Chapter 40: When I'm Sixty-Four
"What are you doing here, Usuratonkachi?" Sasuke growled as Naruto made his way over to the furious Uchiha. Said idiot just rolled his eyes and smiled.
"Don't tell me you got yourself tossed in here for me?" Sasuke asked with angry contempt.
Naruto huffed. "Am I that obvious?"
Sasuke groaned and turned away, making his way back to his cell. Naruto, of course, followed him.
"Don't follow me, Dobe." Sasuke growled. "I'm really pissed off right now and I'm trying to think of a way to get you out of here."
"First of all," Naruto began, "You can't get me out of here, because I am a criminal and I deserve to be in jail. Second, I'm not following you, I'm going to my cell."
Sasuke's eyes widened. "You aren't-"
"In the same cell as you? Yeah, I am. Sasuke, we need to talk." Naruto's face grew serious but Sasuke could see hint of unease in his eyes. This small bit of fear made a bit of Sasuke's anger melt away.
"Why would you do this, Naruto? I mean, I knew you were stupid but to get yourself thrown in prison just to see me."
"So you aren't happy to see me at all?" Naruto asked through a glare.
Sasuke bit his lip. "No." He finally replied. "You need to leave. I've been telling you all along. I'm over you and I don't need you anymore."
"You're a lying bastard." Naruto spat back. "I didn't just come for you though. I came to give you a message from Sakura. She wants you to know she's over you."
"Good." Sasuke said monotonously.
"Yeah, she tried confessing to me and when I turned her down I think she finally got it. She's off somewhere with Kakashi now."
"Hn." Sasuke replied as he laid down in his bottom bunk. Naruto glared.
"Come on! I just told you some insane news! Sakura confessing, now she's with Kakashi-sensei! How can you not care?" Naruto screamed.
"I just don't." Sasuke said.
Naruto sighed then sniffed once. He turned to leave the room, but before he did he muttered,
"I'm not leaving, Teme, so you better get used to me."
As soon as Naruto left Sasuke felt a bitter black emotion well over his heart. It was as if the sun had left. He really did love Naruto, but this was not what he wanted. Now Naruto was stuck exactly where he was; no where.
Back in the common room, Kabuto glanced around nervously. He didn't really have anything against Sasuke, but that didn't mean he wasn't going to at least bother the egotistic brat. Kabuto knew Orochimaru wasn't as invincible or perfect as he seemed to claim, but he still respected him more than anyone else. His respect sometimes felt a little funny to him. It felt like something resembling love, but not exactly love. It wasn't so much love, as verging on obsession. It was a strange feeling that Orochimaru didn't help with every time he had sex with Kabuto.
It had happened a lot more when Kabuto had first stayed with Orochimaru, when he was younger. Or course, back then Kabuto had hated it. He thought it was disgusting, but the more he showed his dislike, the more Orochimaru seemed to enjoy himself. As he grew older, Orochimaru didn't screw him as often, but when he did, Kabuto pretended not to like it, even though in truth he did like it. Finally it seemed like Orochimaru was going to stop having fucking him all together and Kabuto didn't want that to happen. He tried to seduce Orochimaru, but in the end his lord made his admit his feelings. Kabuto was worried Orochimaru would hate him if he knew, but all the snake master did was smile and say,
"Finally."
After that he had fucked Kabuto much more, and it had been a very good arrangement. It was easy for Kabuto to develop his own form of the drug that induced pregnancy in men, and take it himself. Orochimaru didn't even notice. Kabuto was nearly 5 months when Sasuke killed the legendary sannin.
Kabuto glanced down at the child in his arms.
"I guess we'll be as safe here as we were out there..."
Suddenly a blond girl came up to him and asked, "You're Kabuto, right, un?"
Kabuto frowned and nodded, sure that this boy(he could tell it was a boy from the voice) was probably part of Akatsuki. He didn't know if he was on good or bad terms with the powerful group.
"Yes." He replied searchingly.
"My name is Deidara. Is that your baby un?"
Kabuto held the child closer and frowned. "How do you know about-?"
"Hidan and Kakuzu, over there, yeah. They have one too."
Kabuto's eyes widened as he looked over and saw, sure enough, two men playing with a baby that obviously shared both of their features.
''They must have been the test couple Lord Orochimaru was speaking of." he muttered to himself.
Deidara nodded. "So did you do it too, yeah? Have a baby with another guy?"
Kabuto shifted on the balls of his feet. "Kind of." He replied.
Deidara looked confused. Kabuto placed the child on the ground and took off it's hat, revealing it's face. Long black hair fell to it's waist and around it's pale, feminine face. Deidara stood back and stared for a while into golden eyes, surrounded by a light layer of lilac purple. It looked about one and a half to two years old. Deidara smiled.
"A girl, yeah? She's pretty."
Kabuto smirked in reply. "He is a boy actually. He's very feminine but he'll grow out of it."
"I can understand that yeah." Deidara laughed. "What is his name then?"
"Orochimaru." Kabuto said.
Deidara made a face. "Not very creative un."
"I couldn't name him anything else." Kabuto said.
"How come?" Deidara asked suspiciously.
"Because he is Lord Orochimaru. Well, a clone, actually."
Deidara nodded slowly then began to walk away. "Right... I see yeah..."
Suddenly Naruto came up behind Kabuto and yelled,
"You really made a clone of that pervert!? Why the hell would you want to do that?!"
Kabuto took a deep breath and rolled his eyes.
