Summary: When Axel is brought back to life to be with Roxas, they start searching for their other friends from the Organization. Through much difficulty they eventually achieve this goal, but what happens when the superior comes back mysteriously one day? How will Xemnas cope with having to live among normal people and being social? And will love find this man who seems to have a giant stick up his ass! lol. Yeah, better than it sounds. Eventual XemnasxSephiroth. Other pairings include akuroku, cleon,soriku,zemyx, and marluxiaxsaix.
Disclaimer: I obviously don't own kingdom hearts cuz if I did the organization would totally be a sex club .i'm horrible. :D But I totally own Zack and Haydn and everything that comes with them.=)
Genre: Romance/humor/angst/ action
Rating: T (possibly M in much later chapters)
Warnings: language,shounen-ai,and yaoi.
Author's Note: Well guys, I haven't posted a chapter in like three months and I'm very sorry for that. School is being a pain in my ass, so if you're looking for someone to blame, blame my teachers and the administration. Anyway, hope you guys enjoy this chapter.=)
End of Chapter 15: Zack's Diaries Part I:
Dear Mom,
Kane's gotten so big! He's starting to look a lot like Haydn, despite the blonde hair. He must have gotten that from his father, because everyone else in his family has dark hair. I think he'll wind up looking less like Haydn when he gets older, except for his eyes. They're exactly like Haydn's. The same shape and dark green color as his brother's.
~Zack
Chapter 16: Zack's Diaries Part II:
Xemnas found nothing in the rest of the journal that helped him find details about Zack and Haydn's life. Xemnas shook his head in exasperation as he went to the next journal. He noticed that that this journal skipped a few years in both Zack and Haydn's lives. The first entry claimed that the year was 1993. Zack must have been about thirteen.
Dear Mom,
Wow. I never thought I'd be able to write again. It's been a few years, hasn't it? I stopped writing because I was afraid that Dad would find out about my journals and destroy them. If he took everything away from me except for Haydn and my writing, I think I'd be able to survive. He was really suspicious of me for a while, but his attention has been focused on something else as of recently, but I'm not sure what that something is. I have no idea what he's planning, but I know that something bad is going to surface. It may not be in the near future, but time will tell what misfortunes lay ahead.
Haydn and I have gone through so much since the last time I wrote. It's amazing what time can do to a person. We've made friends with others that are outsiders in our clan. I can't figure out how we missed them before. Then again, most of them are better at pretending that they fit in with our society than Haydn and I are. I won't mention any of their names. If Dad or anybody else in our clan found my journals and saw my friend's names in them, they would be killed immediately. I wanted to take Haydn's name out of my journal, but he thought it would be a pointless effort. He's in so many of my entries that if I tried to rip them all out there would be nothing left.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Kane's differences within our clan is inevitable. He's too much like Haydn and I, even though he's only three years old. I'm afraid for the kid to be honest. When we finally get out of this place, I want Kane to come with us. I know it'll be hard because he's so much younger, but he'll never make it in our clan by himself.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Apparently Haydn's step-mother has a son that's our age that'll be coming to live in our clan pretty soon. His dad just died, so he has nowhere to live now. It's funny that she never mentioned anything about having a son before…she must not think highly of him. If anything, I hope he isn't like his mother.
~Zack
Xemnas went to the next relevant journal entry, wondering if this new person would play a big role in how everything would turn out in the end.
Dear Mom,
Haydn told me that his new step-brother arrived today. His name is Naoki and Haydn already doesn't like him. He must be horrible if Haydn is already doubting his character; he's skilled when it comes to identifying a good person from a bad one. Lets hope his first impression doesn't wind up being his only impression.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Some of the others met Naoki today and really liked him. Haydn's upset. It's very strange that Haydn hates him while everyone else likes him; I'll admit that. Hopefully I'll meet him soon so I can figure this guy out for myself.
