Sly, Ratchet, Clank and Jak picked their way through the rubble. After determining Iroh was stable, they had made their way around to the other side of the ship. They avoided the showdown they could hear being waged nearby. Although they were all usually more than willing to fight, Jak's recounting of Maleficent's powers had given them pause. A good battle is one thing; a suicide mission is another.

A voice came onto Sly's Binocucom. "Sly! Do you read me?"

"Bentley?"

"Thank goodness you're still alive! I was so worried!"

"Same here! Where are you?"

"I've positioned myself on the top of what's left of the ship. I've been observing Maleficent battle, and I believe I have some pertinent information."

"I'm all ears, pal."

"For reasons I do not and may never comprehend, Maleficent can kill people instantly with a burst of green flame. She focuses this attack on powerful opponents, such as Aang or Thor."

"So far, so hopeless."

"The interesting thing is that she doesn't use this tactic on people she sees as less of a threat – she barely pays attention to them."

"Wait, let me guess. If I look like I can't take her in a fight..."

"She won't kill you on sight. And that may be the difference between life and death."

"Thanks, buddy. I can always rely on you for a plan."

"And I can always rely on you to save the day. I'm moving in to extract Murray. Wish me luck."

"Of course. I'll see you all soon."

Sly lowered his Binocucom. The others looked at him expectantly.

"Well?" asked Ratchet.

"That was Bentley. He said that Maleficent doesn't use the Death Note on people she doesn't see as threats."

"And what do you intend to do with this information?" queried Clank.

Sly looked out over the rubble. Both Aang and Thor, their two gods, were down. Maleficent was amusing herself by picking up Deadpool and beating him off the ground.

"I'm going to walk up to her and distract her," he said.

"What?!" exploded Jak.

"Nuh-uh. Nope. Not letting you do that," said Ratchet.

"We can formulate a better plan!" protested Clank.

"Aren't you the one always going on about team-work?" said Jak.

"Yeah, I am," replied Sly. "I understand the importance of my friends. Which is why I'm not going to risk getting you guys killed."

"Come on! We can back you up!" yelled Ratchet.

"Brute force isn't working," countered Sly. "It's not slowing her down. All it does is cause more people to die. We can't beat her until the guys get the Anti-Magic machine, and they clearly need more time. Time I'm going to give them."

Ratchet and Jak shared an uneasy look. "Are you absolutely sure you want to do this?" asked Jak.

Sly looked around. He saw the wreckage of the ship. He saw the bodies, both injured and unmoving. He saw the destruction.

"Absolutely," he replied.

"Then I guess we can't stop you," sighed Ratchet. "And I can't give you a gun or else would be a threat."

Sly moved his arm. "I'm not sure I could use one of your guns anyway."

Jak nodded to him. "Good luck, Cooper. Do what you can."

"We have the utmost confidence in you," said Clank.

"Good to know," smiled Sly. "Stay out of sight. Try to see if you can help anyone. I'll meet you guys after we win."

Sly turned and began to walk towards Maleficent. Ratchet called after him.

"Hey Sly?" Sly stopped. "This is still more enjoyable than the alien fiasco."

Jak groaned. "Why would you even mention that at a time like this?"

Sly shot a grin back to Ratchet. Then, he continued onward, closing in on the sound of breaking bones.


"Augh! The fire! My armour does nothing!"

Caboose limped through the flaming corridors of the Halberd. Loki's staff had certainly stung, and the fire licking at his armour was hotter than he assumed it would be. He threw himself the last few feet towards a section of hallway which wasn't aflame, and rolled on the floor until the burning stopped.

Picking himself up, he scanned his smoke-filled surroundings. He made out out the shape of someone lying unconscious ahead of him.

"Oh no!" he said aloud, for little reason. "If that person doesn't wake up, they'll get on fire. And then naptime will be ruined...! And also they'd die!" He walked up to the figure and easily hefted their slight weight onto his strong blue shoulders, despite his injuries. "Don't worry, I'll save you," Caboose reassured his charge. He took off down the corridor, running towards the nearest exit.

"Aw man, everyone's going to be so proud of me for saving this kitty!" said Caboose happily. On his shoulders, Scar mumbled in his sleep.


"So?" Rhodes asked Dr Horrible, as the latter examined the Anti-Magic Field Generator. "What's the word?"

Horrible narrowed his eyes. "Well, the machine appears to be in full working order. But the battery's missing!"

"What?! Where is it!?" yelled Phoenix.

"You think I know?" Horrible shot back.

