Grozny Grad was a secret base which developed Soviet superweapons so dangerous, not even the Soviets were aware of them. It was overlooked by a rocky cliff. The cliff gave an excellent view of the various defences of the base, such as tanks, watchtowers, anti-aircraft missiles, and constant guard patrols.
It was quite fortunate for our next three heroes that they were afforded such a commanding view of the base. That said, for Zeke Dunbar, the landing was uncomfortable.
Upon arrival, Zeke looked at the man next to him to see a tall figure in black with a smiling, porcelain face. Zeke yelped, and turned around. He was greeted by a man, taller still, in a suit of grey armour, outfitted with a variety of firearms and glowing red eyes. Zeke screamed a second time, pulled out his revolver, and yelled in a Southern accent "Just what in the hell is all this?!"
War Machine and V looked each other up and down, ignoring the excitable man with sunglasses, a blue jacket, and a quiff of black hair.
"You know what's going on?" asked War Machine, his deep voice made metallic by his armour.
"My comrade, your confusion is completely corresponding to my own," said V.
War Machine nodded. He wasn't one for wasting time, so he stated, "My name's Colonel Jim Rhodes. They call me the War Machine."
V bowed and removed his wide-brimmed hat. "An immense pleasure making your introduction, Colonel."
"My name's Zeke Dunbar," said the man in sunglasses, forcing himself to calm down. "You fellas ever hear of the Electric Man? I'm his right hand guy, as it were."
"I'm afraid I've accidentally avoided his acquaintance," said V. "As for myself, I don't think this is an occasion for the full speech, so allow me to summarize by saying that it is my very good pleasure to meet you both and you may call me V."
Zeke went to replace his revolver. His hand brushed against his pocket and he felt something alien in it. He reached in and produced a letter. "Huh. Lookee here, a letter."
He handed it to V, who read it. "This notifies us that there nests a ne'er-do-well nether..." Here V nodded to the base. "... and we must nobly end this nefarious knave known as Wesker."
War Machine nodded to himself. "Well, okay. There's just one problem with that." He pointed down to the anti-aircraft guns in the base. "I could just fly in and shoot him, except for the fact those guns would blow me to pieces."
Zeke wiped his brow and frowned down at Grozny Grad. "Hmm. Those guns would need a lotta juice. If I can find the main power supply of the base, I'd be able to switch it off no problem, and then you'd be clear."
"The complex is chillingly cautious," said V, "but I can creep in without copious difficulty, and could cater your inclination to come inside and commence creating chaos."
"Did... you just say you could help me sneak in?" queried Zeke.
V tilted his head quizzically. "That's exactly what I said."
"Sounds like a plan then," said War Machine. "You two sneak inside and take out the power. Then I'll come in and take care of Wesker."
"I'm not that happy about taking orders from someone in the military," sniffed Zeke, "but hell, I don't have much choice."
"I share your anti-authority sentiments," said V soothingly, "but in this situation they simply don't apply." They made to descend towards Grozny Grad.
"Wait, before you go," War Machine called to Zeke. "You said you're good with electronics?"
"I guess so."
War Machine removed something from his suit and handed it to Zeke. "It's a long walk down to the base. Could you maybe take a look at this for me? I think it's a problem with the wiring."
Zeke turned the device over in his hand. "Well, I dunno what I can do for ya, but I'll give it a shot."
War Machine nodded. "Thanks a lot."
"Gentlemen," coughed V. "Grozny Grad is eager to greet us."
"Great," grimaced Zeke.
"General Iroh?"
Iroh had been sitting on deck, admiring the view of the desert's undulating sand dunes. He looked up from his tea to see the young man who had arrived on the ship yesterday. He examined Iroh with his dark eyes, his hands in his pockets.
"Yes, that's me," smiled Iroh warmly. "Although I don't think I've had the pleasure to be introduced to you yet."
The man didn't return his smile. "You can call me L, general." He squatted down so that he was at the same level as Iroh. "Back home, I'm someone who solves mysteries. And we've just been thrown into a rather large one."
"That's putting it lightly."
L gazed out into the desert. "Considering our lack of specialised equipment," he murmured in his monotone, "there is a 84% probability of being unable to understand our situation, at least currently. Still, I wouldn't feel at ease with myself unless we tried."
"Sometimes an attempt is the only thing one can hope for," said Iroh.