~Zack
Xemnas found the incident very peculiar too. Haydn was a good judge of character and he was fairly certain that the other male always had been. Why was it that everyone else seemed to think that this Naoki person was a nice guy while Haydn believed otherwise? Xemnas scanned the rest of the journal to find that there was nothing in it that would answer his rapidly uprising questions. Xemnas put the journal in the stack with the ones he had already read and picked up the next one in the other pile.
Dear Mom,
Another year has gone by and Haydn and I are a year older. Being fourteen feels no different than being thirteen, yet, being thirteen and fourteen feels much different than being twelve. Anyway, I think Haydn's finally going to introduce me to Naoki in the near future. I've been begging him to let me meet him for a while now, so he should be giving in sometime soon. ;) I think he's reluctant to introduce us because he's afraid that I'll love him like everyone else does. We'll see what happens.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Haydn's introducing me to Naoki tomorrow! I'm kind of excited. I've heard so many good things about him. (And bad things on Haydn's part.) I want to see for myself what he's really like, and I'll finally get the chance tomorrow afternoon.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
I met Naoki today. He's nothing like Haydn says he is. He's so nice and completely unlike his mother and the majority of our clan. I don't see why Haydn hates him so much. When I asked him about it, he only said that Naoki gave him a weird vibe, like he was going to bring bad times in the future. I think he's just being stupidly paranoid.
~Zack
Xemnas contemplated Zack's words for a moment. Was Haydn just being "stupidly paranoid", or was there something more going on? He would never find out if he didn't keep reading.
Dear Mom,
Haydn's been bringing Naoki with him more and more often, but I can tell that he hates it. He won't get along with him, no matter how many times I try to convince him that he's not a bad guy. Now I'm afraid that he's mad at me. I hope he isn't…
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Haydn and I have started making some human friends. They have no idea what we really are. I hope it stays that way, but I wish they could know. But that's just a stupid fantasy. Humans can never really understand our clan. They'd be scared if they knew what we were. I hate that I have to hide who I am from everyone, but that's the way it has to be if I ever want to exist in the "normal" world. It's all right, Haydn and I can pull off the appearance of humans. We've gained so many of their characteristics over the years that Haydn and I practically are human…or should I say that we're almost human. I've realized recently that Haydn and I really don't know who we are. We hid behind masks every day, changing our appearance to fit the expectations of two completely different societies…
Maybe one day we won't have to hide.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
All of the girls that I'm friends with (human and clan girls alike) have been acting really strange lately. I told Haydn and Naoki about it, hoping that they'd be nicer about it than some of the other guys, but they were just as bad! They started laughing at me and I felt pretty stupid because I didn't know what the hell they were laughing about! Well, I guess Haydn was the one that was making fun of me the most, but I could still tell that Naoki was laughing at me too!
It took me a while to get them to talk. I knew that they knew why the girls were acting so weird, but they wanted to hide it from me! When I finally got them to tell me what was going on, (after nearly throwing Haydn into the stream and hitting Naoki with a tree limb) they told me that they like me. Not like as in a friendly sort of way, but in a like like kind of way. EWWWW!!!! I would never like any of them like that! That would just be gross. They're all like sisters to me, and I would never look at my sisters that way! (If I ever had any sisters anyway…) Come to think of it…I've never looked at any girl as more than a friend…
Is that normal for my age?!
~Zack (Who is extremely confused.)
Dear Mom,
I've been thinking a lot about this whole "girl problem" for a while now. All of my girl friends (as in friends who are girls), have been acting all giggly and flirty. I can't believe I didn't notice it before! It's so damn annoying, especially since half of them cling to me like leeches. Don't get me wrong, I love them to death as friends, but having all of them squeal over me is just creepy. (And harsh on the ears. They're very sensitive to loud high pitched noises.) I tried thinking about any one of them as more than a friend, but it just grossed me out. I even tried looking at them (in a more than friendly way) and that was just repulsive. I told Haydn about it and he said that I shouldn't be concerned. If I don't like any of the girls I'm friends with, then there really isn't anything to be worried about, right? I mean, just because all of the other guys look up their skirts and make dirty comments and flirt with them doesn't mean I have to…right? Then again, I've never really seen Haydn look at any of the girls or heard him make any dirty comments…so at least I'm not the only one. As for Naoki…I have no idea. I've never really heard him talk about a girl. Yet, he's so quiet half of the time that I really wouldn't know whether he has or not.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Damn it! My voice is starting to change! Everybody's laughing at me because of it, except for Haydn and Naoki, which surprises me, quite honestly.
