Once Upon A Time
The sun beat down on Dagian's shoulders as she kneaded bread dough on a bench outside.
It'd been two days after her husband had murdered Dauis and the tension had yet to lessen. Dagian cooked and cleaned for the family, she put on the show of a wife and mother, but she didn't talk to Rumpelstiltskin.
Meals were so tense that one could almost lose their appetite just by sitting there.
Baelfire sat on a bench opposite of her and drank in her movements. This had been the first time he'd really been alone with her. Rumpelstiltskin always took him wherever he went.
Dagian didn't mind. She couldn't look at her son without feeling suffocating guilt. In fact if she had it her way then he wouldn't be out here now, but he had come out here and sat, "You could do that inside."
"I don't want to do it inside," she replied blankly. She looked up as a horse whinnied down the street. She would like nothing more than to climb on that animal and ride away from this village as quickly as possible but she doubted Rumpelstiltskin would let her get far.
And after what she'd seen him do to Dauis, she really didn't want to test his patience.
"Why not?" he asked, "He's not in there."
She tensed. It was bad enough that she had to look at the face of her husband and accept the fact that he wasn't himself anymore. But she didn't want to look in that cabin for a constant reminder, "I just don't like being in there, Baelfire."
A few seconds of silence passed. She was hoping that he'd go and play with the other children but judging from their looks of fear and their averted gazes she got the feeling that her son was paying for the sins of his father.
"Don't let them bother you," she told him when she saw his face fall, "When you walk down the street hold your head high. Don't let them see that they get to you."
"I have nothing to hold my head high about," he muttered.
"You have a father that gave everything he had to protect you. That's more than what any other child out there had."
Bae lowered his head and she realized how harsh her words sounded.
Dear gods she wished she would think before she talked.
"Baelfire, look at me."
He reluctantly raised his gaze
"You do know that no matter what people say…and what you've heard…you do know that this isn't your fault, don't you?"
"He changed because of me."
"And he made that decision to go as far as he did. That's not on your head, that's on his, son."
Bae looked away, "He's so different, now. He pretends that he isn't, but he is. He thinks it'll all go back to normal but…I don't think he knows what to do with his power now."
"Yes Baelfire. I know."
"Did you love him?"
The question and sudden subject change made her look up, "What?"
"Did you love my father?"
She bit the inside of her cheek; she knew where this was leading up to, "When I married your father. I loved him with everything I had."
"Didn't you love me?"
"You were my son. Of course I loved you."
"Then why did you leave?" he demanded angrily.
She lowered her head in shame. She heard the hurt and anger in her son's words and wished that she could jump 14 years back in the past and do it all over again.
"Because I was an idiot," She left the bread and moved to sit next to her son, "Bae…I could never hope to excuse what I did. I know that I have a lot that I need to make up for. And I'm so sorry, Bae. Please forgive me."
"You could've come back."
"Your father deserved better than me," she told him honestly and wiped a tear from her face, "I regretted the choice as soon as I made it."
"Well you're back now."
"Yes. I'm back now," she said with a wry smile, "For better or for worse."
"I just wish it was willing."
She felt her heart break at her son's resignation, "Oh Bae."
She put her hand around her son's shoulders and pressed her lips on the top of his head, she knew that there was no going back at what she was going to say next, "I won't stay for your father. But I give you my word that I won't leave as long as you're here."
"You don't want to be here,"
"But that has nothing to do with you. I'll stay for you. I'll make this right somehow. I'll make up for what I've done. And we'll find a way to change him back."
"What's going on?"
She froze at the telltale snake voice that her husband had adopted for his new identity and immediately averted her gaze so that she wasn't looking into what used to be his brown eyes.
"We were just talking, papa."
She could feel his gaze on her but she didn't look up.
"Well it's nice to see that your mother's adjusting to her homecoming rather nicely."
"Bae," she said and cleared her throat, "Why don't you take the dough inside and then get some water from the well."
Baelfire looked between them and when his father jerked his head to the house Bae stood and did what he was told.
"You beg his forgiveness but you've barely said anything to me," he pointed out.
"Well," she stood and finally looked into those eyes that reminded her of a snake's, "Perhaps when you turn back towards the man that I left behind and not the man that kidnapped me then I'll consider it."
She turned and gave him nothing. She walked away with her head held high.
Present Day
It had taken a little while but Dawn being pregnant had finally sunk in for Gold.
He was going to be a father again. Bae was going to have a sibling. Up until now, he hadn't really thought about it…he hadn't let himself consider it because he hadn't planned for this.
And now he cared about his wife and now he was going to be a father.
If about four and a half months, he would be holding his son or daughter and he didn't know whether or not that idea scared or excited him.
He was going to give that child the world if he or she asked for it.
Their child was going to be spoiled rotten.
He sort of hoped it would be a daughter this time. A son…a daughter…one of each. He could raise this child in a way that he wasn't able to do with Bae. He could give it everything he wanted while retaining at least some of his humanity so that the child could have a father.
And after he'd turned into the dark one, he knew that any chance of having a child was over. Evil wasn't born, it was made. And since the dark one's curse and he were now inseparable, then a child couldn't be born from any union with any woman.
He was sterile and he'd given up any hope of having children in this realm when he'd decided to exact his revenge on Dagian leaving him by making her married to him.
But now things were changed and she was with child.
"Emma let David go," Dawn said as they watched the fire together. Her head rested on his shoulder and their hands were intertwined. She wasn't feeling well; something in the kitchen had upset her stomach. The baby made her sensitive to all kinds of smells; it had even done that when she was pregnant with Bae.
How she got sick from the smell of Lanolin, he'd never know. It was the smell of home.
"And how do you know that, dear?" he asked and rested his head on hers. He really didn't like being involved in this Kathryn Nolan situation. Not with Dawn being pregnant but as long as Regina was walking free then his wife and child were under threat.
And Regina would hurt her too.
"Everyone knows it," she muttered, "Just because I don't have any real friends doesn't mean I don't listen to everyone's conversations around me."
"Oh, that's rude," he teased her and looked at her slightly swollen stomach. It wasn't really noticeable now unless one knew what to look for…but that wouldn't always be the case and it would just be better to get Regina out of the way and get this curse ended so he could set out to find his boy and reunite his family again.
"Is it?" she mused and rested her head on his shoulder, "Guess you didn't marry me for my manners."
As he thought about Regina, he noticed that his hand had subconsciously went over to his wife's stomach.
She looked up at him and her face shone with a glow that she'd had when she was pregnant last time and it occurred to him how much he'd missed that look of joy on her face.
He pressed his lips on her forehand and drew his arms around her.
And for a brief moment, he allowed himself to be completely happy.