"In my investigations of the people who have appeared thus far, others spoke highly of your wisdom," said L. "It's also clear from your movements, and that cast on your arm, that you want to help out but feel there's no role open to you. I'm offering you a role."
Iroh's gold eyes met L's black. "And that is?"
L stood. "Come to the boardroom, and we'll discuss things."
"Why can't you tell me here?"
L stared at him. "I just did," he said. "We're going to go the boardroom, and then discuss things. That's my idea."
"I know," chuckled Iroh. "I just wanted to see your reaction."
War Machine sat on the cliff, watching his team-mates progress through Grozny Grad. Relegated to the sidelines, he amused himself by fiddling with the various features of his suit. Having already established a radio connection to Zeke's walkie-talkie, he was now aimlessly adjusting the frequency to see if he could pick anything else up.
To his own surprise, a harsh and husky voice suddenly burst on to his radio. "-ust ensuring that everything is progressing as I instructed."
"Y-yes, Dr Wesker." replied a frightened voice. Rhodes' eyes widened. "We had to change the designs quite a bit in order to facilitate your requests, but we're back to work at our usual pace. The Shagohod will be ready to launch your modified missiles by tomorrow."
"Excellent. I will remain here if you should need to contact me. Get back to work. And remember, report any suspicious activity to security immediately. I don't want these prowlers interrupting my work. The world will be saturated."
"Um... yes sir, Doctor."
The connection cut out. War Machine nodded to himself, and began quickly dialling his radio frequency back to its starting point.
##
Two guards were patrolling Grozny Grad along the same route. One rubbed his arm pitifully through his uniform of green camouflage. His colleague rolled his eyes under his black balaclava.
"Don't be such a baby," he muttered in Russian.
"It hurts!" protested the second. "Why did we have to get injections anyway?"
"Because the new boss said so."
"Yeah, but why?"
"Look, I-" The first guard started. "Shh! Hear that?"
The two guards turned a corner to see a cardboard box sitting by itself in the middle of the courtyard. They shared a look as they approached. One kicked the box, and it swore in an American accent.
"An intruder!" is what one guard began to exclaim, but found himself unable to, due to the knife which suddenly embedded itself through the back of his neck.
Both guards fell away from V, who had executed them silently and simultaneously. Zeke stood up and discarded the box. V tilted his head at him.
"It seemed like a good idea!" snapped Zeke. V merely shook his head, turned, and began walking.
Zeke's walkie-talkie buzzed. He unstrapped it from his belt and brought it to his ear.
"Zeke here."
War Machine's voice crackled clearly on the speaker. "Zeke, I just intercepted a conversation between Wesker and a Scientist. He's in the main building and doesn't seem to be aware of our presence. If you cut the power, he'll probably come out into the courtyard."
"Ten four," replied Zeke, as he watched V gracefully slit the throat of yet another guard.
"While I have you, you made any progress on the… project?"
Zeke grinned despite the fact Rhodey couldn't see him. "Oh yeah, did I ever. It's right as rain and raring to go. But I should point out I also added a timer. Just a little security."
"Good to hear. And a timer might be smart. Give it back to me when we rendezvous, and I'll use it if things get tight. Over and out."
"Talk to you later, Colonel Gunbucket."
With that Zeke replaced his walkie-talkie and ran up to where V was waiting.
"Was the caller our cliff-based companion?" inquired the anarchist.
"Sure was. Says Wesker's in the main building and'll probably come out when I work my magic on the power grid."
V mulled this over. "An immediate assassination attempt on my part would be… inadequate. Wiser perhaps to wait for the unwearied War Machine."
"Um, yeah," said Zeke. "My thoughts exactly. Hey, how much longer til the power supply?"
V pointed his knife towards a nearby building. "Therein is our target."
"Hellacious," smiled Zeke. "Time to get some wires crossed."
Heavy had left the med bay with a refreshed constitution and a spring in his step, singing the praises of Doktor Ninja and Cat. Upon discharge, he had hefted Sasha and went exploring. He was in a lower level of the ship when the sound of gunfire caught his attention.
He came into a large hangar at the front of the ship. Colonel O'Neill was standing on one side of the room, firing his pistol at targets he had set up on the other. Behind him, three small aircraft sat in disuse.
When O'Neill saw Heavy enter the room, he put the safety on his gun and nodded him inside. Heavy inspected the targets as he walked to O'Neill.
"What is this?" he asked.
"Just a little something to keep my accuracy sharp," answered O'Neill. "Besides, this is the room furthest away from the guy fixing the engines."
