Once Upon A Time
Dagian pulled the blanket around her shoulders and curled as tightly as she could in bed and watched the fire.
She couldn't get warm no matter how many blankets or furs that she piled on.
After that breakfast, she'd retired to her room and curled up in the bed.
That was her son that she abandoned in the next cabin. She hadn't quite known what to expect from herself when she saw the fourteen year old boy, but what did hit were guilt and anger and grief over what she'd put him through by not being there.
He bore a lot of resemblance to his father or at least how his father used to be. She was grateful for that at least. Maybe she would actually be able to look at him in the face if she wasn't looking at a mirror of herself.
Oh gods, she was such a selfish cow for what she put them through by leaving because she couldn't take it anymore. Filib had thought that she should stop punishing herself. He didn't understand. She would never be able to do that and now that she was living right next to them it made it worse.
Especially with what her husband had become. Perahps if she had been there, she would able to sotp him from doing…whatever it was that he did to make himself turn into this.
She cried herself into a fitful sleep and she woke up feeling ill. She couldn't get warm, the headache she was suffering from made her susceptible to light and sound, and her stomach rolled as if she was on a ship.
The door opened and she forced her eyes open to see her husband stroll into the cabin.
"Oh for the sake of the gods," she muttered, "What do you want?"
"Bringing you for the sake of our son isn't going to work if you keep hiding in here," he told her, "Oh you look horrible."
She would've thought of a remark back but nausea rolled over her again and she buried her face in the pillow to keep from losing what little of breakfast she COULD put in her stomach.
She flinched and pulled away when her husband put his hands against her cheek and forehead, "My gods woman, you're burning up."
She would've said something but she felt incredibly weak.
He muttered something probably expletory under his breath and hovered his hand over her head. Her eyes widened when she realized that he was trying to heal her with dark magic and shoved his hand away. Magic like that left a mark on someone's soul that risked changing them. She was already a despicable person, she didn't want to make it any worse.
"Of course you'd be stubborn," he muttered and placed his hands under her back and knees.
"Don't." she warned as he lifted her up.
"YOu're sick dearie and I believe you're about to get worse. I'm not going to let you waste away in here."
"You did this," she accused.
"I can honestly say that I have absolutely nothing to do with the idea of you throwing up in my cabin. Dearie, this is probably due to your inability to take care of yourself recently."
She didn't argue that point, she worked herself too hard and rested and ate too little until yesterday.
It'd been only a day? Had it only been that short of a time?
Her husband must've used his magic to move them to the other cabin because she knew he didn't take them outside.
"Papa?"
He…not so much placed her on the bed as he dropped her on the bed and she turned over on her stomach and wrapped her arms around the pillow.
"Your mother's not doing very well," he said simply, "She needs some rest."
Present Day.
Gold tried to control his racing mind as his wife slept next to him that following morning.
He had suspected something had been different. He'd been living out of sync with the others for 28 years; he prided himself in knowing most of their moods and behaviors but especially that of his wife. There was still enough of his ability left to sense that there was something…off…with her but he hadn't had the time to put two and two together. He hadn't even thought she was pregnant, especially since she'd displayed no outer signs of being so.
Another time of war was approaching and he was going to be a father again. Yes. It had gone so well last time. And now since the enemy was centered on him because he'd let her know that he remembered, this might not go well. He had to talk Dawn into keeping the pregnancy a secret for as long as possible. Regina would hurt her or their baby to get to him.
He would make Regina regret it if she tried but the damage would be done and he wasn't prepared to sacrifice this little moment of happiness they both had right now for not taking the proper precautions against 'her majesty.'
Dawn thought they could do this relationship thing if they tried but he doubted they would be good parents. Deep down he was a coward and a manipulator and she broke her word and cared far too little about anyone else's wellbeing than what was socially acceptable. Their child would end up more damaged than emotionally intact.
Money only did so little to cure what was born in the bone. Evil was made but he and Dawn had just enough in both of them so that it would come out full force if the right trigger was pressed. It would just lay dormant until then. That much was proven with Regina and countless others he'd seen.
He turned on his side to look at her and wondered what would've happened if things had been different. He knew the dark one before him had planted enough seeds to convince her to leave. He knew that Zoso had gotten her to leave about that as soon as he gained his powers
He doubted many things would've changed, if she stayed she probably would've been conscripted and if she survived that then he wouldn't have listened to her when Baelfire was about to be drafted as well. He would've still become the dark one regardless of how hard she would've begged him not to do it.
Maybe she would've ended up hating him more than she had.
He imagined that opinion was divided over whether or not how they actually turned out was better.
Knowing that things probably wouldn't have changed didn't stop him from thinking about where it had gone wrong. Outside forces had their part to play but inner forces always were what destroyed a relationship.
He figured the decline of the relationship wasn't when she left, wasn't when he forced her back even though those had their parts to play. It had to have been when Bae….
He buried his face in his wife's hair and breathed in her scent to keep from thinking about his son.
If Bae hadn't…been lost, then they would've found a way to be happy. Or at least as happy as they could be. They were working on their relationship but after that happened it was as good as dead.
Now they had this new chance. They were happy and he was going to take advantage of it while it lasted. It would be short lived because whenever they reached this state of bliss something always happened to sweep the rug out from under them. He didn't have to have foresight abilities to know how this would happen. Her memories were going to return when the curse started breaking away and he knew that he would answer for what he'd been doing for the past 28 years.
But then he realized that he inflicted his pain. He'd kept her at his side for 28 years and because of it and because she was several hundred years older than everyone else in the town she was an outcast.
He'd done his job. When she woke up she would be completely miserable. He would have his revenge and for some reason it just didn't feel as satisfying as he was hoping.
Maybe because now he had a baby on the way and there was a part of him that wanted to fight to keep her at his side once she woke up.
Emotional entanglements were a tricky business.
He didn't know if he could love her again. Every instinct was screaming at him not to because he couldn't be hurt after everything they'd done to each other. But maybe he could try. Without him she was going to be completely alone here and Regina would try to exploit that.
Unlike Dawn he wasn't afraid to admit that he cared about her. However he wasn't going to let that affect his judgments on his plan.
Dawn's breathing changed and she opened her eyes just in time to catch him staring at her. A warm smile lit up her face, "Admiring your investment?"
"You've always been more than that," he told her honestly and moved some hair away from her face.
"So I guess you've had time to think about what we talked about yesterday."
"I'm willing to try this out," he told her, "But don't be surprised or disappointed if it doesn't work."
"It will," she promised and wrapped her arms around his neck.
His hand immediately went to her stomach as if the child was old enough to move at its father's touch.
"You can't be sure about that," he said.
She looked at him with wounded eyes, "You still don't think anyone could stay with you? I wish you would trust me darling. I would."
He smiled despite himself and kissed her face.
Oh, if only she knew.
