A/N: Thank you guys for reading, reviewing, alerting and favouring this story. You made my week. So here is chapter 2, I hope you enjoy. I apologize for all spelling and gramma errors. ENJOY!
Title: Room 920
Rating: M
Genre: Romance/Drama
Chapter: 2 of 5
Pairing: Mark/Lexie
Summary: Every year on this day, Lexie finds herself at the Archfield Hotel in room 920. The room where she fell unconditionally and irrevocably in love. For the last three years she's been there by herself, but not this year she has company.(Set after episode 8x21). OOC, A/U
Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy and its characters.
Lexie stopped dead in her tracks when she saw who it was. The intruder also stood there frozen, his expression matched Lexie's.
The two of them had the same thoughts going through their minds. Is she/he really here?, How is that even possible?, What is she/he doing here?, Am I hallucinating?, How could she/he have known was her or would be here?.
"Mark! What are you doing here and how did you get in here?" Lexie questioned as she tried to understand what was going on. She closed her eyes willing herself to wake up, maybe she was dreaming. What were the chances of Mark showing up at the Archfield and being in the same room as her.
Mark was too shocked to comprehend what was going on. Had he been thinking about her so much that now she magically appeared in his hotel room. He shook his head trying to clear his thoughts and willing Lexies' hallucination to go away.
"Mark...Mark can you hear me?".
"What...what...what are you doing here Lexie?" he asked when he manged to put a sentence together.
"I asked you first and you didn't answer me. How did you get in here" Lexie asked starting to get a little peeved by Mark's lack of response. Had he followed her here?, Did someone tell him she was here?, If so who would have?. Lexie had a long-standing agreement with the hotel manager and she knew he wouldn't say anything or would have told anyone.
Mark could see the tell-tell signs of her getting irritated. He smirked internally at how much he knew her body language. "I just checked in, that's how I got a key this room. Now that I have answered your questions, are you going to tell me what it is you are doing here? And why are you dressed in my t-shirt?".
Lexie looked down at her dressing and felt her blush spread across her face from the embarrassment. Her state of dress or undress made her feel self-conscious. She started pulling down on the t-shirt trying to cover her bare legs, but it didn't work. Mark kept staring at her as she went through her antics of trying to cover-up. If the situation wasn't somewhat serious he would have laughed at her cuteness.
"So...?" Mark said arching one of his eye-brows, encouraging her to answer him.
"Uhmm...uhmm...uhmm" Lexie stuttered as she tried to come up with a good excuse that wouldn't make her look pathetic in Mark's eyes.
"Cat got your tongue? huh" Mark teased.
Lexie realized Mark was enjoying her discomfort way too much, she decided she should just be honest with him seeing that he had already seen her in his clothes and was in his old hotel room.
"Well, I come here every year to the date. It's the day you first made love to me and not just had sex. And the reason am in your t-shirt is because it's the next best thing to you that I can have" she spoke in a very low and soft voice, looking at her feet. She was scared and ashamed to look at Mark, not knowing how he would react to her confession. But it felt good just to say it out loud.
Mark did not expect Lexie's response. The somewhat silly mood that was in the room shifted. Lexie's confession seem to bring him back to the reality of why he was there in the first place. He didn't know what to make of Lexie's words, they couldn't be true. Mark's mind went into over drive, could it be possible that she felt the same way as he did? Was she there because she missed him and them as a couple? Did she really come here every year?. With all these thoughts and questions running a murk in his mind, Mark suddenly felt the weight that he had carried around with him for a very long time weigh even heavier on his shoulders.
He took of his leather jacket and sighed heavily as he sat himself on the couch. Lexie could see the wheels in his mind turning, she couldn't help but wonder what exactly was going in his life. He looked so lost and exhausted. Lexie's first thoughts were maybe something happened at work or something was wrong with Sophia. Mark had always been a confident person especially when it came to his work. He always exuded power, confidence, charisma and success. But the man before her was lost and tired plain and simple.
Knowing that he wasn't going anywhere any time soon, Lexie moved to the mini bar and poured them a drink. She went to the couch where Mark was and handed him the glass of single malt whiskey, then sat next him. She pulled her legs to her chest and pulled the throw that draped on the couch to cover her exposed legs.
They sat in companionable silence for what seem like a long time. Lexie knew something was going on and she wasn't going to ask what it was, she would let him open up to her, if he wanted her to know.
After a few sips of his whiskey Mark broke the silence "I have made a mess of things Lex, and I don't know how to fix any of it now" he confessed.
"I know what you mean Mark" she responded. Knowing exactly what how he felt.
Mark looked at her intently trying to see if she really knew how he felt.
"Do you Lex?"and she only nodded in agreement.
"I thought I could do it you know. I thought I could have it all. Be a surgeon, a father, a best friend and a lover. Before I came here from New York I had resigned myself to being a bachelor. I tried to have a relationship with Addison and that didn't work out too well as you already know. So the idea of ever being with one person and having a family was just a pipe dream to me. I managed to do the bachelor thing until YOU came to Seattle Grace. Lexie you made me want things, you made me want a relationship, be a stable and faithful partner. You made me see myself as a caregiver to you and our children.
