[A/N: I'm glad that most of you understand why I wrote this story this way.
WiseGirlandSeaweedBrain: Thank you. And here's a new update. :D
MegJackson: This happened after The Last Olympian. :D
Guest: Thank you very much, and I'm sorry about your fingers.
annabethjackson1: Thank you! :D
Hermes' Little Girl: I'm thankful that someone like you posted that review. Seriously, others need to grasp the fact that things won't always happen the way they want them to. And thank you for the compliments! :D
monkeyjoe: I'm glad you like it. :D
CimFan: I know most of you thought that Percy would be so devastated that he'd turn to Sam and try to do something not friendly, or that Sam will make a move on him. i wanted to surprise you and I guess I did. And to answer your question, yes, Camp Half-Blood will be featured again, though not the end.
readwritereview: I doubt that. See, if people appear to dislike you, it's because they envy you or they are insecure of you. Don;t let them get the best of you! :D
PJOWiseGirlandSeaweedBrain: Thank you. :D
And hey, guys, someone said I should stop because of what's happening. You know who you are and this is my message to you: I WON'T STOP. I have a couple of loyal readers here who actually like my story. If you don't, then I suggest you don't read it anymore and stop trying to bring other people down.]
WISE GIRL'S SEAWEED BRAIN
Chapter 18: WHERE IS YOUR HEART
PERCY
I'm okay. I'm okay.
Those were the words I'd been repeating to myself these past few days. Was I okay? Hades, no. I wasn't. Annabeth broke up with me, thinking that I was falling for Samantha. Was I? I had no idea. Dang, I hate it that I'm such a stupid guy.
Had I been better at figuring things out, I wouldn't have had to be parted from her . . .
I shook my head. I shouldn't be thinking like this. Annabeth broke up with me not just because of my unresolved feelings for my friend but also because, apparently, I was just being a distraction. It was harsh, and it hurt so much, but I knew that it was true. So yeah, I let her go, even when it felt like I was drinking water from the River Styx, being stabbed repeated on the chest by the Minotaur's horn and torched by Hephaestus's bronze bulls, all at the same time. What I felt wasn't isolated at a small portion of my body, or my heart (seriously, Percy?); it was more like I could feel everything throughout the rest of my body. Sometimes, when I thought about Annabeth, I found my body being attacked by spasms. It all centered to knowing that Ananbeth and I weren't together anymore.
I wondered whether Annabeth was thinking of me as much as I was thinking of her. I didn't think so. She was probably so busy that I didn't even cross her mind. WHACK! Another stab.
Three years ago, when Annabeth was abducted by Dr. Thorn, I thought I'd experienced the worst feelings, thinking that I'd lost her forever. This was a whole lot worse. She wasn't with me, but she was just an arm's length away. I could just reach out and hold her; except I was sure she wasn't going to reach back. That's what made it more painful.
I tried so hard to hide my emotions. The last thing I wanted was to worry those around me, though I was sure I wasn't fooling anyone. I'm okay, I had told them but I knew deep inside that I wasn't fine. I felt like my other half had been torn away from me.
My phone rang and I dove to retrieve it, thinking that it was Annabeth. But it wasn't. It was Samantha. I let out a sigh. She had been helping me understand what I really felt for her and I was so grateful that she was doing it by acting the way she had been, before her confession. It made me feel less guilty. At least there weren't any more awkward situations between us.
Well, except when I fell asleep using her as my pillow
I clicked answer and held the phone near my ear. "Hey, Perce," she greeted.
"Hey, Sam," I said. "What's up?"
"Nothing much," she answered. "Listen, are you busy?"
I scoffed. "Why would I be busy?"
"I don't know," she said. "Home works, maybe?"
That made me chuckle. "Me – home works, Sam, really?"
Samantha laughed from the other line. "Yeah. I totally forgot m y friend hates doing school works. Anyway, the reason why I called is to see if you're free for the day."
"Why?"
"I need to go to the grocery," said Sam. "I mean, I didn't call you to see if you can accompany me but because I need someone to come with me; I got a lot to buy."
