A/N: Sorry this took a while. Hermione's doing some not-very-Hermione things in this chappie, and I wanted it to sound plausible. And since I've been neglecting the quotes I have dropped a couple in.

As always, enjoy, and please shoot me a review.

Hermione awoke a few days later to find Sirius was gone, again. She was used to it by now, he left early in the morning and returned either bearing lunch or ready to head out in search of nourishment at about half past noon. He was still steadfastly refusing to tell her anything about what was going on, only that 'you'll find out soon enough'. She wasn't worried about it, he certainly was attentive enough when he returned, and didn't complain when she ventured out to shop by herself.

It was on her latest trip out that she had picked herself up a new laptop. Since it was raining lightly outside the hot tub was out of the question she was lounging across the couch, laptop connected to the internet, searching for something very specific. She had been researching for about two hours and it was getting close to when Sirius would return. She had to make a choice now.

"See you at four-thirty," she smiled into the phone as Sirius walked into the room. "Goodbye."

"Your other boyfriend?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

She smiled at him, closing the laptop before he had a chance to see the screen. "Not quite. Just setting up an appointment."

"Male prostitute?"

She threw a pillow at him, and they laughed for a moment together. Sirius busied himself setting out lunch and didn't press the issue further, at least until they sat down.

"Spa afternoon?" he asked as she twisted some pasta around her fork.

"No," she answered, offering no other explanation.

"What are you up to?" he asked curiously.

"I'm not telling you, you'll try to talk me out of it."

He dropped his fork. "That bad?"

"Something I've been thinking about doing for a little while," she smiled at him.

"You're not going to tell me, are you?" he sighed, looking at his food.

"Now I have one of those secrets, kind of like you."

"Is it something that needs done by yourself, or do you mind if I tag along?"

"You can come," she smiled, taking his hand. "Did you have fun this morning?"

"Loads," he gave his usual answer. "I'm going to be done at the end of the week. Then you'll get to figure out what I've been up to."

She looked excited, but didn't feel the need to press her luck. She could wait until the end of the week to figure out what Sirius was up to.

Suddenly his lips were on hers in a passionate kiss. His hands held her firmly to him, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed herself into the unexpected affection. They kissed for several moments, then before she knew it Sirius was back in his seat, a bite of food halfway to his mouth.

"What was that for?" she asked, biting her lip and smoothing her hair.

He shrugged and smiled at her. "You just look so damn cute when you're excited about something."

She blushed, prompting another round of kissing because she looked cute while embarrassed. They managed to make it through the rest of the meal without anymore make-out interruptions, but they had a few close calls when Hermione managed to drop pasta sauce on her blouse and looked as if she wanted to crawl into the wall.

They played video games until quarter until four, when Hermione went into her room to change quickly. She emerged wearing a large zippered hoodie and announced it was time to go. She led them through streets as if she knew where she was going, and eventually they came to a halt in front of a tattoo parlor.

"You're joking!" Sirius said as she bravely opened the door.

"Obviously not," Hermione said, walking inside.

Sirius hurried after her as a woman with blue hair, tattoos covering her arms, and a lip ring greeted Hermione warmly.

"Your boy?" the woman asked, eying Sirius.

"Yes," Hermione said, looking back at him with a smile.

"Who did your art?" the woman asked, pointing to his tattoos showing through the unbuttoned top of his shirt.

"I did them myself," Sirius muttered.

"Wow," the woman said, sounding impressed.

"Bloody Azkaban," Sirius murmured as the woman led them back to a private stall.

"So you're sure about what you saw online?" she asked Hermione, showing her everything she had ready.

"Yes," Hermione said, shedding her hoodie and hanging it up on a hook by the door. Underneath she was wearing a halter top.

"A phoenix rising from the flames. I loved this one," the woman smiled at her and started getting things ready.

"I thought it was in order," Hermione winked at Sirius.

"Are you sure about this?" Sirius said as Hermione sat on the chair backwards.

"Yes, I am," Hermione said, motioning for him to sit on a stool facing her. He took his place, still looking at her skeptically. "Now hold my hands so I don't sissy out."

He chuckled and took her hands as the woman placed the transfer onto her shoulder.

"I can't believe you're doing this. And a phoenix of all things."

"Well it's not like everything else I've been doing would fit on my back, and would you want Harry and Ron's mugs on your shoulder?"

Sirius made a face, but returned to smiling at her. "I never thought you would have gotten a tattoo, 'Mione. You seem so straight-laced."

"Everyone assumes that because of what I was like at Hogwarts. If I didn't have a bit of a streak in me do you think I ever would have been friends with Harry and Ron as long as I have been?"

"Touché."

"Are you ready?" the woman asked.

Hermione took a deep breath and nodded. She winced as the needle touched her skin.

"Deep breaths, love," Sirius kissed her forehead in support. "If you stop now you're going to have an ugly blob."

"How did you do this to yourself?" Hermione grimaced.

"It's easier when you're using physical pain to detract from emotional," Sirius murmured.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, rubbing his hand.