Well, I guess there is a good side to all of this. I'm finally starting to get taller than Haydn. =)
~Zack
Xemnas found it ironic that Zack had once been shorter than Haydn, considering that Haydn was almost as small as Zexion. He continued to read about the events of Zack's teenage years.
Dear Mom,
This girl thing is getting bad. I want to tell them to back off, but I don't want to hurt their feelings. I think I'll get Haydn to do it. He is mean enough after all. ;)
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Apparently Haydn took care of the girl problem for me. Everything has returned to normal now…or as normal as it can get. I really hate the society in which we live…
~Zack
Dear Mom,
One of the girls must have NOT understood what Haydn meant when he said that I wasn't interested in any of them, because I just had a horrible experience today. One of my friends, obviously female, started pouring out her feelings for me today, and I had no idea what to do because I just DON'T like her like that.
I tried to say something, but she just wouldn't stop talking. Then she just kept getting closer and closer to me. I kept stepping back, but pretty soon I had backed up so far that I was trapped between her and a tree. She cornered me into a friggin' tree and I just kept trying to tell her that I didn't like her. Not that I was really able to, because the next think I knew she was kissing me. She took my first kiss away from me…and then I did something mean. I pushed her away as if I was disgusted. In a way I kind of was, but I didn't mean to be that insensitive about it…
Afterwards, we were both shocked, but I think she was more hurt than anything. I wanted to apologize, but she slapped me and ran off crying. Now half of her friends hate me, even though most of them knew me first and were only introduce to that little kiss stealer because of me!!
I really don't understand why so many of my guy friends are so in to those girls. Most of them are really pushy and persistent. I just don't get it…
I hope she doesn't tell her dad what happened. He'll slaughter me if he finds out…
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Haydn and I are turning fifteen soon! I'm pretty excited. The stuff with the girl is way behind me now. She moved on a few weeks ago and now she's going out with some arrogant prick. Whatever. As a result, most of her friends won't speak to me anymore. That's okay, my real friends are still with me, especially Haydn and Naoki. I don't know what I'd do without them.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
One of our human friends gave Haydn this strange musical instrument called a guitar for his birthday. Hopefully he'll learn how to play it soon, though I doubt he'll be any good at it. =)
~Zack
Xemnas found it ironic that Zack made this statement, considering that Haydn went on to be a really good guitar player. He flipped to the next page.
Dear Mom,
I'm starting to worry that there's something wrong with me. I'm fifteen years old and I'm still not concerned with the opposite sex. Should this bother me as much as it does? I wish you were still here Mom; then I could ask you about all of these things. I barely remember your face because you died so long ago…but I can still hear your voice encouraging me, even if it's only a distant murmur…
~Zack
Dear Mom,
I worry about the fact that the thought of being with a girl is kind of gross to me…but when I look at Naoki…no, I will NOT think about how I feel every time I look at him. He's just a friend, because that's all he can be.
~Zack
Xemnas assumed that around this time Zack was starting to figure out that he was gay. He continued to read, wondering how Zack would come to terms with his obvious sexuality.
