Heya, guys. ;D It's the wonderfully beautiful MaxWaylandGrey updating for camibandlover! Yes, yes! This is terribly late and I take the blame! I've had this for quite a while in my inbox but life is terrible and a bitch and such a hassle at times that I just didn't have time to beta. *sigh* Anyways, at least this is here! Now, why isn't the bitch here to post it? Because she's having this weekend sleepover with her friends. I know. LAAAAME. ;) Well, I don't have instructions on who to thank because I shouldn't even be posting this... ;D ANYWAYS! I guess I'll just thank myself! Yes! Cams wants to thank me for being the most amazing person that she's ever met! Ugh, yes. Camille is such a cliche at times. *shrugs* Can't blame her. I am pretty fucking amazing. xD Omg, I'm being a cocky bitch. Okay, go read! And don't forget to review! :D
Pandemonium, Clary thought, reminded her of home.
It reminded her of the time her and Simon snuck in the first time, and they were so shy, lingering in corners, until he asked her to dance. She'd grinned shyly and obliged. They spent an hour dancing, losing themselves in the music, and by the end of the night she was dancing with some guy named Raphael and he was dancing with some chick named Chloe.
"That was amazing," Clary had said once they left. She felt breathless, but energy still coursed through her, and she felt as if she would never sleep again.
Simon grinned. "I know. I actually made out with Chloe."
"I'm glad I didn't make out with Raphael," she replied to that. "He was nice and all, but he looked like he wanted to fuck me then and there." Clary shuddered at the thought.
"I'd have killed him," Simon said, his voice dangerously low.
Clary tried to imagine Simon, skinny and dorky, beating up Raphael, who was tall and buff, and she ended up snorting. Her best friend looked offended.
"No offense, Si, but I don't see that happening."
He scoffed. "If he and I ever meet again, we'll see about that."
Now, as they entered the club, Clary felt a rush of excitement. It was like she was back to being her old self, innocent and feisty in the way every oblivious teenage girl was. She just wanted to fall in love back then, to have a guy hold her in his arms. And, tonight, the guy was Jace.
He held her hand as they slipped inside the crowd of people who were gathered in the middle of the club. It was full, for it had opened only one month ago. They went into the bar.
"What do you want?" Jace shouted over the music.
"A Coke!" Clary yelled back, and he nodded and ordered their drinks. He was drinking some kind of strong-smelling alcohol that Clary wouldn't even smell too much. She tried to make as much distance between her and the cup he was holding as possible. The smell of alcohol sickened her, ever since her mother once slapped her when she was drunk. Clary drunk, sure, but just for the feeling. The smell bothered her a lot.
"You okay?" Jace asked, slipping an arm around her shoulders.
"I'm great," she said.
He set his drink down. "Let's dance."
She took one last sip of her soda, held her arms out, and let her boyfriend lead the way to the dance floor.
###
"Look at those two," said Isabelle, taking a sip of her Sprite and staring at Clary and Jace. "They're so adorable." She sighed longingly.
Simon rolled his eyes. "They're disgusting. And, Izzy, if you want to dance, we can dance."
Her eyes lit up. But then she thought, We can never move the way they're moving, because we're taking it slow. She rolled her eyes. Fuck it. "Let's dance," she said to Simon, taking his hand and leading him to the dance floor.
On the way to the center, however, Simon stopped walking. "Si," Isabelle said, annoyed. "Come on, let's dance."
He was looking beyond her, however. She followed his gaze and only saw a guy with blond hair and dark eyes. He looked pretty damn handsome, in her opinion, but Simon was straight as hell, so why would he be checking out a guy? She sighed and tugged on his hand.
"Simon, what's wrong?" Now Isabelle was frowning as Simon's expression darkened considerably.
He swore under his breath. "Shit. Shit, Isabelle. I just―come on," he said, and he led her to a corner where they could watch a guy without being too close. That way, the guy couldn't see them. "He's Clary's brother. Jonathan Morgenstern." He said the guy's name bitterly. Why would Clary's brother be so bad?
"And?" Isabelle prompted, staring at Simon demandingly.
"He hasn't been seen since his dad walked out of Clary's life." Simon glanced over at where Clary and Jace danced passionately on the dance floor. "Why would he show up now?"
"You do realize I still don't get it, right?" Izzy said, hands on her hips. "Simon Lewis, you better explain what's going on."
He rolled his eyes. "You sound just like my mother."
"That's a weird thought, considering we'll end up making out tonight." She winked at him, knowing fully that she'd planted some very disgusting mental images in his brain.
Simon glared at her. "I hate you."
She smirked. "Come on, Si, tell me."