"It's probably somewhere here," said Skulduggery sardonically, gesturing to the large flaming carcass of the ship. "You check the cupboards, I'll check under the couch."

Rhodes thought for a moment, and suddenly removed his helmet. "Help me get out of this armour!" he yelled. Phoenix and Skulduggery aided him in pulling off the chest piece, and once this was accomplished Rhodes popped the Arc Reactor out and offered the circular energy source to Horrible. "This should do the trick," he said. "It keeps my whole suit powered, so a little thing like that should be nothing to it."

Horrible took the reactor and hurriedly scanned it for power outputs. He then pulled down his goggles and began work connecting it to the Field Generator.

Skulduggery shifted impatiently. "Can you hurry it up a bit?"

"I'm trying to use my Science to Science another man's Science into a third man's Science," snapped Horrible, "and it's proving to be pretty un-Scientific!"

"Can you be a little more specific?"

Horrible's eye twitched under his goggles. "This device runs on Raritanium. We don't have Raritanium, but we do have this reactor thing, which will have plenty of power. It's just a matter of adjusting the power output of the Reactor, and the power input of the Field Generator, in such a way that neither explode into little pieces when we connect them."

"We had an entire room of electrical engineers who rewired the whole ship," Phoenix noted, "which was ultimately pointless. Now, it's vitally important to wire one tiny thing into another tiny thing, and we only have one guy on hand to do it."

Skulduggery shook his head. "Sure isn't that always the way?"

From the floor, Layton cleared his throat. "Detective Pleasant, you do realize that when we activate this device, we're deactivating you. There's no telling whether you'll reanimate afterwards or not."

Skulduggery looked at him steadily. "I'm aware. But if this is your best chance of victory..."

Rhodes grimaced. "It's our only chance of victory."

"Exactly," nodded Skulduggery. "... Then who am I to stop you? Besides," he added, his tone slightly more jovial, "this still beats half of the plans I come up with." He produced his phone. "I'm going to make a call. Good luck getting it to work." He strode away.

"There!" yelled Horrible triumphantly after a time. He stepped back from his work, showing the Arc Reactor tentatively plugged into the AMFG's power supply. "I'm done."

"Don't waste time," ordered Rhodes. "Turn it on."

Dr Horrible reached over to the switch, silently pleading with the machine not to break. He flicked in on and set the dial to the maximum setting.

There was a terse silence. "I don't feel anything," said Phoenix.

"Are you magic?" asked Horrible.

"No."

"Then you wouldn't, would you?" said Rhodes bluntly.

Layton exhaled softly and leaned against a wall. "We can only hope that we've been successful," he said. "It's out of our hands now."


Sly approached Maleficent slowly, fully on his guard. She was still beating Deadpool against the ground, seemingly still amused by it. Stranger yet was the fact that Deadpool, too, was laughing.

"I can do this aaaaaaaall day, lady," he taunted. "Oop, my leg just broke. Again. Guess I'll never be able to walk again – oh wait! Hahahah! Oh hai Sly," he said, noticing the raccoon. "'Sup?"

"Ah, Mr Cooper," said Maleficent, allowing Deadpool to float in midair. "How nice of you to join us."

"Hello to you too," said Sly, shifting his injured arm.

"Come on!" said Deadpool. "You and me, we can take her! Let's work togethAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Maleficent abruptly shot Deadpool upwards. Sly watched the screaming mercenary fly merrily into the air, until he disappeared into the darkness far above with a twinkle.

"Not that I should be encouraging use of your kill-stick, but... why didn't you just kill him?" asked Sly.

"He tried to punch me in the face," said Maleficent bluntly. "Death is too good for him. I need to torture him far more before I can do him such an honour."

"Of course," frowned Sly.

Maleficent stretched her arms. "Please. Allow me to guess. You have a speech."

"As it happens, I do have a few words prepared."

Maleficent rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Be swift. I retain the right to strike you down mid-sentence."

"Understood," said Sly, eyeing up a large chunk of debris near him, wondering if he could fit behind it at a moment's notice. "I just thought you might like to know why we've won."

"You haven't won," said Maleficent, half amused.

"Oh, but we have. We did from the beginning. There are two men – and a robot – back there I had to beg not to follow me. It's a good thing I didn't have to restrain them, because they would have won. They wanted to stick by me, even knowing what you can do with that notebook."

"And?"

"And, it goes much further than that. That's just one way we stand up for each other. We've been working together since day one. We heal our wounded, we console our grieving, and we make sure we all get out in one piece. Whereas everyone you sent fought alone. And they lost alone too."