Dear Mom,
I can NOT like Naoki as more than a friend! I just CAN'T!! He's a guy, and guys don't think about each other like that…right? I mean, I know that there are guys out there who like other guys as more than friends, but I'm not like that…am I? I don't have a problem with gay men…but that doesn't mean that I'm one of them…
~Zack
Dear Mom,
I can't take this anymore. I need to stay as far away from Naoki as possible. If my so called "feelings" for him don't stop acting up soon, I'm going to do something really stupid that I know I'll regret/ I'll just stop talking to him. That'll do it! If I don't talk to him, maybe he'll just lose interest in being my friend.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
It was so incredibly hard to ignore Naoki today. He kept looking at me as if he were wondering if he had done something wrong. I wanted to tell him that he did absolutely nothing wrong, that it was me that was mistaken…but I just couldn't say anything to him. If I had tried to open my mouth, I would have said all the wrong things. Haydn knows that something's up. He always knows. It's only a matter of time before he asks me about it, and when he does, I don't know what I'm going to say. I've never been good at lying to him.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Not talking to Naoki is getting to be impossible. He's so sweet and innocent and he doesn't deserve to be treated the way I've been treating him. I can tell he's hurt by the way he looks at me. I've been trying to act like I'm interested in the girls as a way to avoid him, but I can tell Haydn's starting to see through me. The way those dark green eyes stare at me makes me feel so uncomfortable sometimes. I can feel a confrontation coming on. He's definitely going to ask me what's wrong with me soon. I hope he's not upset, but why would he be? He hates Naoki anyway…
~Zack
Dear Mom,
It happened. Haydn confronted me on the whole Naoki issue. He asked me why I was being such an ass all of the sudden, and I kind of beat around the bush about it until Haydn got pissed off. Then…I told him. I told him that I might be gay…and that I thought I had a thing for Naoki…and then he laughed at me! He said that he though that that might be the reason. When I asked him if he was uncomfortable with the idea of me liking Naoki, he said that it would probably be okay, even though he doesn't like or trust him. Then I asked him if he was bothered by the fact that I liked guys. He just laughed again and said that he's known about that for a while now. When I got this clueless look on my face, he said that his gaydar had been sending him signals for quite some time. I just laughed and asked him if he was attracted to girls or guys…and he said guys, oddly enough. I wasn't expecting that. I would never expect that a guy like Haydn would be interested in men. Either way, he's a good guy. The fact that he dislikes Naoki but still gives me the room to like him amazes me.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
I can't do it. Just CAN'T! Now that I've gotten over the fact that I like Naoki, I don't know how to apologize for being such an ass to him. So instead, I've continued to ignore him. I feel like a horrible person, and Haydn keeps eyeing me like I'm a complete idiot. Which, I have to admit, I kind of am. I wish you were still around to give me advice…
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Today was horrible. The worst day of my life. Naoki hates me. I'm sure of it. Whatever friendship we had before is probably ruined now. Today the girls told him to stay away from me because I wasn't interested in him and some of the guys started picking on him. They started beating him up and Naoki just took it, even though he's a better fighter than most of them. That's one thing I'll never understood about him. Even when people are hurting him, he doesn't try to fight back even though he could easily kill half of his tormentors. He's just too gentle.
I didn't know why everyone was being so mean to him until later today when somebody told me that he told everyone that he was in to men…and somehow someone found out that he was interested in me. It can't be true. It has to be some sick rumor that someone made up after they found out he was gay because they have no life. I feel awful. I was right there and I didn't do a damn thing to help him. I just sat there and gawked at him while he got beat up. Haydn was the one who stepped in. Haydn. He had to stop those guys because they were picking on his step-brother; the step-brother that he doesn't even like. He's angry. He yelled at me before running off to find Naoki, who ran off somewhere after Haydn got those assholes off of him. I shouldn't talk. I'm the biggest asshole of them all. I can't even stop a bunch of guys from picking on someone that I care about.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
I tried apologizing to Naoki today, but he wouldn't listen. I don't think he wants anything to do with me. When I tried to talk to him he hit me in the face as hard as he could. I'm surprised that my jaw isn't out of its socket. It hurts like hell; I'm sure my cheek is going to be swollen for at least a week. At least Haydn brought me an ice pack. I'm glad he doesn't hate me too. He's still pretty damn mad at me though. He told me that I better make things right with Naoki before it's too late. He's right, as always.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Its been a month and Naoki still wont even look at me. What the hell am I going to do? I can't take it anymore! I want him to be my friend again…if nothing else…
~Zack
Dear Mom,
As I sit here and stare at the early morning sun, I realize that today is my sixteenth birthday. Its been ten years since you were taken away from me. Even though it's my birthday, I feel like today is a particularly dreadful day. Naoki still won't talk to me, and now I wonder if he ever will. I came out of the closet and told everyone I was gay a few weeks ago. Everyone was…surprised to say the least. Once again I found out who really values me as a friend and who doesn't. A lot of people have started to pretend they don't even know me. It's okay though, because I'm not totally alone. Haydn is still my friend, along with a few select others. Father hasn't found out yet, and hopefully he never will. Yet, I know it's only a matter of time before he figures it out and does something I know I won't like.
