A Promise to be Better 30

Author: Raven Dancer

disclaimer: All characters belong to J.K. Rowling except for the Drs. Barnes, Beryl and Gibbons. I receive no monetary compensation for these works.

Summary: refusing

When James Barnes woke it was nearly 8 am. The weak sunlight pushed through the windows. He slowly sat up stretching his stiff back and decided to check on Snape, make sure the IV was still working.

Opening the bedroom door the elder Healer went directly to the bed. Under the covers still snoring softly were Dumbledore and his son.

Snape was missing.

Not one to panic, James glanced around the room. The line from the IV was hanging off the pole, the heplock attached. Any remaining potion had dripped onto the rug. Moving to the window Barnes tapped the glass. Of course Jeffrey had charmed it shut.

Then he saw Snape sitting hunched up in the corner, face resting on knees. His eyes were open, fearful and distant. Tears had slipped out and dampened his pajamas.

"Professor Snape? Severus?" James spoke quietly. He watched shoulders suddenly jerk in reaction, but the wizard did not move from his position. Moving with utmost care the Healer drew closer.

"Severus, it's so cold. Why don't you climb back into bed?" he asked gently. He noted Snape began to quiver.

"No, can't," came the barely whispered reply. Barnes very slowly crouched down near the Potions Master, close, but not too close.

"Yes, you can Severus. You're safe here," he said.

"They'll be mad. I don't want them to be mad at me," Snape said disheartened.

"Who will be mad?" Barnes queried, wondering if the wizard was current or locked in some old memory.

"Mother and Father. I was bad. I don't want to wake them," ok, old memory. Barnes wondered where Snape thought he was, somewhere in his old home probably.

"Your parents aren't here, Severus. You're at Hogwarts," Barnes tried the direct approach and was rewarded with a glance, eyes more focused. Then they diffused once more.

"They're going to hurt me when they wake up," the small voice continued. Barnes hoped neither his son nor the Headmaster woke anytime soon.

"Severus, I'll help you. No one is going to hurt you," he moved a little closer, hoping to get a chance to pulse the wizard. Snape scooted tight against the wall.

"No one will hurt you, Severus. Let's go into the other room. Are you hungry? Do you want to go to the bathroom?" Barnes worked on moving Snape's attention to something other than the place he was trapped in.

At the mention of food the wizard's stomach grumbled. He hadn't eaten since the day before. He was hungry. He needed to go to the bathroom. Looking at the man in front of him for a moment he wondered exactly where he was.

"Dr. James?" Snape sounded lost. Barnes tamped down his desire to pull the wizard into a hug and instead allowed him time to get used to him.

"Yes, Severus, I'm Dr. James. Would you like to come with me and eat a little? We can talk, too," the elder Barnes said in as calm a voice as he could manage. With a little nod Snape reached out one hand, the Healer took it carefully, energy pulsed carefully into the shattered nerves of the Potions Master's body.

The desired effect was nearly immediate, a relaxed sigh, the tense body released enough to stand up. James did not let go, his patient was as unsteady as a newborn colt and just as skittery. Gently tugging, Snape was led first into the bathroom. The logistics were a bit difficult as the wizard did not want to let go of his only line to reality, but soon hands were washed and dried.

Next to the table. With trepidation James rang for one of the house elves. Dobby popped up but upon seeing the Potions Master assumed a very deferential stance, crouching quietly in front of both men.

"Professor Snape is awake. Professor Snape wants to eats?" Dobby smile softly as he spoke. The normal shrill voice toned down. The professor nodded.

"Dobby, bring a light breakfast, please. And some warm milk," he looked at Snape, "would you like some warm milk, Severus?"

Again, the silent nod. Dobby left even more quietly than he arrived. They sat without speaking, the doctor letting the Potions Master relax.

Oatmeal came up with two bowls and a pitcher of warm milk. Giving Snape one last pulse, James let go of his hand and spooned out the hot cereal. Sugar and cream was added. He encouraged his companion to eat.

Once the cereal was finished the Healer called his satchel to him and rummaged around for two different potions.

"Severus, do you remember what happened?" he asked gently. Snape looked at him mildly confused.