"Not like you would understand, but Lord Orochimaru was one of the most intelligent minds in history. He was simply a misunderstood, intelligent, and-"
"Don't forget perverted pedophile." Naruto added with a smirk.
The little Orochimaru was staring up at Naruto with curious eyes. After a minute he giggled and reached up, asking Naruto to pick him up. Naruto, who had not even glanced at the kid before, looked down with interest. His eyes widened when he saw the cute face. He bent down to the boys eyes level and smiled, patting his head. Kabuto frowned but didn't try and stop him because his child was obviously happy.
"How could you be cloned from someone so ugly, but be so adorable?" Naruto asked. Kabuto smacked the back of his head.
"Lord Orochimaru was not ugly! This is exactly what he looked like as a child."
"Whatever." Naruto grumbled as he rubbed his head. "Just don't make this kid as screwed up as the real Orochimaru was, and you'll be good."
Suddenly Kabuto looked around to see a bit of a crowed around him. All of Akatsuki was inspecting little Orochimaru and the boy began to get shy and hid behind Kabuto's leg.
"I'm very curious as to how you created a true clone. I wasn't aware we had the technology yet." Pein murmured thoughtfully.
"You may not have had the technology yet, but we did. It actually works a lot like the drug used to give males the ability to have children. Once Lord Orochimaru's genes were inside me the drug affected them to become not just variations of his genes, but exact copies. Then the clone just grows inside for the sam amount of time a child would. He will grow at a normal rate as well."
"So then, there's none of you inside him? It's all that creepy pervert?" Karin asked.
Kabuto seemed to blush suddenly as he pulled something out of his shirt.
"Well..." he muttered as he placed a pair of glasses on the boys face. "It really couldn't be helped that our genes would fuse together a little. This was only a test anyway. I just... I just wanted something of my Lord just in case something were to happen to him... as it did. It is mostly Orochimaru though, about 95%."
"Astounding science." Kakuzu said thoughtfully. He then moved a bit closer to Kabuto and muttered, "Just curious but... do you have any more of that man-preg drug with y-"
"I SAID NO-" Hidan growled angrily as he shoved Kakuzu away from a shocked Kabuto. "AND I FUCKING MEANT IT ASSHOLE!"
"What was that about?" Kabuto asked Konan as she smiled at little Orochimaru.
"Don't worry about it. Hey, can we give this guy a nickname? It might be confusing to call him Orochimaru all the time."
"Uh, sure. How about Oro?" Kabuto joked.
Karin shrugged. "Sounds good to me. Oro it is."
"Er, I was just kidding. Please don't nickname him Oro, at least call him Chibi Orochimaru." Kabuto said.
"That's too long." Tobi said, " Tobi knows! Chibi-oro!"
Everyone is quiet for a moment then, "I like it. Yeah, it's nice. Chibi-oro!"
Chibi-oro giggled below them and in Hidan arms, it seemed Mei finally noticed him getting all the attention. She reached her hands towards him and made annoyed grunting sounds. After a minute Hidan noticed this and placed her gently on the floor next to Chibi-oro. For a minute they just stared at each other, but finally Mei made the first move in reaching out to pull harshly on Chibi-oro's long hair. He flinched but didn't cry. He reached out and touched her scar with one finger. She closed that eye and made a face but didn't let go of his hair, in fact she pulled harder. She then seemed to notice that he standing up and she frowned. She grabbed a hold of Hidan's leg and tried to pull herself up. She was halfway standing when she lost her balance and almost fell. Chibi-oro caught her arm and helped her stand. When she was successfully standing she smiled then giggled along with Chibi-oro.
The others, who had been watching their interaction the whole time, smiled too. Kabuto exhaled happily.
"I'm glad you have a child too. I didn't want him to grow up alone."
"Yeah. Plus there's Karin's kid." Hidan said flatly.
Everyone stared at him in confusion except Konan, Karin, and Suigetsu. Their faces wore expressions of pure shock. Hidan finally noticed their faces and asked innocently,
"What?"
Karin was the first one to break the silence. "What kid?"
Hidan looked at her like she was stupid and said loudly,
"The kid you're pregnant with. I think I can tell... WAIT! Oh shit you didn't want anyone... Um- Kid? Never mind, I was just kidding so yeah." Then he tried to walk away inconspicuously. It failed. Karin grabbed the back of his jumpsuit and nearly tossed him into the floor.
"Hidan..." she muttered through clenched teeth.
"What're you mad at me for!? It was gonna come out anyway! You're getting FAT, bitch!" Hidan yelled as she started to strangle him.
"Karin!" Suigetsu screamed, the pitch of his voice growing higher than normal. "Are you really-?"
She stopped strangling Hidan for a moment to stare at an obviously panicking Suigetsu. Karin just rolled her eyes.
"Look, Suigetsu, it's no big deal. You don't have to worry about anything really. I can handle this on my own."
He made a shocked and offended face as he stumbled backwards from the shock of what he was hearing. He glanced down at Karin's stomach, noticing a slight bulge for the first time. He nearly fainted but instead he just ran from them, and from everything.
Karin turned to Kisame who wasn't that shocked, he had had a nagging suspicion that Karin was pregnant for a while. She sighed and asked,
"Could you please go comfort him? It's the kind of thing a father is perfect for."
Kisame just nodded and ran after Suigetsu.
I was just wondering how no one commented on when Tobi said that 'no pee-pee' thing a few chapters ago. I thought that was hilarious! But whatever XD
And yes, I do intend to call Orochimaru's creepy child clone Chibi-oro. Hope you don't have a problem with it.
