A Promise to be Better 17

Author: Raven Dancer

disclaimer: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling except for the Drs. Barnes and Beryl. I receive no monetary compensation for these works.

Summary: Snape worries about Snuffles' return.

Sirius Black arrived within the week, loping up the stairs of the castle in search of Professor Lupin. The school population was at lunch and the sight of the large black dog walking into the great hall barely caused a ripple.

Harry was thrilled, petting the animal as it licked him thoroughly. Then swiped his sandwich. With happy laughter several Gryffindors fed sandwiches to the dog.

At the staff table Dumbledore smiled warmly. Snape watched the older man's eyes sparkled. Truly pleased to have Black back at Hogwarts. Of course. The dream team, Snape thought uncomfortably. Yes, there were only two of them left, but James Potter lived on in his son. His young friends would easily fit into the old group.

Setting down his napkin, his stomach revolting against the little he'd already eaten, Snape folded his arms tightly against his torso. Lupin, who'd watched Black's return, saw Dumbledore's response then glanced at his right at Snape.

Not good. He forgot about that, the hatred between the two men.

"Severus? Are you ok?" he asked gently, his hand brushed against Snape's shoulder as he leaned closer. Snape's gaze jerked to Lupin, his eyes a little too wide at first, then they focused.

"I expect so. Stomach seems a bit off, though," the Potions Master replied.

"I understand, Severus. Don't worry, I'll keep a very close eye on that dog of mine," Lupin promised as he poured out more tea.

"Thank you. I don't know how well I'll tolerate a dog right now. That one in particular never liked me much," Snape admitted. "Not that I ever treated him especially well."

Lupin sized Snape up. That was as close to Snape admitting culpability in the feud that sprung up between them years before. "If I recall, none of us were particularly laudable. The only difference was Gryffindor was favored and you weren't.

This caused Snape to start, staring at Lupin in amazement.

"Of course, Severus, I understand it now, twenty years later. At the time I didn't. For what it's worÄth, I'm very sorry about hurting you back then, no matter what the reason," Lupin left his hand on Snape's shoulder, feeling the turmoil roiling inside. Snape finally released himself, lifted his hand to touch Lupin's.

"Thank you, it means a great deal to me. I'm also sorry I hurt you and your friends. I just didn't know any other way to handle the situation then," the Potions Master admitted.

A low growl caught their attention and glancing back both saw 'the dog'.

"Hullo, Snuffles," Lupin said affectionately, petting his head.

"Hello, Snuffles," Snape managed to get out with some sincerity. If Lupin was apologizing and willing to forgive, then perhaps Black, too had grown up some. They would never be friends, but Snape imagined they could work well enough together in the war ahead. He picked up his tea to sip.

Snuffles chose that time to nose between the two wizards and the hot tea spilled down Snape's robes. A couple staff caught the gaffe and laughed.

"Smart pooch, timed that well!" snorted Vector.

"Remind me not to invite you and your dog to tea, Lupin," teased Flitwick.

Lupin immediately cast a cooling charm and then dried the robe with a second charm.

"Bad Snuffles!" he admonished the dog, who was doing his level best to look remorseful. Snape merely looked at the dog with great distrust. Lupin had changed, but had Black?

"An accident, Snuffles?" Dumbledore voice broke in, once more smoothing over the action of the Gryffindor. Snape sighed softly and accepted a fresh cup of tea and apologetical smile from Lupin.

"I'll take your dog with me, Professor Lupin, for the afternoon. Come collect him after your last class," the Headmaster said amiable, tuggiûng on the dog's collar. Lolling his tongue in a toothy smile, Snuffles followed Dumbledore.

"I'm sorry, Severus. I will talk with him. I can't believe he'd actually have spilled the tea on purpose," he sipped his own tea a moment. "Then again, I can." he admitted.

"It's ok, Remus. I will work very hard to get along with your pet. I may not come up as often, though. He's a dog and needs access to the grounds," Snape said quietly, condemning himself to the lower levels.

"He'll be out and about, but you need to get to the Headmaster freely. I doubt very much he'll be in with Dumbledore often, possibly once a day to touch base at the most," Lupin whispered back.

Snape hid in his offices after classes, not returning to the Headmaster's offices as he had done each afternoon after teaching. He was suppose to; Barnes did not want him to be alone for the time being. But the possibility of èhaving to see Black was enough for the Potions Master to stay downstairs; he reorganized his supply cupboard for the afternoon.

He'd just finished dusting off the tiger shark teeth when there was a knock at the door. Probably the Headmaster, he thought. He opened the door to Dr. Barnes.

"So, Severus, doing some cleaning, I see," the Healer smiled and entered the office noting the cloth in his hand.

"I haven't gone through my supplies for quite a while," Snape said quietly.

"No, you haven't," Barnes agreed, looking at the dirty cloths tossed aside for the house elves. "Do you want some help?" he asked.

Snape was slightly surprised. He had expected to be chastised for not going upstairs. But Barnes moved across the room and picked up a cloth. Together they finished cleaning the section Snape was on.

