They didn't talk that morning. Reid changed into his scrubs and Luke put on his clothes from the night before. They fixed separate breakfasts and ate together quietly on the patio. They left early so that Reid could drop Luke off at the airport before heading to the hospital. The drive was silent.
Reid walked Luke as far as the front door of the small building before stopping awkwardly. Luke noticed after a few steps and turned back to see Reid frowning at him. It was more than a frown, though. Luke couldn't remember ever seeing Reid looking so… empty.
"I'll call you," he said, though the words sounded raspy after not talking for so many hours.
Reid nodded, unable to actually look at Luke's face. "Sounds good."
Luke didn't move until finally Reid looked up. They stared at each other longingly, their eyes perfectly announcing their regret and pain. Simultaneously they leaned toward each other, arms reaching and pulling, holding each other close. Luke breathed in Reid's scent, trying to etch it permanently into his brain. He closed his eyes, clinging desperately and hiding his face in Reid's shoulder. Reid did the same.
The embrace didn't last long, though, before Reid's pager went off. They pulled away as Reid reached for the device unhappily.
"I have to go," he said weakly. Luke nodded. Reid stared at him a moment long, reaching up and touching Luke's face with his fingers. To Luke's amazement, and heartache, he realized that Reid's fingers were shaking. As quickly as the touch had began, it ended, and Reid was walking back toward his car. Luke watched him for only a moment before turning inside.
A week went by.
No one in the Snyder camp dared to ask Luke what had happened, though they all knew immediately that something was wrong. Luke had arrived home Monday afternoon and gone straight to the foundation to work on some paperwork. He didn't come home until after midnight, and was gone again the next morning before even Holden woke up.
Back in Dallas, the sad story was the similar.
"Dr. Oliver?"
Reid looked up to see one of the nurses staring at him with a smile. His expression was blank. When he didn't answer she took that as an okay to continue.
"I was just wondering if Luke was going to be in town this weekend," she began. "He leant me one of his books, and I wanted to let him know what I thought about it, give it back, see if he had another suggestion for me, that sort of thing."
The peppiness in her voice made him sick. His expression seemed to show as much, for he noticed she was suddenly frowning.
He never did answer her, instead walking away quietly. He realized, sitting alone in the break room, that the old Reid would have at least made some snappy remark about how he wasn't Luke's secretary and didn't know his schedule, but for some reason the thought had missed him entirely. He sighed deeply, trying to figure out what was wrong with him, and purposely avoiding the answer.
Come Saturday night, Luke's absence weighed heavily on Reid. After a few minutes of debate he finally called, almost hoping Luke wouldn't answer but still feeling relieved when he did.
"Hi," Luke answered, his voice quiet and careful. Reid's mouth was caught in an awkward combination of both smiling and frowning at the sound.
"Hi."
The call was awkwardly casual. Neither was cheery to say the least but they didn't sound nearly as depressed as they felt, either. The irony was that hearing the voice on the other end sound so together and unscathed only made each of them feel worse inside. It wasn't a long call, maybe twenty minutes at the most, and consisted pretty much of daily recaps with little humor and none of their usual teasing comments. When they hung up they both decided to go straight to bed, tossing and turning for hours and feeling many times worse than they had before the call.
This was not the way things should be.
But sadly, neither seemed to be able to change it. They continued to call each other every few days and while the conversations did improve, they were still lacking that spark that allowed them to talk for hours on end. Now they were lucky to talk for even an hour before they were left with nothing to say. The sadness and anger began to turn them numb, and it wasn't long before everyone around them noticed.
"It isn't healthy, Lily," Holden insisted firmly. He and his ex-wife were sitting together at Lily's kitchen table, holding untouched mugs of now cold coffee and adamantly discussing their son.
"I just don't know what you expect us to do, Holden," she sighed. "Every time I try to talk to him he says things are fine, puts on a smile and walks out the door."
