I burst out of the house and frantically look around. I see him turning the corner to head towards his house. A hint of blue flickers around his hands. It's so faint I barely see it. His entire body is stiff.

"Fenris," I call and run after him.

We're at his house before I finally catch up. The blue is stranger and his hands are unsteady ad he unlocks the door. He walks in and I follow.

As soon as I pull the door shut the blue flares up. Engulfing his entire body. It takes everything I have not to back away. Instead I take a breath and walk towards him. I slowly reach out and place my hand on his cheek.

"Fenris…"

Then I'm slammed into the wall. His hands locked around my arms and pinning mew there. His angry eyes boring into mine.

"I'm not the help. I'm not a slave, not anymore," he spits out.

I force my body to stay calm. To not fight against him.

"I don't think that. You are a free man Fenris. I'll defend you against anyone who thinks otherwise. I'll protect you against anyone who tries to make it otherwise. I…care about you."

I look at him and hope my sincerity is clear. His gaze softens and so does the blue. His grip loosens, but his hands stay on my arms.

"I don't think of you as the help or a slave. You know that right?"

"No. Not really. She just…she's right. The nobles will talk and you deserve better than that. You deserve to have a life where people…"

I growl. "First off she's one to talk she was engaged and ran away with another man. A Mage for that matter. Second, I don't give two bloody blighted sovereigns what they think. They can go screw themselves. I'll march out there right now and kiss you in the middle of Hightown. And if they have a problem with it they can just…"

He kisses me. I feel his lips smile against mine. His body finally relaxes and he wraps his arms around me. I sigh happily. When he pulls back I smile at the look in his eyes. A look full of amusement.

"Better?" He asks teasingly. I nod. "What about your sister?" His happy look fades slightly.

"This won't affect her. The blighted Templars don't care what I do." He snorts. "Alright they don't care what I do personally."

"They would if I were a Mage."

A surprised laugh slips out. "Did you just make a joke? Not only that a joke about being a Mage? This is truly a day for the ages. I'll have to tell Varric. He'll write a ballad and mark it in the official calendar."

He rolls his eyes at me. I cup his cheek. He leans into my hand and kisses my palm. I bite my lip. I told him I care for him, but I want to confess my feelings. I want to be his and he mine. I don't want him to doubt.

"What is it?" He whispers against my palm.

I collect my thoughts and look at him seriously. "Before I called you a friend…but well I don't think of you like that. You're more to me than that. I want more. If you'll give it." I feel the blush creep into my cheeks and look down. I peek at him from beneath my lashes.

He's smiling that smile. The one that makes my knees go weak. The one that's rare and I've never seen directed at anyone else. His real smile. "For me it's you Audrey. You and no one else."

The use of my name increases my blush. Inexplicably I giggle.

"I too have a confession of sorts."

"I knew it you really do dance around your mansion."

"Oh yes. I choreograph fantastic dance routines. I should show you sometime."

We laugh. I don't say anything; just wait for him to continue.

"This…our relationship is serious now. What typically comes next, more intimate things. I haven't ever…" He trails off. A blush on his cheeks and the tips of his ears.

I feel my mouth form into a small oh. But before he was so…until the couch. That uncertain look when he was on top of me. That was because he hasn't had sex.

"I know what happens. I just haven't has any…"

"Practical experience." I supply.

He nods, the blush deepening. I'm still not sure what to say. So I lean forward and gently kiss his lips.

"Have you?" He asks almost shyly.

I stiffen and pull away. Today was such a good day too, well aside from Mother. "Not when it mattered."

"What do you mean?"

"Can we sit?"

He nods. We head up the stairs, his arm about my hips. He sits to work making a fire. I sit in one of the chairs. I cross my arms on the table and pick at a loose string on my sleeve. When the fire is going he comes and sits across from me.

He reaches across the table and takes my hand. He offers me a small smile. "It can't be worse than mine."

"It is." I whisper. "I've told you we often had to move to protect Father and Bethany."

He nods.

"Well sometimes the Templar took notice of something. Some little slip up. They'd come sniffing around looking for proof or to threaten us…or to get something."

His hand tightens around mine. I know he can see where this is going. I look at him and he nods for me to continue.

"The first time Bethany was ten. She was just starting to come into her magic. She could barely control it. When fire or sparks flew from her fingers she always jumped, even if she cast the spell on purpose. She'd look at me with big eyes, never sure whether to be excited or terrified."

I swallow and look at our clasped hands.

"I was fifteen. Father was off in the woods teaching Bethany to control her magic. Carver went with them to practice with his sword. Mother was at the market. I was still home taking care of a few chores before I went to practice with Father and the twins. I was in the garden when I looked up. My heart stopped when I saw the Templar heading towards me. He said he knew about our situation, but he'd look the other way if I stepped into the barn with him. I did. After he left I sat there in shock. Mother walked in and sat her basket down. She pulled me up and straightened my dress. Then she said I did what I had to. She patted my shoulder and walked into the house with her basket. Then I knew she was there. She heard and didn't do anything. She could have stopped it, but she didn't. Not so long as I protected her precious Bethany."

I choke off a sob. Looking anywhere, but at him.

"I didn't mean that. I love my sister. I do. I'd do anything for her."

"You did."

I shrug and look at my white knuckled grip on his hand.

"I stayed in the barn crying until Father and the twins came home. Carver found me. He took one look at me and ran to get Father. He healed me, though there wasn't much to heal really. The Templar was quite gentle. He even kissed me goodbye." I say with a bitter laugh. "Carver snuck in the barn with Father and when he heard he ran over. He dropped to his knees beside me and promised he wouldn't let anyone touch me again. A ten year old boy with a sword about as big as he was, that made it his mission to torment me…promising to protect me while my own Mother… Damn I miss them." I stand up and start pacing. "Bethany never found out. I begged them not to tell her. I didn't want her to feel guilty."

He clears his throat. "How many times?"

"Several times with that Templar. I had to keep it up until we could leave. Then there were three after him. Well three that I actually…" I trail off.

I keep pacing and when I near his chair again he grabs me and pulls me into his lap. His arms strong around me, lending support. I curl into him. My fingers idly worrying the metal of his armor.

"That's what she really meant you know. About finding me a husband I mean. She just wants to marry me off to some noble…"

"To be used. How can she treat you like that? You're her daughter. Family."

"It's always been like this. It got worse after Father died. She never let him see. After the first time he took me in the house. Carver walking along beside us. She played the concerned Mother all worrying and frantic. I flinched from her touch."

We don't say anything for a while. He just holds me. His hand idly stroking my back.

"That's why she meant after Bethany was taken to the Circle. If I had been there I could have taken him off into an ally for a quick tumble. I got back while they were still there. I still could have. I couldn't though. I finally had a new life. A fresh start. All I wanted was to let those memories fade away. I wanted to be a girl again not a tool. I hate what I did."

"I hate that you felt like you had to. Like you were alone. That the people you should have been able to trust weren't there to help. That she pushed you into it."

It's then I notice he's shaking. I look up and see his eyes. They're filled with anger, but also with understanding. They soften a bit when he looks at me.

"It seems we were both used," he says in a quiet voice.

"We just have to keep holding on. Keep fighting so we don't end up like that again."

"True, but now we can hold on to each other."

His lips meet mine and for once I don't feel alone.


It's pretty clear by now that I really dislike Leandra. I didn't mind her at first, but about my third play-through I really started to dislike her.

The name Audrey means Noble Strength. I thought it suited her.

Title from the song "I'll Keep Holding On" by Simply Red.