"You have a good stock of ingredients, Severus," Barnes remarked.

"I keep a loth of nonperishable items on hand. Some of the advanced students come up with interesting ideas for potions," the wizard replied.

"Now, why don't we talk about why you're still down here in the dungeons and not up with the Headmaster, where you should be," the Healer smiled brightly, taking all the dirty cloths and adding them to the pile in the corner.

"I needed to clean," Snape said weakly.

"Of course. Then Black's being here had no bearing on it?" Barnes tended to go to the heart of the matter. Snape turned away, pretending to be interested in a bottle of dried gecko.

Barnes waited. They'd talked now for over a month, often enough for him to know when to wait and when to push. Snape set the bottle down.

"I'm not sure how I feel about Black being here," Snape said very quietly.

"Brings back some unpleasant memories?" the Healer suggestively asked.

"Yes," soft reply.

"Tell me," Barnes asked, not moving. He wondered how long until the wizard answered.

Snape stood still, then moved to the chairs near the hearth. The Healer carefully tooled his face so as not to smile. Snape was moving to a position of safety; he'd sit, Barnes would sit and then they'd lean closer together, the wizard would whisper secrets from his past. Safe yet very vulnerable.

Barnes followed quietly and was almost surprised when Snape reached for his hand. Another small concession of extreme vulnerability. The Healer had noted that as the physical torture from Voldemort continued, Snape's need for comfort had increased tenfold. His father had suggested the extreme pain had removed the emotional blocks.

Of course, only Barnes and Dumbledore saw this side of Snape. He was very careful not seek help in any shape or form õin a public setting. Although some people had noticed. Lupin first and foremost. Then the staff at the meeting the previous week. And Trelawney; couldn't discount that witch's ability to read the people around her. All those that had noticed kept it to themselves. No new rumors had sprung up.

"I saw how Albus looked, when Black came in. All the memories on his face, Jeffrey. He loved those Gryffindors more than anything else. Now he has the old marauders together again, Black, Lupin and Potter," Snape said softly, not looking at Barnes at all.

"Yes, in a sense, they are back Severus. But it's different now. James is dead. Lupin and Black have grown older just as you have," the Healer offered.

"It's different and it's the same all over. When the tea spilled it was 'just an accident," Snape trembled a bit, trying not to whine.

"You think he did it on purpose?" Barnes asked. Snape was very quiet. "Severus, did he spill it on purpose?"

"I don't know," the Potions Master started then hardened, "yes, I think he did it on purpose."

"Why?" Barnes followed up quickly.

"Just to tease me, make me look stupid. That's mostly what Black and Potter did back in school. If I retaliated I usually got in trouble. Always the comparison between the silly pranks and my evil harassment," Snape flushed in remembered anger.

"I understand, Severus," Barnes said simply, sending a small warmth of energy. "Do you know even Albus said he'd been unfair to you? It was very unfair."

Snape looked up into the Healer's eyes. "Albus said he'd been unfair?"

"Yes, Severus. He did," Barnes let the information settle on the Potions Master.

"It just brought back all those memories, when he spilled the tea," Snape said. Barnes continued to send a thin stream of warmth through the wizard.

"Severus, I know you're very worried about this. Just remember Albus will try to be fair. Try to understand he's human, though. Black has gone through a lot, between Azkaban and all. The Headmaster will be sympathetic to him, too. Black deserves a sympathetic ear. If you get angry, feel you can't talk with Albus for any reason, call me. See me. I'm going to be right there for you no matter what, ok?" Barnes gained eye contact.

"You won't be seeing Black, too, will you?" the wizard asked.

"No, I won't. You're my patient. I'll take care of you. If Black needs some type of help Albus can arrange it with my father," Barnes promised. For the Healer it was not an idle promise. He would not work with Black. Snape was his first concern.

"I feel a little silly, like asking you to take sides when there's no sides to take," Snape admitted.

"That's ok, Severus," Barnes sent more healing warmth into the wizard, letting him settle in the chair and calm down.

A movement at the door caught the Healer's eye. The Headmaster came in quietly.

"Well, Severus, I was wondering where you'd gone to. I realized after slogging through the afternoon owls you hadn't claimed your spot on the couch," the Headmaster put his hands on Snape's shoulders gently rubbing at the lessening tension.

"I was cleaning my supplies area," the Potions Master said quietly.

Dumbledore looked over the shelves; mostly dusted and straightened. At least he'd kept busy.

"Ah. Good. Let's wash for dinner. You can come up after with me and read," the Headmaster replied. He waited until Snape stood up and pulled him into a hug. The wizard responded, hugging back.

"Dinner. The house elves have been busy," Dumbledore said, releasing his friend.

As Barnes stood he thought he saw movement again at the door, a dark shadow darting by. But when they walked out there was nothing to be seen. Must have been a trick of the torch light. Or Peeves. Discarding the thought Barnes followed the two wizards up to dinner.