~Zack
Xemnas noticed that the next entry was from the same day, but it was written during the evening.
Dear Mom,
What started off as a bad day turned out to be amazing. Naoki and I finally talked. I was sitting by myself by the stream when Naoki showed up. He seemed really nervous and still kind of upset with me, but he asked me why I had been acting so weird anyway. When I told him that it was a long story that he probably wouldn't be interested in hearing, he sat down and said that he had time to kill. I think I started ranting, because the next thing I knew he was laughing and telling me to stop talking so much. And then…he kissed me. Just like that…out of nowhere.
I mean, I'm glad he did it, but I don't even know how it all happened. All I remember was pulling him closer and eventually I started making out with him. And now…I guess we're more than friends. We'll have to see how this works out.
~Zack
Xemnas vaguely remembered Zack talking about another lover that he had been with before they had met. Naoki must have been the one.
Dear Mom,
Naoki and I are still trying to figure out how to deal with everything. We know that we care about each other and that we're definitely more than friends, but we're not sure if we want people to know about it just yet. We told Haydn, but that's about it. He wasn't surprised, but I can tell he's not happy about it either. I'm sure he'll be okay though.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Naoki and I told everyone that we're dating. They were shocked, and I can tell that they think it's never going to last. Some of them seem to think that Naoki lured me into dating him. Well, they're wrong. Naoki is one of the sweetest people I've ever met, and I can't believe how he just fell right into my life. Everyone has this idea that I'm too good for him, but I wish I could tell them how mistaken they are. If anything, Naoki is too good for me.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Father found out, and now I'm covered in cuts and bruises. He hates me, or, at least more than he used to. I can't stand this society…another reason to get out as soon as possible. The strange thing about the whole incident was the fact that father didn't get angry at me for being with Naoki. It seemed like he was more upset by the fact that I'm gay. It was strange. Maybe I'll ask Naoki about it and see what he thinks.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
I told Naoki about what Father did and he said his parents reacted in almost the exact same way. I don't think they hurt him as badly as Father did me, which I'm thankful for. I wouldn't be able to look at him covered in bruises. He's too beautiful for that kind of torture.
Something is still bothering me. Why are our parents acting the way they are? Shouldn't Father be angry at me for being with Naoki?
