A/N: Ok, so reporting is finally over (almost- still a mass amount of proofreading to do) But anyway, my brain is now freed up to think about the goings on of Twilight, as opposed to writing comments on how each particluar student has performed in regards to reading, writing, speaking and listening. For any Australian readers, that was how I got to spend my entire long weekend...
Anyway, that is my vent (I really do love my job). I want to thank everyone for their patience for this update. Onto the happy, happy, joy, joy stuff. Thank you to everyone who continues to read this fic. An even bigger thank you to those who have been this fic to their favourites, story alerts etc etc. And the extra special, super jumbo sized thank you to those who took the time to review and let me know what you think. Your enthusiasm boosts my motivation to such a high level. I feel so guilty that I can't update every single day.
Right, I have already made you wait long enough. Enough of me, and on with the fic...
Music: Covers Are Thrown- Josh Pyke, Fall At Your Feet- Clare Bowditch, One Crowded Hour- Augie March
Seth paused at the front door, wondering if he should knock. It was his home after all, but after his time away it really did not feel that way. With a shake of his head, he pushed the door open. Whatever he felt it didn't matter. He could only imagine his mother's reaction if he actually knocked.
"Mum," he called out, making his way down the hall.
"Seth?" he could hear Sue's voice coming from the lounge. "Is that you?" Her head popped through the doorway, a surprised expression painting her face.
"Yup," he closed the gap between them, wrapping her in a tight embrace. "How are you?"
"I am great," she gestured for him to sit down. "What brings you down this way- I was beginning to think we would never see you back here."
Seth settled down in his favourite arm chair. "I was planning to go into the town to get some groceries. Edward offered to drive, and then said that he'd drop me off here and then run the errands himself. He figured my time was better spent with my family."
"Well, remind me to thank him for that later," Sue said. "But now, tell me-how is everything going?"
"A lot better," Seth replied. "We've got some good leads on getting information about Nessie. Carlisle is planning a trip to meet some contacts in South America and he is feeling really positive about it. We've come across nothing this promising yet."
Sue nodded. It was still new to her to hear her son refer to the Cullen's with such familiarity and content. She understood that they were now an incredibly important part of his life, but it was going to be a great amount of time before she got used to having....that species....as family.
"But what about here?" Seth was asking. "Where's Leah?"
"Still asleep," Sue replied, somewhat absentmindedly, her mind still on the Cullen's.
"Don't tell me that the two of you are still at each other's throats," Seth groaned.
Sue shook her head, finally paying direct attention to her son. "No. We're not," she paused. "Too be honest, Leah seems almost happy at the moment."
Seth stared at his mother, dead pan. "Ha ha, mum. Very funny."
"I am not joking," Sue insisted. "And, I'm not saying that we have our old Leah back. It's just that she is relaxed, not so wound up. Have you said anything to her since our last conversation?"
"No. I haven't seen her...Leah happy?" Seth said and Sue nodded. "Are you sure that she hasn't started self-medicating?"
The guilty expression on Sue's face told him that she had in fact considered that, and had taken steps to prove it wrong. "No, she's not."
Seth let out a low whistle. "You are lucky she didn't catch you sneaking through her things," he said with a low chuckle. "But, we shouldn't be talking like this. We should just be happy that she is happy."
"I am happy, but I am going to be holding off a little longer before I start celebrating," Sue said, leaning back in her seat. "But fingers crossed that we will actually be able to."
XXXXX
Jacob wandered aimlessly down along the streets of Forks. He had no reason to be there except for escape. He had woken up that morning still confused as hell, and the reservation had started to make him feel claustrophobic.
Well, maybe not so much the reservation, as the proximity of a person within the reservation.
Here, in Forks, the faces were those of strangers. They saw him as only some abnormally tall man. Intimidated, people went out of their way to avoid him. There would be nobody asking him if he were ok. And there would be no running into Leah. He had too much to sort out before seeing her again. And he needed to do that alone.
"Jacob?"
Jacob stopped short, recognising the voice immediately. 'Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me.'
Edward chuckled, walking up closer to him. "It's nice to see you too."
