Chapter 21: You Belong With Me
Kakuzu and Hidan head swiftly to their makeshift prenatal care room. It's really just Kure-Ji-Kira's medical room but Yamada enjoys calling it a 'prenatal care' room. Kakuzu had even started calling it that as well. Hidan thought that name was pussy and just called it, "that gay room where I get shit stuck in me and it's cold as a mother-fucker and it smells like piss."
They walk in and Hidan is pouting once again because his feet ache, his back is sore and he really, really wants a churro for some reason and nobody will get him one. He does cheer up at the fact that he will be finding out the gender of the baby today and he even smiles when he lays down on the hard metal table next to a bunch of electronic looking equipment. He shivers when one of Yamada's assistant doctors unzips his jumpsuit so his entire stomach is exposed to the cold air. Yamada walks in while putting on his gloves and asks with a raised eyebrow,
"Why are you so happy today?"
"We can tell what the gender of the baby will be today, can't we?" Kakuzu asks.
Yamada just rolls his eyes. "We found that out weeks ago. I didn't know you guys were both so interested."
"WHAT!?" Hidan yells. "What is it!? Girl or boy or whatever!?"
Yamada laughs. "It's actually quite interesting... In the test done on lab mice and other mammals, the most common outcome was twin males-"
"TWINS!?" Hidan nearly pulls his hair out. "You have got to be fucking kidding me!"
Yamada rolls his eyes once again. "If you would shut your trap for a moment then I could maybe mention that NO, you are not having twins. It's a girl, if you must know. One, single little girl. Let's hope it stays that way until it comes out."
Hidan's eyes widen. He looks down at himself and stutters,
"A- a girl?"
"Mhm..." Yamada replies as he focuses his attention something else. He leaves Hidan and Kakuzu to themselves for a moment as he discusses scientific things with the other doctors. Kakuzu is looking thoughtful as Hidan just seems shell-shocked. After a minute Kakuzu shrugs.
"I hadn't pictured a girl, but I suppose it's ok. Not like we can do anything about it anyway."
"A girl..." Hidan mutters.
Kakuzu glances at him nervously as if afraid he's going to make a grab for the nearest knife and rip open his stomach as he had threatened to do before. Hidan just smiles a little.
"I guess it's better than twins." He says finally. Kakuzu exhales.
"Did you want a boy?"
Hidan shrugs. "I didn't have a name for a boy."
Now Kakuzu is interested. "Do you have a name for a girl?"
"Tenmei." Hidan says.
Kakuzu wrinkles his nose. "Karma and god's will? I don't think so Hidan. I like the mei part though... So how about Reimei?"
Hidan glares at him. "I like Tenmei. Who gives a damn about fame and good fortune? She should be one of Jashin's children and know her place under his watchful eye. Besides... Tenmei sounds better."
Kakuzu's eyes narrow in preparation for battle. They argue about the name all through Hidan's check up and all the way until they get back into the common room where they ask the others what they think they should name her.
"Oh, it's a girl then?" Konan asks happily.
"Yeah, yeah." Hidan waves at her. "Tell him that Tenmei is a better girls name."
"What's the other name?" Sasori asks.
"Reimei." Kakuzu replies.
Deidara laughs. "Both of your names mean dawn, yeah. You should just name her Akatsuki after all of us."
Hidan and Kakuzu are taken aback for a moment then they both look thoughtful. They turn back towards each other and mumble,
"Well... I guess Akatsuki is a pretty name..."
"Yeah..."
Suddenly Tobi interjects, shouting,
"Why not just Mei? Mei is a pretty name!"
Both Hidan's and Kakuzu's eyes shoot open and they smile. They meet each others gazes as they both say that the same time,
"Dark..."
Kakuzu smirks. "Won't we be condemning her to a life of mischief and bad reputations?"
Pein rolls his eyes. "With you two as parents how could you expect anything more?"
"Mei..." Hidan says as he smiles at Leader-sama's words.
"I like it too." Kakuzu says. "Though I still think Reimei was just as good."
Hidan rolls his eyes. "I would never let you name her that."
Kakuzu smirks as he pulls Hidan closer.
"You're just lucky I didn't name her *Okane."
*Money
Hidan growls. "Bastard! You're lucky I didn't name her Jashina!"
Kakuzu makes a face. "That's a terrible name!"
"So is Okane!"
"Better than fucking Jashina! She would be made fun of!"
"Bullshit! If anyone tries to make fun of her, i'll teach her to kill 'em!" Hidan says with a smile.
"You're going to make our innocent daughter a murderer?"
Hidan shrugs. "She has to be tough at least. We've got to make sure she lives up to her name. Mei... I really like it!"
Kakuzu laughs. "Me too. Though Okane is still an option."
"Fuck off..." Hidan jokes as he wanders off to go get something to eat.
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One day Hidan is bored so he goes and sits down next to Zetsu on the couch. He glances at the bipolar man who has his arm around Tobi and after a minute Zetsu growls,
"Do you need something, Hidan?"
"I was just wondering how you guys make out?"
Zetsu and Tobi glance at each other then bust out laughing. Hidan gets annoyed and yells,
"I'm serious! I've never seen Tobi take that damn mask off! How do you guys do it!?"
"Tobi won't let anyone see his face and there are camera's nearly everywhere," Zetsu begins. "So... we go to the White Room."
"What's in the white room?" Hidan asks.
"Nothing!" Tobi says cheerfully.
"Huh?" Hidan asks blankly.