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Every day I spend with Naoki makes my life a little bit more worth living. He's been so good to me and he puts a smile on my face no matter what kind of mood I'm in. I'm so glad I met him, but at the same time, I'm afraid I might be hurting my friendship with Haydn. I haven't really talked to him since I started dating Naoki. I really should talk to him. He's probably mad that I haven't said anything to him.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
I spoke to Haydn today. He seemed upset, even though he didn't state it directly. I felt bad for ignoring him so I could hang out with Naoki, so I mad a deal with him. I'm going to hang out with him tomorrow without speaking to Naoki at all. This is going to be hard for me. Since Naoki and I started dating, we haven't spent a single day apart, but I'm determined to do it. I'm sure Naoki will understand.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
I hung out with Haydn today. It was pretty fun. I didn't even think about Naoki, until Haydn brought him up. He asked me how things were going between the two of us. I said that we were doing pretty well and that he should hang out with us sometimes. I could tell that he didn't like the idea of that because of his feeling toward Naoki, but he said that he was up for it anyway. I guess it was so he wouldn't cause anymore problems between our friendship. I know neither one of us want that. If there's one thing I know, it's that I wont let Naoki get between what Haydn and I have.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Something strange is going on in our clan. Father brought back humans to feast on….but they weren't the same. I can't explain it…but it was like they weren't human at all. They didn't have a human or animal scent, nor did they smell like any kind of demon that I've ever sniffed. I know they couldn't have been demons; they looked far too human for that. In fact, they looked exactly like average humans. I asked Father about it, but he wouldn't answer. I didn't want to press him about it for fear that he'd make me eat whatever those things were. He's very aware of the fact that I don't eat meat. He seems to think that if he can brainwash me enough that I'll eat it.
~Zack
Xemnas thought about the entry very carefully. Could the beings that Zack described be Nobodies? They sounded like they could be, but there was no way of knowing for sure quite yet…
Dear Mom,
I talked to Haydn about those things that Father brought back yesterday. Haydn said that his dad did the same thing, and him and Naoki were just as puzzled as I was. When they tried to ask about it their parents wouldn't answer either. So strange…
Naoki wasn't with Haydn today. I was worried until Haydn told me that his parents had Naoki in intense training. When I asked why they weren't putting him through the same hell, he said that it was because his parents seem to believe that Naoki has more potential than him. I think that's complete bullshit. Haydn has just as much potential as Naoki. Everyone used to think that I was the weakling in the clan, but now I'm stronger than the majority of them. Not that I'm proud of it. If I had my way, I'd be human so that I didn't have any of this power. Yet, with the life I'm living, I have a feeling that this power of mine will come in handy one of these days.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Haven't seen Haydn or Naoki in a little over a week. The clan has been bringing back more of these dead things that I mentioned earlier. They're presence among the clan's feasts is becoming more and more frequent. I wish I knew what was going on. It's like they've forgotten that they used to feed on humans.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Haydn, Naoki and I are growing more disturbed by the increasing number of these strange, dead beings in our clan. What's even stranger is the increased amount of power among many of the clan members, especially the increase of power within my Father. We can all feel it. Pretty soon, I'm afraid that even you'll be able to sense it mom, even though you're all the way up in heaven. Why is this happening? Why has Father's power nearly doubled in such a short amount of time? Does it have something to do with these things he's feasting on?
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Naoki found out a few answers to some of our questions. He overheard his mother and father talking about it. Those things are called Nobodies. Such a strange name these creatures have. Naoki also found out that these things really are giving our clan power. He couldn't find out anything else; his parents didn't say much about these Nobodies after that. This is scary mom. How much stronger will father get? Does power reach a limit at some point, or does it extend infinitely? How and why do these things give our clan power? I hope we find out soon.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
What are we going to do about this? Everyone is growing stronger and Haydn and Naoki and I can't keep up. We don't know how to deal with this. If the three of us, and any followers that we have left, want to get out of here, then we have to be stronger than them! The only problem is…I don't know how to do that. Naoki turns to me for comfort, but what do I say when I have no clue what our next move should be? I turn to Haydn for help, but he's at a loss for words too. We need to figure this out. Things are getting worse fast.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
The only thing we can do is train. Naoki, Haydn and I have been working our asses off, and we're definitely making progress, but I feel like it will never be enough. I can't stay to write. I need to go train again…
~Zack
Dear Mom,
I think that I've found an answer…but I'm not sure whether or not to trust this person that may be able to help us. I'm scared that he'll wind up telling my Father everything because he's one of his followers. He claims he can help us get stronger and answer all of our questions. Should I trust him mom? He must be a few years older than I am, and I didn't even catch his name. Haydn and Naoki and I are still deciding whether we're going to meet him in a few days in our usual spot like he told us to. It could be a trap…but then again, what if it's not?