Heavy gave him a questioning look, and Jack explained "I just can't shake the feeling that soon the whole place will be crawling with Scientists." He spoke the last word with an emphasis which, while not hostile, wasn't especially friendly either.
Heavy nodded, but in a way that indicated he didn't really share Jack's opinion. "Can I join little shooting club?" he asked.
O'Neill looked the giant Russian man and his equally oversized firearm up and down.
"Sure, I don't see why not," he said.
V's viscous voice came smoothly on to War Machine's radio. "Colonel?"
"I read you."
"Both facility and faculty are powerless. Please proceed."
War Machine stood up and surveyed the base with his glowing red eyes. "Ready or not, here I come."
He threw himself off of the cliff. The thrusters in his palms and soles activated, sending him flying gracefully through the air. He shot towards Grozny Grad like a sentient missile. A gatling gun opened out from his shoulder, and a targeting computer activated alongside it. Swooping low to the ground, he tore through guards, machinery, vehicles and buildings alike with a seemingly limitless stream of searing lead.
The base personnel tried raising the alarm, but nothing happened. Their systems were based on the power grid Zeke had just disabled, and the backup generator was slow to activate.
War Machine wreaked massive destruction on the base. One guard bravely fired an RPG at him. War Machine dodged it briskly, and shot it out of the sky for good measure. Then, he landed next to the guard, lifted him by the throat, and threw him at a wall.
Zeke and V came out of the power plant, which War Machine had coincidentally landed beside, and surveyed the damage. "Damn, nice going!" said Zeke appreciatively, as one of the base's watchtowers collapsed with a pitiful metallic groan. "The base isn't bouncing back from that one!"
"The complex is not our concern," said V. "Rather, its commander."
As if to underline his point, the backup generator activated at this point. The alarm sprung to life, sending a shrill bell sound piercing through the air. War Machine, V and Zeke drew their various weapons as guards surrounded them.
"Why aren't they shooting?" asked Zeke.
"Isn't it obvious?" murmured War Machine. "So that he can gloat."
Wesker appeared in the doorway of a nearby building and strode toward them unhurriedly. During the time he approached them, the trio studied his appearance intently. He was wearing black clothes; specifically, black trousers, black shoes, a black shirt, and a long black leather coat. The sunlight gleamed off his thin black sunglasses as he ran a gloved hand – also black – through his short blond hair.
"Huh," said War Machine. "The guys I'm used to are usually a little less monochrome." He paused. "Half of them still look less ridiculous, though."
"V, before we all die," said Zeke, "I think it's worth mentioning your clothes are way cooler than his."
"I appreciate your praise, Zeke. In a similar sentiment, I surmise your sunglasses are superior to this sinister Scientist's."
"Now you're just showing off," murmured Rhodes.
Wesker finally arrived within speaking distance of the three. He stood calmly and with a rigid posture. "So," he said, almost conversationally. "You are the three who would seek to thwart my saturation of the world."
"Your what?" asked Zeke, a look of confused disgust on his face.
"You're half right," said War Machine. "Really, we want to kill you. I guess stopping your... whatever you're doing..."
"Saturation of the world."
"Yeah, that. I suppose stopping that would be a side effect, yes."
Wesker nodded. "Well, that's not going to happen. As long as this base stays standing, the entire world will soon be engulfed in my virus. And since there's some poetry in it, please allow me to give you an opening demonstration." Wesker produced a vial from a coat pocket and threw in on the ground. Zeke fearfully clapped his hand over his nose and mouth. "Relax, dullard," said Wesker. "That was merely a catalyst. The real virus -"
"Is percolating within your poor personnel," muttered V venomously.
Wesker adjusted his sunglasses. "You catch on quickly."
Their conversation was interrupted by a pained cry. One of the guards twitched violently and doubled over, as though trying to vomit. When he straightened his back again, the visible skin of his face was unnaturally grey. He reached forward with both arms, groaning, and began to shuffle towards the three.
"Holy shit!" swore Zeke. "Zombies!"
"Aaaauugh," said War Machine flatly. "He dropped his automatic weapon and is coming towards us incredibly slowly. I'm terrified." He raised an arm and fired a single machine-gun bullet between the zombie's eyes. It fell forward, dead. "Oh wait. No I'm not."
"Yeah, well, it's easy for you to say that. It's not like they can bite you," sniffed Zeke, raising his revolver.
