Sorry this took so long.

But here it is

Pictures in my blog and I also added new pictures under WMU extras in my photobucket. Please check it out.

And also, if you haven't added me up yet, I have a twitter page. Follow me to know what I'm up to and sometimes, I have teasers for WMU there.

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters. I also don't own the lyrics of the songs mentioned below.


So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire in the swing of your hips
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love

'Come On Get Higher'by Matt Nathanson


"Baby, I just talked to Leah. Jessica called her since she can't reach your phone. Apparently, you have more than a dozen offers for photoshoots." Bella told me. I just got back from the hospital yesterday and my manager expects me to come back to work. Nuh-uh!

"Tell her I'd probably go back to work next year." I told my girlfriend.

"Alice, this is your career. You have to personally tell them if your accepting their offer or not." As a professional and a long-time model, I trust Bella to be good at this. But come on! I'm still a little woozy from all the operations that I undertook for the past three days.

"I know. I'll call them after Christmas." I informed her. She nodded, accepting my answer, and joined me on the couch.

"Well, speaking of Christmas, what do you want to do?" Originally, we were going back to Forks but Bella told me that it was best if we stay here in the city. After what happened back last Thanksgiving, she doesn't want her past intruding our time there.

Renee was not happy about that but Bella promised her mom that we would come to Forks when the time is right.

Unfortunately, word got out what happened to me.

Alice Brandon a druggie? The model was seen with on again-off again girlfriend and supermodel, Bella Swan, leaving New York General Hospital yesterday due to drug overdose. Rumor has it that Ms. Brandon was in a depressed situation about her 'break-up' with Ms. Swan and started using drugs. But who knows, right?

The picture that the paparazzi took when I was in a wheelchair was the front cover of every gossip magazine you can find and every news channel with celebrities' lives as your main topic. It was irritating!

But Bella and I just let them talk. We didn't comment about it. It was our personal issue and they shouldn't have intervened. But this was part of our job. We understand that paparazzi were part of it.

"Can we stay here in the apartment? I just want to have a quiet Christmas with you." I cuddled close to her and rested my head on her shoulder.

We were sitting silently, watching TV when suddenly, my phone started to ring. It was Emmett.

"Hey Em." I greeted.

"Uhm, hey." He said a bit unenthusiastically. Not the Emmett I know.

"Are you okay? Is something wrong?"

"Do you have plans on Christmas?" He asked me.

"Not really. Bella and I were going to stay here at home." It was nice to finally call Bella's apartment as my home. All my stuff were already here when I came yesterday. It was truly my home now.

He sighed deeply and said, "Mom called me."

"What?!" I asked, shocked. My mother never did care about the two of us and it's quite shocking that she called Emmett. "What did she want?"

"Both her and dad will come here for Christmas. She asked for you to come too."

"Are you kidding me? Does she expect us to just forget everything she did to us and accept them back in our lives? Not gonna happen Em."

"Come on, Al! She sounds desperate for you."

"I don't know…" I trailed off. I didn't know if I wanted to see my parents. We never celebrated true Christmas together. It was merely giving stuff to each other. There were no stockings, Christmas carols, cookies and milk… The essence wasn't there.

I want my first Christmas with my love to be special. I wouldn't let them ruin it.

"Fine. Call me if you changed your mind." Emmett hung up after saying that. I feel terrible for upsetting Em but I'm not sad letting down my mother. She deserved that.

I threw my phone at the coffee table then dropped my head into my hands.

"UGH! I don't wanna see them." I mumbled against my hands.

"Who baby?" Bella asked rubbing circles on my back. "What's wrong?"

"My parents are coming for the holidays and my mother wanted to see me."

"That's great Al! You haven't seen them in years right." Bella sounded really happy for me but I wasn't. I don't know what I'm feeling right now.

"Can we not talk about this anymore? I just wanna take nap for now." Bella nodded then stood up from the couch. She pulled me up then guided me to her-- I mean our bedroom.

"Sleep, angel." She whispered. I closed my eyes but sleep never came.

I thought about my father. I thought about my mother. I thought about my childhood. I thought about how they treated me growing up. I thought about why they never were really parents to us. I thought about why I shouldn't give my mother another chance. I thought about what I wanted to do with my life.

I thought about my future.

What did I want to do with my life?

I wanted to continue modeling.

I wanted to design my own clothes again.

I wanted Jasper and I to go back to normal.

I wanted Rose to accept Bella in my life even though I know they're progressing.

And most of all, I wanted Bella to love me forever.

If that's even possible.

I was, and maybe am, a fuck-up. I never do anything right. Designing was my passion, I let it go. Modeling is my job, and now I'm slowly letting it slide between my hands.

I pushed Bella away and now there's this invisible line between us. Dividing us.

We were not the Bella and Alice like before. We were now the Bella and the broken Alice.

I am broken.

And no one can fix me.

Not my friends. Not my family. Not Bella. Not myself.

