Sorry it took so long to post this chapter. I was trying to get things ready for the semester. Now that the semester has actually started I will be slower with updates. On the first day of MWF classes I received 2 assignments one which is due tomorrow.
I sit curled in a chair before the fire a mug of tea in my hand. I watch him pace back and forth. I pull my thin robe closer around me, the fire hasn't been going long enough to chase the chill from the room yet. I wait for him to speak, but I know it was another nightmare that drove him to my door tonight. I first found out about them while we were in the Deeproads. It's hard to hide secrets in a camp, especially when everyone huddled together to be close to the light of a fire.
Even after I found out he still tried to hide it, but after a few nights I finally got him to talk to me about it. He told me that can never remember his nightmares, just the feelings associated with them.
It must be awful to be plagued by nightmares, but have no memory of them. To wake in the clutches of fear, gasping for breath, and drenched in sweat. To feel abject terror, but not knowing the cause. How can you ever hope to move past something if you don't know what it is?
He finally stops and sits on the floor, staring at the fire. I walk over and sit next to him.
"Here." I press the mug into his hand. "It's a herbal tea. It will help to relax you."
He cautiously sniffs it and looks up at me. "Mint?"
I nod and watch as he takes a small sip. He makes a pleased sound and looks at me.
"You know a lot about herbs and potions for a Rogue."
I smile. "Yes well I grew up in Ferelden, our family constantly moving. There were many times we stayed in the woods. It's good to know which plants are edible and which are poisonous. Which ones are rare, and can be sold for a tidy profit. Of course it helps to be able to make your own potions if you don't have easy access to shops. Of course having Mages in the family helps as well."
"You learned from your Father then?"
"Yes he wanted us to be able to fend for ourselves should we ever have to. He taught all of us about traps, herbs, potions, and he began our instruction in swords."
"Why would a Mage know about swords and traps?"
"I asked him the same thing once. He told me- 'What would happen if I ran out of Mana? Why then I'd be defenseless, but not if I have other means of protection. Traps are useful for protection and trying to escape if I'm overwhelmed by the enemy'."
"He sounds like he was a wise man."
"He was. I think you would have liked each other, well except for the Mage bit." I smile.
"Would you tell me more about him?"
I nod and take a moment to gather my thoughts. "He was my hero and I was always terribly upset that I couldn't cast spells just like he did. Then he started teaching me things I could learn and I saw that really he didn't rely on magic much. He used it if the need arose, but… Well I think he thought it was safer to only use it if necessary. It drew less attention, if he only drew a sword. After a while he even stopped carrying a staff. It wasn't until Bethany started showing signs of magic that he started concentrating on his magic again. That's when we moved the first time. Then we were constantly moving until she could control her magic better…"
I break off and feel guilt. My words sounding bitter, like I blame her. I don't anymore, not now that I understand what we were running from. I shake my head and he watches me curiously.
"He was wise, though he did have a habit of rushing into things. He was kind always trying to help people. He hated sitting still. He was strong, loyal, and protective of us. Of course he had a wonderful sense of humor that got him into trouble more than once."
He smiles. "You sound just like him. Do you look like him as well? You just don't bear much resemblance to your Mother and Sister."
"Yes well I had to get the red hair, green eyes, and pale skin from somewhere right? I've often been told that I'm almost exactly like him. Well except of course not being a Mage and the whole female business. Except of course for Mother who thinks I'm not female enough."
He snorts. "Then clearly she's not looking too hard."
"I wouldn't suggest telling her that. I got my temper from her."
He raises an eyebrow. "What temper?"
"Exactly. Those who manage to invoke my wrath don't live to tell about it." I smile sweetly.
"I'll keep that in mind then."
We lapse into a comfortable silence. As he finishes his tea his eyelids start to droop. He jumps when I reach over and take the mug so he doesn't drop it. I laugh and reach over and pull a blanket out of one of the chairs.
"You should try to get some sleep. I'll keep the monsters at bay."
He looks like he's going to refuse, but he just nods. I gently pull him down so his head rests in my lap. I cover him with the blanket. His body is rigid at first, but then he relaxes. I breathe a sigh of relief and am utterly content to be holding him like this.
"Comfy?" I ask softly.
He turns his head to look up at me. "Very. Did your Father say that to you about the monsters?"
"He'd say that whenever I had nightmares. Then he'd tell me a story so I could go back to sleep. He had a comforting voice and I knew I was safe as long as he was there."
He looks back into the fire, but his hand slips into mine. "I like your voice…would you tell me a story?"
"Of course." I clear my throat. He still hears the emotion in it and gently squeezes my hand.
I begin my favorite story that Father would tell me, one about a Warrior-Princess and her Knight. I continue even after he drifts off to sleep. After I'm finished I watch him sleep. He looks so peaceful. All the hardness gone from him, he almost looks fragile.
I lean over and gently kiss his forehead and his hand squeezes mine in his sleep. My heart seizes at the love I feel for this man. I'm so glad that I can provide him some comfort. I want nothing more than to take his pain away. So he always looks this peaceful.
Title from the song "Hold You In My Arms" Ray LaMontagne.