"Well, if you heard that, then surely you heard the stuff about wanting to be alone," Jacob pointed out.
Edward gave a small shrug. "I might have, but I needed to speak to you about something."
"What are you even doing here?" Jacob asked, looking in the direction from where Edward had come. The supermarket. Not the place you would expect to see a bloodsucker.
"Now Jacob, call me that I will have no choice but to retaliate," Edward said, a small smirk on his face.
"You know what they say about eavesdropping," Jacob retorted. "So...you, supermarket. Care to explain?"
Edward held up the bag in his hand. "Seth doesn't really appreciate our diet. He was coming in today for supplies. I offered to do the shopping so he could stop in and see Sue and Leah."
At the mention of Leah's name, Jacob's mind flooded with all the thoughts he had been fighting to keep suppressed while around Edward. For a split second, everything took over- from his most intimate moments with her to his most recent confusion.
Jacob could see Edward's eyes widen slightly, and so he spoke quickly, attempting to distract them both. "You said that you wanted to speak with me about something?"
Thankfully, Edward caught the hint. "Yes. Alice called me about ten minutes ago. She'd just had a vision."
"What about?" Jacob asked, though he was fairly sure of the answer. Edward would only inform him of Alice's visions if it meant some form of danger.
"A coven of vampires are making their way to Forks. One seems to have an old connection with Carlisle and they are coming to see him. Like most, they are curious that he has managed to set up a permanent residence."
"Will they cause any trouble?" Jacob asked.
Edward shook his head. "At this point, Alice can see no trouble. Also, she saw their complete path from where they are to the house, which means they will not be crossing Quileute land. But, I thought that you would all appreciate knowing."
"Thanks," Jacob said. "Could you keep us posted as they get closer?"
"Of course," Edward said, glancing down at his watch. "I'm afraid that I have to go. The sun is going to be making an appearance this afternoon. I need to be back home by then." He turned, starting to walk away, but then stopped. "You should tell her."
Jacob's stomach clenched, knowing exactly what Edward was talking about. "It's not that easy. I don't even know what it is I should tell her."
Edward turned and looked at him directly. "You know exactly what. You just provided me with a lot of information, Jacob and what I know is that you are confusing yourself to avoid what you're feeling."
Jacob's brow furrowed. He was not enjoying getting this advice from Edward, of all people. "What would you know?" he muttered, childishly.
"I know that Leah cares for you as well."
"And how the fuck could you possibly know that, Cullen?" Jacob demanded. "Have you been standing outside her bedroom window reading her mind?"
Edward did not even flinch at Jacob's tone. "I just saw the way she looks at you, Jacob," he said calmly. "Open your eyes. You've been so blinded by your own confusion that you have failed to see what is right in front of you."
Jacob stood, rooted in the spot, watching as Edward turned and walked away. In a strange way he felt both lighter and burdened at the same time. Edward had offered him some revelations, but would he really be able to do something with them? Was he going to be strong enough to voice his thoughts to Leah?
XXXXX
"Jake," Billy called out from the kitchen early that evening. Jacob groaned. He had barely been home ten minutes and the last thing he needed was his father starting on him again.
"What?" he asked, walking into the kitchen.
Billy held out an empty casserole dish towards him. "Could you please take this back to the Clearwater's? I told Sue that I would get it back to her."
"Aww, dad, do I have too? Where's Rachel? Why can't she do it?" Jacob asked, his whiny tone masking the utter fear that he was experiencing at that moment. He wasn't ready yet- was he?
"Because I asked you to," Billy replied bluntly. "It'll take you five minutes. Now get over there."
Jacob huffed, turning on his heel and walking out. He had no choice- he had to be ready, like it or not.
XXXXX
"Oh, Jacob!" Sue gasped, placing a hand on the doorframe to steady herself. "You surprised me."
"Sorry Mrs C," Jacob replied. He had been standing on the Clearwater's porch, fist poised to knock when the front door had flown open. "Dad sent me around with this," he explained, holding up the casserole dish.
