Disclaimer: I do not own Dawson's Creek. I don't even own all of the seasons on DVD. I am just a penniless writer who is doing what I love for free.

He couldn't even see his bedspread. He had pulled every shirt he owned out of his closet and none of them worked. He really needed a new look. He still wore the same straight laced button down shirts and preppy sweaters that he wore in his teens. He shook his head in frustration before deciding on the only casual tee shirt he had. Ironically enough it was something that his mom had bought for him the summer before he graduated from college. It looked brand new. He smoothed the white fabric over his stomach deciding that he didn't look that bad. The shirt even went with his khaki shorts. He slipped on a pair of brown leather flip flops deciding that he had better leave now because if he didn't he would just find some reason or another to not go.

Gretchen had invited him to a barbeque at his house. It wasn't like they would be the only people there, but he still wanted to make a good impression. He grabbed his keys and wallet from the table in the front hall without stopping. He was at Gretchen's less than half an hour later.

There wasn't a single car in the driveway when he pulled up. He walked through the yard hearing noise from the backyard. He opened the door in the gate not sure what he would find. He walked saw a Zen garden with a koi pond off to the right and to the left there was a garden that went from one end of the yard to the other. In the center of the yard there was a patio with a state of the art grill.

Gretchen stepped out the sliding glass door carrying a pitcher of lemonade in one hand a platter of vegetables in the other. Dawson crossed the yard quickly and met her at the table. He took the pitcher from her silently and she set the platter down with a sigh.

"There you go saving me like always. Something's will never change," she teased.

"I doubt that you would have wanted to spray down your patio when you dropped that pitcher. Ants would have descended on us before we knew what hit us," he said with a chuckle.

"You're right, I wouldn't have."

"This is a nice place."

"I got it with my divorce settlement money," she said, looking around the yard with pride.

"It's a far cry from the three bedroom shack that you grew up in isn't it?"

"Yeah, I keep telling my parents that I have enough room for them since dad retired a few years ago. Mom wants to come out here, but he won't budge," she said sadly.

"Am I early, or is everyone else late?" he asked with a nervous laugh.

"It's just you and I tonight. My friends backed out at the last minute."

"That's fine."

"Come on, I'll show you around," she said walking back into the house.

He followed her into the house and she showed him around. The house was a small bungalow and the rooms were tastefully furnished. She walked past a room with a closed door to the guest room. He figured that the closed off room was her room and that she hadn't wanted him to see it. She could be private when she wanted to be and he didn't blame her for it.

Once they were back in the kitchen she offered him a beer than poured herself a glass of wine. Being around her had always put him at ease. She had a calmness about her that he hadn't found in anyone else. She rarely ever lost her grip on reality. She was strong and reliable all though she would deny it if he ever pointed those things out to her.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked, breaking through his thoughts.

"I was just thinking that you haven't changed," he complimented her with a smile.

"I have, my changes are just so subtle that you can't notice them. You've always seen me in a way that other people don't. You have a knack for doing that."

"This is nice, that we're getting to catch up. I always wondered where you went after you left."

"I've been here all along. I've worked for a few magazines before starting my own online magazine. It's nice being the boss, I don't have to worry about losing my job, but I do have to worry about my staff quitting on me if my ego gets too inflated," she said with a shrug.

"I have to agree that I like being in charge. My entire staff depends on me just as much as I depend on them. We're like a family almost. We all have our roles that we play and specific jobs to do. If one of my staff members is going through something they know that they can come to me."

"I'm the same way. Just because I run an online magazine that doesn't mean that I don't interact with my staff. They depend on me to be the problem solver when something goes wrong. I swear there are some days when my mind never shuts off. It just powers down so that I can go to sleep."

"I know the feeling," he said with a nod.

"I'm glad that we got the chance to reconnect. I have regretted the way that I treated you when we were together since the day I left. I'm just glad that you are willing to still be friends with me."

"Me too," he said honestly.