I frowned. "Why? You're having a party?"
There was a pause from the other line. "Um, yeah. Tomorrow."
I thought for a moment. Samantha throwing a party? That's like asking Annabeth not to visit the bookstore whenever we're at the mall. Oh . . . There I was again. "Why, what's the occasion?" I asked.
Samantha surprised me by yelling, "JACKSON!"
I leaned away from my phone, wincing. When I leaned back into it, I said, "No need to bust my eardrum, Willard." Samantha chuckled from the other line. "Seriously, though, what are you celebrating?"
I heard Samantha sighing. "Perce, what date is it today?"
"Um," I said, looking around for a calendar. Of course, I didn't have any. "It's February 28th, right?"
"Correct," Samantha said. "Now if today is the end of February, what date is it tomorrow?"
Samantha's tone reminded me of Annabeth. She uses that tone to me whenever I ask a question she considers stupid. Seriously, that girl has to accept the fact that not every single demigod is as smart as she is.
"March 1st, Sam," I answered. "Tomorrow's March – " Then it dawned on me. "Tomorrow's your birthday!" I exclaimed. I had totally forgotten about it, what with all the things running around in my head.
Samantha Reese Willard was born on March 1st. She mentioned once that she'd never had a party to celebrate her birthday, partly because she hated them and partly because her Mom insisted that they shouldn't celebrate the day when she lost the ability to bear children – the very day that her family started falling apart. As if that was Samantha's fault.
Once Samantha told me and the guys that now she actually had real friends, she intended to celebrate her birthday no matter what.
"Very good, Perce," Samantha said approvingly. "Now that you remember, will you come with me to the grocery?"
"Of course," I answered without hesitation. "You want me to pick you up?"
"That sounds nice."
"Okay. I'll be there in five."
Samantha hung up. I stood up and went down the living room where my parents were watching television. They knew about my break-up with Annabeth, but they weren't trying to be the attentive parents. They knew I needed some time alone and they respected it. I was grateful for that.
"You're going somewhere?" Paul asked. I liked the guy. He didn't try very hard to fit into my life. Usually he left me alone and let me do whatever I wanted, knowing that I could pretty much take care of myself. But he was a natural parent. Sometimes I felt more comfortable around him than my Mom. Maybe that's because we're both dudes. Or maybe because he reminded me of Chiron.
"Yeah," I answered. "Sam needs help buying groceries. Tomorrow's her birthday."
Mom looked up from typing on her laptop. "You seem to be spending a lot of time with Samantha these days. Is something going on with you two?"
See what I mean?
I appreciate that she wanted to be involved in my life but there are things that parents have to know they can't butt into when it comes to their child's life.
"Sally," Paul interjected, seeing my expression. "Whatever it is, I'm sure Percy knows what he's doing."
I hope so, I said in my mind.
"I'll be back before seven," I said before going out.
It was two in the afternoon. I was pretty sure going to the grocery won't take five hours but with girls . . . you just never knew. Annabeth sometimes spend hours in the mall just looking around. Though in her case, she wasn't looking for clothes; she was checking the structural supports and everything else that I couldn't even understand of the building.
Samantha was waiting for me when I arrived. She was in a simple green shirt, jeans and sneakers the same color as her top. Her hair was tied back in a pony tail. It was a simple look for a girl who was about to be an adult but as far as I was concerned, she looked really beautiful.
"Hey, you," she greeted, jumping in the passenger's side of my car.
"Hello," I said simply.
While driving, Samantha and I made small talks. We both avoided mentioning Annabeth. I was thankful to her for that. She knew it was still a very sore subject.
"Do you think I should buy beers?" she asked.
I looked at her and found her eyes glued to my face. I looked away and cleared my throat before answering. "I'm not sure. Your guests will sure be consisted of students from our school. Do you think you should tolerate teenage drinking?"
Samantha thought about it for a moment. "Definitely not."
"There you go," I said. "Though I'm sure some of them will bring alcoholic beverages." Samantha nodded. Before I could stop myself, I blurted out, "Just promise me not to get drunk, okay? After the last incident, I'm not so anxious to see you like that again."