Zetsu laughs. "There's literally nothing in the white room. No furniture, no food, and... no camera's. That's why Leader-sama says we need to go there so we can talk privately about... you know."
"Ooooooh!" Hidan exclaims. "I get it! Damn, isn't that a shit load of trouble just to make out!? How come you don't take your mask off Tobi?"
Tobi lifts a finger to where a mouth would normally be and smiles.
"Tobi is a secret! Shhhh!"
Hidan just stares at them then after a while he goes over to the Akatsuki table. He notices that a bunch of the well known uke whores are hanging around the end of the table, where one of Sasuke's friends, Jugo, is sitting. Hidan motions to it and asks a rather bored looking Deidara what it's all about.
Deidara laughs a little. "Those sluts just want a piece of his meat, un. Didn't you see him in the showers, he's huge. Ha ha, but no matter what those little bitches do, they can't seem to get his attention. I don't even think he's gay, un."
"Oh," Karin interjects. "He's gay alright. His heart's just already been taken by someone."
"Who?" Deidara asks, suddenly getting interested. Karin's eyes twinkle as she knows she's got them hooked on her every word. She begins in a dramatic voice,
"All of us, who came with Sasuke, worked with Orochimaru before this. When Sasuke killed Orochimaru, we had nowhere to go, nothing to do, and Sasuke said we could come with him if we wanted, as long as we didn't slow him down, and didn't mind getting in trouble. That idiot Suigetsu came because he thought there would be tough people to fight wherever sasuke went. I came because um... well... I er... wanted to see all the hot guys in prison and Sasuke and well... anyways! Jugo came because he has a disease."
"What kinda disease?" Deidara asks nervously, glancing back at the passive Jugo.
Karin waves a hand at him. "It's a mental thing. Totally rare. In fact, Jugo might have been the only one in the world who had it. But... Orochimaru had used him as a test subject, and injected his DNA into other people, trying to make them stronger. This disease, affects rage, you see. You see how mild mannered and calm Jugo is now? Well, if you're ever unlucky enough to see him on an off day... run. He becomes a monster. His entire personality changes and he'll kill anything that gets in his way."
Deidara let's out a low whistle then asks, "But what does that have to do with his lover, un?"
Karin nods and continues, "Jugo hates his disease most of all. He is a very kind, gentle person, and he really doesn't like hurting people, or anything for that matter. So, when he becomes like a monster, he hates himself and he just wishes he could make it stop."
"Only a little while after living with Orochimaru and all the rest of us, Jugo met Kimimaro. Kimimaro was probably the only person, besides Kabuto, who was really devoted to Orochimaru. He told all of us that Orochimaru was the only reason he was alive. Before Jugo met him, Jugo was trying to commit suicide all the time, usually failing and causing everyone stress and alarm, but after he met Kimimaro... well, I think he became Jugo's reason for living. They were all but inseparable and Jugo would even smile sometimes when he was with Kimimaro."
"What was so special about this Kimimaro kid?" Hidan asks.
"Kimimaro could control Jugo. See, Jugo had his own disease, and they acted as a bit of a cure for each other. Whenever Jugo lost it, he would just get Kimimaro to snap him out of it. It was kind of sweet, actually. They were very fond of each other for a while..."
"What happened, un?"
Karin lowers his gaze. "One day... Kimomaro had to make a choice. He was about to die anyways, but instead of staying his last moments with Jugo... he went and fought for Orochimaru one last time. He died... and Jugo nearly broke. When he heard the news his disease took over and he killed 6 people before he got too tired and came back to his senses. When he came to he asked to be put in solitary confinement if they would not let him kill himself. He was in solitary for about a month, then Sasuke killed Orochimaru and broke him out. Jugo's disease was just about to take him over and then Sasuke... did something. I don't know what exactly. But it calmed Jugo down, so now Jugo follows Sasuke in the hopes he'll never have to hurt anyone again. It's a sad story... Jugo really loved Kimimaro..."
"Hm..." Hidan mutters to himself. "So I guess Jugo doesn't care about getting laid?"
"No." Karin says. "He really doesn't care about much except living a peaceful life..."
"That's nice, un..." Deidara mutter as he stares at Jugo's back. Then he notices some particularly daring sluts who practically try and blow Jugo where he's sitting and he growls. Deidara stands up, walks over to a surprised Jugo and faces all the uke whores yelling,
"He doesn't want any of you ugly fucks! Get it? Go the fuck away and bother someone else, un!"
All the uke's instantly disappear though a few do shoot glares at Deidara. He just glares back until they leave for good then he places his hands on his hips and 'hmphs'. As he turns around to go back to his seat he hears a low murmur of,
"Thank you..."
He turns around, surprised, then smiles at Jugo who nearly gives him a small smile back. Deidara then walks back to his seat and begins molding the clay he was playing with earlier. After a minute though, he gives up and smacks it down on the table saying,
"Where's Sasori?"
"He's in the kitchen, messing with the stoves." Kisame says lazily.
Deidara stands up and saunters into the kitchen. The next day he is smiling as he tells Hidan,
"Don't eat the mashed potato's, un."
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If you can imagine... I had a very hard time deciding between having the baby be a girl, like I had originally planned, or two male twins. The only reason this decision was so hard was because... if they were twins... i could have written them in TWINCEST. But... i really already have a terrific personality planned for Mei, which will be her name. So... Mei it stays. No twins... or twincest... just Mei. But dont fret! It'll still be great!
Hope you liked this chapter! Pwease review!
KeikoPanda102
