A/N: Sorry for the long wait, life has been pretty hectic at the moment! I'm really sorry! Forgive me? I give you free cake?
Thanks again for all the support and reviews, it means the world to me! So I'll stop rambling now and let you read, and don't forget to pleaseee review :D
Disclaimer: Amy: Are you all Mrs Grumpy Face Today?
Me: Yes
Amy: Why?
Doctor: Because she owns nothing.
Amy: Oh. Sucks to be you.
The Doctor comes to and genuinely feels like fainting again at the mere thought of bumbling Rory driving his TARDIS but he doesn't and he must look into why he always does things when he doesn't want to but can never do them when he does. For it is a very annoying habit of his, he has decided.
He just lays there and hopes, yet highly doubts, that Amy and Rory have just left him there to slowly rot and gone off to do humanly stuff. But then he remembers that he is a humanly human type now and he feels faint.
Again.
Out comes the imaginary notepad again, and he writes down to get himself to a doctor or nurse or any medical type person really, except for that giraffe surgeon who nearly ate his brain. But he really doesn't want to think about that right now. Because really, what normal person/alien/alien-turned-person should feel faint five times in the space of 5 minutes?
He also remembers, whist he's laying there probably looking like a corpse but sincerely hoping he doesn't because…ew, that he is married to Amy Pond. Amazing, gorgeous, witty Amy Pond. He has some quite colourful and all together very very not good thoughts of what he may have done with Amy Pond but he pushes them aside quickly because he is a 907 year old humalien, he reminds himself.
And then he laughs for he really is damn funny sometimes, he decides, and decides to add humalien to the Oxford Dictionary when he has the time. Which would be never, he realises. But him, being the stubborn fool that he is, doesn't care.
Out comes the hypothetical notepad…
"Doctor?" he hears a very not familiar, unless he has more amnesia which, knowing him, is extremely likely, voice ask.
"Sacred Bob?" he prays. "I uh, know we may have had our differences earlier but really I love you dearly and please make me safe and uh please do not make Amy punch me. Thanks."
The Doctor squints open an eye, for he is a coward, and near has an aneurism for he is most definitely not in the TARDIS anymore and he most definitely is not with Amy or crazy wannabe Rory for he is in a dark room and he is with an old man , who on second thoughts, he is really glad is not Amy because…ew.
And he most defiantly, one hundred percent, under no circumstances whatsoever was absolutely scared out of his mind.
He remembers that he had decided he was a terrible liar. It appears that that still stands. For he is absolutely petrified. Which is not a rare occurrence for him.
"I swear to God, Scared Bob what even are you?" he cries. "You suck bum cheek."
Oh he is never ever saying that again. He's blushing and he damn well knows it, but he chooses to ignore this because Amy isn't here to laugh at him for it's only creepy, old possible crazy psycho killer, guy. He puts it on the "Things a Timelord Should Never Say In Their Existence If They Would Rather Not Live A Long, Lonely, Miserable Life. Part II." list. He is rather ashamed, even though he's not really because secretly he views it as an accomplishment but he must keep face, that he has nearly said all of these things. And look at him he's married! He must write to the author and share this information with them for he is a pretentious git, he decides.
"DOCTOR!" he is pulled from his thoughts once again by the sound of an angry voice, not rare for him to be on the receiving end of.
"Where am I?" he asks. Yes that sounds acceptable. He hopes there isn't a waver in his voice but he knows there probably is for he's terrified, but he hopes he pulls if off because he's fly like that.
He thinks.
"Don't you even recognize your own home?" the man asks, gesturing to the dark room.
The Doctor wonders if this is a rhetorical question and also if he has gone blind, which he highly doubts but also lists as quite a possibility for him, for he can't see anything except blackness and the outline of the man.
"Is this some kind of joke?" the Doctor asks. He rather very hopes not because jokes are no fun unless he's the one making them. He has learnt this over the years and never wishes to experience it again. But then Amy Pond comes along with her red hair and long legs and amazing smile and it feels like the jokes always on him, laughing at his idiocy and his alien-ness and his loneliness.
"Ah I see. Lights!" the man calls and with a click of his fingers the lights come on.
"Oh My Gallifrey you have to show me how-" the Doctor sounds like a two year old, he realises. He is cut short at the sight of the room he is in. It's the TARDIS control room. He doesn't know how he couldn't have recognized this what with the connection and all, but then he reminds himself that he is human now for Bob' sake and that he is a clueless chump.
"It's the TARDIS." he repeats aloud for it is most defiantly worth repeating. "But where are Amy and, and Rory?" he feels panic rise in him now.