"But we're focusing on Hermione Granger's newest insane idea. And this one wasn't even supplied by anyone with the last name of 'Weasley'."

"George was talking about getting a tattoo of Fred," Hermione liked talking. It was distracting herself from her instinct to wince away from the pain in her shoulder.

"That wouldn't seem narcissistic at all," Sirius rolled her eyes. "Anyone who doesn't know he had a twin would think he got a tattoo of himself."

"He thinks that would be funny."

"Leave it to George to find something like that bloody entertaining. Though I can't talk badly of him. He and Fred took the work James and I left and brought it up to the next level."

"Harry ever tell you about how they got rid of Umbridge?"

"Yes," Sirius laughed. "And I tip my hat forever to them for that. That woman was... I'm not going to say it in mixed company."

"Like I've never heard you say any bad words, Sirius Black."

"My mother would have my neck if she found out I was swearing around women," Sirius looked falsely horrified.

Hermione chuckled, making careful to move her shoulder as little as possible. "I'd think if your mother found out you were dating me the last thing you would have to worry about is your language around me."

"Right now she'd probably kiss your ass because you're famous and important. But as soon as you're even a millimeter out of the spotlight she'd be back to calling you all sorts of colorful names."

"Hence why it'd be hilarious if she chewed you out for using bad language."

"Aw, you love my mother."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "She'd be great for a laugh."

Sirius looked shocked.

"I'm serious. If you just let her loose on someone walking by with a hangover I bet it'd be a million laughs."

Sirius chuckled. "Too bad most of the time the person walking by with a hangover would be me."

"Well, I'll just have to try it sometime," Hermione smirked at him.

He studied her face. "Have you given any thought to going to find your parents?"

"I was going to start looking them up on the internet tomorrow," Hermione muttered. "Would you like to come with me?"

"Do you think it best to pile so much onto your parents at once?"

"It's a lot, but maybe it's one of those band-aid things. It's better to deal with it all at once."

"Oh, yeah. Lumping 'I'm alive and here's all my adventures that almost killed me in the last year' with 'here's my ex-con boyfriend' is certain to make your parents happy."

Hermione smirked.

"What?" Sirius looked surprised.

"You're nervous about meeting my parents," she said matter-of-factly.

"I am not!" he protested weakly.

"You are," she smiled. "Sirius Black, afraid to meet a girl's parents."

"Bloody hell, Hermione," he muttered. "I'm probably not exactly a parent's dream."

"But you are," Hermione gave him a quick peck on the lips. "Once you get past the exterior."

"And the age thing," he grumbled.

"Lots of young girls fall for older men."

"Not all the older men spent twelve years in Azkaban," he pointed out.

"Wrongfully convicted without trial. I told them about that already, they were outraged. They were hoping there was a way you'd be compensated for years in that horrible place and on the run."

"I don't want them to approve of me out of pity," he sighed.

"They won't. They'll judge you like every other guy I've brought home."

"How many have there been?" he raised an eyebrow.

"Viktor. He swung by for a visit when he was in the country playing Quidditch once. They got the impression he thought we were more than what we were, and told me I needed to let him down gently."

"Did you?"

She blushed. "Not really. I never really let him down. I think he got the idea after we only corresponded by owl for a while. Last I heard he was dating a girl on the Harpies."

"So have you ever had a real boyfriend?" Sirius smiled.

"Have you ever had a real girlfriend?" she shot back, annoyed.

"Seven. You?" he answered, amused.

"Just Viktor. If you can count that," she muttered.

He looked at her, but said nothing.

"I know what you're wondering. You first."

"Nine. Six of the seven and three one-night stands."

"One," she muttered, looking down.

"Viktor?" he asked, looking as if he were doing the math in his head.

She shook her head enthusiastically.

"Ron," he said with complete certainty in his voice.

She shook her head slowly.

"Complete stranger?" he asked in surprise.

"The problem with sleeping with strangers is... they're strange," she muttered.

"I give up," he leaned forward in anticipation.

"Harry," she whispered back, almost inaudibly.

He started coughing violently, as if choking on air. She turned bright red.

"I shouldn't have said anything," she muttered angrily.

"It's OK," he said, looking as if he were suppressing a smile. "You're a grown woman, you're allowed to make grown woman decisions."

"That's not going to weird you out?" she looked into his eyes.

"It was a shock, but no, it's not weird," he assured her, running his hands through her hair before leaning forward to kiss her. "How are you holding up, love?" he asked, craning his neck to see how her tattoo was going.

"It hurts, but it's not the worst I've felt."

He growled, knowing he was talking about his least favorite cousin.

"Does it look okay?" she asked.

He stood long enough to take a good look at the phoenix. "It looks great, and it's almost over."

"Thank goodness. I have to pee like you wouldn't believe."

He smirked and leaned forward to tickle her.

"Better be careful," she hissed before his fingers had a chance to touch her. "I have a full bladder and I'm not afraid to use it."

His laughter filled the shop.