I don't know what to do.

"Alice, baby, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" I didn't know I was even crying when Bella noticed it.

Maybe telling her what's bothering me would tell me the answers to my insecurities.

"I don't know how you can just take me back. I don't even know how you can look at me. I'm disgusting Bella." I sobbed louder. Bella pushed me from her chest then cupped my face.

"What are you saying? I love you Alice. Whatever happened before, it was all in the past. I can't live without you. I haven't been this happy before you. You complete me." And with that, we both bursted into giggles.

Bella was a cheese ball.

"You complete me? Really, Bella?"

"Well, I'm a Swan. Deal with it." She shrugged. And just like that, I had my answer. "Please, Alice. Don't ever think like that again. You're good for me." She said seriously now.

"What will your family think of me now. I'm a mess."

"Yes, you were . But not anymore. Let's not think about the past and just move forward." Bella wiped the silent tears rolling down my cheek with her thumbs. "And as for my family… they love you Alice. I think my dad is crazy about you." She said with a playful growl. I laughed, remembering Charlie's charm.

"Thank you." I leaned closer to her and kissed her softly. "I love you."

**

Christmas Eve.

Emmett was still bugging me to come to their house later tonight for Christmas Eve dinner. He told me his ears would fall off if he heard our mother whine again for me.

Margaret Brandon would never whine ever. She was the most poised woman I've ever met. I never saw her laugh whole-heartedly in my life or give a genuine smile. She was hard, cold and selfish.

"She's changed." Emmett had told me. "I promise, Al."

Emmett would never lie to me. And even if he did, I would see right through him. I grew up with him after all.

"Made up your mind yet?" Bella asked from behind me, snaking her arms around my waist, pulling me closer to her.

"Yes"

"And…?" Bella pushed.

"I've decided I'll go tonight. I'm not giving her a chance. I just wanted to prove to Emmett that I'm right. They'll never gonna change."

"Baby, what if you're wrong. Anyone can change, you know."

"I don't know. I'll deal with that when I finally see it." I walked over to my closet and started looking for something to wear for tonight's dinner. It was only dinner at Emmett's house so I preferred wearing a casual outfit.

When I finally picked out my clothes, I found Bella lying down on our bed. I walked over to her and straddled her waist.

"Come shower with me?" I wiggled my eyebrows and pulled her up, still straddling her.

"You want me there?" She asked. Was she insane?

"Of course, I want you there. Emmett clearly told me it was family dinner." As I told her that, Bella gave me that gorgeous grin of hers that showed all her teeth. Her hands pulled my hips closer then nuzzled her nose into my neck, inhaling my scent.

"But what if your parents freak out about me? They still don't know about me, am I correct?"

"Well, maybe they've heard about that on TV but yes they don't. And I don't care. If they want me back into their lives then they have to take all of me. And that includes you."

We took a shower together, and maybe a little bit of love making here and there. Well, fine, we were not really that quiet. But it's all good. I missed Bella and I had to make it up to her for our lost time.

We changed for dinner, me a simple v-neck gray shirt, jeans and black boots. Bella on the other hand, wanted to impress them. But whatever she wore, she looked good. She put on a light gray tank top underneath a black vest. Since it was immensely cold tonight, she topped it off with a yellow button down shirt and a leather jacket. Fixed with jeans and blue sneakers, she wore light make-up then slightly curled her hair.

"I changed my mind. I don't wanna go tonight. Let's just stay here at home." I said as I slid my arms around her waist and kissed her along her neck.

Ooohh. She smelled good too. Yummy.

"I didn't dress up for nothing. Nuh-uh baby. Come on, let's go." I grabbed her hand then led me out of the apartment then to the parking lot to the Corvette.

We were driving down the busy and bright streets of the city as I rubbed my two hands together nervously. I didn't know what will happen tonight or how will I act in front of my mother. I haven't seen them in five years.

This is gonna be awkward. I can just predict it.

"Are you ready baby?" Bella asked me. I looked up from my lap and noticed that we were already in front of Emmett's house.

"I can't… I just… I-I-I can't…"

"Alice, calm down. Baby, don't be nervous. They're just your parents." Bella told me, soothing me as she held my hands and rubbed her thumb against my palm.

"No Bella. They're not my parents. Their monsters who destroyed me and Emmett's childhood. They're worthless creatures. I can't. I just, I don't want to see them." I was crying now. It's not that I cannot face my parents. It's more of an 'I don't want to see you' kind of thing.

"Stay here. I'm going to get Emmett." She slid out of the car then closed it behind her. In no time at all, my brother was opening my door then crouched down.

"Alice." Though it was Emmett who was beside me, it was definitely not his voice who called my name.

It was my mother's.

Margaret fucking Brandon.

Sorry this took so long but real life is getting on the way. But don't worry. Christmas vacation is fast approaching. I shall post another chapter when it comes.

Leave me some love my lovely readers. PLEASE REVIEW!