Holden frowned. "Sounds like the same song and dance he's been pulling at the farm. Most mornings he's gone before I am, and he rarely gets in before midnight. I have no idea what he could be doing with his time."
"My mother says he's been in the office a lot this week. I stopped by Grimaldi yesterday and Tom says that Luke has been in more than usual at their offices as well," said Lily. Holden nodded at the insight. "He's going to work himself silly, I just wish I could do something."
Her voice cracked and Holden reached out for her hand, squeezing it supportively. Lily forced a tired smile and squeezed back.
The moment didn't last long before the door was creaking open and Lucinda Walsh strolled in, rather loudly. The woman knew how to make an entrance. Holden and Lily retracted their hands just as Lucinda was pulling off her sunglasses, silently praying she hadn't seen anything. Lily and Holden were both seeing other people and content with being separated. Lucinda, however, was not.
"Holden, darling, it's good to see you," she said eloquently, of course, coming over and kissing Holden on the cheek. "I hope I'm not interrupting something," she said with a smile that indicated otherwise.
"No, mother, we were just talking about Luke," said Lily. Lucinda suddenly frowned.
"Oh, that boy," she sighed dramatically. "I've never seen him so out of sorts. Don't get me wrong, it's wonderful to see him so passionate at work, but some mornings I come in and I swear he spent the night at his desk!"
Lily and Holden exchanged worried looks, and this time Lucinda wasn't so oblivious.
"This doesn't have to do with that doctor of his by any chance?" she asked knowingly. Holden and Lily looked up.
"We think they're having a fight," said Lily matter-of-factly with a frown.
"Is that so?" asked Lucinda, pulling out a chair for herself and finally taking a seat.
Lily nodded. "Reid was in town just two weeks ago, and they seemed to be so happy together," said Lily sadly. "But I guess they ran into Noah and things got tense, and when Luke came home on Monday…" Lily trailed off, shaking her head.
"Luke's drowning himself in his work. He's going in at the crack of dawn and staying out til after midnight. He never mentions Reid or stays for dinner or plays with the kids," said Holden.
"Well that certainly does seem off," Lucinda interrupted. Holden nodded.
"The worse part is that we have no idea what the fight was about. Before he left Luke was saying that he didn't think he and Reid were at the point where they should be planning their futures together, and I could see them arguing about that, but I don't see how it could lead to such a huge falling out."
"And what did the good doctor have to say about that?" asked Lucinda.
"He wasn't a part of that conversation, but I did talk to him earlier in the day and truth be told, he seemed just fine. Hell, he seemed better than fine. I asked him if he loved Luke."
"And what did he say?" Lucinda pressed hopefully.
Holden shook his head. "Nothing, really, he sort of blew it off. I don't know if that means yes or no, but I can tell you one thing, Reid cares about Luke, more than I think even Luke realizes."
"Well if sounds to me like the two of them need to sit down and have a little talk," declared Lucinda.
"That's just the thing," interjected Holden. "He hasn't mentioned plans to fly back to Dallas any time soon, and I'll hear him on the phone sometimes at night and he sounds… tired, not upset, but just over it, but I know that's not true. I don't think either of them are budging or admitting how they feel about this."
"And Luke won't tell us anything about what is going on, so we can't even say any of this for sure," said Lily with a sigh.
Lucinda pondered for a moment, folding her hands on the table.
"Remind me, Darling, I'm getting old and I can't keep track. Today is the 2nd of May, is it not?"
Lily looked confused, sharing a look with an equally confused Holden.
"Yes, but why…" she began, but Lucinda held up a hand to stop her.
"I really must be going, dear," she said, standing up. Lily stood as well, hugging her mother and saying goodbye, but as she watched her mother walk to her car she couldn't shake the feeling that the infamous Lucinda Walsh was up to something.
"Should we be worried?" asked Holden, walking up behind Lily and apparently sharing her thoughts. Lily wasn't sure if she should frown or smile and so managed a face that sort of combined the two.
"With my mother, probably."