"You were tortured by Voldemort, Severus. Your nerves are somewhat fried," Barnes started, then stopped when the wizard shook his head negatively.

"Not Voldemort. Lucius," Snape corrected with a shiver of disgust.

"You were tortured by Lucius. Nearly as bad as last summer. You need to sleep and heal for the next few days. Then Jeffrey needs to work with you and Albus," the fidoctor explained carefully.

"No," Snape said very quietly.

"'No' to what?" Barnes asked in the same tone as before.

"Doctor Barnes and the Headmaster don't need to work with me," Snape managed, beginning to get agitated again.

"Jeffrey and Albus want to talk with you," Barnes tried again. He watched Snape very carefully, noting the wizard quickly closing into himself. He ceased talking and simply shook his head no.

"Ok, Severus. Then let's just rest, ok?" Slight nod. Barnes poured out some warm milk. He picked up the vials and poured each into the mug.

"Ok, Severus, first some potion to heal your nerves. Then a dreamless sleeping draught," he nudged the mug towards Snape. A mix of emotions played across his face.

"Severus?" Barnes held out his hand, palm up. Slowly Snape took the offered hand, eyes full of fear. A little warmth, some soothing energy and the wizard began to calm down again.

"Drink, Severus," he encouraged and waited while Snape pi›cked up the mug and slowly drank. Once finished the Healer tugged the Potions Master to the lounge, helping him lie down and wrapped warmly under the covers. He did not even attempt to rest with the shattered wizard, but merely pulled another chair close. Snape reached out silently and the older doctor took his hand.

"Sleep, Severus, sleep and be well. I will be here," Barnes murmured, watching the professor slip into sleep. The first dose of potions had lasted between five and six hours. Rather amazing when the Healer considered it usually kept patients out for nearly 10 hours.

The emotional upset certainly contributed to Snape's problems. He knew the tension between Jeffrey and Dumbledore only exacerbated them. It was going to take a little longer to get Snape back to them healthy and emotionally whole than last summer! He settled down and rested his eyes.

The next thing he knew there were loud voices in the other room and he opened sleepy eyes to Jeffrey tflhen Dumbledore spilling out of the bedroom. Well, he couldn't very well have left a note, could he?

His patient was still asleep, still clinging to his hand. James waited until the Headmaster saw them and smiled, holding his free finger to his lips to quiet them down. Jeffrey was immediately next to the lounge, scanning and reading his patient. The Headmaster was next, gently stroking the tangled hair.

"What happened?" Dumbledore asked quietly.

the elder Healer explained what he'd found and cautioned them both about approaching the wizard. He reported his surprise that the Potions Master had broken through the heavy-duty potions they'd used. He noted that it was three hours into this particular dose.

"Should you restart the IV?" the Headmaster asked, looking at the plaster on Snape's arm.

"He ate for me, took his potions with little resistance; I'd say no because he might pull them out again," James offered his opinion.

"I like the idea of being able to control his sleep," the younger Healer mused.

"Control? He broke out of it earlier," Dumbledore pointed out.

"I can up the dosage," countered Barnes, a little too sharp.

"You said last night you had him near the limit," the Headmaster snapped back.

In his sleep Snape twitched, clenched the hand tighter. James glanced at the two wizards squaring off yet again, although this time it looked as if Dumbledore was going to be a more active participant. He sighed.

"Gentlemen, if you are going to insist taking up where you left off this morning would you kindly leave?" Barnes said as calmly as he could, his eyes glaring at them. "Even in sleep Severus is reacting to your voices. He has to sleep, he has to heal. I will stay the day and you both will leave. Go and lock yourself in another tower and get this out of you system before you return. If you can't," Barnes' eyes were dark. "If you can't please set up a schedule so you aren't within two closed doors of Severus together." He would not negotiate; quietly and firmly he sent them out of Dumbledore's offices.

Snape jerked awake, every nerve seemed to be on fire. He struggled, trying to get away from the vision of Malfoy laughing over him. He would have fallen onto the floor if not for the tangle of covers.