~Zack
Dear Mom,
We've decided to go tomorrow. We just have to be careful. If anything bad happens…then I'm really not sure what we'll do. If we were ambushed, the only thing we'd be able to do is run…
~Zack
Dear Mom,
It wasn't a trap. This man is actually trying to help us! When we got there, everything was silent. As soon as we started getting uneasy, he showed up. We asked him for his name, and he didn't say a word…and then, he let his mind block down. His mind was so hectic. I don't think he has ever let anyone know what's going on in his mind…
He's been one of my father's main followers for years, practically since birth. My Father saw a lot of aptitude in him at an early age and recruited him almost immediately. Yet, despite this, he still managed to see the faults within our clan. I was surprised to see that he's managed to keep going for so long. I wouldn't be able to keep going if I didn't have Haydn and Naoki. This guy…he's been on his own his whole life. He's never had any friends…ever. He's just been waiting to gain some allies so that he can break free from this hell, and now, he has us. He's considerably stronger than us, and he knows everything about my Father and his minions. He's going to help us get stronger and tell us about my Father's plans…and these strange Nobodies. He would have done it today, but we ran out of time. We all have orders and obligations to fulfill if we ever want to get out of here without looking suspicious.
This man, he seems like he'll be a good ally, but I wont know for sure until later. I would write his name down, but that would be too much of a risk. The only reason Haydn and Naoki's names are in here is because they want their names to be written so that they can go down with me, if it comes to that.
~Zack
Xemnas couldn't believe it. Zack had known what a Nobody was. The entire time he was with him, he was aware of the existence of the Nobodies. Yet, this didn't necessarily mean that Zack had known that he was a Nobody. (At least he wanted to believe that Zack had had no clue.) Who was this new ally? How important would he be later on? Xemnas eagerly turned a few pages and found Zack, Haydn, and Naoki's next encounter with this man.
Dear Mom,
We met with our source again. He told us what Nobodies are and I'm still trying to comprehend it all. Maybe writing it down will make it easier.
First of all, these Nobodies are stranger than I ever imagined them to be. From what I was told, I gathered that they are beings without hearts. How is this possible? How does something thrive without a heart? Does this mean that they contain "no emotions" too? Are we somewhat like these Nobodies? Our clan claims to have no emotions, so do we contain no hearts too? That has to be impossible. I can feel my heart beat as I write my doubts down. I have to have a heart, I wouldn't exist without it.
I asked him if this were true for the Nobodies too, but he just doesn't know. He can only figure out so much about these beings. Although he didn't know the answer to my question, he did say something very interesting when I brought up the word "existence." He told us that these people were never meant to exist. I asked him what he meant by that, and he said that Nobodies are basically half of a person. As shocked as we were to hear something like that, we were also very eager to hear more.
It all started with the Heartless, beings that go around and feed on weak hearts. They're born from the darkness in people's hearts. When someone's heart becomes too overcome by darkness, the Heartless devour them and turn them into a Heartless as well. No one is quite sure how this happens, but apparently it is believed that research is being done on the very subject. It has been found that the Nobodies are created by the empty shell left behind from those that are turned into Heartless. Therefore, they have the soul and the body of a human, but lack the heart. It's all very confusing, and I don't know what to make of it. Hopefully I'll have more answers soon.
~Zack
Xemnas knew everything about the creation of Heartless and Nobodies that Zack knew plus more. He had a feeling that Zack was going to figure out everything, so he continued to read about his discoveries, wondering what this mysterious man would tell the trio next.
Dear Mom,
Today I asked our source why I've never seen these Heartless, considering that our whole clan is shrouded in darkness. He said that it's because my Father has a shield around our territory. Apparently he wants to learn how to manipulate these things before he lets them roam our land. He's intelligent enough to know that if he let those things into our land right now that they would destroy the majority of our clan because they are so consumed in darkness. Not that he'd ever put it in those words. He would never say anything to make our clan look like it has any weaknesses. He's never admitted to faults.