And he did. He told her all about how Clary's mother was sick of her father, and she threatened to run away. Valentine didn't walk out of their life. He left to a basketball thing with Jonathan for a weekend, oblivious to the fact that, when he got back to their mansion in New York, the girls would be gone. That they'd be in Canada, where they first lived (because Jocelyn wanted to get as far away from her husband as she could). He told her that she left her son behind, all because Jonathan preferred his father anyway, and she didn't want him to resent her more than necessary. So she took Clary and fled. She moved every few months, but left Clary in the same boarding school for a year, and then she was changed to Portland, New Jersey, Tennessee, Texas, California, New York (much to her mother's dismay), and, next year, her mother was taking her to England.
Only Clary didn't want to keep moving, Simon said. Clary wanted to stay in her house with her mother and to forget about Valentine. She said that the motherfucker didn't matter to her, but Jocelyn wouldn't listen. There was something else to the story, something Clary didn't know, which meant Simon was in the dark as well. Clary knew it had to be bad and that it dealt with the law. She'd been slowly piecing it together. Her mother never needed any money. Luke worked for the sole pleasure of it, but he'd retired right after Jocelyn decided to take him with her. She'd been having an affair (one Clary was aware of, which deepened her depression at the time) with Luke, which was why Clary could tolerate him less than she did when she was a child and he was just her father's friend.
Valentine, Jocelyn suspected, was always tracking his family down, and Jonathan was helping him. Was it a coincidence that they were in California and that Jon was in the club? Simon asked, and then answered: "No, it isn't, Isabelle. They're up to something. We have to find Clary."
Isabelle absorbed the information quickly. She took sharp intakes of breath as if it was just a scary story, but she knew better. It was scary, alright, but it was also real. And she had to help her friend before her dad did something to her that no one could take back. The man must've been full of revenge, Izzy figured.
"What do we do? I mean, he'll know!" Isabelle exclaimed. "If he's watching her, he'll know."
"Nah, he doesn't know me, or you, or Jace, or Alec, or Magnus, and we're not supposed to know him. She showed me a few pictures," Simon explained, before she could ask anything.
"Okay. Well, we have to warn her!" she hissed, and then Jonathan started to move―he was getting closer to Clary. "We have to do something, Simon! And if you're not ballsy enough to, then I will!"
"Jesus, Izzy, calm down." Simon stared at her until she snapped her mouth shut, swallowing her protests. "Listen, we have to form a plan."
"Shut up, you idiot! There's no time for a plan!" She was practically yelling. "Don't you care that your best friend is about to get into some deep shit? Because I do!"
"I do, too!" He was almost shouting along with her. He tried to swallow his anger. "God, Izzy, listen to me. You're gonna go make a distraction and bring me Clary. Go flirt with Jon." He shut his eyes as if the thought pained him, which it probably did. Isabelle felt proud that she could make him feel that way. "Flirt with him. Do what you need to do. I'll go warn them."
Isabelle knew that he wasn't trying to sell her off. He was doing what he had to do to protect Clary. She nodded, because she was willing to do whatever it took, too. "I'm gonna go, okay? Simon, please hurry. I mean, it's selfish to say so, but please, please hurry. I don't wanna spend an extra second with that bastard. I have a feeling he's just like his father, which isn't a pleasant thought." She looked a bit desperate, and she hated herself for it.
"I will do everything I can," said Simon, kissing her in the lips.
She transformed, right then, right there. She did something to her shirt so that it would show her stomach, and with her hands, ripped out a part of her tights. She winced. "My favorites," she said, and that was that. Then, she blew him an air-kiss, and walked towards Jonathon. She would never tell Simon this, but she felt confident, more like herself.
She just hoped he'd hurry the hell up and get Clary to a safe place. Isabelle knew there was something not right about this whole thing. No one would be scared of Valentine if he wasn't actually dangerous. She bet he could kill. She bet her life was in danger.
Friendships, she thought, made people do stupid things.
She reached Jonathan. He was really good looking, which would make the job easier. She put on her best mask, the sexy-yet-confident one, and stood right in front of him. Her cleavage was popping out. Her nipples almost showed. Good god, she looked like a total fucking slut.
Jonathan's eyes widened as he saw her, and then a playful smirk settled on his lips. He waited for her to make the first move. He leaned against the wall, arms crossed over his chest.
"Hi, there," Isabelle said, and her voice, thank god, was silky smooth and confident. It flowed nicely, in a sexy manner. She felt like a whore, which should've disgusted her, but it was her job for the night. Be the whore, save her best friend. She didn't really care as long as everyone was home safe by the time the night ended.
"Hello." His smirk turned into a grin.
