Ciel Phantomhive awoke to the sound of murmured voices, his head aching. He kept his eyes closed and listened what they were saying, trying to discern his surroundings.

"—just a boy? Off of the street?"

"Yes, Doctor. Apparently he jumped from one of the apartment buildings. Or was pushed. We're not sure yet."

"Hm. I see. Is he a street urchin?"

"I'm not sure. You'd think he was, something like this having happened to him, but he has these two rings that look expensive and seem to have a family crest of some sort. It's hard to tell; they're covered in dirt from his fall."

A pause where Ciel could imagine the doctor nodding thoughtfully. He decided that he need imagine no more; he was sure he was in a hospital. The sterile smell of antiseptic and the fact that the man in his room was a doctor confirmed as much.

He opened his eyes. Or rather one large, ice-blue eye. He found that he couldn't open his other one and his hand flew to it in a panic. It was covered in what felt like a heavy swath of bandages.

The doctor and the other voice—a young woman who was presumably a nurse, Ciel now saw—turned and saw the fact that he was conscious. The doctor shot a glance at the nurse and then, with a barely perceptible nod, turned and left the room.

The nurse smiled gently and walked over to Ciel, leaning down to peer intently into his face. "Are you alright, young man?"

Ciel stared at her with his good eye, taking in her long, tumbling blond hair, lovely, gentle emerald eyes and gorgeous, model-like body. He felt a strange sensation that started in his stomach and wormed its way through his body. It started as a slight tingle but by the time it had spread completely, it felt as if someone had injected his veins with fire.

His face contorted in pain and he leaned over the side of the bed, dry heaving. The sensation was awful. It was like starving, becoming dehydrated, drowning and desperately wishing for air… it was this terrible, horrible need for something and all he knew was that it had something to do with the nurse.

"Please… please leave."

His voice came out ragged and harsh, his breath came out jagged. The nurse, whose eyes had widened in concern, leaned over and began to rub his back gently, patting it and murmuring things like "There, there" and "It's going to be okay."

Ciel flinched away from her hand and stared up at her with a discernible expression, one that made the nurse take an unconscious step back and suddenly feel slightly nervous.

"Um. Uh. Well. I'm sorry. Do you think you could tell me the name of your parents so I could call them and let them know you're alright, young man? Oh, and your name too."

Ciel blinked, his whole body feeling hot. Her voice sounded like it had come from far away, like it was muffled somehow by this violent, painful need. He slowly shook his head and swallowed thickly, leaning back against his pillow.

"What's wrong? Do you not have any parents?"

He looked at her as if he didn't quite understand, and then he spoke in the same ragged, harsh voice he'd used before.

"Can't… remember."

She looked surprised, then shook her head and hurried out of the room, probably to find the doctor. Ciel closed his one eye again, feeling the need subside a little now that the woman was gone from the room. He took a deep breath, trying to clear his head, but his chest felt tight and his head still ached. He settled himself as comfortably as he could on the pillow. After only a couple of moments, he was asleep.


Ciel awoke to the feel of a cool hand on his forehead and gazed up sleepily at the man he recognized as the doctor from before. The man drew his hand back and scribbled down on a chart, nodding and mumbling. He was tall, slim and serious-looking with light brown hair and glasses.

"What… what's wrong with me?"

Ciel swallowed a wave of nausea and pushed himself up on his elbows, fixing the doctor with a pleading one-eyed stare.

The doctor barely glanced up, flicking through his charts and speaking in a bored voice.

"You're lucky, boy. You fell from the top of quite a high building. The only thing that saved your life was a tree that got in your road. It scratched your eye quite horribly though, hence the bandages over your eye. Your vision will be gone unless we do a surgery; in which case it will be light-sensitive for a time and you will have to wear a patch over it for…"

The doctor flipped back to the front of his chart and finally looked up at Ciel.

"About a month. And besides that you have a severe concussion, which is why your memories are gone. Other symptoms include dizziness, headaches, fatigue, anxiety and blah blah blah. The doctor yawned and let out an annoyed sigh, muttering something about bratty street kids who got themselves into trouble.

Well that explained the headache and memory problems but… Ciel decided not to ask the doctor about the need, figuring that "fire in veins" may make him seem a little crazy.

