The Year of Rocket's Revenge
Session: October, Part 3 (10.17.05/11.09.06)
A Ditz's Guide to Waitressing at the Shore Spot!
Chapter 19... Collecting the Bill.
Hopefully by this point, you've catered to all of your customers' whims and requests, no matter how fanciful or beyond reason they might have been. You should now be at the part of the meal that every customer dreads.
Getting the bill.
After the lengthy interaction you've had with your guest, you should be able to discern whether they are able to afford everything they ordered for their meal. Normally, this isn't a problem... given the quality of the delicacies you've served, they know what to expect. But on occasion, you'll come across a schmuck who had no idea what he was getting into. That, or even worse, someone with the blatant intent of running out on the bill.
In most cases, the maitre'd will have already chased off any suspicious characters before they even get to you. But one can slip through once in awhile, especially if they're dressed to impress. That leaves it to you to discern the honestly wealthy from the crooked posers.
One key thing to look for is to see if the diner is ordering items without any care for taste, price, or availability. If it seems they might be ordering without any set method of care, prompt them for proof that they can pay for their meal. Sure, you run the risk of offending said diner, but you're part of a reputable business here at the Shore Spot. Better to have egg on your face now for a minor gribble than have some later for a major uh-oh.
Another thing... if you have any suspicions... any at all, alert a co-worker immediately! When you go to present the bill, be accompanied by a fellow waitress, or even by the manager. Make sure someone is there to keep an eye on the guests if you have any reason to believe they plan to skip out on the bill. Do NOT, under any circumstances, leave a table unattended after laying a bill on the table if you have ANY reason, no matter how small, to believe that they MIGHT or WILL RUN.
An ounce of prevention will go along way to protecting the investments and clientele of the Shore Spot... as well as your employment.
Don't be the one who spaces out! Keep someone from running out, or you'll be doing the running... to a new place of employment!
(Click NEXT to move onto Chapter 20... How to Pick Up Tips.)
And so, days upon days of searching commenced. Jane and Calamity followed the trail of their 'doomed' counterparts, dropping by hotels, clothing stores, a supermarket, a hair salon, and, naturally, more and more eating establishments. Though the duo was successful in gathering intel and following the footsteps of Jessie and James... probably too closely, since they were swiping almost as much as the two ex-Rockets were... they had yet to actually locate them.
That didn't mean they weren't having fun...
"It's like I've been born again," Calamity exclaimed. "It's been ages since we resorted to petty thievery."
"Maybe it's time to stop kidding around and move onto grand larceny," suggested Jane. "We've already got the basics of life... let's stop stealing from the poor and starting swiping from those who can afford to lose it!"
"Ha! You know, this has been so exhilarating, reliving my days as a youngin', that I've forgotten the whole reason we're here!"
"Don't be so naive," deadpanned Jane. "It's so not you."
"Okay, so maybe I haven't. But I'd like to think so."
"Are you crazy? If you-know-who finds out we haven't found and taken out you-know-who and you-know-who, and especially that rascally one you-know-who the you-know-who hates, you-know-who will have you-know-who's heads!"
Calamity scratched his head. "You... lost me there."
"If we don't find Jessie, James, and Persian, then the boss'll find you and me... and do away with us! Doesn't that frighten you in the least?"
"No. Because Team Rocket operative rule number one is, and I quote... 'You must not be afraid of anything!'"
"You think you're a real smart-alec, don't you? Sigh... let's just get this mission done and over with so we can jump on this grand larceny idea."
"Because there's this 50-inch hi-definition TV that you want to buy for the break room at HQ?"
"You read my mind as if it were an open book. With the cover glued to my face. And words with such large print a blind person can read it from TEAM ROCKET'S MOON BASE!"
"Your sarcasm's as good as my low-brow jokes, Jane-y."
"Hardy har har."
As the two walked off to resume their search, they were unaware that two pairs of eyes peered at them from a window from a few levels above.
"Why won't those two give it up?" Jessie growled angrily. "Especially that Jane... she's almost as irritating as that darn Cassidy!"
"Wow," James gasped. "That's quite irritating."
"At least we can take solace in the fact that they're doing just as well at finding us as those other Rockets. And the police."
"I'm surprised the force is so lacking, especially after all of that hoopla with the disk and the twerps and those guns."