She smiled sadly before turning to open the refrigerator. He hadn't expected her to apologize to him. He had been a naïve kid the last time she had seen him. He had been hung up on her for years and felt like he was living in a dream world and that he would wake up any second and his life would have returned to normal. Those teenage dreams were gone now and he could enjoy being in her company without all of the drama that seemed to follow him back then.

He was grateful for the chance to mend their friendship. He had wondered if he would ever be able to look her in the eye again without feeling remorse. She wasn't the only one who had handled their relationship badly. He was intent on not only getting over Joey but he had grown by leaps and bounds that year only to revert to his old ways once Pacey made a fool out of himself at the end of their senior year. This time he wasn't going to let anything hinder his judgment and he was going to put the time and effort into their friendship that it deserved.

XXXX

Amy was sitting in her booster seat while Jack did the dishes when the front door opened. Doug came to stand at the archway of the kitchen a few seconds later. Jack looked over his shoulder, smiling at him in greeting. Amy raised her arms to Doug so that he would free her from her seat. He grabbed a few wipes from the dispenser and wiped her down before unbuckling her from her seat. She could be heard going down the hall to her bedroom before silence fell over the kitchen.

Doug brought her dirty dishes to the counter before leaning against it. He looked a million miles away as Jack put the last of the dishes in the dishwasher. He wiped down the counter and stove before turning to face him. He looked Doug, his eyebrows furrowed in worry.

He thought that things were getting better for them. Doug had come out to his parents after Christmas and while his mother was fine with it his father had been giving him the silent treatment. Jack wanted to remind him that John Witter's opinion didn't matter to him one bit. He had known the kind of person he was before they got together and he knew that things weren't going to be easy.

He would never understand why Doug needed his father's approval. He had lived the better part of a year without his father's approval before his father realized that he couldn't change him. He needed to talk to Doug about the importance of standing for himself again. He couldn't please everyone all the time.

"Jack?" Amy called from her room.

He walked through the house wondering if things were ever going to change. He had enough to deal with; he didn't Doug weighing down on top of everything else.

Amy sat on the floor with the pair of pajamas he had gotten out before dinner sitting next to her. She held her favorite book in one hand and clutched her teddy bear to her with the other. He smiled down at her as he made his way into the room.

"It's too early to go to bed Pumpkin. You still need a bath."

"No baff," she said stubbornly, her bottom lip jutted out.

A familiar tug at his heart made him smile sadly. Even though she was only two, she had Jen's signature pout down pat. He carried her to the living room and got her settled on the couch then put on her favorite movie. Doug hadn't moved since Jack had seen him five minutes before.

"Is something wrong?" Jack asked.

"No," Doug said quietly.

"Are you sure? You can tell me," Jack prodded.

Doug shook his head, the crease across his forehead growing deeper.

"There's something that I need to talk to you about," Jack broached.

That got Doug's attention; at least he was looking Jack directly in the eye.

"I talked to your mom this afternoon. She's offered to watch Amy since Misses Ryan can't keep up with her."

"Did you ask, or did she offer?"

"I just said that she offered Doug," Jack said with a light laugh.

"Sorry, I was thinking about something else," he said gruffly.

"That's been happening a lot lately."

"I've got a lot going on Jack. What do you expect?" he asked with an attitude.

"I wasn't complaining. And for your information, I have just as much going on as you do. I have a stack of forty papers that I need to grade before tomorrow, plus I'm taking care of Amy by myself," he said in defense.

"You knew that raising her wasn't going to be easy."

"I thought that we would be raising her together, like we talked about," he said with a sigh.

"I've gotta go," Doug said shaking his head in remorse.

"Go. It's what's you do best. You can take on everyone else's problems but yet you won't deal with the ours," Jack accused.

Doug shut the front door silently knowing that Jack was right. He thought that he was ready to handle everything that Jack was willing to give him. His dad's reaction to everything had shaken him to his core. He thought that his dad would respect him for willing to be honest with him. Pacey had yet to call him to tell him he told you so, so maybe his little brother did have thicker skin than he did like he had always assumed he had.