"What's your name?" Izzy was standing close to him, but not close enough. He had a leg up against the wall. Without thinking, she went for it. She stood right in front of his knee and then she said, "May I sit?"
His eyes widened even more and he nodded. She spread her legs out so that he could see the outline of her underwear, and then he sat gingerly on his leg. "Would you like to go somewhere more private?" she asked.
He looked hesitant. He glanced over at Clary's direction, and so did Isabelle. "Did the pretty redhead catch your eye?" she asked innocently. Simon hadn't reached them yet.
"You have no idea," he said, but it sounded like he was breathing it out slowly. Then he shook Isabelle off abruptly. "I can't go anywhere. I'm sorry. I'm kind of―I can't get distracted."
"She's taken," Izzy said. "And I'm not."
"I saw you with some guy."
"Saw me, huh?"
"Fuck off," Jon growled.
She smirked. She knew she had him. "I'll show you a fun time. If you wanna hook up with the redhead―" Izzy jerked her head towards Clary "―then you'll have time."
Jonathan returned her smirk. She saw that he was giving in. "I guess it won't hurt."
"No, it won't." God, guys were so stupid, Isabelle thought.
"Let me just make a call first," he said. Isabelle started to panic.
Just as he was starting to leave, she grabbed his arm, "Shit, we don't have much time! My crazy ex is here. Just fuck me, you dickhead." And before he could react, she pulled him to her, and they were kissing. His mouth tasted like alcohol and cigarettes. She swallowed down the bile that rose up her throat as he pulled her closer to him to kiss her harder. Soon, he had her pinned against the wall. He was kissing her neck and she was leading his hands through her body. She felt him squeeze her breasts, and since he wasn't looking, she shut her eyes. Then she gave Simon a panicked look from the distance, even though he couldn't see it. She felt tears of desperation threatening to come out, but she blinked them away. She wouldn't cry. She pulled him closer to her as his lips found her waist.
"Let's go somewhere more private," she urged.
"Mhmm," he murmured, taking her hand and leading her through one of the four exits. This one was the left one. At least she got him away. All she had to do. It wouldn't be so―
Her thoughts were cut off by him slipping his hand down her panties.
Izzy wanted to scream until she had no voice. Help me! Somebody. Please. Simon. God. She shut her eyes and fought back the pool of tears that had settled in her eyes. She had promised Simon. She had to keep her promise. Even if it meant going all the way with Jonathan.
She decided that, if she had to do this, she'd enjoy it. She pinned him against the wall. His eyes were surprised, but all she did was kiss him. Kiss, kiss, kiss. Mouth open, tongues almost down each other's throats, hands under his shirt, playing with his nipples, stroking his abs, and then going down his pants. She felt him tense.
"Too much for you?" she asked teasingly.
"Not nearly enough," he gasped out, and then her phone rang.
"Hold on." She held up a finger. Simon. Thank god. She hung up. "I've gotta go. But it was nice meeting you. You were amazing." She giggled and glanced at him one last time before going into the club.
###
As soon as Isabelle took off towards Jon, Simon walked quickly towards Clary and Jace. They were dancing, lost in their own world, and Simon hated to break their romantic trance. But he had a bad feeling about Jonathon being there. Somehow, he suspected that he wasn't there to snag some girls. Simon glanced at Izzy. She was sitting on something―was that his leg?―and talking to Jon. He swallowed the anger that formed in his chest and marched toward his best friend.
"Clary?" he said as soon as he was standing in front of her. Clary stopped dancing, her mouth open as if she was gonna say something.
"What do you want, Lewis?" snapped Jace, but Simon managed to ignore it.
"What is it?" Clary asked softly, gently, and he hated himself for having to ruin her night, for having to tell her―but he had to. Otherwise, the night would turn out to be far, far worse.
"Jonathan―he's here," Simon replied.
Her mouth was open wide. Then she shut it. Her expression clouded.
It was Jace who spoke next. "Who's Jonathan?"
Clary took a deep, trembling breath. "Jonathan is my brother."
There were moments of silence. Moments that kept going on forever. Simon realized how silent it was, considering they were in the loudest club he'd ever been to. (And the only one, not that it mattered.)
He started noticing the little things. People dancing around them. The song playing. He focused on the song.
Am I moving too fast?
Am I thinking too slow?
I just want to know.
So I took all night to write this stupid love letter to you,
Yeah you, from me, to you,
And all the time that I wasted on this stupid love letter to you,
Fuck you, from me, to you.
Simon decided that it was best not to concentrate on the song. It was way too depressing. And heartbreaking. And it reminded him of his only ex-girlfriend. It reminded him also of when he first met Clary. Of when he first loved her. And of when he first got his heart broken and realized Clary had a boyfriend, and it wasn't him, and she didn't have the slightest idea that her best friend might've liked her.
