Can I just say a huge thank you to everyone reviewing? I was overwhelmed by the amount of reviews on the last chapter, so thank you for making me smile with your kind words.
Thank you to Gillian Deverone for beta'ing :)
Enjoy!
She feels the air leave her in one quick motion, unable to think, never mind respond to him. He's just asked her to marry him, as in become his wife marry; to the guy who's she's barely been with for longer than a week and now he's proposing. She feels lightheaded, thousands of thoughts whizzing around her head at once.
Everything is silent. She can't even hear her own heartbeat, which had been pounding in her head just a moment ago.
And she knows that she needs to say something soon.
Right now, she's finding it pretty impossible to pinpoint one thought in the mass of them; so many reasons for and against.
Marriage, that's such a big step, a bigger step than many have even had to consider before. Even after dating Jesse for all that time marriage hadn't really crossed her mind and now, she's faced head on with it. No warning, no suspicions. It's just right in front of her.
And she has to answer him.
But they barely know each other. Well, they do. She knows how it takes him a while to wake up in the mornings, and how he likes his coffees, and sometimes he just like to relax and watch cartoons that remind him of his childhood… yet there's still so much to learn about Finn. And she isn't sure what she'll discover.
He has a dark past – she won't judge him for it, not now that she knows him. She's guilty of doing it in the past; just making rash judgements, and Finn's past is unfortunate, but she knows that his future is bright, so full of light and happiness. Something that will make all his pain seem worth waiting for.
Their future, if she says just one word.
Finn is looking up at her and God, his eyes are so hopeful, so adoring as he gazes upon her that her heart clenches then swells to ten times its size, filled with love. She loves Finn Hudson. She loves him so, so much, like that love just wants to jump out of her heart and make itself know to the entire world - shouting her feelings loudly from rooftops. It's so strong, so powerful, that she can't imagine not loving him, not being with him for the rest of her life.
The answer suddenly becomes much easier.
Summoning her voice, she manages out a 'yes', nodding her head quickly as tears spring from her eyes. Finn stands up in a second, taking hold of Rachel and spinning her around as she clings to him during his excited spins of glee. Their mouths meet in a searing kiss, her lips salty from her tears, and the small action is filled with pure happiness. They can't hear the audience clapping; they can't even see them – it's just the two of them, them in their own little universe.
They're separated when Puck says, "Geez Hudson, let the girl breathe." But the two continue to smile at each other, and he takes the ring from the box, sliding it onto her shaky finger.
She can't help but think how right it looks to be placed on there. Judging by the expression on Finn's face, he's thinking the same thing.
"Thank you everybody," he says into the microphone, offering a small wave before leading Rachel off of the stage. In an instant, he's bombarded by his friends, all hugging and congratulating them both. Finn feels on cloud nine. She'd said yes. She's his fiancé now. Hearing a squeal, he sees Puck with his arms around her, pulling her into a tight hug.
"Thanks for making my boy so happy," he tells her and Rachel beams like somebody's just hung the moon up for her. Finn takes her hand again, never wanting to let go of it, especially when he feels the ring on her finger. They're engaged. Never in a million years would he have thought this'd happen, but with Rachel it feels amazing and perfect and wonderful, and all those other happy words that he's too dazed to think of right now.
Mrs. Rachel Hudson.
Why does that sound so right to him?
Like it was meant to happen? He kisses her, he kisses her a lot. Whenever he gets the chance. The feeling of her lips on his is amazing, thrilling, and it's somehow a million times better now that she's said yes.
She beams, so brightly, and holds his hand, or leans her head against his shoulder. Just always touching him. His friends seem genuinely happy for him, and they must see how amazing Rachel is too, how she's changed him for good. He notices the award in Mike's hands, and he almost forgot that they'd won, 'cause he was more focused on the whole proposal part and not screwing up in front of thousands of people. But this day… it doesn't seem like it can get any better.
They walk, and he's a little unsteady 'cause the adrenaline of everything has left him kind of dizzy, but with Rachel's hand firmly in his he's okay. He's just kind of waiting for his heart to stop beating so hard.
Rachel slows, letting Finn's friends walk ahead, and she smiles sweetly at him, eyes shining. "Hi," she says simply.
"Hey," he replies, a smirk playing on his lips. It's silent for a moment, as they take in each other, hands still entwined between them.
