Angry readers! Do not kill me! I have an explanation for why I haven't updated in forever! Please put your pitchforks away, read the tiny, tiny chapter, and then read the Author's Note at the end. [Dodges pitchfork fire by jumping behind Kyo]

Kyo: Hey hey hey hey! Why are you hiding behind me?!
They like you, not me!! Now quickly, distract them with the disclaimer!

Kyo: Jamie doesn't own Twilight, Fruits Baskets, or any of the characters in it. She does own Elisa Soma and the plot to this fiction.

I don't think it worked… [mob tries to hit Kyo with pitchforks]

Kyo: Nice angry mob, don't hurt Kyo, and OHEMGEE LOOK ITS EDWARD! [points behind mob, who turn to look at nothing.] Run!

On with the fic! [runs off]

START

Shigure slammed his fist against the door of the Cullen's house repeatedly. Carlisle opened the door and smiled.

"Hello, Shigure I assume. Very nice to meet you. Come in." Carlisle beckoned for him to enter, but Shigure stood where he was. He looked rather angry.

"I saw what looked like Elisa running at a speed humans can't run at. I hate to point fingers, but ever since I met your kids I've had a suspicion.

"Oh, really? What would that be?"

"Vampires." He stated. Carlisle laughed, not looking nervous at all.

"That is hilarious, Shigure. Vampires don't exist."

"Yes they do! One came through here only a few months ago. You smell the same, sickly sweet way that she did. And she attacked our family's head. That's why we don't trust vampires anymore. Maybe you knew her? She had red hair."

"Victoria." Carlisle whispered.

"So you were friends? Vampires." He spat the last word.

"Not friends. Not at all. She tried to kill Bella. Multiple times actually. I thought the wolves killed her." Carlisle said, utterly confused.

"You're a threat to us, blood drinker. Who have you killed so far?" Shigure asked venomously.

"We only hunt animals…" Carlisle said.

"…animals?" Shigure said, paling.

"Deer, bear, mountain cats, the occasional wolf." Emmett said. Shigure jumped.

"When did you get here?" Shigure asked.

"I live here." Emmett said in a teasing tone. "So I take it the vampire cat is out of the were-wolf skinned bag."

"Emmett, did you hear him?" Carlisle asked. "Victoria is still alive."

END

[She and Kyo sneak back on] Are they gone?

Kyo: I think so…

Please review, or I'll be tempted to feed you to Victoria.

James: I thought I got to eat them!
Holy shit! Where did you come from!?

Kyo: Back off vampire! We just dealt with an angry-oh shit.

What?!

Kyo: The mob is back!

Quick, throw James at them!
James: What? [Kyo picks James up and throws him into mob.]

Kyo: Once again, run!

Bye guys! And read my random weird author's note, kay? I wrote it before the chapter so it sounds kind of weird. Gotta run!

[They run into the random forest that appeared out of nowhere.]

Author's Note

Hello all good readers of this fiction. As you've most likely noticed, I haven't updated in a while. Not for lack of trying, though. The original idea had no plot whatsoever…but I'm finding one! I'm really sorry about the wait, but hopefully now that this writer's block seems to be over-ish I should be able to update more frequently. And I'm sorry that this chapter is miniscule…but there's more coming, hopefully within the next two weeks.

And the Victoria thing…I'm gonna explain now that in this universe she was killed by the werewolves in Eclipse, not ripped to shreds and burnt by Eddie boy. I needed a plot twist, and it came with red hair ;)

Thank you for sticking with this story if you are still reading, and sorry again!!

3 Jamie