Another song came on. He recognized it as one of Clary's favorites.
Life's too short to even care, whoa,
Losing my mind, losing my mind, losing control,
These fishes in the sea, they're staring at me,
Whoa, whoa,
A wet world aches for a beat of a drum, whoa.
If I could find a way to see this straight,
I'd run away to some fortune,
That I should have found by now.
Life's too short to even care, whoa,
Coming up now, coming up now, out of the blue,
These zombies in the park they're looking for my heart, whoa, whoa,
The dark world aches for a splash of the sun, whoa
If I could find a way to see this straight,
I'd run away to some fortune,
That I should have found by now,
And so I run out to the things they said could restore me,
Restore life the way it should be,
Waiting for this cough syrup to come down.
Simon never knew why she liked it. She'd had an obsession with it ever since the last school year had ended, and now, when he saw her face, he knew it hadn't changed. But now he could see why. He knew that the song dealt about a person whose life had gotten so dark and so confusing that he or she wanted to go back to how it was. Clary wanted the same thing, but she didn't know how to. With her parents, with her boyfriend, or with anything. That, right there, was why Clary liked the song. He almost felt proud to figure it out, but then was snapped out of his reverie when he remembered that Jonathan was here.
"Jonathan," Simon reminded her. "He has to be here for a reason, and I suspect it isn't a good one. We have to call your mom, Clary. We have to get out of L.A now." He urged her to listen.
"I can't, Si," she said, her voice a bit helpless. "I need to see him. I need to see my brother."
She sounded as if she was about to cry.
"Clary," Simon said, pulling her into a hug. "Clary, listen. I know you want to see your brother. I know you do. But you can't. Your mom has been trying hard to keep you from him for a reason. And if you see him―what if he takes you away? Back to your dad?"
"The Jon I remember wouldn't dare." But she knew as well as Simon did that the Jon she knew was long gone.
"Clary, please. Come on. I've got Izzy trying to distract him, and it isn't very pretty. Please," he begged.
"Can someone," said Jace, "please tell me what the hell is going on?"
"Her brother," Simon said, pointing at Clary, "is an asshole who has been with her dad―not in that way, Wayland, I see where this is going―but anyway, he's been with her dad. And her dad is the reason Jocelyn, her mom, has been moving her around everywhere."
"And you're convinced he means danger," Jace said. He didn't wait for Simon to nod his head. He turned to Clary and said, "Babe, we need to go," in the gentlest way he could.
"No." She shook her head. Simon rolled his eyes. She was so damn stubborn. "I want to speak to him."
The problem? When Simon turned to look at where Izzy was, she was gone.
"Crap," he said, taking his phone out. "Right. Hold on." He called Isabelle. She didn't answer.
"There's Izzy," said Clary. Sure enough, she was headed their way. Simon realized that she must've thought they were distracted. She looked confused for a second, and then her eyes widened as she realized that he wasn't done warning Clary. They weren't safe, and Jonathan was still here.
###
Clary didn't know what to do.
There was the whole, "Hey, your brother's here, so we have to leave," issue. She didn't want to leave his brother. She had so many questions, and he had so, so many answers. Answers she needed. She craved them. She'd been hiding her whole life, and she didn't wanna do it anymore. She wanted out. Not just out of hiding, but out of the whole family shit. Since when was her mother going to realize that she needed her own life? She wanted to love her father, too. She wanted to know him, and her brother.
"Clary," said Simon impatiently, "we have to go. Come on." His voice was quiet, a harsh whisper, yet she couldn't make herself leave. Her feet wouldn't move and her eyes were glued to that door.
"Clary." This time, Jace was speaking. He was tugging at her hand. "Come on, babe, we have to leave."
"She won't leave," Simon muttered. "Un-fucking-believable. Will someone just please slap some sense into her?"
"I've got it," Isabelle said brightly. "Simon, go find Alec and Magnus. Jace, you stay at a distance."
"Izzy," Clary said, shaking her head, her curls bouncing as the boys complied. "Look, I'm not leaving. I've been running, Iz, my whole life I've been running, and he has answers. I need answers."
"Clary, I know you do. And you'll get them, I promise. Just please not like this. I just spent ten minutes with the dude, Clary, and he's not―" Isabelle took a deep breath "―he's not the kind of brother you want to have.
Clary felt her heart constrict at Izzy's words. He's not the kind of brother you want to have. She didn't care. She wanted his brother, yes, but she also wanted answers, the kind that only he would give her.
