Chapter 24: Gives You Hell

Hidan opens his eyes lazily. He blinks. He hears loud, very loud, arguing somewhere to his right. He feels the dull thrumming of a headache in the back of his skull. He growls. The arguing seems to grow loudly. He growls louder, trying to get some peace and quiet. When there is no quiet he sits up hastily and screams at the top of his lungs,

"SHUT THE FUCK UP OR I SWEAR ON JASHIN'S GIANT COCK I WILL KILL YOU ALL!"

He then feels extremely lightheaded and promptly passes out.

Kakuzu rushes over to him and curses,

"Damn. He lost too much blood during the procedure, he needs a blood transfusion."

Yamada crosses his arms and turns away.

"This is all your fault. If you could have just waited a few hours we could have done this the right way."

Kakuzu, who has never had very good control over his anger, losses it. He wraps a fist around Yamada's neck and pushes him up against a wall, squeezing the thin flesh between his fingers. Yamada begins going red and a few of the other doctors in the room become flustered as if they don't know what to do.

"I should really kill you right now. It would save everyone a shit-load of trouble."

Yamada's already bulging eyes widen and he tries to squeak out a few syllables before Kakuzu inhales deeply and crushes Yamada's neck with one hand.

Seiji Yamada's lifeless body falls the floor and hits it with a sickening thud. The other doctors in and one nurse in the room scream. They stand still as Kakuzu sighs and turns around muttering,

"If you don't want to be next, leave."

They all run out of the room just as Hidan seems to wake up again. He promptly leans over the side of the table he is laying on and hurls.

"Shit..." He mutters as he wipes his mouth. "What the hell hap-?"

He stops when he sees Kakuzu standing over an obviously dead Yamada. Hidan smiles widely.

"You didn't?"

Kakuzu runs a hand through black hair and sighs as he says,

"Yeah, I did... damn. This might be bad."

Hidan stands up shakily and grabs Kakuzu's arm while smiling and yelling,

"What are you talking about!? This is perfect! Screw planning some detailed escape! That bastard was the only one keeping us here! I bet we can just fucking walk out now!"

For some reason Kakuzu feels the need to suddenly lean down and kiss Hidan softly on the lips. Hidan turns his head shyly.

"You freak! Why would you kiss someone who just threw up!?"

Kakuzu smirks and picks Hidan up, placing him back on the table. He then walks over to an incubator and pulls out a tightly wrapped, pink blanket. Hidan looks into it, confused.

He sees a chubby, red face snuggled inside the blanket. He then looks down at his stomach and gasps.

"You- you-"

Kakuzu smiles then suddenly Hidan hits him over the head with his fist and screams,

"YOU SERIOUSLY CUT ME OPEN WITH KNIFE!? WHAT THE FUCK!?"

Kakuzu laughs then Hidan's screaming make the small child open her eyes. They are a strange purple color. They also look strangely intelligent. Until she starts crying. Then she just looks evil.

Kakuzu panics. He tries handing her to Hidan and the Jashinist nearly drops her. She hiccups then falls back to sleep as Hidan holds her awkwardly.

"What do we feed her?" Hidan asks with wide eyes.

Kakuzu glances to the dead body on the ground and sighs again.

"Yamada had a plan but he hadn't felt the need to share it with me. Maybe it's in his notes..."

He starts searching around the medical room for a notepad when suddenly half of Akatsuki storm the room beginning with Leader-sama yelling,

"Is it true? Did you kill Yamada?"

His eyes fall on Yamada's body and everyone goes into a shocked silence. It is only broken by Mei's screams as she wakes up again.

Kakuzu holds up a notepad and starts flipping through it until he comes to a certain page then he says,

"Ah-ha. Found it... What the hell?"

"Don't you dare tell me he was planning on giving me boobs 'cuz if that's it, the little monster can starve!"

Kakuzu shakes his head as the others check Yamada's pulse and start talking amongst themselves about what to do. Kakuzu glances in the direction of Konan and Karin as Leader-sama turns to him and asks,

"Kakuzu, what do you want to do?"

Kakuzu isn't really paying attention as he replies, "Whatever is fine. Hidan and I will follow along with anything Akatsuki decides."

Pein glances at Hidan and he nods. Leader-sama sighs and says,

"I think the best plan as of right now would be to escape before the others find out about this. There would be chaos. We should get going. Now."

Everyone in the room nods. Kakuzu goes over to Hidan and picks him and the baby up. Hidan struggles for a moment but Kakuzu ignores him as the group of 13(not including Mei) makes their way swiftly towards the only entrance and exit inside Kure-Ji-Kira. They can see the door and there is no one blocking it then suddenly,

Yamada seems to come from out of nowhere and stands in front of the them, behind him a large amount of huge officers completely halt their escape.

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"Y- Y- Yamada?" Kisame mutters. "But... you were dead. We checked your pulse, YOU WERE DEAD!"

This Yamada scowls. No smirks adorns his face where there would usually be one. This Yamada looks angry, and strong. This Yamada has a more authoritative voice as he commands,

"Everyone in this little so called, Akatsuki group, will turn around immediately and walk back into the common room. I, Sono Yamada, will introduce myself to all of my new prisoners there."

The guards rush forwards and move everyone into the common room as this Yamada's words sink in. Hidan, who is still in Kakuzu's arms, whispers,

"Yamada... has a twin? Who the fuck knew that!?"

"Not me..." Kakuzu replies as he sets Hidan in a seat next to him and the rest of Akatsuki. Mei makes a sound but quickly falls back asleep. Hidan thanks Jashin because he knows that on top of everything he cannot handle a screaming, newborn baby.

There is a lot of talking in the room as the new Yamada walks up onto the stage on one side of the common room. He clears his throat and everyone goes quiet simply out of pure curiousness. This Yamada's eyes are angry and reproachful as he surveys the criminals. He begins,

"As some of you know, and some of you do not, Seiji Yamada is dead."

There are a lot of loud whispers but they are hushed so the new Yamada can begin speaking again,

"I am Sono Yamada. Seiji was my twin brother. He was murdered not half an hour ago by someone in this very room. That is not very important as if now. Right now, I'm telling you all that I will be the new prison warden for Kure-Ji-Kira. Listen carefully, prison warden. Because this is a prison, no matter what you all would like to think it is. My brother..."

Sono Yamada's gaze falls for a moment then he looks up ad continues,

"My brother treated you all like toys, like guests, and like people. Well you are not people in my book. You are criminals, and should be treated as such. From today onward, the rules inside Kure-Ji-Kira, will be changing. That is all I have to say for now."

He walks off the stage and out the door without another word. Leader-sama stares at Kakuzu then asks flatly,

"Why did you have to kill Yamada?"

Kakuzu just drops his head and into his hands and growls,

"I don't know. Look, what are we going to do?"

Konan glances nervously at Pein and she interjects,

"I- I think that it's been a long day and we should all just get some rest. Let's see how everything works out tomorrow. Maybe this new guy won't be as bad as he seems."

Everyone nods and the pure exhaustion becomes apparent on Hidan's face. Kakuzu thinks his husband might pass out any minute. he takes both his lover and child into their room and they all instantly falls asleep holding each other softly.

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This is kinda a short chapter but it's ok cuz a lot of crazy shit has happened in it. I will try to update soon. Like I said, reviews really help.

XD

KeikoPanda102