We asked about these Nobodies again, and where they come into play in this whole situation. Our source claimed that it started off as a complete accident. Some higher ups in the clan went hunting for humans and wound up killing a few Nobodies instead. They immediately noticed that they weren't human because their smell doesn't match that of a humans at all. They brought the Nobodies back to my Father and he examined them for quite a while until he finally got up the nerve to taste one of them. He found that he liked the flavor much more than humans and decided to make his lackeys hunt down more of them. They soon started finding many of these beings and began devouring them. Shortly after, they started to notice a strange increase in their power. They've been growing stronger and no one is quite sure why. My Father has been doing research to figure it out, but nothing has been found yet. Hopefully I'll have more answers next time.
~Zack
Xemnas found the entry odd. How could consuming the flesh of a Nobody make someone more powerful? What kind of research was Zack's father conducting? Was it possible that it was anything like the research he conducted all of those years ago? He didn't want to think about that possibility. Surely no one else had tried to accomplish the same things he had. How had Zack's Father managed to block the Heartless? Even he had thought that to be impossible. Did anyone have the capability of being that powerful? The thought disturbed him. Xemnas anxiously read the next relevant journal entry.
Dear Mom,
Father's trying to accomplish something that sounds completely ridiculous, but if his plans work…I'm afraid that there will be dire consequences for everyone. From the information I've been given by my source, it seems as though Father's experiments have been paying off. He hasn't figured out why eating these Nobodies has given him this power, but he has developed a theory that if he eats enough of these Nobodies that he well reach a state of immortality. It sounds crazy…but what if it works? What if Father becomes that powerful?
How did Father come to the conclusion that these Nobodies are not only boosting his power, but also increasing his lifespan? Are Nobodies really that different from us, regardless of their lack of hearts? It's so perplexing. We know that Father's main goal is to become more powerful than any other on Earth. He's wanted to take over the world since before I was born. The power hungry bastard…
~Zack
The next entry Xemnas read surprisingly had nothing to do with Zack's Father's plans, but had everything to do with stopping him.
Dear Mom,
I've been so busy talking about Father's plans that I feel like I haven't had any time to talk about our training with our source. He's pretty tough. He still beats us, even when all three of us take him on at once. He said that if we each can't handle him individually, then there's no way we stand even the slightest chance of winning against my Father and his supporters. He's much too powerful for us. Our source is about half as powerful as him, and we can't even manage to defeat him with all of our power combined!! That thought really scares me. What if after all of this, we all wind up dead just because we were too careless with our abilities? I can't even imagine what I'd do without Haydn and Naoki. They're my life. If they die, I'll have to go with them. There's no chance for me in a life without them by my side.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
We've been so busy with training and trying to figure out what my Father's up to that I feel as though I haven't had any time for Naoki. I feel awful about it, but Naoki understands. He hasn't had much time either. I'm still completely in love with him. My seventeenth birthday is coming up soon. I hope I can do something special with him then.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
Apparently Father's found more breakthroughs in his research. He says he's found out why he's gaining so much power. He thinks that the darkness has a major role in it. The darkness in his own heart combined with the darkness of the souls of the Nobodies has caused a dramatic increase in his power. I would have to disagree. I think that his darkness will eventually get the best of him. Darkness will only destroy him in the end.
~Zack
Dear Mom,
How can the power of darkness make someone immortal? Can such a thing happen? How is one led to believe that darkness makes them stronger? I just don't get it. I'm terrified of the idea of Father becoming immortal, but will that really happen? The only way we'll ever know is if we wait. Only time will be able to tell.
~Zack
Author's Note: Sorry guys, but Zack's diary entries are going to be broken down into four chapters instead of three. There's just way too much to cover for three chapters, so sorry if you guys thought that this ended kind of strangely. Anyway, please review!!! I will love you forever and give u a digital cookie!!!!=) But seriously, review this fic because I'm addicted to reviews like they're crack.