"Probably a bunch of incompetents that were replacing the idiots that got fired after they let not only us, but Jane and Calamity down there break out of the city's so-claimed Maximum Security Prison!"
"And yet that Officer Jenny remains on the force," James pointed out... literally, as she was on the opposite end of the alley Jane and Calamity were in... giving a lollipop to a little girl who had skinned her knee after falling on the sidewalk pavement.
"Seems more like a Joy than a Jenny," commented Jessie as she looked on.
"Very Joy-ful."
"Hey, Persian!" Jessie yelled, turning around and glaring at the feline moping in the far corner of a room barren except for a sheetless bed. "Why aren't you adding any color commentary to this discussion?"
"Act like you're in the same doomed predicament as Jessie and I!"
Persian sighed heavily. "Doomed. Doom Ed. It's a funny word."
"That's not what we meant!" the two Rockets screamed in unison.
Persian sighed again. "I'm sorry, youse two. But I still can't gets over da fact that I'm not my compact, wise-cracking Meowth self anymore."
"You're still moping over that?"
"Yeah. I know I've been used to it for months now."
"WELL, I'M NOT!"
"Still?"
"Talk about holding a grudge."
Persian nearly broke out in tears. "I can remember it as if dat day of my life were yesterday..."
"Hold on a minute!" Jessie objected.
"Yeah! You know we damn can't afford a flashback! We're living in an abandoned apartment building with no running anything!"
"'Cept for dem cockroaches," observed Persian, as one such bug crawled by him, mere inches away from his whiskers. "BUT I'M DOING IT ANYWAY!"
Flashback many months ago, inset to the Celadon City Gym. The gym leader, Erika, was in the midst of a battle with Misty, who at the time was on her badge journey.
"Da twerpette and dat perfume girl was in da midst of battle when we broke in, making a side trip from capturing dem three legendary boids," Persian said, narrating the scene.
"We captured the legendary birds before?" asked Jessie.
"See? We accomplished plenty as Rockets!" remembered James.
"Hey! Who's narrating dis thing anyway?"
"Sorry," the two apologized.
"Anyways..."
The focus turned to the battle, which had just gotten underway minutes ago. Erika's Tangela had just picked Misty's Poliwhirl up with her vines and slammed her to the ground. Misty was looking for retaliation.
"Poliwhirl!" Misty shouted. "Now, use Body Slam!"
As Poliwhirl motioned to perform the attack, smoke suddenly began to fill the room. Erika and Misty both coughed as it eventually cleared... only now, Jessie, James, and Meowth were in the room with them.
"It's the ones who almost burnt my gym down the last time!" exclaimed Erika.
"Team Rocket!" growled Misty. "I was wondering when you'd show up!"
Jessie growled right back. "Be quiet, brat!"
"We're here for the Pokémon, so hand them over," declared James.
"And you won't get any trouble from us," Meowth said with a smile.
"We'll never surrender out Pokémon, you gym wreckers!" Erika shot back defiantly.
"Yeah!" Misty added enthusiastically. "Go bother someone else!"
"Well, we'll see who's laughing when this battle's over!" chuckled Jessie as she tossed out a Pokéball.
Misty was surprised when a Hitmonchan popped out. But she had no time to express it, for it was time for the motto!
"WHY DIDN'T YOU DO IT WHEN YOU CAME IN?" Misty yelled at the top of her lungs.
"Because we forgot," admitted Jessie, "so now, without further ado, prepare for trouble!"
"Ready to roll, so let's make it double!" added James in time... uh, rhyme.
"To protect the world from devastation!"
"To unite all peoples within our nation!"
"To denounce the evils of truth and love!"
"To extend our reach to the stars above!"
"Jessie!"
"James!"
But, for a surprising change...
"Misty!"
"Erika!"
"Hey!" Jessie said, now the one upset.
"Don't cut in on our motto!" reprimanded James, though the girls thought it fun to finish what they started.
"We're Pokémon trainers who look beautiful in the night!" proclaimed Misty, adorned in a one-piece blue swimsuit as she showed off her pearl white skin, which glistened like the pure-water river streaming through the forest beside her.
"But when the going gets rough, we always put up a good fight!" Erika punched in, kimono-clad as she held a glass bottle full of perfume and sprayed it all around.
"Gloom gloom!" chimed Erika's Gloom, as she popped out of her Pokéball to join in the fun.