He needed to get his head on straight before facing Jack again. He wanted things to work with Jack more than he had ever wanted anything else in his entire life. He knew that if he didn't change he would lose Jack for good. He couldn't let that happen. Jack was the only person that had taken the time to break through all of his walls, more than once. He would never understand how he had gotten so lucky.

XXXX

Jack carried Amy on his hip down the hall. The smell of urine and ammonia filled the air making him scrunch up his nose in disgust. He thought that this was an assisted living community, not a retirement home. This wasn't what he wanted for Misses Ryan.

Amy buried her face in his shoulder before tightening her grip on his neck. He stopped outside of apartment number 209 listening for any noise from inside. He hoped that she was doing better than the last time he had seen her. She had told him that she was fine but he could see that she had lost weight and that she had lost some of her color.

This was his first time coming here, she had been adamant that she didn't want him here. Now he understood why. He knocked on the door and he heard someone on the other side less than a minute later.

Evelyn opened the door, clutching her robe to her to ward off the chill of the hall. She had lost more weight and her skin was a sickly yellow. She gave him a reprimanding look before opening the door to him.

"It is too cold for that baby to be out. Let me see her," Evelyn said, deftly taking the focus off of herself.

Jack pulled off Amy's boots and snow suit before letting her walk to Misses Ryan. Amy climbed into her lap and played with Misses Ryan's hand happily.

"She's getting bigger," she observed.

"Yes Ma'am, she was twenty inches and fifteen pounds when I took her to get her flu shot last week."

"She'll be tall and slender like her father no doubt," Evelyn said with tightly pursed lips.

CJ was a sore subject with her. She had been leery to trust him from the moment she first saw him. She had tried to warn Jen that he wasn't good for her but Jen hadn't listened. She had said that he was the first guy since Dawson that made her happy and made her feel loved so Jack had left it at that. Evelyn hadn't even gloated or chided Jen when CJ left when she was four months pregnant.

"Have you talked to Douglas lately?"

"I almost got into an argument with him last night."

"Was it about his father again?" she asked in concern.

"Yes and no, we were arguing because I don't know where I stand with him. His parents were mentioned. His mom wants to help with watching Amy while I am at work."

"That's nice of her," she said with a warm smile.

"I can only imagine what Mr. Witter thinks," he said with an eye roll.

"Does what he thinks really matter?"

"It matters to Doug. His father is the elephant in the room that I am not allowed to talk about," he said with a sigh.

"He cares for you, that is easy to see. He needs more time. He isn't used to not having to hide how he feels. That's a big adjustment for anyone."

Jack nodded looking down at his hands. Amy turned her head to look up at Evelyn before putting a hand on her arm.

"Momma," Amy said quietly.

"No, Sweet Child, Gram," she corrected her gently.

"Jack," she said pointing to Jack.

"Very good, now who am I?"

"Momma."

Jack cleared his throat as tears welled up in Evelyn's eyes. He picked up Amy's things before getting her ready to leave. He didn't feel that it was right to stay. Gram was having trouble adjusting to the fact that Jen was gone and having Amy mistake her for Jen was just making things worse.

"I'll come by after work tomorrow," he promised.

"Remember what I said Jack. Don't push Douglas; he'll come to you when he is ready. I would like it if Amy had the both of you to take care of her."

"Yes Ma'am," he said with a nod.

He was able to put Amy in her car seat and get behind the wheel before the tears started to flow. He didn't like the situation that he was put in any more than Doug or Grams did but he was making the most of it. He couldn't picture anyone else raising Amy. He thought of CJ and the precious moments that he was missing out on because he had chosen not to be a father. One day he would try to get in touch with him and tell him about all of the things that he had missed. One day when the nerves weren't still raw and Amy was older.

AN: Amy's father's name isn't mentioned on the show, but there has been a lot of speculation that CJ was her father. So that is why I am saying that he is her father for this story.