Samantha's face reddened. For a while, I had no clue why. Then I remembered what happened in my car the last time she wasn't herself. "Oh, Sam. I didn't mean that," I said.
"Um, okay," she said and stayed quiet after that.
The supermarket wasn't very crowded, given that it was Thursday. I found a pushcart and followed Samantha. She was quiet and I knew I'd embarrassed her with what I said back in the car. I placed my hand on her shoulder and turned her around. She looked at me in confusion and I said, "Look, Sam, I didn't mean to mean to mention what I said. Let's just forget it, okay?"
"Forget it," Samantha repeated. "That's exactly what I need – forget that I nearly raped my best friend."
I laughed loudly. Samantha smiled at me and I knew we were okay. "Yeah. We should definitely forget about it," I said.
It was easier to talk after that.
"Where's Maria? Why didn't she come with us?" I asked after a while.
"Oh, she and Mom went to our vacation house in Brooklyn," Samantha said, looking up from choosing between orange and lemon-flavored iced tea. Honestly, I didn't see why she needed to do that. Orange and lemon are both citrus fruits, right? They're pretty much the same.
"She just went?" I asked. I knew Samantha's Mom didn't like visiting their vacation house since that's where she met Samantha's Dad.
"I merely suggested to Maria that it would be cool if I have my birthday party without any adult supervision," Samantha said, winking at me.
"I wonder how Maria managed to convince your Mom."
"Oh, she can be pretty persuasive if she wants to," Samantha said.
"Does that mean you're thinking about having a wild party?" I teased.
Samantha grinned at me. "That, Percy Jackson, is a very cool idea."
I chuckled as we made our way to the cashier. At least Samantha didn't spend a thousand hours debating whether she should pick the red plastic cups or the Styrofoam ones so my feet were safe from walking back and forth.
I thought we would head back home after paying. But no. Apparently, Samantha wanted to have an early dinner with me. We dumped the groceries in my car and went to an expensive restaurant with food prices that could pretty much pay for a month's worth of food for me. And because it was me, that was saying a lot.
"Um, Sam," I said hesitantly. My friend was already inside and turned around to look at me, her eyebrows raised. "My money's not enough for their astronomical prices." The security guard glared at me.
Samantha laughed. "Relax, Perce, it's on me."
That made me uncomfortable. I mean I was the dude, I was supposed to be the one paying for this. Samantha, seeing my expression, walked back to me and grabbed my hand, pulling me inside. "Consider this our celebration, okay?" she said.
A cute waitress welcomed us and led us to a table at the corner of the restaurant. The ambiance was cozy and very, very pricey. I was handed a menu and my eyes nearly popped out of their sockets when I saw the prices. Samantha giggled when she saw my expression and went back into choosing.
I tried to appear like I knew what I was doing, except I was sure I looked like a total idiot. (Hey, it comes out naturally.) I had no idea what the things written in the menu were. One looked like a giant pile of Mrs. O'Leary's poop (excuse me if you're eating); another one resembled scooped cow brains. I figured Hera would have a heart attack if she saw that one.
Samantha looked up and spoke to the waitress. She nodded and turned to me. "Have you made up your mind, Sir?" she asked.
I looked helplessly at Samantha. "Can you order for me?" I asked. "I don't want to end up ordering the manager."
Samantha and the waitress laughed. Oh, great. Let's all laugh at Percy's stupidity.
"Just give him what I ordered," Samantha said. The waitress nodded and walked away.
Samantha placed her elbows on top of the table and leaned closer to me. "So, how are you these days?"
I frowned. "What do you mean?"
She shrugged. "You know, with the break up and all."
I sighed. "I'm kind of hoping we'd avoid that subject."
"Oh, sorry."
"No, it's okay," I said, folding and unfolding my napkin. "I'm okay, really. I've done some thinking over week. I guess I have a better idea of what I really want to happen."
Samantha nodded. "So, what did you find out?"
I looked at her. "I'm not sure if I should answer that question. I don't think talking about it with you, of all people, is a good idea."