"Meowth meowth..." Meowth added, on his regular cue. "Hey, that actually sounded pretty good!"
Jessie then smacked Meowth with her fan, obviously not pleased with the compliment the feline had just given out.
"Just whose side are you on anyway, Meowth?"
Following the whole motto debacle, the scuffle developed into a three-on-three Pokémon battle. Along with the Hitmonchan Jessie had called out, James brought out Weezing and Meowth made three for the Rockets. Erika had called out her Parasect to join the Gloom that had popped out during the motto, and Misty unleashed her Vaporeon to complete their team.
"Parasect and Gloom," Erika called out, "use Stun Spore!"
"Vaporeon, Tackle!"
"Hitmonchan, go with Comet Punch!"
"Weezing, Smokescreen!"
"Meowth," Meowth ordered himself, "Fury Swipes!"
Team Rocket grabbed the early advantage, as both Hitmonchan and Meowth connected with Erika's Pokémon before they could spore the duo, and Vaporeon's tackle was off the mark and easily dodged by Weezing.
"Parasect, Leech Life! Gloom, Poison Powder!"
"Vaporeon, Aurora Beam!"
"Hitmonchan, Fire Punch!"
"Weezing, Sludge Attack!"
"Meowth, Pay Day!"
On this exchange, Hitmonchan gets Parasect again, though the latter got his attack off this time, leeching some of Hitmonchan's HP and recovering a bit of the damage from the Fire Punch. Vaporeon froze Weezing and his sludge rock solid. And Meowth's attack was nullified after getting a face full of Poison Powder. He didn't fall prey to its effects, but it had temporarily blinded him, leaving him open to attack.
But Meowth seemed to take it in stride.
"It'll take more than that to stop me!"
Suddenly, Meowth began to glow. Everyone gasped as he began to be enveloped in a golden light.
"Wha? What's happenin'? Wait... oh no, wait! Not dat!"
"Meowth's evolving!" Misty stated.
"Meowth? Evolving?" was all a stunned Jessie could muster.
"Stop this evolution!" Meowth cried, frantically flailing around.
At that point, it was too late to stop the evolution process, as Meowth was completely enclosed by the light. Jessie, James, and the others watched with stunned silence as Meowth emerged, evolved into the one Pokémon he hated the most of all.
Persian.
"I can't believe I evolved into a Persian!" he wailed. "The one Pokémon I hate the most! I bet I can't even speak in the human language anymore!"
"I hate to break it to you, Persian..." Jessie butted in.
"But you ARE talking like us!" James exclaimed happily.
"I am?" Persian gasped, ceasing his wailing as he looked himself over and put this revelation to the test. "Wow, I can still talk despite evolving! I can remember everything that's happened in my life as a Meowth!"
"Well, I just remembered something too," admitted Misty.
"And what's that?" questioned Jessie.
"I forgot that Erika and I were in the middle of a gym match... which you three aren't going to mess up this time!"
"I guess we can stop dere," Persian said, ending the flashback.
"But I wanna know how the battle ends!" James cried.
"You know how it ends, numbskull!" grumbled Jessie, slapping James upside the head.
"Ow! But don't the readers at home wanna know?"
"It's easy ta guess," Persian replied.
Meanwhile, down at the docks, a hefty amount of Trovitopolis' police force was standing by as a coal-powered steamboat weighed anchor. Officer Jenny had, since the earlier incident, relocated herself there to supervise a delivery of supplies for the local Poké-Mart.
"Listen up, men!" Officer Jenny shouted, bringing the squads to attention. "As you all should know, there have been numerous reports of Team Rocket agents wandering around the city! We've finally figured out that they've been awaiting this very delivery!"
"May I ask what's so special about this delivery?" one of the lower-ranked officers asked.
"Well, it's full of rare-to-the-island items, including stat boosters and hold items, which are a new product from the Silph Company. Given that they're very expensive and in short supply, anyone selling them could make a hefty profit off of it. Therefore, I've come to the conclusion that Team Rocket has known about this delivery for some time, and they want to steal everything on that ship!"
Though unclear if that was the case, there were Rocket Grunts hiding amongst the boxes, barrels, and other storage units along the docks. And they were listening in. If they didn't know about the rare item shipment before... well, they did now! And they were smiling happily.