"Oh right," Sue glanced into the house. "I'm running late for a dinner, Jake- do you just want to take it in? Leave it on the kitchen bench. Thanks, that'll be great," she rambled off before stepping out the door and dashing towards her car.
After inhaling deeply and swallowing the lump forming in his throat, Jacob stepped into the house and headed towards the kitchen.
'Oh god, the kitchen,' he thought, remembering what had gone on last time he was in there. Instinctively, he quickened his pace, wanting to get in and get out as quickly as possible. Placing the dish on the kitchen bench, he turned to leave and smacked straight into Leah.
"Oomph..." she stumbled back slightly before looking up. "Jacob?"
"Uh, I was just bringing a dish..." he trailed off, running a hand through his hair. Leah's hair was wet. She had obviously recently gotten out of the shower and that thought was causing an influx of images in Jacob's mind.
"And you were going to leave without even saying good bye? You know," Leah said, raising an eyebrow, "if I actually gave a damn, I might feel a little hurt."
Jacob coughed. "Not if you gave a damn, Leah," he retorted. "More along the lines of if you were actually capable of feeling something." 'There,' he thought. 'You can do this. You can play. You can joke. You can do this.'
Leah laughed. "Touché," she said softly, running her fingers lightly up his chest. She stopped at his collarbone, fiddling with the collar on his t-shirt. "So, mum has gone out..."
Jacob felt his chest tighten at the sensation of her fingers on him. 'Nope...not a chance. Time to man up.' "Uh, Leah. I actually wanted to talk to you about something."
Leah snorted, rolling her eyes dramatically. "Are you serious? You actually want to talk?" He nodded and she tightened her grip on his collar. "My mother has gone out for a boozy dinner with girlfriends, which means she will not be coming home tonight. We have the place to ourselves, Jacob, which means the last thing I plan on doing is talking," she said, before crushing her lips into his. Inside she was smiling. She had been trying to find a way to keep herself occupied that evening when Jacob had just about fallen in her lap.
Jacob gave up all thoughts of resisting when Leah pushed her tongue thorough his lips, curling around his. 'After,' he promised himself. 'After...I will speak to her after.' He snaked his arms around Leah's body, pulling her closer to him. However, when she started tugging at the fly on his shorts, he pulled his lips from hers. "Not here," he murmured into her ear. "Upstairs, your room."
Leah groaned. "You are going to make me hold off for that long? That staircase is just too fucking big," she replied, hints of her usual sarcastic tone playing at the edges of her voice.
"There is no way that I am going to be able to be in the same vicinity as your mother if we defile her house again. Upstairs or nowhere."
"Fine." Leah grabbed him by the wrist and led him up the stairs. After closing the door to her room, she turned and started to push Jacob towards the bed.
Without a word, he grabbed her by her wrists, stopping her actions. He turned them around, so that he could be the one in control. He pushed Leah gently down onto the bed. He was going to do this right. No quick fuck this time. After the last time he knew he would not get through it.
He moved himself onto the bed, positioning himself between Leah's legs. He tugged gently at her shorts, and she lifted her hips to allow him to pull them down. He did so, taking her underwear with them at the same time and tossing them aside. He bent forward, pushing her singlet top up so that he could press his lips into her stomach. He swirled his tongue, as he moved down, feeling her skin break out in goose bumps at his touch.
Leah let out a moan as she felt Jacob's mouth press between her legs. She arched her hips up to meet his tongue as it flicked out against her clit. "Yes...Jake..." she let out a low moan as he continued to lap at her. She reached down, grabbing hold of his hair. "Don't...stop."
And he didn't. All Leah could hear was the sound of her own erratic breaths as he continued to caress her with his tongue. She let out a gasp as Jacob pushed a finger inside of her, and she felt a delicious tightening in the pit of her stomach. "Fuck, yes," she hissed, as Jacob removed his finger, and then pushed two in.
Leah started to buck her hips slightly, wanting to increase the combined friction of his tongue and fingers. "Jake....Jake...." her voice was barely a whisper as the sensation in her stomach started to spread to every inch of her body. All that mattered was his hot mouth and the pressure of his fingers. "Uh...Jake....yes....please....uh...." Leah let out a cry as her building orgasm finally released. "Jake....Jake....Jake...."