"You proposed," she breathes, like she almost doesn't believe it for a minute. It is Finn after all. Maybe this is just some hopeful dream that she's having, her mind telling her that she wants him to propose. It feels real though. And she looks at him; it doesn't feel like a dream, not one bit. His hands are solid in hers. Warm, rough. She smiles.
"Glad you remember," he chuckles, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles delicately. His friends are probably wondering where they went, or suspect that they've snuck off to make out or something. That's what newly engaged couples do, right? Finn can't keep the grin off of his face.
She bites her lip, holds his hands tighter. "I love you."
And like, he should be expecting something like that. He just proposed to her after all, but it kind of knocks him unsteady, making his head whiz a little more.
He wants to hear her say that over and over.
Without missing a beat, he says, "I love you too."
Finn never knew that you could fall in love this fast. Hell, he never thought he'd even fall in love – sometimes he'd doubted the very existence of the feelings but now, with Rachel, he knows what it is. And he'll never forget the intense feeling that it brings; the connection he feels with her, the one that brings them closer each second.
Leaning down, he kisses her softly, taking the time to savor each moment. There's no rush. They've got the rest of their lives together now.
Her arms move to circle around his neck, holding onto him, and she smiles into the kiss. She squeals as he lifts her off of the floor, her body clinging to his. Finn laughs, kissing at her neck, "I've got you babe, don't worry."
"I'm not," she says, "I'm just not used to being this high up. I'm pretty sure it's colder up here." She grins to herself and tries to squirm out of his grasp, but Finn just tightens his hold on his girl and kisses her again. "Finn," she begins, "put me down."
Her demanding tone does nothing to urge him, and he makes a slow trail of kisses from her jaw to her lips, his tongue teasing the skin and rendering her speechless. Not many people can leave Rachel Berry without words. He eventually tears himself from her, letting her slide back down onto the floor where she just shakes her head at him. "I hate you," she mumbles with a wide pout.
He shakes his head, "You hate that I can make you silent in all about five seconds."
She huffs and starts to walk ahead of him, adding a little sway to her hips. Not an instant later, she's tugging on his hand and glancing over her shoulder. "You coming?"
He's caught up in a couple of strides, his arm slipping around her shoulder. Without thinking he kisses her forehead gently, smiling sweetly as he looks into her eyes. "Let's go," he says.
He's determined not to get drunk at the after party, seeing as the last time him and Rachel got drunk together it ended up with her name permanently tattooed across his hip, and he doesn't need another fiasco like that thank you very much. He'd probably wake up with like a kitten tattoo or something, 'cause Rachel could convince him to get one of anything if he's drunk enough and she uses those puppy dog eyes on him.
But anyway, he's only gonna drink a little. Or so he hopes. Smirking at Rachel, he sees that she hasn't got quite the same plan. She's like the most excitable drunk he's ever met, and is about a hundred times more adorable than normal, which is really saying something. She ends up resting in the crook of his arm, swaying and singing a song quietly to him. He's not even quite sure what she's singing, but her voice sounds nice so he doesn't stop her.
He sighs when he needs the bathroom 'cause he doesn't really wanna leave her alone like this, but nature calls so he just sits her down with Mike and his girlfriend, and asks them to keep an eye on her.
"I wanna come with you Finny," she tugs on his jacket, pouting like an upset child.
Finn laughs, "I don't think you do Rach." He kisses her quickly, "I'll be right back. You just stay here and… tell Mike and Tina a little bit about yourself."
"An excellent idea," she beams, turning to the two to share what's most likely her life story with them. He smiles fondly as he stands up to leave.
Before he can make it to the bathroom, he hears the loud voice of his brother. "Finn! Get over here right now." He's not sure where his voice is coming from, but he sure sounds pissed and Finn's body is instantly flooded with fear. Kurt is scary when he's pissed.
He barely registers when Kurt's small hand clamps around his upper arm, dragging him with impossible strength down the hall. He opens some random door and stuffs them both inside of this tiny little closet. His head hits a series of shelves, causing him to curse and glare at Kurt, "I don't mean to be rude or anything, but what the hell?"
As soon as his eyes meet the glare of his brother, he shifts uncomfortably on the spot, wanting to be anywhere but here.