"The crew will be unloading their cargo shortly. Make sure to keep a watchful eye, and guard this stuff until it reaches the Poké-Mart! Is that understood?"
"Yes, ma'am!"
Then Officer Jenny, to the surprise of some of the officers, walked towards her motorcycle, as if she was leaving the area.
"Uh... Officer Jenny?" one of them uttered meekly. "Where are you going?"
"The steamer is also picking up a very valuable piece of cargo, being sent by Nurse Joy at the Pokémon Center," she told them. "I'm going to escort it here personally."
Jenny hopped onto her motorcycle, started it up, and sped off towards the Center. The other officers seemed a bit dazed and confused by it, but they prepared to complete their mission anyway, unaware that they would soon be surrounded by Rocket Grunts...
"You know... I've never noticed how close the docks are from here," pondered James, glancing to the shoreline... which was a block and a half away from the abandoned apartment building he and his teammates were shacked up in.
"Is that a ship?" wondered Jessie, pointing it out in the water.
"A ship means salvation and freedom!"
"We can finally get out of this water-locked capital!"
"And dodge capture by Jane and Calamity!"
"What's da use?" Persian said. "It's only a matter of time. I don't like being a Persian anyway... so I'm glad de're ending my misery."
"Don't say that!" Jessie shouted.
"Don't you remember what Team Rocket operative rule number two is?" questioned James.
"Eh... 'You must never, ever give up,'" Persian recited from memory.
"Exactly! There are only two clear options! We escape or they get us!"
"And we've been doing well to escape capture so far! Who's to say our luck will change for the worst?"
"James and I aren't going to give up as long as we can still fight!"
"So be a Pokémon and stand up for yourself!"
"You... you guys really think we's got a chance?"
"Never say never!"
"Nothing's gonna stop us now!"
Persian got up, sniffling as he tried to hold back tears of happiness and hope. "You guys are da best!"
"You mean the best opening theme song lyric stealers of all time?" Jessie and James wished profoundly.
"Y-yeah," Persian sweatdropped nervously as he got up on his hind legs and ran to gave his partners a hug. "Let's go with dat. Makes us seem like we're still da bad guys."
About twenty minutes later, outside of the Pokémon Center...
Two Machamp were being directed by Nurse Joy to the back of a green pickup truck that was parked by the front entrance. The two Pokémon were carrying a large wooden crate, of which the contents were known only to Joy, Jenny, and the truck driver, a husky, bearded man who seemed delighted to help drive the item down to the docks.
"Be careful with it now," Joy calmly reminded the Machamp as they prepared to slide it onto the flatbed trunk. "It's very fragile!"
"You heard the lady!" shouted the truck driver. "We don't get paid if we deliver damaged goods, ya hear?"
"Machamp!" reassured the duo as they proceeded.
"Are you sure this is necessary?" Nurse Joy asked Officer Jenny.
Jenny nodded. "We can't let a piece of hi-tech equipment like this fall into the wrong hands."
With the crate now on the truck, the Machamp went to work using rope to secure it for the trip to the docks. As they toiled away, two pairs of eyes peered at them from binoculars on the rooftop of a nearby building.
"What do you think is in there?" Calamity asked his partner.
"If there's an Officer Jenny escorting it," deduced Jane, "then it must be something of the highest value!"
"I guess we'll be able to get that Grand Larceny charge after all!"
"There's nothing like getting a bonus for a job well done! Let's do it!"
Meanwhile, Jessie, James, and Persian had managed to sneak their way to the docks. Unfortunately for them, they found it full of activity. It seemed that a confrontation was inevitable, as a large faction of Rocket Grunts had emerged from the shadows. And they had their eyes on the workers bringing their cargo ashore... and the police officers that had sworn to make sure said cargo got to its destination.
"Goooooo!" shouted the Grunts, who tossed out their Pokéballs for battle.
"We won't let you take any of it!" the officers shouted back, tossing their Pokéballs out as well.
A giant melee broke out, with the shipmates running for cover with their cargo as some officers raced to escort them out of harm's way, while others tried to hold off the enemy. Seeing all of the action, Jessie, James, and Persian ran for a better vantage point.
Behind a large stack of unused wooden barrels.
"What's this?" Jessie thought out loud, peering through a crack between two barrels.