O my Bob he's been out cold for hours and an evil psycho mastermind has come onto his beloved and kidnapped and murdered Amy and Rory and is now keeping him captive because Rory went traitor for he's a jealous ass and told evil mastermind that he owned the ship and now he's going to torture him to death. Which can happen because he's HUMAN NOW!
Gosh. He really must calm down for he really does have an over-active imagination, he tries to tell himself but secretly is still 110% sure that that is what happened because he loves an adventure. Because he is a stupid fool, he reminds himself.
"I have connections with Sacred Bob!" he roars, and he wonders why he is so stupid sometimes because, really, as if that's going to help him. At least Amy didn't witness that, he muses.
"Well that's all very good now but we have more important matters to discuss." the man says, icily.
"Look I'm sorry! Ok? I don't know what I did to you but it was likely something by mistake that I couldn't control for that sounds like something I'd do but I didn't do it on purpose! It's so hard being the only Timelord left, well ex-Timelord now I suppose, which when I come to think about it is not very good at all. I mean I probably had good intentions but a freak psychic schism probably ate it up. Just please don't kill me!" he screams inside his head.
Aloud however he says "Oh yeah? Like what?" because he is a proud, as well as pretentious, git.
"Like this." he says and turns around and the Doctor feels faint yet again, he really must get that looked at, he decides, because he recognizes that face.
Of course he recognizes that face. Because no matter how many times he might change so that even the ones he cares about most in the world don't even recognize him, he must always look at the face in the mirror and hate it for all that it has does and all the pain it has caused and for the things it can't do. All it can't save.
"You!" he cries, eyes wide, an accusing finger pointed at the man. Because that's really going to win a death battle.
"Me? Or you?" he asks with a smirk. "Or us? Oh it's so confusing isn't it? That's why we decided on a name last time isn't Doctor? "
"Dreamlord." he spits out. "What have you done to me? Where's Amy?" he feels like there should be someone else he is worried about too but right now, he doesn't care. It's only her.
"Don't worry, the redhead's safe. Good catch by the way." he winks and the Doctor feels like punching him but refrains because it is highly likely that he will break his hand and he quite likes the usage of his hand.
"What so you saw my dreams and put me in them? Put me in my dream world right?" he asks, scathing. He knew it was too good to be true. He knows he has to go throw himself into a black hole or something and wake up when everything is back to normal. He knows he has to do it. Doesn't mean he wants to for he has dreamed about this. About being with Amy.
"Guess again. Your close though. " the Dreamlord teases.
"Look I don't have time for your stupid little games! How are you even here? I blew the pollen away! I- I.." he trails off, lost for words, a very rare occurrence for him.
"You don't have time? Don't make me laugh! Oh but wait that's right…you're human now. How's that working out for you? " he laughs at The Doctor and relishes in this torture.
"How am I here? Easy. I'm you. You know that, I know that. Everybody's happy. I'm that dark part of you. The part that's been buried here for over 900 years, that just kept getting bigger with every mistake and every loss and every girl to walk through those doors and never return. And well, it does get a little boring down there all by my lonesome. So…" he smirks devilishly "I thought I'd come out and play."
The Doctor can't take this. He knows that it's true, what he's saying and it's tearing him apart. He has to get out. He has to get out quickly, he knows this. He may be an imbecile sometimes, well most times, but on rare occasions he is actually not a complete failure and luckily right now is one of them times.
He hopes.
"It was lovely talking to you and all, alter-ego, but I'm afraid I have to go throw myself into a supernova now. Hopefully I'll see you again soon. Not." he says with a cool voice that he hopes isn't wavering because so help him God if it is he will personally go find Scared Bob and shoot him.
"You'll die." he says, as simply as if he was stating the weather.
"What?" The Doctor asks, exasperated.
"You know. Die." he disappears with a pop and returns one second later with a plastic knife hair band on his head.
"Dead." he says slowly as if talking to a two year old, which really is like him, The Doctor supposes.
"No I won't. You said so yourself. You die in the dream and wake up in reality. Done." he says and makes his way over to the door.
"Undone." The Dreamlord calls. "I forgot to mention to you last time. I can change reality."
The Doctor laughs, a humourless laugh. Which is unlikely for him and very not good indeed. "Sure you can."
"Ok then, don't believe me. Just throw yourself into a supernova. IN REALITY! You'll die, of course you'll die because this isn't a dream stupid! This is your reality now. Well I say this. This is me coming to you in a dream because you fainted, you wuss, but your actions in this dream happen in your reality too. So by all means throw yourself into a firebomb. You're human now, you'll die straight away. You'll leave behind your TARDIS, your dream life…Amy."