And then Sloane happened. I was doing well then, but I didn't stop to think of what exactly I was doing. I didn't look at the whole picture and the distant future. I was like a horse with blinders on, all I could see and think about was the immediate future. I was selfish, I didn't even stop to think about what Sloane's presence meant to our relationship and you. Am sorry I took you for granted Lexie and I'll always regret my actions. Sloane didn't need a father she was eighteen. She had spent eighteen years of her life without a father and then suddenly I wanted to be that to her. There wasn't anything else that I could teach her that she hadn't taught herself. What she needed was someone to support her financially since her mother threw her out.
I think she knew that, she was going to give the baby up for adoption before she even came here. The whole time she was here I know she was messing with me, and I was a fool to fall for her ploy. I spoke to Samantha a week after Sloane went back to New York after giving up the baby. What she told me Lexie still haunts me to this day".
Mark looked at Lexie and so the unspoken question in her eyes. "Do you want to know?" he asked not wanting to assume anything. His assumptions had messed things up between them before and he had learnt his lesson very well.
"Yes" Lexie agreed in a small and timid voice. She wasn't sure she wanted to hear what was said, but she felt she owed it to herself to know. Just in case, a girl can dream right.
"She basically said what Addison had said to me, about not being a good father.
Samantha said ' regardless of how much you try in this life, you will never be a father any child deserves. You abandoned me when I told you I was pregnant and left me with $ 250.00 to take care of it. Well I have news for you Mark. Sloane is all grown up and now you want to play daddy, she's all grown up and the lessons and things that you were supposed to teach her as her father she already learnt that on her own. No amount of money and dedication that you want to give her now will ever make up for her childhood and your abandonment'.
I don't mean to offend you Lex, but my actions were no better than Thatchers'. In terms of his relationship with Meredith.
Her words still ring loud in my ears every single day. That is why when Callie told me she was pregnant, I jump at the bat. In a weird way I want to prove Addison and Samantha wrong, I wanted to prove to everyone that I could do it and still come out on top. And once again I took you and our relationship for granted.
I am truly sorry for all the hurt and pain I have caused you Lexie. It was never my intention to do so but I did. That night when you left my apartment I should have come after you and forced you to talk to me, but I didn't. Instead I took the cowards way out, and sent Avery to talk to you and I lost you.
I have a thousand and one regrets Lexie, but my biggest one is loosing you because of my selfishness and pride. I regret that I never fought for Lexie, you are someone who deserve to be fought for and I never did that both times.
I shouldn't have done a lot of thing like having sex with Callie, regardless of what we were both going through. I should have told her no and encouraged her to deal with her pain differently. I know it means had I not slept with her Sophia wouldn't be here. I love my daughter Lexie I really do, but I hate the way she was conceived. She wasn't conceived out of love, but instead she was conceived out of pain, hurt and confusion. It's not her existence that I regret it's just the conception.
After the Sloane debacle, I made a promise to myself that if I was to ever father a child, that child would from love and not convenience. I promised that I would father a child with no one but you Lexie and I broke my promise.
When I saw you move on with Avery, it broke my heart. I wont lie that I was okay with it, but you looked so happy Lexie. You hadn't looked that happy in a long time and it broke my heart that I wasn't the one making you smile anymore. I have always wanted you to be happy Lexie and if being with Avery did that I was willing to let go and love you from afar. That is why that night I told you I was letting you go and told you to walk away. It was hard seeing you walk out of my life Lex.
I didn't want to date anymore or be in a relationship with anyone for that matter, but Callie kept pushing and you know how bossy and controlling she can get. So to get her of my case I agree to go a blind date with Julia. She wasn't bad company at all and I was honest with her from the beginning that I wasn't looking for a relationship. We agreed to being friends and I don't know when along the way the we became more than that. Callie and Arizona kept pushing and eventually I gave in. everyone around me looked happy and had someone but, I was all alone. I will be honest with you and say I gave in because I was lonely.
I was never a one to please the people around me but that's what I have become. Everything I have done in the last five years was please someone. If it's not Derek, then its Addison or Callie or Arizona or Julia. This is not who I am Lexie nor is it who I want to be. I want to be able to live my life that way I want to. The way I have always dreamed I would.
I am not happy Lexie, I have become a robot. It's like am programmed to know when to smile, laugh, joke, be sad, give an opinion. A few weeks ago Callie came to me and said that maybe its time I took things to the next level with Julia since we have been together for almost eight months now. I actually contemplated the idea of asking her to move in with me. I even spoke to Derek about it" Mark chuckled darkly at that. Throughout Mark's confession Lexie didn't say anything, she just sat there and listened.
"And then a few days ago Julia said she wanted to have a child with me. Do I love Julia? No, Do I care about her? Yes. Do I care enough to want to have a child with her? No. Am I even ready for another child? Maybe with the right person". As Mark continued to talk Lexie realized that he wasn't talking to her anymore, he was actually musing about his thoughts aloud.
She just sat there and let him continue his musing. Lexie realized that this was Mark's way of dealing with the mess that was his life. He had come here to figure things out and it so happened that she was coincidentally there too. But she couldn't help but feel that maybe this was a sign to both of them.
Mark stopped talking after a while, he felt good after saying his thoughts out loud. It was as if a huge weight had been lifted of his shoulders and he couldn't help but wonder whether it was because Lexie was there to listen or just that he had someone to talk too.
Thinking of Lexie, Mark began to wonder why she came back to this room year after year like she had said.
"Why?" he queried.
His question caught her off guard and confused her. Had she missed something while she was lost in her own thoughts.
"Why, what?" she inquired.
"Why do you come here every year like you said?" Mark clarified.
A/N: Thank you for reading, let me know what you think so far. Please Review!