"Izzy," she said, frustrated. "Look, here's the thing: I know he isn't perfect. He's far from it. But he's my brother, and I'm his sister, and I need answers or I just―I don't know what I'm gonna do. Hell, I don't know what I'm doing right now, but I just need to see him and ask him what the hell is going on." Clary took a deep, shuddering breath, trying to keep the tears from falling down her bright green eyes.
"I get it," Isabelle said quietly. "I do. I know how hard it is to run away from answers, from things you've always wanted―but you have to, Clary. You have to, because if you don't, you don't know what'll happen. And I don't wanna find out what will happen."
Clary sighed. "Izzy, I just can't. I have to."
"I'll talk to your mom. If she refuses, we'll search her office. Call police. I know a guy. But come on," she pleaded, "you can't go to your brother."
Clary thought about it long and hard. If she went with her brother, there was a chance that he might've turned out to be like Izzy described him, and she just couldn't risk it. She couldn't risk her brother hurting her even more than necessary. She could not risk anything. But at the same time, she wanted answers. She needed them. She needed to know why she'd been running for so long. What was so terrible?
"Fine," she said with a defeated sigh. "But I am so, so mad at you."
"Don't worry. I bet Jace is up to those ten rounds," Izzy said, winked, and called Simon. She told him Clary had accepted to leave, and he said he'd meet them at the car with Alec and Magnus.
The girls walked toward where Jace stood, leaning against a wall. "Hey," he said to Clary. He gave her a kiss and pulled her close to him. Her arms were around his waist, and his arm around her neck. "I'm glad you didn't stay."
She said nothing, just tightened her grip on his waist and waited for the walk to be over. Just let it be over, I won't have to think about it, won't have time to regret it―
A hand yanked her backwards, and she lost her grip on Jace and her sight on Isabelle. A hand, probably the same one, put a cloth over her mouth. Clary twisted and kicked and flailed her arms, but it was useless. The cloth smelled funny, and she couldn't quite remember what it was, but she knew that it couldn't be good. Too soon, the world turned black, and she fell into the darkness.
###
Jace couldn't believe that she'd come so quickly.
She was a girl, to his surprise. Not a boy. But she was very skilled―for a girl. Sadly, Jace was also very drunk, and Isabelle was no better. So it was no surprise that, in the end, the girl was gone with Clary, and now Jace and Isabelle were lying on the floor, speechless, too stunned to utter a word.
She had black hair under the hoodie. He couldn't tell the color of her eyes. She was small, but still bigger than Clary. She came out of the shadows. She seemed to blend in.
He still didn't know her.
And he hated himself for letting Clary go.
Jace just stared like an idiot, his nose bleeding and his sides aching, as his girlfriend was taken away, and he didn't do a damn thing to stop it. He was so full of self-hatred at that moment.
"Hey," Izzy said softly by his side. He wouldn't look at her. "Jace, listen. You did everything you could. And if you dare argue with me, I will run you over with my car."
"It's not your car," he replied matter-of-factly, and she snorted.
"Might as well be." She stood up. "Look, we've been out for a while. I know it may not seem like it, but there's a huge chunk of my memory that's missing."
"No there isn't," Jace said to her with a scowl. "Stop trying to make me feel better. I let that bitch take Clary. I did. Not you."
"Shut up and think, you moron," Isabelle snapped. "I know you. They put on us what they put on her."
Before Jace could utter another word, he saw Simon walking their way with Alec and Magnus. He took a deep breath. What was he gonna tell them? Simon was gonna kill him. Shit.
"They took her," Isabelle said, her voice shaky. "We tried, I swear we tried, but they gave us this thing and then we woke up and we only remember seeing her leave with Clary." She looked as close to tears as Izzy had ever looked in public.
"What?" Simon's eyes were blazing with fury. "So, hold on. They took Clary?"
"Yes," she said, and then she buried her face in his neck and he wrapped his arms around her. Jace stared at them, not knowing what to do. Clary was gone. She was gone. He had to find her, and he knew it.
"We have to find her," said Alec, before Jace could. "They couldn't have gone far. You were out for, like, two minutes."
"We can't find her!" Jace exclaimed, furious. "It's up to her mother."
Three pair of eyes stared at Jace curiously, obviously not knowing what the hell he was talking about. Simon, however, caught on for a bit.
"You have to tell us," he said to Jace. "And then we have to get Clary back."
Jace took a deep breath and told them everything. He told them about the letter they'd gotten, and he could see Simon piecing everything together. Of course he knew. Simon provided some extra information, and together, they pieced it together.
"It's decided, then," Isabelle said.
Jace nodded. "We have to go talk to Jocelyn."