"Looks like a donnybrook," James replied.
"I don't know no Donny or Brook, but that's one big scuffle dey's havin' over dere!" Persian exclaimed.
"So... any ideas as to how to get on that ship without getting seen?"
"Wait a minute! Do you guys hear what I hear?"
Jessie and Persian both quieted down so they could catch a hint of what James was referring to. There seemed to be something coming towards them. Something engine-powered.
"A pick-up truck?" James said out loud as said truck came to a stop right in front of their hiding place.
James was about to emerge from the barrels to check it out, but was pulled back by his teammates as they heard a second engine-powered vehicle approach... this one accompanied by the sound of a siren.
It was Officer Jenny, and she gawked in disbelief over what was unfolding on the docks.
"What's all this then?" she yelled as she hopped off her bike.
Seeing Pokémon battles all over the place and her squadrons stretched thin to the point where the Rocket Grunts were gaining an advantage, Jenny had decided that she had seen enough. She reached for her belt and threw out the six Pokéballs that had been attached to it.
"Pokémon Riot Squadron, go!"
Out of the Pokéballs came three Arcanine and three Gastly. Together, these six formed the world's only official Pokémon Riot Squadron!
"Let's move out, team!" Jenny ordered.
The six of them complied, running to different parts of the 'battle zone' in an attempt to bring control of the situation back over to Jenny's forces. Officer Jenny herself ran over to help, leaving the truck driver and his two Machamp alone with the 'important package.'
Not that Jessie, James, and Persian knew about them.
"I bet whatever they're delivering is pretty valuable if it requires police protection," reasoned Jessie.
"Then what do you say we hitch a ride?" suggested James.
"We make some dough while we enjoy an ocean cruise!" Persian said with a smile. "Sounds like a plan to me!"
"Yeah!" the trio cheered in unison as they slithered out of their hiding spot.
"Hold it right there!" yelled a familiar voice.
"Gack!" Jessie blurted out, stopping in her tracks, with her two partners doing likewise.
"We'll be taking it from here," added a second familiar.
Jessie, James, and Persian glanced up the street, just beyond the rear of the pickup truck. They gasped in shock as they saw Jane and Calamity walking up, with eyes focused on the same crate Jessie and James had been eyeballing.
"Did they spot us?"
"That's it! It's all over!"
"Prepare for trouble!" Jane exclaimed.
"And make it double!" Calamity stated, likewise.
"To introduce the world to devastation!"
"To love our team and unite our nation!"
"To denounce the values known as truth and love!"
"To extend our knowledge to the stars above!"
"Jane!"
"Calamity!"
"Team Rocket, the best when stealing Pokémon is right!"
"Surrender now, or prepare for a fight!"
"Machamp?" uttered the two guards, who hopped off of the truck in order to block the Rockets' path.
"You have some real nerve, trying to steal this thing," the truck driver said, emerging from his seat inside.
"That's what Team Rocket is full of," Jane smiled, sinister-like.
"We've got real nerve and we're not afraid to use it!"
"You aren't getting this! Not if I have anything to say about it! Okay, Machamp, use Karate Chop and Low Kick!"
"Champ!" the two Machamp shouted as they charged at Jane and Calamity.
"Pinsir, go with Vicegrip!" Jane shouted, tossing out a Pokéball.
Calamity followed suit. "Kabuto, protect yourself with Harden!"
As the four Pokémon waged war against each other, Jessie, James, and Persian stealthily climbed into the truck's flatbed and tried to forcibly open the crate.
"What's wrong with this thing?" Jessie asked, pulling with all her might.
"It's nailed on there tight!" exclaimed James.
"Dey super glue dis thing or what?" gasped Persian.
"Forget this!" Jessie said, giving up. "We've got more important things to worry about!"
"Like getting out of here with our lives?"
"Precisely."
The trio jumped off the other side of the truck and started to make their way towards the water. But, out of the corner of his eye, Calamity spotted Jessie's extravagant hair... or the backside of it, anyway.
"Eleven o'clock," Calamity told Jane, who was focused solely on the battle.
"Really? Who would've thought?"
"Machamp, Seismic Toss!"
"Kabuto, dodge it!"
"You too, Pinsir!"
The two Pokémon followed orders, dodging the reach of the two Machamp.
"These stupid Machamp are in our way!"