"Which will make it all the greater when I win, alone," said Maleficent. "You call it teamwork, I call it weakness."

"Clockwerk once told me that empathy had always been the downfall of my family," replied Sly. "But his boast seems a lot less powerful when you consider the fact that right now, he's sitting inactive in the desert, thanks to the selfless actions of two people accurately described as heroes."

Maleficent rolled her eyes. "Yes, yes. You'd all take a bullet for each other. But look around, Cooper. There's no-one nearby to take the bullet I've written your name on."

"No, I don't suppose there is," said Sly. "Not nearby."

Maleficent gave him a triumphant glare. "You have been a pain in my side for far too long. Now, this ends."

"Yes," said Sly gravely. "It does."

Maleficent raised her staff and aimed it at Sly's face. They stared each other down for a few moments, and then with a shout of rage Maleficent fired.

Nothing happened.

They stood in silence for a few seconds. Maleficent experimentally tried firing again, and then a third time. There was still no response.

Maleficent stared down first at her staff, and then the Death Note, shock and rage clear on her face. The green flames had been extinguished. She looked at Sly. He smiled innocently at her.

There were a few more seconds silence. And then, Maleficent smiled back. Sly's grin widened and so did Maleficent's. Then, she laughed quietly. Sly joined her. This slowly escalated. Before long the two were laughing like old friends, their shaking the only movement among the shattered remains of the Halberd.

"I told you!" Sly chuckled, leaning on a pile of splintered wood.

"Yes," smiled Maleficent. "You did." Within the space of an instant her smile evaporated into a scowl of pure fury and with one clean stroke she slammed her staff into Sly's face like a baseball bat. The glass tip shattered, leaving a jagged end and several small cuts on Sly's face.

Sly cried out in pain, but recovered quickly. Maleficent was charging at him, intent on beating him to death. Sly quickly hooked his cane around her staff and managed to push her back. She came at him again, staff swinging upwards. He nimbly stepped back.

"You're not going to win," he said. "I'm better at brawling than you'd ever be." Maleficent didn't respond with words, instead making her point by viciously striking Sly's broken arm. He grunted and backed away.

They fought for what seemed like hours, but was in actuality barely minutes. One, injured and tired, the other furious and completely inexperienced at this kind of battle. They were an even match, roughly, but Sly was certain he would win out.

It was to his dismay, then, when he tripped over a piece of debris and landed heavily on his back. His cane fell out of his reach, and before he could stand up again, the jagged glass of Maleficent's staff was bearing down on his throat. Sly grabbed it with his good hand, and with difficulty managed to keep it away from his neck.

"You've... lost... anyway," he pointed out. "You can't defend your...self from the... others."

"Perhaps not." Maleficent's smile was twisted and far beyond reason. "Perhaps my time has finally come. But by Hell, I am taking you with me."

Sly watched as, despite his best efforts, the sharp gleaming glass gradually approached his throat.

But then, the silence was broken by an odd noise. Sly looked up to see a crossbow bolt had hit Maleficent in her hand.

The sorceress paled, staring at her wound. She dropped of her staff, and Sly wasted no time in crawling away. He threw his head in the direction the bolt had come from, wondering who had saved him.

The moonlight shimmered on his saviour's armour. He was holding a crossbow, but he holstered this and took out a golden sword. There was a hole in his shirt, but the flesh underneath it was completely unharmed. He stepped closer, and Sly could see the good natured smile Hype bore despite the carnage around him.

Maleficent stared at him, cradling her hand. "The knight," she murmured disbelievingly. "He lives."

Hype smiled down at Sly and offered him his hand. Sly took it and stood. Then, Hype focused his attention on Maleficent. His expression hardened, and he walked towards her, sword held high.

Maleficent looked prepared to fight, but then she seemed to resign herself to her fate. "That's a powerful sword," she noted quietly. "Even without its magic, I recognize its strength. Has it a name?"

"The Sword of Peace," said Hype calmly.

Maleficent nodded to herself. "Sword of Peace. Sword of Truth. Swords of goodness." She looked to Hype, and then to Sly. "There's no point denying it. I am defenceless. Cooper... you win."

"Are you surrendering?" asked Sly.

Maleficent laughed hollowly. "Me? Surrender? Oh, what a thought. No. I don't surrender. Let the cowards who served me surrender to you if they wish. I am merely going to face my demise with some decorum."