Jacob continued until she fell silent, breathing heavily. He extracted his fingers, and slowly began moving up her body, tracing all of her contours with his lips. He wanted to savour this. He had no idea how things were going to pan out once he opened his big fat trap.
He paused at her collarbone, sweeping his tongue out to taste her sweet skin. "Jake," she murmured, reaching for the waistband of his shorts. Jacob could sense her urgency, as she fumbled with the buttons. He pulled her hand away, undoing the shorts himself. He wanted to control this, the pace. He was not just going to mindlessly fuck her.
He released his hard cock, which had been throbbing ever since Leah had pressed her lips into his outside the kitchen. Suctioning his lips against her neck, he felt Leah's hips arch up, waiting to meet him. He waited a few more seconds before slipping inside of her.
He groaned at the feeling of her around him. He started to move inside her, keeping it slower than normal. He kept his lips pressed to some part of her skin at all times, and his hands did the best job they could at caressing everywhere else.
Leah was allowing herself to be consumed by him. It was as if his lips and hands where everywhere. But a small part of her was feeling somewhat confused. This felt so different to the way things usually were between the two of them. She couldn't, for the life of her, figure out why. But then, arching her hips to meet his motions, she really couldn't give a shit. Slow or fast, she could seriously imagine spending the rest of her life doing this.
Rest of her life? Leah's eyes flew open at that thought, as Jacob began moaning against her neck. She pushed the thought aside. The things people consider in the middle of a fuck.
"Leah...uh..." He was close. Leah brought her hands down his ass, pressing down to grind their bodies closer to together. "Oh...ugh....fuck!" He groaned loudly, the sensation vibrating her skin, as he came, his body tesne and trembling. "Leah..."
He lay slacken, against her body for several moments, before slipping out of her and rolling over. He stayed there, flat on his back, a hand thrown over his eyes. Leah propped herself up on an elbow, watching him.
"Getting comfy there, Black?"
Jacob suddenly sat bolt upright. He twisted, so that his feet were resting in the floor, manoeuvring himself that he could pull up his shorts. "Leah."
"Yeah?" She sat up, covering herself with her blanket.
"Gotta talk to you about something," he muttered.
Leah let out a small laugh. "Oh god, you really were serious about that? What is so important?"
"I...ummm...." He shifted his body so that he could face her, running a hand through his hair.
"Spit it out, Jake."
"Ok, fine...." Jacob inhaled deeply. It was now or never."Look, I know that we agreed that this was never going to be anything more than 'helping' each other..."
Leah's stomach churned. The difference, the difference in Jacob. Her cogs in her mind, which was now clear enough to function, started turning. No, no, no, no.... " Jake, don't," she said quietly.
"No, I have to say this. I don't know exactly what I feel, but what I do know is that this—" he gestured between the two of them, "is becoming more for me. I want more. I want you. I want to spend time with you. I want to really be with you, and not just pretend to be."
Leah sat there, staring at him for what felt like an eternity. He couldn't read her expression and he just hoped that it was only surprise that she was processing.
"Get out," she whispered.
Jacob couldn't be sure if he had heard her correctly. "What?"
"I said get out!" she replied, her voice considerably louder. "Why would you do this?"
"Do what?" Jacob was confused. "I don't—"
"Why would you want to ruin everything?" Leah yelled, her expression furious. "We had a good thing going, Jacob. It was working and you just had to go and fuck everything up, didn't you? Why would you do that?"
Jacob stood up from the bed, shocked at the vehemence of her response. "Leah, I didn't want to lie—"
"Get out!" she shrieked. "Get out of my house and don't fucking come near me again!"
As Jacob stumbled out of the room, Leah fell back into her pillows, hot tears pricking her eyes. She has sworn that she would not allow herself to become vulnerable and she had just let him make her feel that way. Burying her face into a pillow she screamed. Again and again, until her throat was aching.
Why did he have to ruin everything?
