Thanks for the reviews guys! I really appreciate it! Maybe you could even tell me what I could do better some time c:
Whatever I did, I'd never want to hurt Tavros. But right now, even though it would hurt him, I'm hoping his date went horribly, that Dave wasn't serious. I don't really believe in this, since he did cook food and he's been cheerful the whole time I've been eating.
"Sooo, how'd the date go?" I ask just to be polite.
"Oh, it was awesome!"
My heart drops and shatters to pieces at this statement. I blink away the tears and smile.
"Great!" I say mentally beating myself. I only wanted his best. Right?
"We had so much fun. First we went to the cafe and talked a whole lot about stuff. Then we went to the park."
I tune out of his monologue. He's really happy. Dave makes him happy. He's not even stuttering now, just talking on and on about what they did. He had always stuttered before, no matter what I did Or anyone for that matter.
But Dave made him happy.
I nod every now and then, smiling and doing my best to act normal. I listen to his talking even as it tears me apart from the inside.
I should have done something while I still could. While I still had my fucking chance.
After he's done I get up, smile and say I'm going to go for a walk. He waves to me and starts putting the dishes away.
I get out of the apartment as fast as I can, taking only my phone with me. I barely notice the change in weather as I storm out of the building, rushing past houses and small shops, never stopping until I've walked around for some time. I take a destination and head once again for Karkat's place.
Wait, I've already been there. Don't want to bother him too often. Where to then?
Sollux's place. He was usually alone, he would listen to me talk, and he already knew about my feelings. Perfect.
After deciding on my destination I made my way to it, bursting into Sollux's house.
"What the fuck? Gam, haven't you heard of knocking?" he yells at me and his hetero-chromatic eyes make me flinch a bit. I try to not let them get to me this time as I close the door and walk to his bed, falling down there. Sollux follows me and sits down in his chair in front of his computer.
"Tho, what'th up?" he asks tilting his head slightly.
"Dave took Tav out on a date", I answer rubbing my temples lightly. Why did I have this fucking headache?
"Oh, now I get it", he says and stares at me. "Need a feelingth jam or thomething?" he asks and I sigh.
"Yeah, sure, whatever", I answer.
"Wait a thec, I'll get thomething to drink. Want thome Faygo?"
I nod and soon he's back with two bottles of Faygo, one for me and one for himself. I thank him, sit up and open the bottle, sipping some of the drink.
Then I proceed to telling him everything, how I hate Dave for taking Tav, how I couldn't really blame him and how I hate myself, because in the end it's all my fault. Sollux doesn't say anything, just watches me and drinks his Redpop Faygo.
I end my rant on everything and fall into silence, leaning against the wall next to his bed and drink the rest of my Faygo. I put the bottle down on the floor, since I can't reach a table and put my chin down on my knees, which I hug against my chest. I missed my chance. I missed my fucking chance. Karkat was right. He was always right. I should have done something instead of letting Tav go.
"Fuck, you really need help", Sollux says and I look up at him confused. "Oh for fuck'th thake, you're crying. You never cry!"
I hadn't realized the tears before, but now that I notice them I can't seem to get them to stop.
"I'll call KK, you need thome theriouth help, and I jutht can't let you go home all alone. Who knowth where you'd end up!" he says a tad worried. He goes to another room to call Karkat, making it impossible for me to make out any words.
He then comes back and crouches down on the bed in front of me.
"Lithten, you need to get yourthelf together. I don't care if you tell Tav about your feelingth or not. Go ruin hith relationthip, thee if I care! I jutht hate thith thide of you. I hate it when you get deprethed. Thoon you'll go crazy and thart hurting people. You know thith, Gamzee! Get a grip, man, and continue forward. Thop acting like you can't breath without him", he growls, and I stare at him taken back by what he just said.
"Shit, man, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to all up and get you upset", I say blinking a few times, trying to think of something.
"Tho you back yet?" he asks getting up and I nod slightly, not really sure.
"Good. KK thould be here any moment to take you back to your place. Do whatever you want there, but try not to break anything, okay?"
I just nod again and follow him to the door, where Karkat just arrived. He and Sollux exchange a few words before he grabs my hand and drags me to his car.
"I think I got this solved", I inform him on the ride back home.
"Got what solved, fuckass?" he asks grumpily.
"I'll try to make Tav the happiest person on the planet! Even if he doesn't want me", I add the smile on my face faltering for a bit.
"Good for you", he answers sarcasm practically dripping from his voice and I chuckle slightly. "Nice to see you're back."
"It's nice to motherfucking be back", I answer and he punches my shoulder, stopping the car.
"Now get the fuck out of my car, I have stuff to do", he says.
"Stuff to do with who?" I ask and he yells at me in a way that gets me out of his car and into the safety of my apartment in a matter of seconds. I watch him leave and wave lazily before he disappears, though I think he didn't see it. I then make my way up to our apartment. It could have been a better day, but at least I don't have to end it all gloomy and shit.
