me
I'm out of trying to defy

I'm so afraid of the gift you give me
I don't belong here and I'm not well
I'm so ashamed of the lie I'm living
I'm right on the wrong side of it all

Hold me now I need to feel complete
Like I matter to the one I need

I'm so afraid of the gift you give me
I don't belong here and I'm not well
I'm so ashamed of the lie I'm living
I'm right on the wrong side of it all

Now I'm ashamed of this
I Am So Ashamed Of This
Now I'm so ashamed of me
I Am So Ashamed Of Me...


A/N: I am so, so sorry the chapter isn't longer- the length that you deserve after the long wait.

I am really, really sorry, but I have not been feeling well- it has been a very hard week- and it was a struggle to write this chapter- but I hope it doesn't show; I really hope there aren't that many mistakes…

Please forgive me if there is an unforgivable amount of mistakes (redundant, I know)

I hope no one has deleted me from their lists… I'm really sorry… I get to go to the carnival tomorrow; that's the only thing that got me through this week…

Click Here.

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