"Severus? Ssshh, it ok. You're safe here child," Dumbledore's calm voice settled over him like a comforting blanket. The struggling stopped for a moment, eyes slitting open trying to find the Headmaster.

*I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't* Snape remonstrated himself as he got a look into Dumbledore's face.

"Child, you are fine," the Headmaster continued, stretching out a hand to touch his friend.

*oh, please, please,* Snape thought, longing for the comfort. But when the hand nearly touched him he struggled backwards and did end up on the floor. *NO!* his body screamed out.

"I'm fine Headmaster Dumbledore. I'm f-fine," Snape continued to back up until he hit the couch, pulling himself into a tight ball.

"Albus, remember? I'm Albus," the Headmaster's heart ached. Why didn't Snape want him to hold him? He'd never hurt Snape, never struck him, yet he was reeling back as if he'd been beaten.

*nonononono*, Snape just shook his head, body starting to tremble.

"Albus, just back slowly away," Jeffrey Barnes said as quietly as he could. Both men had come to an agreement, for the time being. Getting the Potions Master back and healed was more important than their disagreements. The Healer carefully crouched down near Snape.

"Severus? You'll be fine. Just breathe deeply. In a few minutes you can use the loo and have something to eat," Barnes said calmly.

"Dr. James said you'd eat a little for us, and drink your milk." Snape tried desperately to stop the shaking.

"I need to go to my rooms, Dr. Barnes. I don't want to be any trouble. Can I go to my rooms, please?" he begged shamelessly. *Just let me go* he thought.

"No, Severus," Dumbledore sat on the edge of the lounge staying as calm as he could. "You need some healing done and we can protect you best right here. No one will harm you, child." They watched the Potions Master curl up tighter, trying to disappear. Eyes became vacant as he returned to another place, another time.

"I tried, mommy, I really tried. I won't be bad again. Don't hurt me, mommy," Snape moaned as he rocked.

"Professor Snape? You are at Hogwarts' school, Professor," the young Healer tried. "You're with Albus and Jeffrey. Your parents aren't here, Professor Snape."

"tried, really, tried," as tears fell. They watched as the Potions Master's body flinched at remembered impacts.

"What can we do?" Dumbledore looked at Barnes.

"If we can't get him to recognize us, we'll have to sedate him. I'll have to bind him before I can give him any injections," Barnes replied.

"Let's try again," the Headmaster whispered. He turned his attention more fully on his friend.

"Severus?" Dumbledore said sharply and was rewarded with dull eyes looking at him. "Professor? I need you to help me. Can you?"

Snape slowly focused on his mentor and a glimmer of recognition passed through his eyes.

"Headmaster? What can I do for you?" an almost hopeful tone in the thin voice.

"I need to to eat with me, Severus. Can you get up and come to the table?" Dumbledore quelled his desire to grab his friend in a hug. He was rewarded with a little nod.

"I need to use the washroom, Headmaster," Snape pushed up slowly and staggered to the loo, Barnes in tow but not touching. The door was left open as he attended to his business. Once washed he managed to make it to the table.

Snape ate the food in front of him without comment. A glass of warm milk followed and he drained it slowly.

"Dr. James gave me milk," he said softly.

"Yes, Dr. James did give you milk. This is just like his milk, Severus. It will help you sleep and heal. You were very badly hurt," the young Healer explained. Snape's eyes blinked as he became sleepy.

"Voldemort is going to get aurors and kill them," Snape suddenly remembered. "Going to make them talk."

"Who, Severus?" Dumbledore encouraged, although when he got close Snape drew back.

"R-rennet, Sylvan and Matthias. Alone. Need to be protected," Snape stammered out.

"Thank you, Severus. I will send a message and take care of them," the Headmaster said. Now he managed to get a hand on Snape's shoulder and gently patted him. For a moment the Potions Master leaned into the touch. Then the moment passed and he withdrew. Barnes laid a soft hand on Snape's back and pulsed in warming energy, watching his patient's eyes slowly lose the fight against sleep.

"Rest, Severus, you're safe with us," the Healer murmured.

"Sleep, Child," Dumbledore whispered.

Eyelids sliding closed, Snape slept.