"We'll have to rely on the others to get those losers."
What Jane didn't know, though, was that the others were in the midst of a massive battle of their own, as Rocket Grunts and police officers and their Pokémon were still trading blows with each other. So much so that they were all too distracted to see Jessie, James, and Persian making their way towards the cargo steamer. But they changed their minds when they realized there was no way to get to it without being spotted. So, they started looking for another escape route.
Lucky for them, the escape route decided to find them.
"Last call for the ferry to Olivine City!" a man on the docks yelled at the top of his lungs.
"That's it!" Jessie said excitedly. "That's our ticket outta here!"
"But we don't have tickets, Jess!" objected James.
"When has dat ever stopped us?" corrected Persian.
"Somebody stop those losers!" Jane barked, trying to gain one of the other Grunt's attention.
"What are you blabberin' about, you salty wench?" questioned the truck driver as his Machamp continued to hold up Pinsir and Kabuto.
"I have no idea what that means, but I hate the way you said it, you crazy islander!"
"They're going to get away!" Calamity spotted matter-of-factly.
The trio were indeed going to escape... if not for one problem.
"No tickets?" the bellower on the docks told them, "No ride!"
"Please!" pleaded Jessie, dropping down on her knees. "We'll do anything!"
"We'll work for peanuts!" begged James, following suit.
"Screw peanuts!" Persian stated, also on his knees. "We'll work for nothing if you want us to!"
The attendant smiled at Persian's plea. "Well, we are in need of some temp help with most of the at-sea cleaning crew on vacation. Alright... get aboard so we can get the heck out of here!"
"Aye aye, sir!" the three of them saluted before they bolted towards the ship's boarding plank.
A short minute later, the ship's foghorn blew as the plank was pulled aboard, the anchor was drawn out of the water, and the ship itself slowly started to pull away from the docks. Jessie, James, and Persian took it upon themselves, albeit a bit foolishly, to run to the stern and take a glance back at the ongoing battle.
"Who do ya think is winning?" Persian asked curiously.
"I don't care," Jessie replied, "as long as they keep fighting amongst themselves, they're giving us time to get away!"
"We're going to live to fight another day!" James cried.
Back on shore, the two Machamp had just been knocked out by Pinsir and Kabuto. Instinctively, the truck driver ran to protect the contents of the crate. But instead of going after him, Jane and Calamity immediately headed for the sea.
"Where the hell did they go?" Jane angrily growled as she focused her search on the ships docked in port.
"They're probably on that ferry!" deduced Calamity, as he pointed towards the lone vessel leaving Trovitopolis at the time.
"We need a flying Pokémon to follow them!"
"Or a water Pokémon to swim after!"
"Hey!" the two turned towards their fellow Grunts. "Somebody lend us a Pokémon or two!"
Unfortunately, the Grunts were in no condition to help, as most had either been tied up, knocked out, or were struggling to hold off the plethora of officers circling them. Not occupied, though, were Officer Jenny and the Pokémon Riot Squadron.
"Wait a..." Jenny gasped, recognizing Jane and Calamity instantly, "you're those two Team Rocket members that escaped from the Maximum Security Prison!"
"Crap!" cursed Jane. "You think we can handle her six?"
"In a moment, it'll be sixty," answered Calamity, referring to the other officers, who were almost done corralling the Grunts.
"WE'RE BLASTING OFF AGAIN!" the two yelled, bolting in the other direction as fast as their legs could carry them, Pinsir and Kabuto tailing close behind.
"Halt! You're under arrest!" Jenny shouted, chasing after them with the Pokémon Riot Squadron in tow.
At that point, the ship was so far from the shoreline that Jessie, James, and Persian could not make anybody out clearly anymore.
"I guess they're not sending anyone after us," Jessie thought aloud.
"Which means it's smooth sailing from here to Olivine!" James shouted joyfully.
"Looks like this faction of Team Rocket..." Persian began.
"Is blasting off to safety!" the trio finished together.
Jessie, James, and Persian had once again escaped the clutches of their former employer, assuring themselves of another day in the world of the living.
But are their days really numbered? You'll have to stay tuned to find out!
"Hey, wait a minute!" Persian cut in. "What about the bit about me hating myself as a Persian?"
"GET OVER IT ALREADY!" Jessie and James shouted at him.
To be continued next week in Part 4!