"How long before my memory comes back?"

The doctor turned and strode out of the room, not even pausing as he called over his shoulder, "A month or two."

Ciel exhaled noisily in anger and then lay back and fell asleep.


The third time he woke up in the hospital, the nurse was back and so was his need. But he looked away from her, tight lipped and didn't say a word.

For two days he lay in the hospital bed and stifled the need, trying to remember something—anything—that he could. And he did remember something. One small thing. But it made him feel better anyways. He remembered a voice—it seemed so familiar to him—calling out a word: "Ciel." Or maybe a name? Was it his name? He pondered and could find no answer in his memories, but felt right. So Ciel it was.

On the third day, the doctor came in and told him it was time for surgery and would he please sign these papers? He did, knowing full well that it was illegal to operate on a child without parental consent, but it was obvious that the doctor thought he was just taking up another bed.

The surgery went without a hitch and the next and final time he woke up in a hospital Ciel was back to normal save the need and a black eye patch over his right eye, which was not to be taken off for a month.


Because his head was finally clear, Ciel realized what it was that he wanted from the nurse. What the need was. And the last day he was in the hospital, the night before the doctor was to kick him onto the streets to fend for himself, he made sure to satiate that need.

He arose from his bed quietly, small feet slapping softly on the floor as he left the room he was told never to leave unless a nurse was present. He quickly slipped from room to room, glancing inside and then moving on. Finally, he spied what he was looking for in one of the rooms; a room full of sterilized medical instruments.

He reached out and grabbed something, wishing that the damn hospital gown had sleeves to hide it in, and made his way out of the room. He walked back to his own room and pressed the button that called the nurse then sat on the bed, waiting, the thing he'd picked up concealed in his hand under the pillow.

She was there in a few seconds, looking frazzled and worried.

"Young man, are you alright?"

For the first time since he'd seen her, he smiled at her. It took a lot of effort to smile past the haze of need but he managed it. Her eyes widened in shock and then she gave him a huge, happy smile back.

"What is it, dear? Have you remembered something?"

He kept the same smile up, feeling the need rise even further with her kind words—so much that he almost gasped out—and beckoned her over to come closer. She walked over slowly, the happy smile at his reaching out to her still on her lips, and knelt down so they were face to face.

"Yes?"

He reached out with one hand and cupped her behind the head, leaning forward closer… closer… closer… right past her face to her ear, where he whispered one word into her ear.

He leaned back and laughed under his breath. She still smiled, though it was a puzzled smile. "For what?"

In one smooth motion his hand came out from under the pillow with the object he'd been holding. She only had time to widen her eyes a fraction before Ciel buried the scalpel he'd picked up into her throat with one hand and covered her mouth with the other.

She barely even struggled as she bled out all over his hands and slumped to the side. Ciel got off the bed and gently lowered her to the floor, then he let go of her and the scalpel and looked at his hands. They were stained with thick, frothy, bright red blood.

He brought them up to his face and for a second, it seemed that he grimaced. But no, it was only a grin so wide that it almost split his face and he threw back his head and laughed in delight. He wiped his brow, which had seemed to be sweating the whole week with a horrid need, and smeared the blood all over his face. He didn't care. He was free—the need was gone! His veins were no longer filled with fire… in fact; they were filled with an intense pleasure that was almost sexual in nature.

He laughed for a while, and then realized the gravity of what he'd done. He'd killed someone. So he'd better get out of here, he reasoned. The thought of guilt never even crossed his mind. He sprang up, his head clear and functioning without the need nagging at him.

He crossed to the window and threw it open, not caring about the fact that blood stained the sills or that he may look strange walking through the streets covered in blood and wearing a hospital gown, only feeling heady with the pleasure of having quenched his need.

He moved through the night, imagining that he would be fine, that soon he would get his memories and go home (wherever home was) and everything would be fantastic. The fact that he'd killed someone didn't matter; no one would know who he was anyway so they couldn't track him down. He had a skip in his step as he walked, happy that he would never feel as horrible as he had when that need had taken him, happy that he'd never feel the need again. He had no idea just how wrong he was.


Sorry this chapter was a little slow but I had to set up the plot and stuffs. UvU But don't worry, darling Mr. Trancy will make his debut in the next chapter and shit's gunna go down.