Every guard was turning at different rates, but soon there was a small army of zombies bearing down on the three.
"Too easy," chuckled War Machine. He prepared the two machine-guns built into his arms and sent his gatling gun unfurling out of his shoulder. He then aimed in three different directions. "I'll deal with this in a matter of -"
As he spoke, Wesker leaped toward him and slapped him in the side of the head. War Machine was thrown to the side by the force of the blow, and landed awkwardly.
He grunted. "Guess that guy is stronger than he looks. Way stronger." He raised an arm and tried firing at Wesker, but the Scientist dodged his bullets, moving at an inhuman speed.
Wesker sped towards Zeke, who was concentrating on the zombies. V suddenly blocked his path, holding a dagger forward, and Wesker was unable to stop in time, stabbing himself on the blade.
"Perhaps I am a more appropriate potential opponent?" he suggested. Wesker growled and knocked him off his feet.
War Machine threw off a zombie who was ineffectually gnawing on his armour. "Zeke!" he yelled. "Now would be a good time!" He flew up to Zeke and took back the item he'd given him before. Then Zeke covered War Machine as the soldier loaded it into his shoulder.
Wesker lifted V by the throat, then dropped him to the ground. "You think you can stop me?" he growled. "You are insects, and I am a god. I will crush you, for I am superior to you in every-" Wesker's dramatic speech was cut off by War Machine firing a projectile from his shoulder, which embedded itself in Wesker's chest. It looked like a tiny missile; or, perhaps, a huge bullet. Wesker regarded it as it fizzed ominously, and then turned his attention to War Machine.
War Machine grinned under his helmet. He had won. Now all he had to do was spout off a witty line, like Tony always did. He made it look so easy.
"Um," he said, "bye."
With that War Machine scooped up Zeke and shot into the sky, moving as fast as his thrusters could carry him.
"Was that seriously the best you could do?" asked Zeke dubiously.
"Shut up or I drop you," growled Rhodes.
Wesker watched them go passively. He tore the missile out of his chest and inspected it. It beeped at him. Wesker quickly worked out War Machine's velocity and the angle and force Wesker would have to throw the bomb were it to intercept him. Wesker aimed, stretched his arm back, and threw.
It sailed menacingly through the air – for half a second. Then a large black blur came from below and enveloped it. V landed smartly, clutching the Ex-Wife missile.
"I deny you this," said V, "and damn us both to death."
Wesker snarled at him. He whirled around, coat fluttering behind him, and started sprinting away. V caught up to him, with great effort, and grabbed his ankle. Wesker fell and his face slammed into the ground. He went to kick V in the face. V lifted the Ex-Wife so that Wesker's foot crushed it.
It detonated.
Even from the high altitude they had gained, Rhodes and Zeke felt the reverberations of the massive explosion beneath them. They watched silently as the blast engulfed the entire base. The zombified guards moaned at it piteously as it consumed them. Eventually, there was nothing left below them but a wide, empty expanse.
War Machine slowly floated down, and landed softly. Zeke disentangled himself from the soldier's grip and walked slowly to where the Ex-Wife had detonated. There wasn't a scrap of black fabric, leather or cloth, to be seen. Simply bare concrete.
"Shit," Zeke said quietly. "I... guess that's it."
"Is this the first time you've lost a soldier?" asked War Machine.
Zeke shook his head. "I wish."
They stood for a few moments in the silent waste. They suddenly found themselves on the bridge of the ship. War Machine raised his two machine-gun arms defensively, while Zeke just looked around confusedly.
Deadpool had set up a desk and was doodling with a Hello Kitty pen. He glanced up. "Ah, right on time! Hi Rhodey. Lemme just make a note..."
"I am so confused right now," said Zeke. "The hell is this clown?"
"I know him," said Rhodes, "and that only makes things more confusing."
"Machine, first name, War," Deadpool was murmuring to himself. "And your name, sir? Is it Elvis? It better be, I'm calling you that."
"Zeke Dunbar," muttered Zeke.
"And your third guy is..." Deadpool looked up again. "...Invisible?"
War Machine and Zeke shared a look. "Dead," War Machine said bluntly.
"Dead?"
"Dead!" snapped Zeke. "Christ."
"It's just," Deadpool said, frowning down on the list of names he had, "no-one else died."
"No-one else?" asked Rhodes pointedly.
Deadpool laughed nervously. "Now, see, I have good news and bad news..."
Have you good news or bad news? I'll accept either, if it's sent via review!