"What?" He pretends that he doesn't know what he's done wrong. And he hasn't done anything wrong, per se. He's just… not followed the rules, and Kurt's a sucker for rules. Yeah, a proposal probably wasn't in his plan for all for all of this – nowhere near a proposal actually, and now he's messed everything up. He does that a lot, so he doesn't really feel too bad. To be honest any negative feelings are being usurped by those incredibly happy, excited ones. He's engaged, and not even Kurt's death glare and unending lecture will change that.
"You, Finn Hudson, you never can listen, can you? You always have to do things your way." He points his finger in his face and maybe it's supposed to be threatening, but Finn has to suppress a laugh. "Marriage! You can't get married." Kurt's voice takes on an unnaturally loud whisper. "You're supposed to break up in a few months, and then that'll be it."
He makes a pained expression at the idea. There is absolutely no way that he's breaking up with her, publicity or not – they're going to get married and have their happily ever after, and nothing – not even his high strung brother – is going to get in the way of that.
Kurt notices the look on his face. He knows that because his own turns into one of confusion. "What's going on with you two?" he demands to know, hand placed on his hip, "you used to hate her Finn and now you barely notice when anyone else is in the room…" He shakes his head. "You know what I thought when you began to act like that? I convinced myself that you'd started using drugs again – that'd explain your weird behavior and your secrecy. You always seemed to be hiding something."
He rolls his eyes 'cause how many times does he has to say it? He's not ever doing drugs again. Besides, he remembers what Kurt'd said to him last time he was in rehab ("I'm your brother, and I love you, but this has to stop," his eyes shook with unshed tears, "and if this happens again… I'll have no choice. I'll call the police… You'll face the consequences.") And yes, he doesn't want to let his brother, and his family, and Rachel down.
"Look, that's ridiculous. I just," he doesn't quite no how to say it. Why do feelings have to be all complicated and stuff? "I act different because she makes me different – she makes me good, Kurt. Rachel makes me feel special, and loved, and I love her. I love her so much."
He almost expects Kurt to be more shocked. He's not exactly the type of person you'd expect to fall in love with Rachel Berry, after all. Kurt just stares at him, like he's trying to figure something out, and Finn moves his gaze to the floor, unable to look into Kurt's eyes. He's never admitted that he loves someone before. It feels a little strange, but good at the same time. His shoulders suddenly feel lighter; he even manages a tiny smile.
Kurt's movements are slow, careful, before he begins to speak. "You really love her?
"Yes," he doesn't even have to think about it, the response engraved into his mind. "I really do."
"…this isn't just some…some game that you're playing?" He frowns. "This isn't like you Finn. You're not the type of person to just fall in love, especially with Rachel Berry of all people."
"The old me wasn't that person," he counters, "but the new me is. The new me loves Rachel Berry so much that it hurts, more than he ever thought he could love another person. And it's terrifies him and excites him at the same time."
His brother runs a hand over his face, letting out a long sigh. "This is crazy."
"I know," Finn agrees. "Love is supposed to be crazy and stuff though, isn't it?" he smiles widely.
Kurt stares at him, looking straight into his eyes, and it's totally awkward, but Finn stays silent 'cause Kurt's pissed at him so annoying him further isn't the best of ideas. "You're not lying."
"What?"
"You – your eyes tell when you lie, but… not this time. So it looks like you're telling the truth."
He frowns, "Why is it so hard to believe?"
Kurt merely raises his eyebrow in response, and crosses his arms tightly around his chest. "I guess that I've got to replan everything now, since I'm guessing that the break up won't be happening."
Finn shakes his head vigorously.
"But Kurt, I… I just want to be a fiance to her. No planning public appearances together, letting the paparazzi know. This isn't for them anymore. It's for us, and I want us to be a real couple together. Not a staged couple."
"Who said anything about planning appearances?" Kurt questions, "I meant planning your wedding."
"Y-you would do that?" he asks, shock registering in his voice.
He manages a smile, "I'm kind of upset that you both kept this from me. I mean, I don't even know how long you've been together like this, but," his smile widens, "you're my only brother Finn, and your planning skills are hopeless, so it only makes sense that I help." He leans in closer to whisper, "I don't trust Rachel's planning skills either."
With a loud chuckle, he replies, "She'll kill you if she hears your saying that."
"Then it's a good thing she won't hear me saying it," he announces.