"Um... thanks?" said Sly. "I'd be more inclined to be respectful to you if you hadn't killed so many people."

"As you wish." Maleficent tossed the Death Note aside disparagingly. Then she calmly met Hype's gaze. "Sir Knight, you may strike when ready."

Hype nodded. Then, he plunged his sword into Maleficent's chest. Sly averted his gaze, uncertain of how a being like Maleficent would die, but quite certain he didn't want to witness it. The scream she emitted was enough by itself.

By the time Sly looked back, there was nothing of Maleficent but an unearthly black puddle on the ground. Hype sheathed his sword and smiled at Sly.

At that moment, a more human scream became audible, growing slowly louder. Hype and Sly turned to see Deadpool slam into the ground from above.

"Ouch," he snapped flatly, as though being ironic. He glanced around, and his gaze landed on Sly.

"Soooo," he said. "We win or what?"


As I first looked around the wreckage, it was hard to stay upbeat. While no doubt some people had survived the events of the past few hours, it was clear that there had been a lot of casualties. I couldn't help but wonder if my friends had made it out okay. Judging from the flaming remains of the ship, I wasn't very confident.

I tried to focus on the here and now to distract myself. Maleficent's corpse, little more than a shadow, was pooled on the ground. Hype, our literal knight in shining armour, stood next to it. His energy and lack of wounds only made me realize all the more how much damage everyone had suffered in such a short amount of time.

The three of us left Maleficent where she lay and began to search for any signs of survivors. I took the Death Note with me; didn't really want to touch the damn thing, but it seemed like a better idea than just leaving it there. The extent of the damage shook me, but Hype's smile never wavered, and Deadpool was naturally being his usual self. Between the two of them, I started to cheer up.

That's when we saw them. Two figures, visible in the darkness because of a familiar blue glow. We ran up to them, eager to see who it was. The result was a pleasant surprise.

Dr McNinja and Cole were both hunched over a figure. Neither looked particularly cheerful – McNinja's coat was dirty, and Cole was bloodied and scorched, not to mention obviously troubled by something – but both of them looked a lot less dead than we'd feared.

Coming close, I saw Cole was healing Toph. She was clearly badly wounded, but something from the way McNinja directed Cole reassured me she'd be completely fine.

Once they had stabilized her, McNinja turned to me. He was businesslike and to the point. He diagnosed me as being fine – fractured arm, soon healed, and lacerations, not serious. He used his tie as a makeshift sling for my arm. Then he shooed me away, saying I was well enough to find people who were worse than I was. I didn't argue. Man had a point.

In all, there were more survivors than the pitiable state of the Halberd would suggest. Heck, a lot of people were less wounded than I was. In the end, we were lucky. Despite it all, we had won. They were gone.

We had a lot ahead of us still, and the losses were heavy. But as I took in the cold night air and the scene illuminated by moonlight and flame, I felt oddly optimistic. Because there's some truths I try to live my life by; truths that this ridiculous adventure have only reinforced.

Firstly, that no matter how strange your life usually is, you can rely on fate to toss you a particularly weird month every so often.

And secondly, everything is easier if you have the right team.


Well. That was fun.

You're probably exhausted after reading through a novel length story (I know, I'm surprised too!), so I'll keep it brief. A story crossing over so many properties is a large undertaking, and I was lucky to have many gifted advisers on standby, most of whom were so knowledgeable on their respective fandoms they didn't need to double-check what they told me and were in of themselves reliable sources. Among them are:

SuperstickmanML: Portal and Professor Layton (who also gets bonus points for his consistent reviewing)

Jakurith: Avatar the Last Airbender

And not the least of which, my sister, friggasdottir: The Avengers films

I'd also like to offer my massive gratitude to Linkara, for being kind enough to retweet the link to this tale on his Twitter feed. You'll notice that in thanks, I spared both he and his compatriots from the gaping jaws of death. It's a give and take in the entertainment industry.

Do you want more? Is there something wrong with you?! I hope the answers to both questions is a tentative "Eh, I guess." I do have a lot of ideas for sequels, many of which I think are really cool and as such am very willing to write for. But don't expect updates any time soon. Two mini-sequels are in the works, and may be written some time over next year. But as the education system closes in ever tighter around me, don't hold your breath for another story of this scope.

In conclusion, I hope this story about death and fighting has succeeded in filling you with the holiday spirit. Whatever you plans are, enjoy yourself tomorrow. It may well be the most important day of your year. But for M Bison, it will be Tuesday.

Goodnight and good luck.