The Doctor is frozen on the spot. He doesn't really know what to believe. Was it worth the risk? He damn well knows he doesn't want to leave Amy behind with Rory the freaking Timelord because she seems to have soft spots for crazy people.
"How do I know your not lying to me?" he decides is a reasonable question to ask.
The Dreamlord chooses to ignore this and instead says "You're probably wondering about the Rory part. I say probably Ha. I know you are. Rory was never part of your fantasy because yes Doctor I do know your dreams. I see them every night. Those horrible, heartbreaking dreams of yours. Haha. All that pain, all those you couldn't save haunting you in your dreams every night. Crying for help. You can't do anything. You can never do anything. And still you dream of the ones who can't be saved. You Can't save everyone Doctor! " he pauses to let this sink in and he is a cruel man, the Doctor decides for he is rubbing salt in his already bitter wounds.
"And you dream too of all the loss in your life. Of all the times when you've gotten close to someone and they've walked away. Because they always walk away don't they Doctor? Why would they stay with you? An old alien who stole a magic box and hinders more than helps? Why would they waste their lives with a man who doesn't age, a man who can't love even with two hearts? I know you dream of them all. Every single one. A certain blonde in particular." The Dreamlord is enjoying this, the Doctor knows he is.
"But among all the black and all the misery there is a brightness, a light illuminating the black and blocking it out. And this dream, this light, is recurring, and it's of the beautiful Miss Pond. Isn't Doctor? Your beautiful Amy eh? Your married to her. You have 2 little ginger babies running around the TARDIS because somehow, in your little dream you can still fly it even though you're human! And of course you're human because how else would you be with her? Have your precious little kids, kiss her, get old and grey with her by your side? Yes I know your dreams Doctor. But we both know that if you're human you can't fly the TARDIS and take her to all the amazing places. So that's where old beaky comes in. He's just an extra pawn in the piece. Believe me now Doctor?"
The Doctor feels faint for the millionth time that day. All of it, everything he said, is so true that it hurts. He dreams of that , that life with Amy. Being able to grow old my her side and lover her and have grandchildren. And he knows it can never happen so he puts on a brave face and smiles at Amy and Rory. Rory who can grow old and grey and provide Amy with a family. Oh it hurts, how it hurts. Bob had better be beaming him down some guidance right about now, he thinks.
"So by all means, go blow your brains out, and leave all you ever dreamed behind." he finishes with a triumphant grin.
"It's not real though. She doesn't really love me. It's just messing with her mind!" the Doctor realises but really wishes he hadn't because now he's even more depressed.
"Doctor I can see her dreams too stupid. She wants this. She does love you."
"How do I know you're telling me the truth? That you changed reality?" he asks, bewildered.
"You don't." the Dreamlord shrugs. "But this right here is reality so if you kill yourself you're dead. Got it?"
"But how do I know?" he cries for really why does his life have to be so confusing and complicated?
The Dreamlord sighs and rolls his eyes. "Like this." he winks and the next thing the Doctor knows he's being punched in the nose and it hurts quite a very measurable amount.
And then he passes out.
The Doctor comes to with a gasp and a throbbing in his nose.
"Ow!" he yells and he sees crimson in his eyes and he think they are going to burn because it itches so much.
"Doctor!" he hears Amy cry and then arms are encircling him and holding him so tight that he actually can't breathe.
"Don't scare my like again buster!" she scowls and slaps him across the head. She is a devil, he decides for he has just fainted, been punched in the nose and passed out and then she goes and slaps him. Which, on second thoughts, sounds like a normal day for him.
"You're bleeding. Why is he bleeding?" Rory asks and points to the blood pouring out of the Doctor's nose.
"I dunno." Amy frowns. "He landed on his back"
"Definitely reality then." the Doctor mutters. He is still searing form the awful words and truths the Dreamlord said to him and they still are tearing away at him bit by bit, more and more every day. But he has put up with it this long so damn him if he cannot do it again because he is a proud git, he tells himself,
He looks up at Amy and tries, but fails miserably, not to be overjoyed and ecstatic and oh so happy because he is married to Amy Pond.
Right now, he is the happiest humalien in the world.
A/N: Whoa long chapter! :O I didn't expect it to come out that long! Not as funny or humorous as the others but I had to get that chapter written to explain everything
J Kind of angsty at some places which I wasn't expecting :P What did you all think? Good, bad, woeful, confusing? Really sorry if it's confusing but it all makes sense it my mad head! So hope you enjoyed and please don't forget to review!