Samantha smirked. "Look, Perce, you don't have to worry about me. The only possible way for you to hurt me is if you're in pain." She looked me in the eyes and I fought the urge to ask her if she had the same talent as Rachel's, except her eyes could see through people, rather than the Mist. "And I know you are, right now. So if you don't want to hurt me, you'd better not do the same to yourself."
I stared at her in awe. What did I do to have someone like her love me? She was so selfless. "What I found out is that I want . . . no, I need Annabeth in my life." Samantha's face remained the same so I decided to continue. "I love her, Sam." I knew I might as well stab her with my fork when I said that but I didn't want to be unfair to her. I wanted her to know what I really felt for Annabeth.
"Are you sure?" she asked.
Her question kind of surprised me. I mean, what other proof did she need? "It's the only thing I'm sure in my life. Annabeth is the only one I know I need with me."
"Why do you think you think you love her?"
"Sam, it would be a whole lot easier to answer if you asked me to explain what water tastes like," I said. "But I'll try to answer that. I love her because . . . because she brings out the best in me. I fell for her because she makes me glad that I'm alive, despite of what is always happening around me. I love her because in this world full of lies and deceptions, she's the only truth I know."
(Well done, Jackson.)
Samantha looked thoughtful for a moment. I knew every word I said hurt her. I was about to apologize when she spoke. "I'm about to take a very high road right now."
I frowned. "What do you mean?"
Samantha exhaled. "I mean that I love you, Perce," she said, her eyes glued to mine. My heart beat faster with what she said. Samantha had never told me those words. I mean, yeah, she did, but she was drunk that time. "And it's because I love you why I can never be selfish with you. You have to promise me that you will do everything that you can to win Annabeth back. Swear to me that you're not going to stop until you have her again. Because honestly, thought it would be really painful for my part, I won't be happy again until I see you smiling with light in your eyes. And that will only happen when you and Annabeth are back together."
I was speechless at first. Samantha was making a sacrifice, too, for me. She wanted me to be happy, even when the price of my happiness was her own. Even if Annabeth wasn't in the picture, I knew I would never deserve someone like Samantha. Heck, I barely deserve Annabeth.
"But Sam, remember she broke up with me because I'm having feelings for – "
"It doesn't matter what you feel for me, Perce," she said, cutting me off. "You love Annabeth. You belong with her. It's that simple. You have to get her back. Promise me." She must've seen the hesitation in my eyes for she added, "The other thing, about you being a distraction, I'm sure she didn't mean that, Perce. And even if she did, it shouldn't matter to you. You love her. You have to fight for her."
"Even when it hurts?" I don't know where that came from. It just slipped from my mouth.
Samantha smiled. "Pain is what makes love worth fighting for." She took my hand and gripped it tightly. "There's a chance that you and Annabeth won't be back now. After what she said that she needs to live her dream, but somewhere, sometime, I believe you'll find your way back to each other. You just have to wait. Is that something you'd be willing to do?"
I nodded. "I'd wait for an eternity for her," I muttered.
Samantha smiled. She would've said more, except that our order arrived. We ate in silence, partly because the food – whatever it's called – was excellent and partly because I was thinking about what Samantha said.
You have to fight for her, she told me. I should've done that from the very beginning. I shouldn't have let her slip from my grasp. I guess I was just too confused and hurt. I was still determined to figure out what I really felt for my friend, though. I didn't want to be unfair to Annabeth when – if – we get back together.
When we were done, an idea came to my mind. A promise unfulfilled. "Do you mind coming with me?" I asked after she paid the bill.
"Of course not," she answered quickly. "Where?"
"You'll see," I said simply.
Luckily, the store wasn't that far from the restaurant. When Samantha saw where we were going, she smiled in satisfaction. "That's what I'm talking about, Perce."
I grinned at her. Though we might not be back together for some time, I wanted to do this now, to remind me that Annabeth and I would be back together, where we rightfully belong.
"Come on," I said, pulling Samantha inside.
[Next - Chapter 19: IN PIECES
A little advice: prepare for the upcoming chapter. :D]