A smile tugs at Finn's lips, "Thanks man, for being cool about this. I just – "
"Really love her," Kurt finishes. "Yes, you've said it enough times. I get the point!" His eyebrows suddenly dip together. "…why're you hopping from one foot to another?"
"I need to go to the bathroom. That's where I was going before you dragged me in here."
A look of exasperation crosses Kurt's face and he shakes his head, pushing Finn out and in the direction of the bathroom. Finn suddenly feels all the weight off of his shoulders. Everyone knows, and they're happy about it, or as happy as they can be. He feels that Kurt'll warm up to the idea after he's gotten used to it. He feels nervous at the thought of having to see her dads again, wondering if they'll be supportive…
Finn sighs.
After doing his business, he goes back to find Rachel, hoping that she's still with Tina and Mike, and isn't doing anything that she'll regret in the morning. But when he gets back to her friends, she's nowhere to be found. "Where is she?" he asks, using his height to scan around the room easily.
"She went looking for you," Mike says, "I tried to stop her, but she threatened to throw her shoe at me…"
"What?"
"I panicked!" He defends himself. "She went through that door." He points to one to their right and, with a sigh, Finn goes in search of his intoxicated fiancé.
He kind of hopes that he'll be able to hear her voice, 'cause she's super loud like, all of the time, but then he hears no voice that sounds like hers and frowns further. There are a few other people scattered about, but none are small and brunette.
He sees Jesse pass him, that smug look plastered into his face, an air of superiority about him, despite that he still has the bruises from Finn's punch on his face. His eyes stay drawn to Finn, and he feels a shiver run through his body. He looks pleased with himself, and that scares the hell out of Finn.
Where's Rachel?
He looks more frantically.
"You better watch your back Hudson," Jesse's says, a malicious smile growing on his lips, eyes amused. And like, normally he just ignores stupid things like this. Jesse must be bitter about this, after all, but the way that he's looking at him… he doesn't like it one bit.
But Jesse is now retreating, his smile never faltering, and Finn's worry is increasing by the second. He walks faster, legs stretching in long strides.
As he turns the corner, he almost knocks her over. She must have been rushing too. "Rach," he breathes. She's still stumbling a little, and her eyes are a little glazed over, but she's sobered up since before, which is a welcome relief. "I was worried about you."
"I'm fine," she says slowly, "I just, uh, had a little run in with Jesse."
A protectiveness overtakes him and he wraps his arms around her, "What did he say? Are you alright?"
She shakes her head, adding a smile to reassure him. "Everything's fine," she slurs slightly. "He's just a little upset. You can imagine…" Rachel opens her mouth to speak again, but immediately closes it.
"And…?"
"Nothing," she says, "it's not important. Can we go back to the party now?"
With a sigh, he agrees. Still, Jesse's words linger over his mind for a little while longer.
They get back to his apartment in a flurry of limbs and moans, Rachel pressed against his door while he tries to clumsily open it. "Hurry," she whines, rubbing herself against Finn, and his pretty evident arousal, to speed him up. If anything, it makes him more flustered. But soon enough they're inside. And he's kind of stumbling a little, but he manages to keep them both upright. They fall into a tangled mess on the couch, his hand wandering her body greedily, pride swelling at her noises of appreciation.
He's suddenly pinned by her small frame, attacked by her lips. Finn's not complaining though. She'll probably be annoyed in the morning 'cause she'll ruin her dress, crease it and everything, and maybe he can help with that. She looks much better without the dress anyway.
For a moment, her ring catches the light, and it's all that Finn can stare at. There's an overwhelming happiness that surges through him as he does so, a smile tugging at his lips.
She seems to follow suit, grinning giddily, "I still can't believe that you proposed." A serene smile takes over her face, and she leans down to kiss him, gently this time, full of love. She tastes like alcohol, but he doesn't mind.
"Me either," he says, "I'm glad I did though. Really glad."
With a happy sigh, she leans her head against his chest and hums quietly to herself. "Love you," he says again, because he just really likes saying it.
"Love you too," she replies, kissing his cheek. She falls asleep pretty easily after that, and he sits up, leaving her on the couch while he takes off her shoes and puts a blanket over her. The events of the day seem to catch up on him, and soon he's drifting off too, Rachel's warm body beside his.
Hmm, what's Jesse up to?
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